'Major Carter.' Sam fought her way through the groggy cloud stifling her thoughts. Where was she? She hadn't yet opened her eyes, but the sounds were vaguely familiar. She was lying flat on her back. Her whole body ached. 'Major Carter,' came the voice again--except, it wasn't a voice per se, more of a thought within her own mind. . . . A shudder ran through her as memory returned. She had agreed to a blending. That's where she was, in a Tok'ra complex. And that voice meant that she had already been blended.
'Who are you?' thought Sam in response.
'I am Anise,' came the answer.
Anise. Well, at least it was someone she knew. Sam thought back to before she'd been brought here, trying to fill in the blanks. Antarctica. The frozen Ancient girl. Everyone getting sick. She remembered Jonas explaining something to her. Ayiana had died before she and Ja--the Colonel could be healed. The Tok'ra were confident that a symbiote could cure them. Something about a host dying before an agent could report. . ., 'What about Freya?' Sam asked at last. Was Freya the one who had died? Was she going to be Anise's new host until a volunteer could be found?
'Freya is well,' Anise replied. 'She is young, relatively new to the Tok'ra, and so was able to give me up to you temporarily. Many of the older hosts could not have survived without their symbiote for the time required. I will return to her once you are fully healed.' That's a relief. 'No offense,' Sam added mentally, aware that Anise could essentially read her thoughts.
'I will not pry into your subconscious, Major,' said Anise. 'I cannot help which conscious thoughts may reveal themselves to me, but you will be as aware as I, I assure you.'
'Thank you,' said Sam. 'And you don't have to call me Major,' she added.
'Very well, Samantha.'
Sam thought how very different this was in comparison to when she had been host to Jolinar. Then, she had been fighting the blending every step of the way, terrified of what the Goa'uld might do to her, despite the Tok'ra's assurances. Now, she was at ease, knowing that Anise really was trying to help her--and quite selflessly at that. She had a vague recollection from Jolinar of how dangerous it was to change hosts. . . especially to the former host.
'The transference was carefully monitored to ensure the safety of all concerned,' Anise explained. As she "spoke," Sam had an image of herself and Colonel O'Neill lying on slabs in an isolated room off of a Tok'ra tunnel. She realized it was Freya's perspective before the blending, but carefully selected and revealed to Sam, unlike the haphazard thoughts that Anise must be sorting through in her mind. 'But I do appreciate your concern.'
'Why is it that I can't hear all of your thoughts like you seem to hear mine?' asked Sam, slowly managing to get her arm to move so that she could touch the Tok'ra biosensor on her chest that she'd seen in the glimpse of herself.
'I am a bit more practiced at keeping my internal monologue private. Otherwise, life as a blended pair would become extremely taxing on both parties.'
'I guess it would,' Sam observed. 'I'd better apologize now for when I start mentally rambling.'
'No apology is necessary,' said Anise, politely.
'If you're healing me, then who's blended with the Colonel?' Sam asked.
'Kanan. You may not know him. He it was whose host died before he could report on his latest mission. We have hopes that once Colonel O'Neill is sufficiently recovered, he will be able to reveal the details he's learned of Zipacna's activities.'
'And then what?' asked Sam. Would he be expected to continue as Kanan's host?
'If a suitable volunteer host is not found, Kanan will be returned to stasis, once O'Neill is healed.'
That was a relief. She could only imagine how Ja--how he was taking this as it was. Sam continued to lie on the hard bed with her eyes closed. She was still extremely weak. 'How long is this expected to take?' she asked after a minute.
'Your illness was severe. We estimate three to four days for a full recovery for yourself and Colonel O'Neill. We have, in fact, already been blended for a day, but you only recently regained consciousness.' After a few moments, Anise inquired, 'May I ask, why is it that you do not wish for me to call you "Major," but you correct yourself in your own thoughts if you think of the Colonel as "Jack?"'
'Do I?' said Sam futilely. She knew very well that Anise could see the images her mind conjured at the thought of being able to call him "Jack." 'It's just not very practical, considering our work,' Sam added lamely. 'You saw yourself the impact emotions could have on our jobs--even when we don't act on them.' The image of Jack staring at her from beyond the force field on Apophis' ship came to mind, along with the memory of her fear for him and the secret thrill she felt at thinking she'd seen just how he really felt for her.
'It is no wonder Freya's advances were so quickly rebuffed,' Anise said after some silence.
It took a moment for her words to sink in. '"Advances?"' Sam asked.
'Yes, well, during the Zatarc incident, Freya took it upon herself to visit the Colonel in his room, and express her--interest.' Sam got quite a clear image of kissing Jack O'Neill, and not being "rebuffed" quickly enough for a twinge of jealousy not to rear its head.
'Just Freya?' Sam asked, surprised that Anise would try to place all of the blame on her host. From her memories of Jolinar, she had been under the impression that host and symbiote were usually in complete agreement on matters of the heart.
'Freya and I are both quite strong-willed, Samantha,' she explained. 'While it is true that Tok'ra share the body equally, there is often a great deal of compromise involved. From what I knew of Jolinar and Lantesh, their relationship was quite rare among the Tok'ra in that for each, host and symbiote were quite like-minded, especially in their affection for the other. If not for my sympathy for Freya, whose life will be much briefer than that which I have already lived, we would have pursued Doctor Jackson.'
'Daniel?' Sam smiled, imagining his reaction if Anise had taken that direction. 'No offense,' she repeated.
'None taken,' Anise assured her. 'But you need not fear for your teammates. Freya and I have come to an agreement, and are now involved with Malek of the Tok'ra.'
'Ah, well, congratulations,' said Sam. She received an image of a tall, brown-haired man whom she didn't recognize, but couldn't help the thought that he wasn't nearly as good looking as Jack.
'To each her own,' came the reply, with what Sam would have sworn was a mental smirk.
'Whatever,' Sam said good-naturedly. She was surprised at how much she missed nice, old-fashioned "girl talk." As good a friend as Janet was, Sam hadn't seen fit to be quite as honest with her about her feelings for Jack as she was of necessity with Anise. She also noticed that along with her improving mood, her body seemed to be recovering some of its strength. 'Is it alright if I sit up and have a look around?' she asked.
'Certainly, as long as you feel up to it,' Anise told her. Slowly, Sam opened her eyes. She blinked a few times, accustoming herself to the lighting, and recognized the ceiling and walls typical of Tok'ra tunnels. Turning her head to the right, she saw Jack--she'd decided to go along with Anise on thinking of him by his name rather than rank--on a similar table, still asleep. She saw some Tok'ra-esqe garments folded next to their beds, and realized they were each only covered with a blanket. She pulled her stack of clothes under the blanket with her, and tried to dress. It would have been no more difficult than changing in a sleeping bag, except that she was still quite weak.
With Anise's help, she managed to complete the task without putting anything on backwards. With an effort, she propped herself up on her elbows. She finally managed to sit upright, swinging her legs over the right side of the bed. 'I thought the Tok'ra don't use doors,' she said, seeing the door in the wall on the far side of Jack. 'You were in isolation when you were first brought here. This segment of tunnel was created and sealed off in order to prevent the spread of the disease. A force field would have sufficed, but if there had been a power failure before this room had been properly decontaminated, the entire base could have been exposed.'
'Making it impossible for Freya to give you up without succumbing herself to the disease,' observed Sam.
'Quite correct,' Anise answered.
Sam turned her attention back to Jack. He seemed to be resting peacefully enough. She tried a quiet "sir?" to see if he was awake. His eyes fluttered open, and he seemed to be straining to focus on the ceiling above him. "Over here, sir," Sam said, gaining his attention.
Turning his head toward her, he gave her a weak smile. "Carter. Good to see you're up and about," he said hoarsely. "Nice threads," he added after another moment.
"How're you doing, sir?" she asked.
"I'm alive," he said bluntly. Nope, he wasn't enjoying the blending. "And you can lay off the 'sirs' while I've got this snake in my head, please." Not enjoying it at all.
'Do you think you can handle calling him "Jack?"' Anise asked cheekily.
'Oh, I think I'll manage,' Sam mentally replied. 'And I promise you I'll enjoy every minute of it.' Not that she'd want to spend her life like this, but Sam wasn't minding her new confidant. "Jack," she said aloud, catching him off guard by her sudden use of his name, "just don't try to fight the blending. Kanan can help you a lot more easily if you let him."
"So he's told me," he admitted. Apparently, he'd been getting acquainted with his symbiote as well. "Doesn't mean I have to like it, does it?"
"I guess not," Sam conceded. She watched as he shut his eyes and made an effort to sit up. He got as far as propping himself up on his arms, when he gave in and laid back down. Sam was about to tell him to take it easy, when he sat up quickly and swung his legs around, mirroring her position.
"What?" he asked.
Sam realized she was staring. As he sat, his blanket had slipped down to his waist. "Uh," she answered eloquently.
Jack looked down at himself, then at her, then saw his own stack of clothes. "Would you excuse me?" he said quickly, reaching out for the garments and whipping them under his blanket.
"Sure," said Sam with a smile, turning away to give him some privacy. She heard him wrestling with the strange clothes, and knew he was having as much difficulty as she had. At last, the muffled curses ceased.
"That's better, I guess," she heard him say.
Turning back to him, she saw him seated once again, now dressed in a typical Tok'ra outfit.
"Better than nothing," she consoled.
"So, who's your. . . ?" he asked, gesturing toward her head.
"Anise, actually," Sam answered him. She and Anise were equally amused at the frightened look that came over Jack's face.
"Really?" was all he said.
"Yes, and I do know about Freya's attempted seduction," she continued brazenly, "but you don't have to worry. Anise wasn't really interested in you herself, so she's not going to try and get me to do anything to you." Sam was proud of how she was able to look him straight in the eye as she spoke, and nearly burst out laughing at his shocked expression.
Jack recovered well enough, and moved quickly to gain the upper hand. "That's a relief," he said, looking around the room briefly. "I was starting to worry that these close quarters and lack of clothes had been her idea." He turned back to her with a rather flirtatious grin that caught Sam off guard.
Chickening out, Sam turned the conversation. "Is Kanan going to be able to report on his last mission?" she asked abruptly, not meeting his eyes and fighting down the blush she felt creeping up her neck.
'Samantha,' came the reprimand, 'I am surprised at you; backing down from a challenge. You did start it, after all.'
'Yes, well,' she retorted, 'I'm sorry. I wasn't expecting him to come back like that.'
"Sam?" Jack asked, calling her back from her thoughts.
She looked over at him, and saw the concern on his face. "Sorry," she said, pleased that he'd dropped the "Carter." "We were just chatting," she said smiling, and pointing to her head by way of explanation.
"Ah," he replied, with a more relaxed expression. "Well, I said yes, he's got his report all set to give to the council."
"That's good," said Sam, adding, "I'm sorry about his last host."
Jack looked uncomfortable, but only said, "It happens." After a moment, he seemed to come back to himself, and glanced at the door. "Any idea how long we need to stay in here?"
'I do not believe the door is locked,' Anise supplied. 'You should be free to leave.'
"We should be able to leave whenever we want," Sam answered. "Anise doesn't think they locked the door. It was just installed for before they'd decontaminated the room."
Jack jumped off of his slab, but found his legs weren't quite ready to support his weight. His knees buckled, and he only just caught himself by leaning on Sam's table. Automatically, her hand went to his arm to help him. "I'm okay," he said, shakily bringing himself upright.
"Maybe you should take it easy, Jack," she said with a smile, enjoying the look he shot her as she played innocent. She slid off of her slab more carefully, leaning slightly on his arm where she'd been supporting him.
He held her elbow until she'd steadied herself. "All set?" he asked, when she seemed settled.
"Let's go," she answered, and followed him to the door.
She didn't see any control interface, let alone a handle, as they approached. Jack walked up to the door and gave it a push, without success. He pressed his face against the transparent section, scanning the hallway outside. Apparently catching sight of someone, he began knocking on the door and called out, "Hello? Anyone got the key to this thing?" He stood back, and Sam heard a few clicks. The door slid open, and she followed Jack through what seemed to be an air lock and into the corridor. "Hi, there," said Jack to the Tok'ra who had let them out. "Baldesh, is it?" He nodded. Sam was pleased to see that Jack was apparently on good enough terms with Kanan that he was accepting input such as the names of his fellow Tok'ra. "Yes, well, we're just going to have a look around now, if that's alright." Baldesh nodded again, and Jack started off down the hallway to their left.
After they'd walked a short distance, Jack leaned over and spoke quietly to Sam. "Kanan's a bit disoriented," he admitted. "Do you know where they keep the bathrooms?"
Sam smiled. "Right this way," she said as Anise communicated the information to her. She circumvented the corridor they'd just taken, so that Baldesh wouldn't see them reversing direction.
After they'd reached their destination and performed the necessary ablutions, they went in search of food. Locating the Tok'ra version of a commissary, they filled their plates, and took a table in the corner for themselves. They ate fairly quickly, both out of hunger, and out of a desire to think as little as possible about what they were really consuming.
As they finished their meal, a voice called to them from the commissary entrance. "Colonel O'Neill, Major Carter." It was Freya. She walked over to their table, and took the seat next to Jack. He moved over to ensure she had plenty of elbow room. "I am pleased to see you are both doing well," she said.
'May I?' Anise asked Sam.
'Oh, sure,' she replied, realizing that Anise wanted to speak directly with her former host.
"We are quite well, Freya," Anise said aloud, through Sam's altered voice. Jack looked up a bit shocked, but seemed to compose himself quickly enough. "How are you doing?" Anise asked.
"It is quite strange, but I am physically fine. You are missed, my friend," Freya answered with a smile.
"Was there anything else you wanted?" Jack interjected.
"Yes," she replied. "When the council learned you were awake, they sent me to ascertain whether Kanan would now be able to deliver his report," she answered him.
"I am able, as soon as the council wishes to convene," came Kanan's reply. Sam now understood Jack's shocked expression of a few moments ago. It was a definite surprise to hear the Tok'ra speaking through Jack.
"Then you should come with me now," Freya replied. "They are currently in session, and will be able to hear you shortly," she said, getting up from the table, apparently waiting for them to follow.
Freya led them through the corridors, toward the council chamber. She paused on the way by a room on their right. "Major Carter, you may wish to wait here. These quarters have been made available for you and the Colonel for the duration of your stay. Kanan's mission report will be at a closed session."
"Ah, alright," Sam answered, poking her head through the doorway and surveying the space.
"I'll meet you here when we're done, Sam," Jack told her.
She nodded, and watched the two continue down the corridor and around a corner. Entering the room, she saw a couple of smaller rooms leading off of the main. Inside the apparent bedrooms were some slabs, only slightly more comfortable looking than the ones that had been in their isolation chamber. She sat down on a chair in the main room, and suddenly felt exhaustion catch up with her.
As her eyes began to drift closed, Anise spoke. 'Perhaps you should lie down, Samantha,' came the suggestion.
'Good idea,' Sam replied. Getting up with an effort, she just managed to reach one of the beds and lie down, before letting sleep take over.
Sam awoke some time later to the sound of unfamiliar voices outside of her room. "Thank you, Thoran. I am sure I shall be fine from here."
"Take care, my friend. And be assured, our search continues."
"Thank you, indeed," came the first voice again.
One set of footsteps seemed to depart, while another sounded like they were coming toward her room. Sam opened her eyes, and rolled on her side to watch the doorway. To her relief, Jack appeared.
"Hey, there," he said, stopping at the doorway when he saw her lying there.
"How'd it go?" she asked.
"Fine. Kanan got to spill all the juicy details on ol' Zippy and his fleet. Some good stuff, actually," he said.
"That's good," Sam replied. "Was that you I heard? Talking to 'Thoran,' was it?"
"One of Kanan's buddies," Jack explained. "He's sent a message to Hammond, letting him know we're still recovering. I figure we can call home ourselves tomorrow." After a pause, he added, "They're still looking for a host for him." Sam thought he looked worried for a moment, but then saw his face relax in what she now recognized as an internal discussion with his symbiote.
She remembered how nervous she'd been when she thought she might be carrying Anise indefinitely. "I'm sure it'll work out," she said, now sitting up with an effort.
"I didn't mean to wake you," he said, coming out of his reverie. "I was actually hoping to lie down myself for a while."
"How long have I been out?" Sam asked, realizing she still felt rather tired.
"I've only been gone about three hours," Jack answered, "so it depends on how fast you fell asleep."
"About three hours, then," Sam replied with a smile. "Okay, I'll see you in a bit," she said, quite willingly lying back down and feeling her eyes close heavily.
"'Night, Sam," Jack said quietly, turning from the doorway.
"G'night, Jack," she said weakly, sleep already taking her.
--
Chapter 2
It was several hours before Sam awoke once more, quite refreshed after some rather pleasant dreams involving Jack. She smiled, and then froze, mentally preparing herself for the teasing, or at least the comments. 'I had not intended to say anything,' came Anise's voice.
'Well, go on, get it out anyway,' said Sam.
'I will only say,' Anise supplied, 'that while Freya's imagination is quite creative, yours is much more. . . vivid.'
Sam blushed, but retorted, 'Well, they're only dreams.'
'As you say,' said Anise.
'And what is that supposed to mean?' Sam asked.
'Only that it seems to me that Jack cares as deeply for you as you do for him. However, you choose to ignore this, and tell yourself that yours are merely one-sided emotions. Despite the rules and regulations you quote, I do not doubt he would find a way to make a deeper relationship possible, if you only allowed him.'
Sam didn't really have an answer to that, at least, nothing Anise hadn't essentially just called bologna. At last, she said, 'He hasn't done anything--'
But Anise cut her off, 'You know quite well that he would wait for you to make any "first moves." You told him you were fine with your revelations remaining in the observation room after the Zatarc incident.'
'Good point,' Sam admitted. That seemed to be the end of the discussion for now. Anise apparently just wanted to let her remarks sink in for the time being. Sam briefly wondered if her father had had as interesting a time adjusting to Selmak.
'Knowing Selmak,' came the response, 'I imagine Jacob's experience was much more confrontational,' Anise answered with another mental smile.
Sam got up and walked into their main room, shaking her head and slightly pitying her father. The lights had been dimmed, and were off completely in Jack's bedroom. She could make out his form, asleep on the bed and facing away from her. She turned back to the main room, and thought about just sitting there and waiting for him to wake, but she was getting rather bored. She would have gone exploring, but she did want to be there when Jack got up.
'Would some of my journals interest you, Samantha?' Anise offered.
'Yes, actually, that'd be great,' she answered.
Wordlessly, Sam surrendered control of her body, and Anise walked out into the corridor. She didn't have to go far before she found a Tok'ra who was willing to go and get the books for her from Freya. They came back to the room, and Sam took a seat, now consoled that she wouldn't be sitting there long without anything with which to occupy her mind. 'Present company excluded,' she added, realizing the irony of her last thought.
'I understand the need to be "doing" something,' Anise responded. 'Freya is much the same way.'
Before much time had passed, Sam heard Jack begin to stir. At first, she thought he was waking up, but then she realized he must be dreaming. It seemed to be a nightmare, from the way he was tossing and turning. Cautiously, she made her way to his bedside, and reached out a hand to his shoulder. "Jack," she said softly. He still seemed deep in his dream, so she shook his shoulder a bit more forcefully. "Jack," she called.
He tensed as his eyes shot open. "Shallan," was all he said, before he took in his surroundings and met Sam's eyes. "Sorry," he said. "Dreaming, I guess."
"More like a nightmare. You said 'Shallan,' just as you woke up," Sam observed. "What's that mean?"
"It's--" he began, but just then a voice came from the entrance way.
"Anise, Major Carter?" Freya called.
"I'll be right back," said Sam, letting go of Jack's arm, and going out to meet Freya.
"Thank you, Freya," Sam allowed Anise to say. "These are most appreciated," she said, taking a stack of about ten journals from Freya. "I trust you have plenty of research with which to occupy yourself in their absence?"
"You know that well," she answered. "Major Carter, I believe you will find these subjects of particular interest, compared to the obscure nature of much of our other work. Is there anything else I can do for you?"
"I believe we will be fine for now, thank you again," said Anise, walking her to the door.
"I wish both you and the Colonel a speedy recovery, Major," said Freya just before she left. "Good night, Anise." With that, she departed.
Sam came back to Jack's room, and found him sitting on the edge of his bed with his head in his hands. "What is it?" she asked, setting the journals down on a chair by the doorway.
Jack looked up as she came in. "Just a friendly debate," he said.
"Anything you want to talk about?" Sam asked.
Jack was silent for a moment, apparently discussing something with Kanan. "Could I please speak with Anise for a moment," came Kanan's reply.
"What is it, Kanan?" Sam heard Anise ask.
"A matter which requires the utmost secrecy," Kanan answered. "If it were possible, I would not have discussed it with Jack. Can I trust to your discretion?" he asked.
"You should know that implicitly; of course you can," she answered.
With that, the symbiotes relinquished control to their hosts. "It was a few months back," Jack now continued. "Kanan was on a mission to infiltrate Ball's secret fortress thing." After a moment, he corrected himself. "Ba'al's fortress," he said.
Anise recalled the details of the mission debriefing: secret weapons technology, gravity field generators. "He came back with the entire place mapped out, including all its defenses," said Sam.
"Right," said Jack. "But what weren't in the report were the details of just how and why Ba'al's lotar helped him to all of that intel." Sam was silent, waiting for him to continue. Even Anise had no speculation to contribute.
"Her name was Shallan," Jack said quietly, staring blankly at the floor. Sam suspected from his tone that she knew where this was going. "At first, she was just a means to an end. But eventually, he ended up telling her the truth about his mission. She hated Ba'al. She only served as lotar because it was the only life she'd known. After Kanan told her about the Tok'ra, she did everything she could to get him the most detailed information she could on Ba'al's doings. She asked if he could take her with him, but he told her his mission wouldn't allow it. He--" Jack cut himself off. He seemed to be choked up. He took a few breaths, then looked Sam in the eye. "He loved her," he said. "And he left her there," he concluded, looking back at the floor.
'How could he?' thought Sam, imagining the horror of living as a Goa'uld's slave, especially when you realized how evil they were.
'The Tok'ra have survived this war by accepting the necessity of sacrifice,' supplied Anise.
'Well, we don't leave people behind,' came the mantra in response. 'Especially if he loved her--' Sam realized she was thinking again of the force field on Apophis' ship, when Jack wouldn't leave her even to save himself.
'I see,' said Anise simply.
Sam reached out and touched Jack's arm. "Is there anything I can do?" she asked, not able to imagine what could possibly help.
Jack looked back up. "He wants to save her," he said.
"The Tok'ra won't go along with it," Sam observed.
"We know," said Jack, looking at her and willing her to understand.
"But the Tok'ra don't need to know," Sam concluded with a small smile.
"Exactly," said Jack.
After a moment, Sam asked, "Are you up to it? Physically I mean?"
"I'm fine. I'll need to hang on to Kanan for maybe another day before I can do without him, but with him I'm as good as new. How 'bout you?"
"Same here," she answered. Sam consulted with Anise. 'He has all the necessary intel for a quick extraction to work,' she said. 'With just two of us, we should be able to get in and out undetected.'
'That fortress is extremely heavily guarded. If anything were to go wrong--' Anise countered.
'You don't know my Jack,' Sam answered, remembering with pride all of the desperate situations they'd gotten out of before.
Eventually, Anise consented, 'If the plan is sufficiently executable, I will partake.'
"We'll do it," said Sam at last. After a mental nudge from her symbiote, she added, "But Anise wants to know the plan."
"I knew we could count on you," said Jack with a smile. "I'll sketch out the details if you've got any spare paper in those journals there," he said, indicating the stack that Sam had set down. Anise directed Sam to take the fourth from the top, and Sam handed it to Jack with a pen. Jack hopped down off of the bed, and laid the journal out on it. Flipping it open to the back, Jack set to work on the layout of Ba'al's fortress.
"Because he's set up shop on a planet without a charted 'gate, he doesn't keep it guarded. There are strong defenses, but they're not manned 24/7. It's sort of like his little hideout, and he only keeps a minimal staff. Now, the main entrance is watched, but I was able to slip out quietly enough through this back service entrance," he continued, circling a door in the southern face of the outer wall. He continued to amaze Sam with things like "I was able to" while referring to Kanan. "It's small and well hidden, so it's assumed it wouldn't be used as an enemy point of entry. This portion of the compound is all weapons labs. Prison cells are here, kitchens along this corridor, and here are the private chambers and such," he said, indicating an area close to the main entrance. "Shallan's got a room right next to Ba'al's, here. Once we're in, we should be able to hide out in this corridor until we get our opportunity. Then, it's just a race to the 'gate."
"We should probably wait until evening," said Sam. "With as few Tok'ra as there are on this base, there are even fewer wandering the hallways at night."
"Sounds good. Ba'al's planet's pretty much in synch with this one, so it should be close to dark there, too. And, fortunately, they don't guard the armory here," said Jack. "Zats should be no problem. We'll have to take care of the couple of folks standing guard at the 'gate on our end, but that shouldn't be difficult."
Sam looked over the diagram again. 'It is difficult for me to believe that I have agreed to this,' said Anise.
'Second thoughts?' asked Sam, worried that she might back out and spill the beans.
'I have committed to the secrecy of this operation at the least,' Anise assured her. 'And although it is contrary to my usual behavior, I will accompany Kanan on this mission.'
'Thank you,' said Sam sincerely.
"We're all on board," said Sam, realizing Jack was watching her.
"Excellent," he said. "Thanks, um, both of you."
Sam smiled. "Maybe we should see about that call home," she suggested.
"Let's do that," said Jack, closing the journal, and sticking it under his rather sparse pillow just in case. He followed Sam out of their room and toward the rings. In an undertone he added, "And we can make sure they haven't changed their defense strategy at the 'gate."
Sam picked up a Tok'ra communicator before they left. They didn't even have a GDO, let alone a radio. Sam figured the Tok'ra planned on taking them home using their own IDC. They took the rings to the surface, then made their way to the stargate. Two Tok'ra were in permanent, concealed positions flanking the 'gate. They greeted Sam and Jack as they approached, and allowed them to dial earth. Sam was mentally working out the best angle of approach to the 'gate for later that evening. The guards wouldn't be able to see the rings from where they were hidden.
They transmitted their message back to the SGC: that they were both fine, still recovering, but that they should be able to do without the symbiotes in a day or so. The only concern in that respect was that they were still looking for a host for Kanan, but they were hopeful one would be found soon. Jonas, Teal'c, and Hammond wished them well, and said they'd be looking forward to their next transmission. The call and 'gate recon successful, Sam and Jack turned back and headed for the rings again.
They spent the rest of the day roaming around the base, saying hello to familiar faces, and letting everyone know that they still had a good deal of recuperation ahead of them. Thoran, who was heading up the search for Kanan's new host, didn't have any encouraging news beyond the fact that he was still hopeful. Kanan assured his friend that he had every confidence in him. "And Colonel O'Neill has been a most patient host in the meantime," he said. "Of course, much of that, I believe, is due to Major Carter's influence and her previous experience."
Sam was wondering if she'd really helped Jack that much, when he turned to her after Thoran left. "Really, Sam, you've helped a lot," he told her quietly, as they entered the commissary for dinner. "I was all set to fight this every step of the way, at least on the surface," he said. "But seeing how calmly you dealt with it, even after what Jolinar had done, it let me give Kanan a chance."
She didn't really know what to say to that, so she just smiled as she took a plate of food from the stand. "You're welcome," she said at last, sitting down with him at their corner table.
--
Chaper 3
At the appropriate hour, Sam and Jack said goodnight to the nearby Tok'ra, and made as if to retire for the evening. Once the hallway seemed deserted, they headed straight for the armory. Sam kept a lookout, while Jack appropriated some Zats and, as it turned out, a couple of stun grenades. "Handy," Sam said as she stashed the weapons in her satchel.
They managed to get to the rings without running into anyone. Once on the surface, Sam took the left flank and Jack the right as they approached the 'gate. The guards were Zatted before they knew what hit them.
At a suggestion from Anise, Sam reached under her top. "We should probably leave these here, Jack," said Sam, removing her biosensor and tossing it aside. "No telling how detectable the signals would be."
"Good thinking," said Jack, following suit. He dialed the 'gate, and Sam tossed one of the grenades through, just for good measure. Jack held his Zat at the ready as he charged through the event horizon, and Sam followed him through.
It was close to midnight on the other side, but a couple of full moons gave them some light to steer by. Careful to stick to the shadows of the trees, they made their way quickly to the service entrance of the fortress. Sneaking through the deserted corridors seemed a cake walk, compared to other Goa'uld strongholds they'd encountered.
Soon enough, they were concealed in a hallway across from Shallan's quarters. Jack indicated for Sam to keep watch where she was, while Jack made his way to the door. He knocked quietly, making sure there was no one coming from either direction. At last the door opened. A young girl with short, blonde hair stood in the entryway. "Who are--" she began, but Jack quickly covered her mouth, and pulled her across the hall to Sam's hiding place.
Indicating for Shallan to keep quiet, Jack showed her he was putting away his Zat. Sam did the same. He slowly took his hand away from her mouth, satisfied that she'd hear him out. "Do not be afraid," said Jack with the affected voice of his symbiote. "It is I, Kanan."
Shallan backed away slightly, but then stilled. "Is it you?" she said at last, seeming to want to believe him.
"Yes, Shallan, I've come back for you."
"You look so different," she said; "how can you be Kanan?"
"You know of my true form," he explained, quickly and quietly. "My host was killed. Jack O'Neill has allowed me to bring him here in order to rescue you."
"You shouldn't have come back," Shallan replied with a glance toward Ba'al's chamber. "If I leave with you, he will know."
"That is why we must be quick," answered Kanan. "Will you come?" Shallan nodded. "Yes," she said, allowing him to help her to her feet.
Jack indicated for Sam to lead the way. She headed carefully back down the corridor toward the service entrance. They made it as far as the first stand of trees outside the wall, when an alarm sounded in the compound. "We must run," Kanan told Shallan.
They picked up the pace, but Sam soon realized she was pulling ahead. "Get to the 'gate and dial it up," Jack told her, as he helped Shallan along.
Sam did as she was instructed, keeping an eye out for Jaffa making their way to intercept her path. She heard Shallan, now further behind, panting, "It's too far. I can't."
"We shall wait here until the Chaapa'ai is activated," Kanan told her, pulling her into a small copse of trees. "Go!" he called to Sam.
Sam knew that they were making far too much noise to evade any patrols for long. Sure enough, as she ran out into the clearing and approached the DHD, she heard the all-too-familiar sound of Zatfire. Ducking behind the device, she saw a Jaffa fall stunned from Jack's shot. Scanning the area, she turned again to dial the coordinates for the P3X-234. She heard a couple of staff blasts behind her, but she guessed they were directed at Jack and Shallan. As soon as the 'gate was engaged, she turned back to their position. She saw Jack help Shallan to her feet, and they began running toward her. Sam saw a couple more Jaffa spring out from the cover of the trees, and took them out with her Zat before they could fire. She followed Jack and Shallan closely as they went through the 'gate, making sure to cover their backs.
Once through the 'gate, the trio made a quick U-turn, Sam dialing up the Tok'ra base now that there were no Jaffa to get the coordinates from the DHD.
As soon as they emerged on the other side, Jack and Sam raised their hands and dropped their Zats. The guards whom they'd knocked out were standing in front of the 'gate with six other Tok'ra, apparently summoned after their escape. All of them had Zats drawn and aimed at the travelers.
--
The three were led back down into the tunnels, and left in Sam and Jack's quarters with a guard at their door.
"Are we prisoners?" Shallan asked Kanan.
"No. We can simply expect to be questioned, before the other Tok'ra allow us to move about the base," Kanan answered her. Then, taking her hand, he told her, "You are free."
Shallan fell into his arms, hugging him fiercely as tears streamed down her face. "Thank you," she murmured into his shoulder.
Sam had a fleeting moment of curiosity as to how exactly Jack felt about Shallan. 'Do not fear, Samantha,' Anise said. 'I believe your assessment of Jack's nature was correct. It was his love for you and his commitment never to abandon you that inspired Kanan to risk Shallan's rescue. I expect Jack's feelings have been quite sharply highlighted, rather than becoming blurred with those of his symbiote.'
As Shallan left Jack's arms, Kanan spoke again. "You must understand something. I cannot remain in this host." Shallan looked confused. "Unless another can be found, I will most likely die," he said. Shallan began shaking her head in denial. "I cannot remain," he said again. "But I needed to see you free before I died. Now you have a chance to choose your own life. You need not be anyone's slave anymore."
"But I want to be with you," she said. "Could I not be your host?"
Kanan was silent. Sam was amazed at how quickly Shallan had come to that solution, recalling that for her, a blending had been a last resort. 'The Tau'ri have developed in a world that sets almost primary importance on independence,' observed Anise. 'For someone such as Shallan, who has known of the Goa'uld her entire life, and has fallen in love with a Tok'ra, the relationship with a symbiote such as Kanan does not hold as much dread.'
At last, Kanan spoke. "If it is truly what you wish, and if no other host is found, then I will accept this gladly," he said with a smile, taking her hand.
At that moment, Freya appeared at the entrance to their quarters. "You will all please follow me," she said. They were taken to an interrogation room, and questioned separately using the Zatarc detector. Sam, Jack, Anise, and Kanan all related the rationale leading up to their "mission," and described the events which took place on Ba'al's planet. Shallan affirmed her desire to join with the Tok'ra in their fight against the Goa'uld. Apparently satisfied, the council approved their release. Shallan was taken to some private accommodations, with Kanan's promise to see her soon. Jack and Sam returned to their own quarters.
'It is nearly time for me to leave you, Samantha,' Anise told Sam while she sat on her bed lost in thought.
'Giving me a clean bill of health, are you?' Sam asked.
'You are healed. . . in body,' she replied, 'but I am concerned for your heart and mind.' Sam knew what was coming. 'Will you make me a promise?' she asked.
'What promise?' asked Sam.
'That you will give Jack the opening he needs.' That was all she had to say. Sam knew exactly what was meant by it, and she knew just how hard it was going to be to confront him.
'I promise,' Sam answered. After a moment, she asked, 'Do I have to do it now?'
'I will allow you at least the courtesy of having your body back as your own first,' Anise replied.
'Thanks,' said Sam. 'So,' she continued, suddenly grinning at what she was steeling herself to do, 'where's Freya?'
'Eager, are we?' asked Anise.
'Maybe, just a little,' Sam answered, knowing that she was well on her way to giddy with anticipation.
At that moment, Thoran came to their room. "Kanan, may I speak with you?" he called from the doorway. Sam saw Jack emerge from his bedroom and meet him near the hallway. They spoke in hushed voices for a while, then Thoran placed his hand on Jack's shoulder and departed.
Jack turned and came to Sam's doorway, waiting for her to nod her permission for him to come in. "They found a host," he told her.
"That's great!" said Sam.
"Shallan's going to do it."
"Wow," Sam replied.
"Yeah," said Jack.
Sam decided then she didn't need to wait until Anise had left her. She'd take her chance now. "They really love each other, don't they?" she asked.
"They really do," Jack answered, "as weird as it seems for me to admit it about a snake."
She noticed that the animosity which normally accompanied "snake" was gone from his voice, and figured that Kanan had accepted the term good-naturedly. She thought fast, and tried to come up with a lead-in for what she was trying to say. "It seems more natural between a couple of humans?" she asked. As she'd hoped, he looked up at her and met her eyes.
"I guess so," he said, not breaking their eye contact.
"Jack, I--" she began haltingly. To her relief, she saw him take a step closer to where she sat, as he waited for her to continue. "I think I know what it was about you that convinced Kanan to go back for Shallan. And it wasn't as simple as 'no one gets left behind.'"
"You do?" he asked, moving still closer, but waiting for more from her before he said too much.
"Because you feel that way about. . . about me." She saw a hopeful look cross his face before it was replaced with one of self-reproach as his eyes fell. "And I feel the same for you," she added quickly. He looked back to her, apparently wondering if he'd heard her right. "I'm sorry I was so quick to suggest leaving our feelings in that room," she said, "and if it's alright with you, I'd like to see if maybe we can--"
A smile lit Jack's face, as he closed the distance and cut her off with his mouth on hers. Sam relaxed completely into him as his arms came around her. 'Yeah, that was definitely enough talking,' she thought, eagerly returning the kiss, and sliding her hands around his neck.
'I told you, if you would only allow him. . .," said Anise.
'Yes, you're very smart. Shut up,' Sam replied happily.
When they at last broke apart, Jack held her face, looking into her eyes. "We'll figure this out, I promise you," he said. "When we get back, I'll talk to Hammond. I'll make it work."
"We'll make it work, you mean," Sam corrected him.
"Definitely," he agreed, bringing her lips back to his.
--
TE
Story Notes: Author's Note: Thanks to Kat for the suggestion, and to Jess for the
awesome beta! Since this deals a lot with internal dialogue, I've
used 'single quotes' for thoughts, and "double quotes" for speech.
Copyright (c) 2006 SJ Author
awesome beta! Since this deals a lot with internal dialogue, I've
used 'single quotes' for thoughts, and "double quotes" for speech.
Copyright (c) 2006 SJ Author
DISCLAIMER: All publicly recognisable characters, settings, etc, are the property of their respective owners. Any original characters and plots are the property of the author. No money is being made from this work. No copyright infringement is intended. ... [ read more ]