" Where will I go, what will I do
It's so hard to imagine me without you
'Cause after the best, only the best will do
There'll never be another to take the place of you."
~ 'After the Best', Crystal Gayle.
~*~
Eight Months Ago.
~*~
The lights were low and soft music floated over to them from the stereo in the corner of the room. Sam Carter and Janet Fraiser, both Major's in the Air Force and Doctors in their own right, lounged together on the couch. Opened and empty bottles of wine and cartons of ice cream decorated the table in front of them, joining the stack of videos the women had watched earlier in the evening.
" That movie *never* gets old," Janet proclaimed with a dreamy smile on her lips. " I don't think I've ever watched it without getting teary-eyed at the end."
" I don't suppose Richard Gere starring in it has anything to do with your undying love for the movie, does it?" Sam responded slyly, opening one eye to gauge Janet's reaction.
Giggling girlishly, either because of the direction the conversation was heading in or because of the amount of wine that she had consumed, Janet sat up and smiled at her friend, a mischievous glint in her brown eyes. " Richard Gere doesn't do anything for me. Brad Pitt, however, is another story."
" Then why have we just watched three Richard Gere movies in a row?" Sam arched an eyebrow, looking slightly befuddled as the alcohol in her system caught up with her.
" Tonight was *your* night, Sam. A night of movies picked for you by me to cheer you up," Janet explained, sounding more than a little tipsy. " That didn't make sense, did it?" She asked in a wonder-tinged voice.
" What made you think I'd like Richard Gere over Brad Pitt?" Sam, struggling to sit up, was attempting to make sense of the conversation, suspecting she had drunk too much to make much sense of anything.
For some reason, Janet found the question to be highly amusing and started giggling again, her cheeks flushing a rosy pink colour. " I thought.." She managed to get out between bursts of laughter. " I thought.. because of the grey.." Janet covered her mouth with her hand in an attempt at muffling her giggles. With a few minutes and a curious stare from Sam, she was able to compose herself. " You know, since you go for the older man and all.."
" Excuse me?" Sam stared incredulously, fighting the deep blush she knew was rising up her cheeks. " The older man?"
" Yeah," Janet grinned and winked. " I distinctly remember you telling me that grey hair was sexy."
" No, I didn't!" Sam protested. " I *think* I said distinguished."
" Uh-huh. I believe you." The look Janet wore, however, contradicted her words. The sceptical look was soon replaced by another grin, one that was contagious as Sam found herself smiling back. Leaning in conspiratorially, even though they were the only two people in the house, Janet lowered her voice. " I think we're drunk."
Giggling but leaning in just the same, Sam whispered her reply. " I know we are. What are we gonna do about it?"
" Do we have to do anything?" Janet asked, twirling a strand of hair round her finger as she shifted and leaned against the back of the couch, closing her eyes. " We could.. you know.. talk. Since we're drunk and won't remember."
" Talk?" Sam was puzzled again. " I thought we were already talking."
" No, silly." Janet grinned but kept her eyes closed. " I meant *talk* talk. About men and stuff."
" 'Men and stuff'?" Sam repeated, imitating a child's voice before bursting into laughter again. " Geez, Janet. You make it sound like we're teenagers again, talking about something we're not supposed to."
" In a way.." Janet answered almost too quietly. " We are." She opened her eyes and looked at Sam sympathetically. " We're not supposed to be talking about Colonel O'Neill, are we?"
Becoming interested in the bottle of wine on the table in front of her, Sam lifted it up and started picking at the label, unsuccessfully trying to get her nails behind a corner of it so she could peel it off. " I didn't know that's what we were talking about," she murmured softly when she finally spoke up.
Noticing the slightly forlorn tone, Janet reached out and put a comforting hand on Sam's arm. " I'm sorry, Sam. I didn't mean to upset you."
" Don't worry about it." Forcing a smile, Sam looked up from the bottle she had been studying so intently. " It's not like you've got anything to do with it. You didn't create the regs or make me fall in lo--" Her voice trailed off and she swallowed the lump in her throat, a melancholic aura enveloping her as she realised what she had been about to say. It was the closest she'd ever come to admitting it, aloud at least. Even in the zaytark testing, both herself and the Colonel had avoided using the 'L' word, settling instead for substituting it with 'care' and 'a lot'. They both knew what they meant anyway, as did everyone else in the room. Feeling tears of humiliation at the memories and frustration at the whole situation sting her eyes, Sam decided they needed to change the subject. Clearing her voice, she closed her eyes and let her head fall back against the couch. " I have to be up for a debriefing first thing in the morning so maybe we should call it a night.."
" Yeah, we should." Janet agreed hurriedly, having seen the emotions flitter across her friends face. " But," she added cautiously, giving Sam's arm a squeeze. " We'll finish this conversation when you get back." At Sam's surprised and slightly worried expression, Janet smiled in a manner she hoped was encouraging. " It isn't healthy for you to keep bottling this up anymore than you already have to. When you get back from your next mission, you and I are going to talk. Seriously. About everything." A look of sheer determination crossed the petite doctor's face. " No matter what our relationship in the eyes of the military, you are still my best friend and always will be. You can talk to me about anything and it won't go any further than these four walls, I promise."
" I know." Sam gave her a grateful smile, pulling one of the two comforters from the back of the couch and offering one to Janet. " Thank you." The two women shared a moment of sisterly compassion as they smiled at each other, Sam out of gratitude and Janet in understanding. " When I get back, we'll talk about everything." Closing one eye but not the other, Sam couldn't stop the mischievous grin from tugging at the corner of her mouth. " Including what a certain Doctor said to you at the bar last week that got you all flustered.."
Blushing, Janet ducked her head, her face half-concealed by her comforter. " When you get back," her promise was muffled. " But not before."
Nodding, Sam allowed her both of her eyes to close as the comforting haze of slumber descended on her. She had a feeling they would have a lot to talk about in a few days when she got back. A whole lot.
But they didn't.
They didn't talk about everything and anything when SG-1 returned from their latest mission.
They didn't talk about it because Sam didn't come back.
~*~
Present Time
~*~
It's been eight months. Eight long months since we lost her, since she was taken from us, since I let her go. Thirty-two weeks since I last saw her smile or heard the barely restrained laughter in her voice as she tried to explain something to me when I was trying purposely to make her laugh.
We've been back to P6Y331 over five times, once with the Tok'ra for backup. That's the planet she disappeared on. Called Ryvernia or something like that. Why do these places never have *normal* names like Earth, Pluto, Mars..? Anyway, no one there knows where she is, or if they do, they're not in the mood to share. Not such a big surprise considering some of the threats we – well, I – made after finding Carter gone from her quarters.
Carter. Funny how I still call her that, even in my head. Guess it's because Sam is too personal. Carter is my second in command, Sam is the woman I lo--. The woman I'm not allowed to love.
There were rumours, of course, that we heard being whispered on the planet once news spread that one of the 'strangers' – that was SG-1 at the time – had gone missing. Apparently there's a planet that the Ryvernians trade with who often use woman as a form of payment. Unfortunately, since the Ryvernians see trading people as illegal, no one will admit to taking Carter there and no one's prepared to help us out a little by giving us the planet's address. All we know is the name: Belethia.
That's why I still do this. How I keep going.
In an unofficial capacity, SG-1 and all other SG-units are to keep an eye and ear open for any news on a planet called Belethia. It's no coincidence almost every mission SG-1 has been assigned to since Carter's kidnapping has been to one of the addresses Daniel managed to get out of the Ryvernians before we left the last time.
Eight months is how long we've been searching. I know it's only a matter of time before Hammond starts assigning us to other missions and other planets.
Life has gone on, as it usually does, but it's not the same. No one who knew Carter well has been the same – Daniel, Teal'c, Cassandra, Doc. Fraiser, even General Hammond and the lab techs Carter worked with regularly. Jacob, unsurprisingly, has been suffering from his daughter's disappearance. We heard from some other Tok'ra that he's accepted some pretty danger missions since Carter vanished. Sounds a lot like me when I think about it. A lot like the way I used to have for dealing with crap like this. The way I had before I met her.
" Colonel O'Neill?" The voice has a tinge of annoyance to it, giving the impression it's not the first time my name's been mentioned. I look up to see Gardam at the door, her expression matching her tone as she frowns at me.
" Captain Gardam?" I keep my tone even, belaying no hint of what I feel, putting the framed picture I was studying down on my desk to look like I've given her my full attention. Captain Andrea Gardam, Carter's replacement as of two months ago. She's a good officer but she's no Carter. A little shorter than Carter, brunette, with a lower patience threshold for Daniel's enthusiasm, no time for Teal'c and even less time for me unless I'm giving her an order. She fits in fine with a team that resents her being there.
" I've been knocking for ten minutes," she tells me exasperated, her narrowed eyes going to the back of the picture which I move away the moment I notice she's looking at it. Oh, yeah. That's another reason she doesn't fit in with SG-1 – she doesn't seem to care Carter's gone. I heard her ask Daniel why we didn't just get over it and move on; Daniel's answer was to glare and walk away. I think she got the point. " Colonel?" She snaps, somehow realising my mind's wandering again. Maybe she asked something? " You're not listening to me, are you?"
Highly observant, Captain. " Sorry, Gardam. What were you saying?"
" I was saying," she repeats, sighing and talking slowly as though she's talking to a three year old, " that General Hammond authorised the mission to P6Y731. He also said that this is the last mission SG-1 will be going on from the list of the coordinates given to Doctor Jackson from P6Y331 because Major Carter is now officially MIA."
" What?" My outburst seems to have taken her by surprise. Her eyes widen and she takes a step backwards as I stand up, my fists clenching at my sides as I bite down on the impulse to hit something. Really hard. " General Hammond said *what*?" 'And why do you sound so smug about it?' My mind adds scornfully.
" He's calling off the search," Gardam repeats. " It's using too many resources since none of the planets we've been to are of any use to us."
" Really?" There's a dangerous edge to my voice; I know and so does she, but I don't make any effort to curb it.
" Yes." She nods and turns; opening the door I didn't realise was closed. " I'm sorry, Colonel. I know it isn't what you want to hear but it's time to face facts."
With that she leaves, and it's a good thing since the cup I was drinking cold coffee out of smashes off the door, splintering over the spot she'd been standing in only a few moments earlier.
I stop pacing behind the desk and sit down, picking up the picture once again, tracing a finger along the worn path down the face that smiles up at me.
Hope is all that's kept me going and I'll be damned if I let go of it now.
Wherever you are, Carter, we're gonna find you.
No matter how long it takes.
~*~
Two blinding suns blazed in a purple sky. All four members of SG-1 immediately reached for their sunglasses, wincing at the bright glare that was reflected off the golden sand surrounding them. Squinting through the darkened lens, Jack stared out across the horizon, his hand resting casually on his gun.
" Which way should we go?" He spoke up, glancing at Captain Gardam when no one answered, noticing the young woman seemed more interested in tilting her head towards the suns at the right angle to catch the rays than in the mission. Swallowing his annoyance because he knew at least half of his anger wasn't directed at her, he glanced at the other members of his team. " Daniel? Teal'c?"
" I'm guessing we go West, Jack," Daniel spoke up gloomily, his head low as he was unable to work up any enthusiasm for the mission, the sweltering heat contributing to the already dark mood embracing all but one of the team.
" Why'd you say that?" Jack couldn't pretend he cared, he was just doing and saying what came automatically and it was clear to them all.
" Because that's the direction this trail is going in," Daniel answered matter-of-factly, pointing down at the tracks in the sand and rummaged around in the pocket of his jacket, managing to pull out a tissue just in time. " Plus the trees," he added in between sniffling, " might give us some shelter from the suns."
" I concur with Daniel-Jackson, O'Neill," Teal'c agreed, clutching his staff weapon in one hand. " Doctor Fraiser advised us to find shade as soon as we could."
" Alright, Campers. To the trees it is." Jack started walking before he had finished speaking, his mind preoccupied. He couldn't believe this was the last chance they had, the last planet they would be permitted to search for clues to Sam's whereabouts. He had tried to talk General Hammond out of it, using the General's own relationship with Sam and her father but it hadn't worked. Although the General was evidently reluctant to label Sam as being MIA, he had already held out long, delaying the inevitable because he'd wanted to believe SG-1 would bounce back as a complete unit, just like always. Eight months was a long time to wait, though. Too long for some.
Ten minutes later, they were talking through the forest when a noise from Daniel stopped them. Jack stopped walking and turned to face the archaeologist, signing when he realised Daniel had wandered off on his own. Cutting through the undergrowth, Jack started making up the distance between them. " What have I told you about wandering off without telling anyone?" His tone was that he would use when chiding a small child but it was lost on Daniel.
" Look!" Daniel acted as though he hadn't heard Jack speak at all. " I saw something through the trees so I thought I'd take a closer look." He continued enthusiastically, pointing at something Jack couldn't see clearly because of the tree branches blocking his line of vision. " It's a civilisation! It looks like a market town, the building structures look medieval but it has a modern feel to it.. There looks like there's some sort of.. auction.. going on. We should check it out, find out what this place is called.."
" ..And see if anyone's heard of a planet called Belethia," Jack's eyes lit up as he was caught up in Daniel's excitement. His eyes scoured the city and the area around it, searching for the safest and quickest route through the trees and sand dunes, down t the sandstone buildings. " Okay. If we continue the track, we should come out over there.," he mused, pointing into the distance at where the line of trees ended. " We should be able to pick up that path and head down to the city that way. The route looks pretty well established."
Daniel agreed and the men made their way back to their two other companions. Jack told Teal'c and Gardam the plan, barely managing to keep his eagerness in check as hope mingled with adrenaline and coursed through his veins. As soon as the words were out of his mouth and both Teal'c and Gardam had nodded their agreement, one with more interest that the other, Jack was on his way again, striding through the shade of the trees, trying half-heartedly to quell his anticipation. Daniel followed just as quickly, stumbling frequently but not letting it hinder his progress too much. Behind him, Teal'c walked behind Gardam, his own steady pace silently encouraging the unenthused Captain to keep up or risk being trampled on.
It was a good day, Teal'c decided as he walked on, constantly listening for any signs of approaching danger. He was always aware of his surroundings when they were on a mission, today was no different. Today, however, he had an instinct, a gut feeling.
It was a good day. It hadn't started as one but he was strangely confident that it would be one, in the end.
~*~
The market was bustling with life by the time SG-1 reached it, all feeling the strain of trekking underneath the burning heat. No one looked up as they approached, apparently accustomed to the arrival of strangers, everyone instead concentrating on bartering to get the best price they could. SG-1 stood observing for a few minutes as Daniel tried to pick up the language the stall owners were using, eventually leading Jack and the other over to a dealer who seemed to be speaking English through his heavily accented voice.
" Ah, hello?" Daniel spoke once the man had finished making a deal with a customer.
The man, short and balding, turned to stare at the newcomers, his beady grey eyes travelling from one to the other as a slow grin spread across his weather-worn face. " I bid you hello, my friends, and welcome to our city!" His voice was loud, in direct contrast to all the conversations going on around them. As if sensing they wanted something, the man leaned forward with a conspiratorial smile gracing his lips, a hand patting his round stomach as though he was pondering what he could get from them in trade. " I am Machupa, anything I have that you need I will happily trade."
" I'm Daniel, this is Jack, Teal'c and Captain Gardam," Daniel introduced them one by one. " We're looking for some information. About a planet called Belethia and a.. friend.. of ours who was taken there."
Machupa's eyes seemed to light up as he cautiously glanced about him. " Ahh, you have found Belethia, my friend." He leaned in closer and nodded animatedly. " I can give you the information you seek.. but we must first leave this place. It is too open." His voice dropped a decibel. " There are those who wish to keep the ways of the city a secret to outsiders, those who trade what does not belong to them."
" Like people?" Jack arched an eyebrow, taking a step forward. " If we showed you a picture of our missing friend, could you tell us if you've seen her?"
" If you make it worth my while, yes," Machupa grinned. " Come, come." He fumbled around on his stall, closing small trunks and turning keys in locks and turned away from it, leading SG-1 to one of the small huts surrounding them. " Come to my home and we can discuss this matter further."
With little to no hesitation, the team followed Machupa into a hut, Gardam's small exclamation of disgust on entering the dark, rancid home escaping no one's attention. Machupa, however, didn't seem insulted. Instead, he seemed amused, grinning to himself as he lit some of the candles around the single-roomed house, swinging open some of the window shutters, sending billows of dust everywhere.
" Forgive me," Machupa apologised as Daniel was overwhelmed by a fit of harsh sneezes. " Belethia has many storms of sand and dust. It is why we must keep the view-holes covered when we are elsewhere. Now." He sat down heavily on one of the two padded chairs that graced the small room, releasing another cloud of dust into the air. " Please, tell me what you have that I may be interested in."
" Before we do that," Daniel started, looking at Jack for confirmation, " we need to know if you have any information we want." He slid his backpack from his shoulders to the floor, gingerly sitting on the other chair. " We're looking for this woman.." He rummaged around in his pack, searching for the photograph of SG-1 taken a year ago, the one with Sam in that he'd carried around with him since she'd been taken. " It's in here somewhere.."
Shaking his head at Daniel, Jack unbuttoned the breast pocket of his shirt and pulled out his own picture, one few knew was kept there, and held it out for Machupa to see. " We're looking for the woman on the left, the blond one."
Peering over Jack's arm at the picture, Daniel felt a ghost of a smile grace his lips. The photograph had been taken at an off-base gathering for all personnel, just a few months before Sam had disappeared. Sergeant Davis had been put in charge of taking the photos at the bar and just after one of SG-1 had been taken, something had happened - Daniel couldn't remember what, he vaguely remembered an exchange that had taken place between Jack and Teal'c – and whatever it was had made Sam giggle and Daniel, having drank a lot, found her laughter contagious and laughed so much he tripped over his own foot, which amused Jack and started him laughing, too. The picture captured the moment perfectly, Sam was obviously trying not to giggle, Teal'c was trying to help Daniel to his feet and Jack.. Daniel grinned wider at the picture. Jack had his arm around Sam – he had claimed it was to support her and stop her from joining Daniel on the floor but that was just one explanation.
" She is very beautiful," Machupa commented, something akin to recognition lighting his face. " Her colouring is rare, she would not be easily forgotten."
" Have you seen her?" Jack pressed, his fingers unconsciously tightening around the photograph though he was careful not to damage it.
" I believe I have." Machupa looked up and met Jack's hopeful eyes, his expression one of sympathy. " She means a great deal to you."
" She means a lot to us all," Daniel cut in as Jack withdrew the picture and replaced it carefully in his pocket, making sure it was secure. " Are you absolutely sure it was Sam you saw?"
Machupa nodded, his eyes grim. " I believe your friend was brought here many moon cycles ago, from the trading planet of Ryvernia." His voice grew nervous as his hand gestures became wary. " Most of us disapprove of the practise of trading possessions that do not belong to us. We have values created by our ancestors, we trade what we own. Some of us.. Some do not believe in those ways. They will do anything to gain wealth and riches, including kidnapping women such as your friend and selling them in secret transactions." Machupa sighed and shook his head, seemingly disgusted at what he was saying. " I recognise your friend as being one of those brought here by Astrone, a renowned dealer from Ryvernia."
" Astrone was the name of Ryvernian who escorted us around Ryvernia on our first visit, was it not?" Teal'c asked, an eyebrow rising.
" Yeah, it was." Jack ground his teeth together as his eyes narrowed. " Damn it, I knew he was looking at her funny!"
" You couldn't have known, Jack," Daniel murmured soothingly, turning his attention back to Machupa. " Machupa, how much information do you have on where Sam is now?"
Machupa leaned back in his chair and ran a hand over his face. " I know those who were interested in purchasing her from Astrone. I can give you the names of the places she may have been taken to."
" Just the names or the addresses as well?" Daniel was perched on the edge of his seat, his interest well and truly caught. He noticed the merchant's confusion at the term 'address' and hurriedly pulled his notepad from the pocket of his pack, scribbling down the stargate address of Belethia. " This, this is the address of your planet. Can you tell us the symbols of the places Sam might be?"
" The seven symbols, yes," Machupa nodded enthusiastically. " I can give you those and the names that belong with them."
" Excuse me." It was Gardam, her tone sharp and cool. " This is all fine and dandy but you've yet to tell us what you want in return for this information. What if your price is too high for us?"
Machupa smiled at her. " Young lady, I don't think your colleagues would list any price too high for the return of this woman. She is important to them if not to you. However," his attention returned to Daniel, Jack and Teal'c. " We have not discussed a price.." He looked from one expectant face to the other and smiled indulgently. " I will offer you this information in exchange for those eye-covers you were wearing."
" These?" Jack held up his pair of sunglasses. " All you want are our sunglasses?"
" Yes." Machupa nodded enthusiastically. " They will sell well, I think, and I can use their design to make more."
" Well.." Daniel unclipped the darkened lens from the front of his normal glasses. " I can give you this part but I need the other section to see.."
" Fine, fine," Machupa beamed and held out his hand, taking the lens from Daniel and the sunglasses Jack offered to him. Teal'c followed suit but Gardam remained with her arms crossed defiantly across her chest.
Jack crossed his arms and stared at her sternly. " Captain Gardam, give the man your sunglasses."
Gardam opened her mouth to protest but Machupa interrupted, holding up a hand. " I do not require her.. 'sunglasses'.. I would not accept them." He carefully put the others to one side. " Now, if you will lend me your paper, I will write down the seven symbols you require to find your friend."
Daniel wasted no time in handing over the notepad, watching intently as Machupa wrote down the symbols and carefully spelt out some names of the planets. It took just under ten minutes for Machupa to write down all four destinations and SG-1 were soon on their way back to the Stargate, feeling light-headed and light-hearted at the new-found information.
Teal'c led the way, with Daniel talking rapidly beside him about the possibility of finding Sam within the week. Gardam walked behind them, a permanent scowl arranging her features. Jack brought up the rear, his head spinning. They had the clue they'd wanted, the information they needed to buy a little more time. It was possible they would find Sam, it was no longer just a dream..
Something bothered him, though. He didn't think it was Gardam's determination to put a damper on their excitement, although that did anger him to some extent. He thought he knew why she did it, though. If – when – Sam was found, Gardam would no longer have a place on SG-1. Sam would be back in her rightful position, where she belonged, and Gardam would be put on another team – if she was lucky. But still.. Jack couldn't understand her complete disregard for Sam's well being, though. It was drilled into soldiers to trust and protect their colleagues – Jack, in particular, had a great sense of commitment to all those who served beside him, even those he didn't know. Gardam, however, didn't seem to care for anyone other than herself, and a good soldier, in Jack's eyes, couldn't be that self-centred
Shaking his head, Jack picked up the pace a little when he realised his thoughts were causing him to fall behind his team mates. The two suns were slowly sinking in the sky, which was turning a deeper, redder shade of purple. As Jack took the steps up to the active Stargate, he cast an appreciative glance over to the setting suns, allowing some of the tension that had plagued him earlier in the day to leave, telling himself they were one step closer to Sam.
One step closer to bringing her home.
~*~
"And where are you now, now that I need you?
Tears on my pillow wherever you go
I'll cry me a river that leads to your ocean
You never see me fall apart, In the words of a broken heart
Its just emotion that's taken me over, Caught up in sorrow, lost in my soul
But if you don't come back; Come home to me, darling.
Don't you know there's nobody left in this world to hold me tight
Don't you know there's nobody left in this world to kiss goodnight."
~ 'Emotion', Destiny's Child/Bee Gees.
~*~
~*~
Part Two
~*~
" Somewhere I know you'll be with me,
Someday in another time,
But right now you're gone,
You just vanished away,
But I'll never leave you behind."
~ 'Never Forget You', Mariah Carey
~*~
Velenthia, the grand city named after the beautiful planet. A planet famed throughout its 'sister' planets with which it traded for having wonderful blue skies, white fluffy clouds and one brightly burning golden sun. Of course, it wasn't sunshine all year round. It's weather pattern was similar to that of another planet many light years away – rain and winds and snow and sun were all common elements – but, to many of its visitors who came from planets that were either one extreme or another, it was an unusual and attractive feature that brought them back to Velenthia time and time again.
Asides from being attractive to strangers, Velenthia was also home to many; Nicholi Kavise and his family just a handful of them.
The Kavise family weren't the richest or the most respected family in Velenthia but they were happy with their position in the social circle as it stood. They were higher up than the lowest classes, above them because they had never resorted to begging or thieving and worked honourably and hard for all they had. They would never be summoned, though, to attend an audience with royalty but nor did they expect it. They weren't born with money and couldn't afford the luxuries to give them anything in common with the Lords and Ladies but they had enough to live on and were happy with their relatively simple existence.
Nicholi was the youngest of three brothers and two sisters. His siblings had all left the family home to start lives of their own throughout the city of Velenthia and in the other towns and villages scattered on the outskirts of the city. His parents were in no rush for their youngest to leave home and Nicholi was grateful to them for understanding that he wanted to earn enough money to support himself before leaving. His father had helped Nicholi find a job within the palace as on of the kitchen assistants, helping the royal cook to prepare the meals for the King and his guests.
The palace was where he'd met her, his reason for wanting to save as much money as he could. His parents saw it as a harmless infatuation, a regular occurrence in young men of nineteen life cycles. Nicholi knew better than that. The moment he'd lay his eyes on her, he knew. She was the one. And when she'd looked at him and smiled her sweet, innocent smile, he knew she felt the same.
There was only one problem with the blossoming romance: her status within Velenthia's society would not permit her to marry. Evelyn, despite being only seventeen life cycles old, was a born and bred courtesan, and because of that, her life was not her own. She, as did all courtesans of Velenthia, belonged to the King.
Courtesans were revered. Their beauty and status allowed them access to area women were usually forbidden from going such as libraries, making them the best-educated women in all of Velenthia. They were women men of all ages and walks of life desired and wanted to be seen with on their arm. Even some women – those who didn't feel threatened by them, usually the less wealthy – admired the courtesans for their beauty and wit and some envied the freedom and luxuries of the life a courtesan lived.
Until recently, courtesans of Velenthia owned the homes they lives in and chose whose offers to accept whose to refuse. That had changed after a popular and well-known courtesan was brutally murdered by a jealous lover. The Queen at the time, who had been raised from birth by a courtesan, had made the decision that something had to be done to protect all courtesans of the city and keep the business of courtesans as civilised as it could be. Even after the Queen's death, the King of Velenthia had honoured his late wife's wishes and opened the doors of the palace to the courtesans of his Kingdom, offering them safety and comfort within the walls of his home on the condition that he owned them and decided who they tended to and when.
Most courtesans had accepted the offer and those that hadn't soon found themselves out of work. Now, all courtesans worked through the palace and any new potential courtesans were 'purchased' by the King's advisors – whomever was seen to own the young woman in question would received
payment in exchange for the ownership. The young woman would be taken to the King's palace, where the King would meet her and decide whether she was fit to be a courtesan or whether she would be better suited to another position in the palace – either as a maid, a server, an assistant to the cook or an assistant to the other courtesans.. Those who were deemed unsuitable for the role of courtesan would fill any position suitable for a woman.
The new way of ruling things benefited the courtesans as they were well looked after, clothed in expensive materials in the most intricate of designs, fed with food fit for a king and given their own private chambers within the palace. Unfortunately for Nicholi and Evelyn, her being property of the King prevented them from being able to have a real relationship and made the chance of marriage very slim unless Nicholi could offer the King enough money to 'buy' her or trade something of value so that Evelyn could go free.
" Nicholi! Nicholi," it was his mother, Bernadette Kavise. Nicholi turned to find the warm face of his mother smiling down on him from the doorway to his room. A strand of mousy brown hair escaped from her braid and tickled her nose so Bernadette pushed it away from her rosy cheeks with a work-worn hand. " Your father has been calling for you, my son. You will be late if you do not depart for the palace soon."
" Thank you, Ma." Nicholi closed the book he was reading and stood, straightening his tall, thin frame. He walked over to her and leaned down to brush her cheek with his lips, their brown eyes meeting as he pulled back and she reached up to pat his olive-skinned cheek, her eyes glowing with pride. " Ma.."
" You are a fine young man, Nicholi," Bernadette told him sincerely. " You will make a fine husband one day."
" Ma.." Nicholi took her hand in his and held it. " We've talked about this.. If I marry.. *When* I marry, it'll be to Evelyn."
" Evelyn is a lovely girl, Nicholi," Bernadette soothed, " I did not say that it would not be her you marry. She will make you a good wife if you get the chance to wed."
Nicholi grinned boyishly and kissed her hand, dropping it as he walked past her casually, though with a look of determination on his face. " Not if, Ma. *When*. Evie and I will get married, even if I have to work every sun-cycle for the next ten life cycles to get there. We *will* be married."
Bernadette followed her son through the house, shaking her head. Although she had nothing against Evelyn, she knew it was unlikely her son would ever raise enough to free the young woman from the role she had been born for and although it was a mother's instinct to protect and help her young, Bernadette felt helpless that there was nothing she could do. " My son.." She leaned against the doorway of the house, watching as Nicholi turned to face her, squinting in the light of the sun. " You know if your father and I could help you, we would."
" I know, Ma." Nicholi smiled affectionately at her. " I know you and Father would help me and Evie if you could. I know she appreciates your supporting our relationship, neither of us expect anything more from you than that." He looked up at the sky, scrutinizing the position of the sun. " Father's right, I will be late."
" Cut through the forest," Bernadette advised, eager for her son to get to work on time, fearing what would happen if he was late. The last thing Nicholi needed was to loose his income and all hope he had of ever getting to be with Evelyn. " Keep to the paths!" She called after him. " And be careful!"
Nicholi's answer was to wave with one hand as he walked away from the house and into the scattering of trees that acted as a thin wall between his home and the main streets of Velenthia. Bernadette watched until he was out of sight, before turning and heading back to her kitchen where she would start to prepare the evening meal for her husband and youngest child.
~*~
No one here understands how I feel. They miss her, sure, but they can't know what it's like for me. What it's like to always be the one sitting on the sidelines, waiting for someone to bring back a little piece of new information on where she is. Always waiting. It's like a hunger, a craving. One that's never satisfied with what I get.
It's different for the rest of them, for SG-1. I know they miss her as much as I do, possibly even more, but at least they have the option of going out there and finding her. I don't. I don't have the luxury of leaving the base through the Stargate every few days, embarking on a new mission, embarking on the mission that could be the one that brings her back to us. No. I don't have that freedom. All I can do is sit in the infirmary, tend to the patients who need me, and wait.
Waiting isn't easy when it's your best friend who's missing.
Since moving to Colorado and divorcing my husband, I've made many friends, both male and female. Out of all of them, Sam was the one I got closest to, the only person I felt I could open up to and be myself around. Over four years of knowing each other, she became the best friend I've ever had, as close to me as anyone could be. We became as close as the sisters we never had.
I never realised how much I depended on her until that day when SG-1 came back, all three members looking confused and scared and Colonel O'Neill looking angry enough to kill. From what I read in Doctor Jackson's reports, he came close to it on the planet, only the intervention of Teal'c stopped him. For two months after she disappeared, we were all in denial. It wasn't until Hammond assigned Captain Gardam to the team that it sunk in that Sam was gone. For the time being, anyway. I have to believe she'll come back. I have to.
It's the little things about her that I miss the most. The ones that were unique to Sam, the ones no one else on base has or does. The way she'd come to my office after her mission debriefing so we could share gossip, with me telling Sam what she'd missed while away and with her filling me in on what had happened on her mission, giving me all the details left out from the reports, describing everything in a way that made me feel like I'd been there, helping me feel a little less left out. Only Sam understood that, only Sam realised how much I wanted to be out there exploring new worlds with them. And it was only Sam who did something to make me feel better for not being able to.
I miss the way she'd tease me mercilessly when I made a slip-up and said something I shouldn't about a patient. I miss the way I could reach for the phone at 2am in the morning – if she wasn't on a mission - and call her for a chat, knowing she wouldn't get angry with me disturbing her sleep. Knowing she would listen to whatever I had to say, give me the best advice she could and finish with something that would make me laugh and feel better about myself. I miss knowing she's always there for me when I need a second opinion, whether it's about what to wear on a girl's night out or something more serious concerning Cassandra.
Cassandra. She's been affected by this, too, and I can't really say I'm surprised. After all, Sam was the first person she connected with. There are times when I think Cassandra has two mothers – Sam, and me. Now she only has one of us and it doesn't seem like enough. To be completely happy, Cassandra needs us both. She needs me to be the Mom she lives with, the one who takes her and her friends out to places and picks them up, the one she talks to about school and trouble with her friends. Then she needs Sam, the Favourite-Aunt-come-Godmother-come-Mom. The one she talks to about boys, the one who helps her with the science and maths aspect of her homework, – unless it's biology - the one she would go to for advice when she couldn't talk to me. Every teenager should have a second 'Mom' figure in their life because there is always a time when they feel they need someone to talk to and can't go to their Moms.
I think Cassandra was hoping, as were the rest of us, that this would just be a temporary setback, another one of SG-1's infamous close calls. For about three months after Captain Gardam had been assigned to the team, we all still wanted to believe that, to think that Sam would show up one day as mysteriously as she'd disappeared. It didn't happen. Six months after Gardam took her place and we're still waiting. Well, Gardam took her place on paper, nowhere else.
" Doctor Fraiser? Janet?" I look up to find Doctor Jackson standing in the doorway to my office. " Are you okay?"
" Fine." My smile is forced and we both know it. Over the years, I've come to know Daniel quite well and vice-versa – after all, he's spent enough time in my company as a patient for us to find something to talk about. Since Sam disappeared, we've spent more time together – both just the two of us and with Cassandra and the rest of SG-1 minus Gardam. Instead of having lunch in the commissary with Sam, we have lunch together and often end up talking long into the afternoon about nothing and everything. It's nice, but it's not the same. " Just a little distracted. Was there something I could do for you..?"
" SG-1's going to be leaving in a few minutes for one of the planets on the list we got," Daniel explains, his eyes alight with excitement, something that's been absent in recent months. " I came to get some allergy tablets in case there's a lot of pollen there.. And you did say you wanted to know when we'd be leaving.."
" Yeah, I did. Thanks." I get to my feet and lead him out of my office to the main area of the infirmary. " How likely do you think it is you'll find Sam?" I ask, needing reassurance that it's not just a pipedream she'll be back someday, needing to hear someone usually capable of rational thinking tell me the truth.
" Well, there's always the chance that she'll have moved on but this is the first real lead we've had and I know how much I want it to be successful," Daniel answered, his tone thoughtful. " General Hammond's sent other teams to all of the other coordinates so we'll find out if she's there, and Machupa – that guy on Belethia – seemed pretty sure that Sam would be on one of the planets. I got the impression whoever 'bought' her was making a long-term investment."
" Here, take one of these every six hours," I say, handing him a packet of his usual tablets. Finally, we seem to have found a brand that work. I swear, that man has more allergies than anyone else I know. I look up and meet his eyes. " Good luck, Doctor Jackson. And bring her home."
He smiles at that and his fingers brush mine as he takes the packet. " If we can, we will. Jack isn't going to let any of us leave that planet if she's there until she's leaving with us."
" He's still blaming himself for letting her out of his sight?" The Colonel's tendency for self-blame and guilt is as legendry throughout the halls of the SGC as the man himself is. No one was really surprised when he made a public show of disagreeing with General Hammond over
abandoning the search.
" Yeah," Daniel sighs heavily, closing his weary eyes momentarily, allowing me the chance to study him without being noticed. There are lines on his face that weren't there months before, lines of stress and tension. Daniel, like most of us, has aged overnight. He opens his eyes, putting an end to my scrutiny and looks at me as helplessly as I feel. " He blames himself for making the same mistake he thinks he made on Simarka when she was taken, especially since he mentioned when we were there that he didn't like the way that Astrone guy was looking at her."
" If Sam couldn't have protected herself against whoever took her, I doubt Colonel O'Neill could have." A small smile tugs at my lips as I remember Sam coming to see me, furious, because someone had insinuated she couldn't look after herself as well as one of the other male members of the SGC teams could. The smile grows as I remember the solider in question coming to the infirmary a few days later because someone had broken his nose in a friendly fight in the gym. I never did get Sam to tell me whether she was the one he'd been fighting. " Wherever she is, she'll be looking after herself as well as she can."
" I know she will," Daniel murmurs, smiling slightly in return, no doubt remembering some other time Sam's proven herself. " We're counting on it."
In silence, I accompany him in the direction of the Gateroom, pausing at the stairs that led into the control room. " Have a safe trip, Daniel. And try and make sure you *all* come back, okay?"
" I will," he nods solemnly. " I promise."
I start walking up the stairs, pausing and turning when I feel eyes on my back. He smiles and waves, then walks away and out of sight until I'm up in the control room and can see him talking to Colonel O'Neill and Teal'c through the glass of the window. Captain Gardam, still very much an outsider, stands a little to the side of the three men who are looking more animated than I've seen them in a long time.
Here I am, back to waiting again. As helpless I feel, I know it's the only thing I can do. Watch the clock and wait for them to come back, praying they'll all be well and healthy and, this time, pray that they'll bring the *real* fourth member of SG-1 back with them.
" It's hard, isn't it?" The voice at my shoulder startles me and I turn to see General Hammond standing there, watching his flagship team head through the stargate. " It's at times like this I wish I could do something more, that I could go out there with them." I say nothing but nod in understanding, trying to figure out why he's telling me this. As if sensing my thoughts, General Hammond looks at me fully, his eyes troubled. " You do good work, Doctor. What you do, it's important. Even if you can't be out there looking for her, she'll know it's what you want."
Nodding because I don't trust myself to speak, I find I have to wait a few seconds and clear my throat before attempting to return the sentiment. " Thank you, Sir. I'm sure Sam knows, wherever she is, that you don't want to give up on her, that you're doing all you can. I know.." I falter at the flash of pain in his eyes, realising how hard it is for him, losing someone he thinks of as a daughter and having no choice but to call off the search no matter how much he wants to keep going. " We all know you've done all you can, and would do the same for any of them."
It's General Hammond's turn to nod in response before he excuses himself and heads to his office. Moments later, I follow his example and head back to mine, knowing instinctively that although we're in different positions, doing different things, we're each helping in the only ways we can. Knowing we're in the same position now, both of us, back to sitting in our offices and waiting, waiting for a missing friend to come home.
~*~
" Trees, trees and more trees! What a surprise!" Jack drawled as he stepped out of the Stargate only to find the same picture he'd seen transmitted by the MALP – dozens of tall, green, leafy trees surrounding the gate.
" What were you expecting, Jack? To find the trees on the MALP telemetry were just a trick of the light?" Daniel retorted though a tolerant smile belayed the harshness of his words.
Refusing to comment, Jack shot the anthropologist a look and started surveying the area around them. " Hate to sound like a broken record but which way should we go, Campers?"
" We could split up," Daniel suggested a little timidly, not knowing how much Jack would like the idea. It hadn't been a problem when Sam had been with them but he wasn't sure how much any of them – himself, Jack and even Teal'c – would like being alone with Gardam. " That way we could cover both directions," he continued as the others looked at him. " And we could radio if we found anything or got into trouble.."
There was a short pause as Jack sighed in resignation. " Fine. Daniel and Gardam head West; Teal'c and me head East. We'll check in with each other regularly. Every forty minutes," he added, sending a sharp glance in Gardam's direction as she rolled her eyes at the order. " Everyone clear on that?"
" Yes, Sir." Gardam sent him a sweet smile, taking him by surprise as he narrowed his eyes suspiciously at her. Daniel and Teal'c mimicked the sentiment and the group went their separate ways, with Daniel looking reluctant for the first time since the missions started, sending Jack a 'thanks for nothing' glare.
" It appears Daniel-Jackson is not pleased with your decision, O'Neill," Teal'c commented as they started walking in the opposite direction to their team mates.
" Until he's in charge, he'll just have to live with it," Jack responded good-naturedly, unable to stop the small grin from curling up the corners of his mouth as he pictured the startled expression of alarm Daniel had adopted as he'd given the team his orders. " You've got to feel sorry for the guy, though. He doesn't get on brilliantly with Gardam, does he?"
" I do not believe any of us do," Teal'c replied evenly, keeping his pace slow but steady. " Captain Gardam has not yet been accepted within the SGC or SG-1. I believe it is because people see her as a replacement for Major Carter and feel resentment towards Captain Gardam for being here."
Letting the Jaffa's statement sink in, Jack walked a few steps in silence. " I don't resent Gardam," he eventually answered, his words careful. " I don't see her as a replacement for Sa-Major Carter. I could never.. I think seeing Gardam where Carter should be just reminds us all of what's missing and that's why none of us have warmed to her. Then again," he shot Teal'c a curious glance. " There is something about Gardam that.. irritates.. me. And I know Daniel feels the same way."
" Captain Gardam is not Major Carter," Teal'c stated bluntly. " She does not join us when we are not on a mission nor have we ever, as I recall, asked her to. She does not.. care.. to follow your orders without question as Major Carter did. Captain Gardam is not as dedicated to her work and her colleagues as Major Carter was."
" And then some," Jack murmured, continuing his journey through the trees. " Do you think.. You think we'll find her, Teal'c? Honestly?"
Teal'c stopped walking and started at the back of his Commanding Officer and friend. He was well aware of the Colonel's feelings towards the Major so the change of conversation and soft, serious tone of voice came as no surprise to him. What had surprised him was that it had taken this long for Jack to say anything. " I believe we will find Major Carter someday, O'Neill. She is a resourceful, strong, intelligent woman with the ability to survive in conditions a Jaffa warrior could not. If we do not find her, she will find us."
" What if she can't?" Jack asked in a low, pained voice. " What if she's already.. If something's happened to her?"
" If that were so you would know it." Teal'c approached the younger man and put a soothing hand on his shoulder. " If Major Carter were no longer alive, you would feel her absence more than you do now."
" That's a highly romantic ideal, Teal'c," Jack grinned, lightening the mood with humour though appreciation shone in his eyes. " Just wait till the guys on base here about this.. A romanticising Jaffa.."
Teal'c's lips twitched in a small smile as Jack walked ahead of him. " You are welcome, O'Neill," he spoke softly, knowing a teasing comment was as close to a 'thank you' as Jack would or could get in these circumstances. Eyeing the area around them, Teal'c continued on, following his friend, hoping he was right and that Major Carter was alive and well and waiting for them to find her.
~*~
Two minutes before check-in time, Jack's radio crackled and Daniel's familiar voice came over the airwaves. " Jack? Teal'c? Can you guys hear me? We've found a city!"
" We read you, Daniel," Jack unclipped his radio and brought it to his mouth. " Loud and clear. What's your position?"
" Umm." Daniel paused and for a moment Jack was deafened by static. " We're.. umm.. about one and a half miles West of the Stargate. Jack, this place is amazing! It looks like 15th century Europe! The style of the buildings and from what we can see, the clothing.. It's amazing! You should see this place!"
Shaking his head at the enthusiasm he could hear in Daniel's voice, Jack couldn't help but smile, having missed the sound of a hyperactive archaeologist no matter how much he'd deny it in a court of law. " We will, Daniel, but look up for a minute, will ya? We need to find some shelter."
For the first time since arriving on the outskirts of the magnificent city, both Daniel and Gardam tore their eyes away from the beautiful buildings and up to the sky, seeing the threatening black clouds looming above of them.
" We could try and find someone in the city who'll give us a place to stay.." Daniel suggested, speaking into the radio in his hand.
" If I may.." The voice, unfamiliar but gentle, took Daniel by surprise, making him jump and drop his radio. He turned to find an olive-skinned young boy with bright eyes smiling at him warmly. " I did not mean to startle you, forgive me."
" That's.. okay.. Yeah. It's okay," Daniel murmured, bending to pick up the dropped radio as Gardam approached the newcomer, watching him warily.
" Who are you?" Gardam demanded, her eyes narrowing as she took in the peasant style of his clothing, tightening her grip on her gun as she wondered if he was some sort of thief.
The stranger once again smiled and bowed slightly. " My name is Nicholi, I live here in Velenthia. If you need shelter from the storm, my family would gladly offer it."
" Daniel? Doctor Jackson?" The voice emitted from the radio in Daniel's hand and startled Nicholi as he took a step back. " Are you reading me?"
" I'm here, Jack," Daniel answered hurriedly; giving the young boy what he hoped was a reassuring smile. " Just got startled for a moment there. Looks like we've made a friend. I'll get back to you in a minute." With that, he turned the radio off and focused on Nicholi. " I'm Daniel Jackson, this is Captain Gardam." He broke off as the first drops of rain started falling, large and heavy, knowing they would all be drenched within a matter of minutes. " We have two other companions, in the woods. Would your family be able to offer shelter to them too?"
" Of course," Nicholi looked proud. " My home is through the woods, we can join your companions on the way. We must past the Stargate to get to my house."
" Thank you." Daniel nodded and lifted the radio again, shivering as a drop of rain made it's way down his neck. " Jack? Teal'c? You guys still getting this?"
Crackling was what he heard for a few brief seconds and then Jack's voice, slightly distorted by interference from the storm brewing above. " We read you. What's going on?"
" I think we've found a place to stay for the night," Daniel answered, raising his voice to be heard over the sounds of static. " Stay where you are or head back to the Gate. We have to go past the Gate to get to.. er.. Nicholi's house."
" Nicholi?" Jack repeated. Daniel could hear the sounds of a muffled conversation between Jack and Teal'c and then heard Jack sigh. " We'll head back to the Gate now. Be careful."
Knowing Jack couldn't see him, Daniel rolled his eyes and nodded. " We will. Over and out." As the radio in his hand fell silent, he clipped it back in place and turned to Nicholi. " Please, lead the way."
Nicholi once again bowed slightly and started walking hurriedly through the trees, the leaves of which offered a small amount of shelter from the heavily falling rain. " My parents will welcome you and your friends," he said, answering the unasked question in Daniel's mind. " There is plenty of room in our home since my brothers and sisters left."
They walked hastily through the rain in silence for a while, the only sounds being that of the raindrops hitting the leaves on the way down. It was Captain Gardam who voiced the other question on Daniel's mind, the woman having to shout to be heard over the winds that were rapidly increasing in strength and volume. " Have your people always called the Stargate a Stargate?"
Nicholi turned his head slightly towards them without changing his speed, a fond smile on his face as he answered the question. " Our people call it a Ring of Stone. A friend who arrived here a few moon-cycles ago calls it a Stargate."
Before Daniel or Gardam could pursue the topic further, they met up with an equally drenched Jack and Teal'c. " This your friend, Daniel?" Jack called out above the rain and winds.
" This is Nicholi, he's taking us to his home. Nicholi, this is Colonel Jack O'Neill and Teal'c, our companions." The introductions were made whilst the five-some continued almost running through the rain. Nicholi just smiled and nodded in acknowledgment, picking up the pace, knowing his mother would be worried about him.
Twenty minutes later, five soaked people arrived at a medium sized house placed in the middle of nowhere. Bernadette Kavise asked no questions about the four extra people who graced her with their presence, instead ushering them all into her home and away from the storm, relieved her son was home safely and unable to find it in her heart to deny his new found companions warmth and shelter.
Brief introductions were made as Bernadette and her husband, Torin, found dry clothes for the strangers to wear and shared what little food they had prepared between the seven of them. After Bernadette was satisfied her guests were taken care of, she showed them to their rooms and bid them a goodnight. SG-1, though slightly taken back by the generosity and lack of questions, weren't going to object, each of them finding comfort on the soft beds they were given, all but two of them drifting to sleep immediately.
Teal'c practised Kel'No'Reem as Jack paced the small space of his room. He eventually ended up sitting by the window, staring out at the blurred world through the rain-streaked glass, wondering if this was it, if this was where she was. Wondering if she was out there, somewhere.
~*~
Rain. Pounding rain. Not the soft, warm kind often found during the summer months on Earth. Not the kind you can stand outside in and dance with loved ones when you're young or carefree. Cold, harsh, bitter, unrelenting rain.
That was the first thing she'd noticed about her new home. Compared to the heat of Belethia, however, the first planet she'd found herself on, the rain was a welcome respite. It was strangely comforting, in a way, as it pounded on the thin glass pane of the window, driven by the fierce wind that accompanied it. On nights like this, if she was permitted, she would lie on her soft mattress, face turned towards the window, the only light in the room being emitted from the open fire in the ornate fireplace.
She closed her eyes on nights like this, listening to the rain, the warmth of the fire soothing on her skin as she lay atop the blankets, and dreamt of home.
Home.
A place she hadn't been in months. A distant fantasy she had no hope of ever returning to. A far-off land that hadn't seemed so wonderful at the time but one that was home not only to herself but to the owners of the faces she saw every night in her dreams.
She'd never truly appreciated it before.
Never thought about its simple, natural, untouched beauty nor the wonderments created by her own people through time. She'd never realised how civilised life was there, how.. open-minded the people were. How fair it was. Sure, if you were female, you had to work a little harder in some professional fields. The same could have been said for men in some professions.. But at least at home you had the opportunity. You had the chance.
Here, she didn't. Her new planet – it would never be home – was so different. Her status was different. It was, in many ways, one she would have deemed immoral, demeaning and wholly unsuitable for he if she were home. Her status here was similar to an occupation back home she had never and would have never considered. A profession parts of society stated as being bad, repulsive, dirty.. a way out for the desperate.
Here, it was different. Almost the opposite.
Her position was one that earned her respect, one that saved her life. It was a way of life she would be spurned by some people for having adopted if she was home. Here, it was the only way of life left open to her, the only professions available to a woman.. She either embraced her career and adopted the lifestyle.. or she died.
Death was not an option she would consider.
It had been a struggle at first; between her pride, her morals and her survival. On one hand, it had been drilled into her from an early age to do whatever necessary to live, to survive in a dangerous situation. On the other.. the old her saw the option that would allow her to live as being one that would compromise her integrity.
The old her and her sense of strict integrity died as her desire to survive won out.
She was surprised pleasantly to have retained her sense of self-respect. She didn't exactly enjoy her new life but she didn't hate it. She resented being put in the position of having no real choice but she accepted her fate and knew she would do whatever necessary to live.
To live meant to dream.
To dream meant to think of home.
Home was where she longed to be, with people she longed would find her. The dream faded in daylight and on occasions when her services were required.. but here, at night, in her own private room, she was free to lie alone on her bed and indulge in the fantasy of what might have been.
With no sign of stopping or slowing, the rain continued to be her friend, tapping on the window, taking her back to the world she'd been taken from, allowing her entrance to her dream-created illusion. The place she could hope.
The hope giving her a reason to go on.
~*~
" Staring out the window at the sinking sun
Another painful day is done.
If I could convince myself I was over you now
I'd find a way to go on somehow."
~ 'The Healing Kind', LeeAnn Womack
~*~
~*~
Part Three
~*~
"In my dreams I'll always see you soar above the skies
In my heart there'll always be a place for you, for all my life
I'll keep a part of you with me. And everywhere I am there you'll be."
'There You'll Be', Faith Hill.
~*~
Groaning, Jack winced at the sharp twang of pain he felt as he tried to sit up straight in his chair. " Note to self," he murmured aloud. " Don't fall asleep in uncomfortable chairs." Biting back a hiss of pain, he forced himself up and out of the chair, stretching gingerly to relieve himself of all the kinks he'd gained from sleeping awkwardly.
After staring sightlessly out of the window for God knows how many hours, Jack had eventually fallen into a deep sleep disturbed only by his dreams. He wasn't surprised to find he dreamt about Sam – he usually did – but the more he dreamt about her, the more he felt to blame for her absence. Before she'd been taken from them, his dreams about her were.. pleasant, to say the least. Since she'd gone, they'd taken on a disturbing quality. Last nights dreams were no different to al the others.
It started in the same way; Sam would be sitting at the window of the same, tall ornately decorated building he'd seen before, he would be outside at the bottom of the structure calling out her name. She never heard him, though, and no matter how many times he walked about the perimeter of the building, he couldn't find a door or any other way in. Then Daniel and Teal'c would show up and tell him it was his fault, that he'd let her go and that he was the reason she couldn't come back. He ignored them and kept trying to get to her, hitting and kicking the wall, eventually trying to climb up it. He'd get so far only to fall down and have to start again and this would happen over and over again until the last time, when he'd make it to the window, call out her name.. and then he'd wake up.
Changing quickly from the clothes given to him by the Kavise family, Jack put on his own clothes and made his way to the small washroom he'd been shown to the previous evening. On his way back to his room, he bumped into Captain Gardam, who had also changed into her own clothes.
" Captain."
" Colonel." She met his gaze evenly, running a casual hand through her sleep-mused hair. " Did you sleep well?"
" Fine." Jack answered shortly, her attempt at an interested tone sounding more insincere than genuine. He couldn't help but feel she was up to something and he couldn't think what it would be. The way she was looking at him was disconcerting so he decided to take his leave as soon as he could. " Ah, if you'll excuse me, Captain. I need to talk to Doctor Jackson."
" Oh." Gardam looked a little disappointed as she stepped out of his way. " Well. See you at breakfast, Sir."
" Yeah. See you." Frowning, Jack brushed past her and moved down the hallway, knocking on one of the doors before disappearing inside.
Gardam watched him go through narrowed eyes. Over the course of the night, she'd been thinking. Thinking about her positions on SG-1 and at the SGC and how that would change if her team mates got their wish and Major Carter was found. Gardam was just a solider, she didn't have Major Carter's scientific background. She hadn't taken to her team mates and they hadn't taken to her. She hadn't made an effort to get to know them, nor had she mad much of an effort to make them want to get to know her. She hadn't been the friendliest of people to anyone since getting her new assignment. She knew, without a doubt, that if given the choice, Colonel O'Neill and the others would choose Major Carter over her. If this was the planet, if this was the day they found her.. Time for Andrea Gardam was running out. Depending on how lucky her fellow team mates were, she might only have twenty four hours to win them over and convince them she was the best woman for the job. Determined not to be bumped from the team, Gardam was going to have to have a complete turn around if she wanted to stay.
Smiling to herself, she sauntered into the washroom, closed the door and gazed at her reflection in the mirror. She was a relatively attractive woman and had been told she could charm and flirt her way out of any situation if she tried. Colonel O'Neill and the other unwitting members of SG-1 were going to help her discover if that were true.
~*~
Sunlight streamed through the uncovered window and the woman asleep on the bed stirred as a cool breeze washed over her skin. Stretching languidly, Sam opened one eye and took in the familiar appearance of her room, quenching the small twinge of sadness she felt at being here instead of home. It was the same every morning – she woke up hoping the last however many months had been a dream.
Sam had lost count of how many Earth months she'd been gone, the calendar system of moon-cycles on Velenthia was different to Earth's – sometimes the moon-cycles were longer than Earth's months, other times they were shorter. Not that it mattered anyway, on Belethia she'd had no way of keeping track of the time as it was constantly warm and light so she couldn't tell whether it was night or day most of the time.
Ordering herself out of bed, Sam swung her legs over the side of the bed and pushed herself to her feet. She stretched again, lifting her arms above her head and bringing them down to push her hair from her face before lowering her hands to straighten her thin nightdress. Although she had grown accustomed to wearing the flimsy gown, she still longed for the days when she could curl up in her tank top and cotton sweat pants.
Padding barefoot across the soft floor, Sam swung open one of the windows and closed her eyes. The cool air floated over her as she inhaled the fresh scent of the newly fallen rain drying in the morning's sunlight. She smiled on hearing the sounds from outside the palace's seclusion infiltrate her senses, hearing the sweet chirps of the birds and the friendly hum of voices in the city's streets.
" Samantha?" The timid voice followed a gentle knock. " Are you awake?"
" I'm awake," Sam answered just loud enough to be heard. " Come in." She continued to stand at the window until she heard the door open and close. " Good morning, Karalynn." She smiled warmly at her visitor, no longer as self-conscious as she had been about her appearance and state of undress. Karalynn was a gentle woman of a few years – life-cycles – older than Sam. She was also assigned to be Sam's personal aide, given the position by the King who insisted Sam had someone to help her at all times. Karalynn's duties included helping Sam bathe, dress and prepare herself for her appointments.
" Good morning, Samantha," Karalynn smiled affectionately and embraced Sam in a motherly fashion. " You look well."
" As do you," Sam responded, returning the embrace whole-heartedly. The two women pulled away at the same time and Karalynn moved to the large wooden wardrobe to browse the array of clothes Sam could choose to wear for the day. " It looks like the storm passed quickly," Sam murmured, returning her attention to the window and life outside. " It's going to be a gorgeous day."
" Most storms pass through the night, Samantha. You should know that after sleep through so many of them in your time here," Karalynn responded with a fond smile, pulling a pale lemon coloured gown from the closet. " You look most becoming in this colour." She held the dress up for Sam to judge.
Crossing the distance between them, Sam touched the dress, as she looked it over with a critical eye. It was made of a light material similar that was similar to both cotton and silk, cool but smooth, and glided over the skin easily. Long and loose skirt with a fitted bodice that fastened at the back with laces, it seemed like the perfect outfit for a warm day. Nodding at Karalynn, Sam slid the dress from its primitive hanger and all but threw it on the bed. " I haven't got many plans for the day, it'll do fine."
" Good." Karalynn smiled with satisfaction. " You will not need to bathe this morning, will you?"
" No." Sam shook her head. " I bathed myself last night." It was another thing that had taken her a while to get used to, having help when bathing herself. The King insisted she be aided in the task so Karalynn often heated the water and scented it with exotic oils and then washed Sam's hair for her as the younger woman relaxed. It reminded Sam of being pampered at a health spa but Karalynn failed to understand the comparison. Sam moved to take her night gown off – which was no more than a slip of white silk with some lace over her chest – but hesitated, feeling self-conscious with Karalynn still in the room despite having gone through this same routine every morning. " Is Evelyn awake yet?"
Karalynn smiled again at the question, anticipating the request before it was asked of her. " Evelyn was still sleeping when I went to check. Should I go and fetch her?"
" Please." Sam smiled gratefully and waited until she was alone before stripping and dressing in a clean slip and the pale lemon dress. Within minutes, Karalynn rejoined her and was busily tying and tightening the laces of the dress's bodice. " Is Evelyn on her way?"
" She will be here shortly," Karalynn replied. " She was going to bathe before joining you so you could help her dress. She said she would not ask you to help her bathe since she was sure you would be busy."
" Thank you." The dress fastened, Karalynn began combing Sam's hair with an intricate brush, a gift from the King himself, Sam's blond tresses having grown considerably during her stay on Velenthia. " I was thinking I could wear my hair down today," Sam suggested as Karalynn began to work her magic.
Expertly braiding two small plaits from two separate sections of hair either side of Sam's head, Karalynn joined them together at the back of Sam's head and held them above slightly so she could brush through the remainder of hair. " This should keep it from your eyes whilst remaining down, Samantha, and I know the King likes your hair this way."
" Yes." Nothing else could be said about that, the King and her relationship with him were two aspects of her new life Sam kept closely guarded. " Have you.. Have you seen him this morning?"
" He has asked for you to grace him with your company at breakfast," Karalynn told her with an indulgent smile. " He seemed eager for you to join him. He is very fond of you, Samantha. Since his wife died.."
" I know." Sam cut her off as her eyes slid shut. " Since she died, he's been very closed off until I came along. *I know*." She opened her eyes and sighed softly. " I know what everyone thinks, Karalynn., but it's not true. It isn't like that between us, it's.. it's different."
Karalynn clucked her tongue sympathetically and placed her hands on Sam's shoulders. " No matter what you say, the people are going to see what they want to believe. Your position.. The King obviously favours you to the others.. and that makes them suspicious."
" Well they can think whatever they want to think." Sam declared stubbornly. " It won't change the fact that it's not true."
Smiling to herself, Karalynn nodded to Sam as the younger woman took her seat at the wooden dressing table – one of her gifts from the King. Sam busied herself by writing in the makeshift diary, a leather-bound book, which was also a gift from the King, as Karalynn set about unnecessarily organising the clothes in the wardrobe until a knock on the door signalled the arrival of Evelyn.
Opening the door to admit the young woman, Karalynn excused herself and left the two alone. Sam stood up and greeted Evelyn with a warm smile and equally warm embrace. " Morning, Evie," she smiled affectionately as the young woman's face lit up with a beautiful yet shy smile.
" Good morning, Saman-Sam." Evelyn hastily corrected herself, pushing a strand of coppery-blond hair from her deep brown eyes. " Did you sleep well?" She asked politely, still a little confused at why the King's favourite had chosen to befriend and look out for her.
" Fine. You?" Sam moved away to the window as Evelyn nodded coyly. " It's going to be a beautiful day, do you have any plans or appointments?"
" No." Evelyn relaxed as she felt an immense sense of relief at being able to answer negatively. A pink blush travelled up her cheeks as she continued. " But Nicholi said he would try to see me. We may be eating at mid-day in the gardens."
" A picnic." Sam smiled a little wistfully at the confused expression that befell her young friend. " It's an Earth term," she explained softly. " It doesn't matter. Now," she turned to Evelyn with a weak smile. " We have to get you dressed. You can't walk around in your underwear all day."
Again, Evelyn blushed and the two women were soon on their way to Evelyn's room after making sure the door to Sam's was locked securely, cutting through the wing of the palace designated for the courtesans. On their way, they passed other courtesans who rewarded them with icy smiles or scowls. Neither of them reacted, both accustomed to the hostility they were shown by their contemporaries.
" Samantha?" Evelyn sounded unsure as they entered her room, closing the door behind them.
" Yes?" Half-heartedly, Sam wandered over to Evelyn's smaller wardrobe, searching for the dress she had pictured in her mind.
Sitting on the edge of her bed, Evelyn fidgeted with the frill on the edge of the blankets. " Do you still miss your home?"
Sam's face softened as she turned with the pastel blue dress in hand. She knew Evelyn couldn't understand some of the things she told her about Earth or the people there, some of the things she'd talked about were concepts Evelyn had never dreamed of or experienced herself – like the concept of choosing what you wanted to do rather than having it forced upon you. Or the concept of coming from a home with family and friends who loved and wanted you – something Evelyn, sadly, had gone without in her short lifetime. At least until Sam had arrived and taken on the role of both Evelyn's mother and big sister. " I do miss it, Evelyn. Until I'm back there, I always will."
" What's it like?" Evelyn shifted to make room for Sam on the bed. " Why's it so wonderful you can't forget about it?"
Smiling sadly, Sam closed her eyes to conjure a picture of home in her head. Unsurprisingly, when she thought of home, she thought of the people there rather than one particular place. " One day, you'll see it with me," she vowed, opening her eyes to look at Evelyn. " You'll understand someday. It's not any one thing that makes it so special, or any one person.. There are a lot of things that make Earth my home, Evie. There's the places and buildings," she said, picturing the SGC and her home as she spoke, the images in her mind soon dissolving into being pictures of faces she saw regularly in her dreams. " And there's the people. My family, my friends, the people I worked with, the people I.. the people I love."
" Like Nicholi?" Evelyn questioned, a half-curious, half-dreamy expression arranging her features. She looked at Sam with the same gleam in her eyes Sam recalled seeing in Janet and Cassandra's so long ago. " Is there someone like Nicholi waiting for you at home?"
Opening her mouth to answer, Sam hesitated as a secretive smile played on her lips, one of the faces she associated with home being dragged to the forefront of her mind. " There's.." She paused again, the smile fading as she shook her head to dismiss the image. " There's no one waiting for me," she answered eventually. " Not that I know of."
" Maybe there is," Evelyn suggested, seeing the sadness play across Sam's face but unable to the reason for it. Instinctively, she reached out and took Sam's hand in hers, smiling innocently. " Maybe there's somebody waiting for you and you just don't know it yet."
Forcing a smile, Sam squeezed Evelyn's hand. " Maybe there is." She cleared her throat and got to her feet, a hand quickly going up to her face as she suspiciously wiped at her cheek. " In the meantime, we have to get you ready. The King is expecting me to join him soon."
Evelyn nodded, silently acknowledging the change in conversation, making a mental note to broach the subject of Sam's sadness with Nicholi when she saw him later. A bright smile spread across her face as she felt the same bubbles of excitement in the pit of her stomach that she always felt when thinking of Nicholi. Without any further hesitation, Evelyn stood and took Sam's advice on what to wear and how to do her hair, the smile a constant as Sam helped her apply her make-up, both women lost in their thoughts of two very different men and being in similar relationships with them that weren't allowed.
~*~
As Sam left Evelyn's room to dine with the King in the palace, her former team mates settled down to breakfast with their hosts. The four members of SG-1 sat down with Bernadette and Torin, surprised to find Nicholi, the young boy who'd brought them here, was absent.
" Nicholi has gone to work," Bernadette answered their unasked question as she sipped from her drink, some sort of herbal tea. " He works at the palace and has to travel through the forest to the city each morning."
" You must be proud of him." Daniel gave the woman a smile of gratitude as he took the mug she offered him. " Working at the palace must be a good job."
" It is." Torin beamed, his round face glowing with pride as he thought of his youngest son. " We are very proud of Nicholi, he has great aspirations."
For a few minutes, they ate in silence. Jack played with the food on the plate before him, his mind occupied with images from his disturbing dreams. Teal'c sat and observed everyone, sensing some kind of shift in Gardam's attitude but unable to put his finger on what it was which perplexed him. Daniel and Gardam were silent, digging into their food as they waited for the opportunity to ask some questions.
" Nicholi told us you are visitors to our world," Bernadette eventually gave them the chance after breakfast had been eaten. " He did not tell us why you have come to Velenthia."
" We're looking for a friend," Daniel started speedily before anyone else could get a word in. " We believe she was taken from us with the intention of being sold to someone on this planet."
Neither Bernadette or Torin battered an eyelid at the question. " It is possible," Torin answered. " Those with enough wealth travel from Velenthia through the Circle of Stone to purchase workers for their land."
" Can you tell us a little more about the city?" Gardam asked quickly, changing the subject and ignoring the glare she got from Daniel for doing so. " I mean, who would we talk to about finding our.. missing friend?" The last three words proved difficult for her to say.
Torin exchanged glances with his wife and caught the sight of her subtle nod. " The first person you should see is the King. I will take you to the palace soon and arrange a meeting for you with his advisors."
" Will the King know if our friend is here and where we can find her if she is?" Daniel pressed on eagerly.
Looking a little uncomfortable, Torin nodded. " The King.. his advisers do much acquiring of women on other planets. Those deemed appropriate are brought here and taken to the palace where they are put to work."
" What kind of work?" Jack's stomach lurched at the possibilities, the knot in his stomach tightening at the looks shared between Torin and his wife.
Torin looked to him and stared into his eyes or what seemed like a long time, reading something there that made him even more uncomfortable. " I will take you to the palace if you are ready to depart. You will find your answers there."
Glancing quickly at the faces of his team, Jack nodded and got to his feet. " We're ready whenever you are."
~*~
The trek to the palace was a strangely enjoyable one. The air was fresh and crisp, the sun was warm but not stifling. The planet was a beautiful one and reminded them of Earth, of what Earth must have been like before industries expanded and took over the land. They followed Torin in silence, trusting the older man to take them where they needed to be, all four members of SG-1 contemplating what would happen if the King gave them the answers they wanted and the answers they dreaded.
Eventually, they made it to the palace, which was even more beautiful up close than it had been to Daniel and Gardam from a distance. Even Teal'c and Jack were impressed with the splendour of the oldest and biggest building in the centre of the city.
" Are you sure you can get us in there?" Jack asked Torin after staring up at the palace for a few minutes, trying to work out just how tall it actually was. His best guess was that it was at least twice the height of the Gateroom.
Torin nodded and smiled. " The King welcomes his people, both the wealthy and the not-so-wealthy. All Velenthians are told to bring our planet's visitors here if they need to discuss a matter of trading or information." He started towards the ornate gates that were fixed into the palace's wall. " Come, there will be someone who can help us within the palace grounds."
Once again following him, SG-1 watched in amazement as the gates were opened by two guards who smiled welcomingly at them. Daniel stared wide-eyed around the inside of the palace walls, realizing the amazing structure they'd passed wasn't the outside of the palace but merely an enclosure for the actual building itself, which was decidedly more elegant and breathtaking.
" It is a beautiful palace, is it not?" Torin grinned at them. " It was built many, many life-cycles ago by the people of the Great-Grandfather of our present King as a gift of thanks for years of protection and leadership."
" It must have taken years to build!" Daniel uttered, awe-struck. " The detail on the carvings.. The towers.. It's like something from a fairytale!"
Looking pleased at the praise, even though he didn't fully understand it, Torin led them across the cobbled courtyard and up to one of the guards standing outside a pair of huge wooden doors that led into the palace itself. " Talako, I have with me some visitors from another world," Torin addressed the guard. " They need to see the King to discuss a matter of trading, is it possible they will be granted an audience with him soon?"
Talako looked at the four strangers and back at Torin, giving him a short nod. " I will tell the King's advisors you are here." He looked to his companion and held a silent conversation, which ended in the other guard leaving through the doors. Turning back to Torin, Talako smiled. " It has been a while, old friend."
" Yes, it has," Torin smiled back. " How is your family?"
" They are well, my daughter has plans to wed in two moon-cycles. I would be honoured if you and your family would attend," Talako answered pleasantly.
Torin clapped him on the back. " We would be honoured to join you. Please tell your daughter we are pleased for her."
Talako was stopped from saying more to Torin by the arrival of the second guard. He looked expectant. " Can they enter?"
" The King is tending to some business," the second guard answered. " But Akima granted them permission to wait in the public meeting hall of the East wing."
" Very well." Talako nodded briskly and looked at Torin. " You have permission to proceed, the King or one of his advisors will be with your shortly. You know where the hall is?"
" I do." Torin answered in the affirmative. " Thank you." Talako opened the doors and Torin led SG-1 through them and into a main entrance hall lavishly decorated with a carved staircase, thick carpets and magnificent paintings on the wall. Without giving them time to pause to take it in, Torin walked through one of the archways and led them up a spiral stone staircase. They followed him through a maze of doorways, halls and even more stairs before eventually coming back to the decorated section of the palace instead of just the stone walls and floors. Torin stopped outside one room and opened the doors, ushering SG-1 into a large room with a huge wooden table in the centre and a fireplace at one end. " This is the meeting hall. Whenever the King's people have a problem, we all meet here to discuss it with him and his advisors."
" Sounds fair," Daniel murmured, looking up to see where the light was coming from, finding the ceiling was made of multicoloured stained glass that depicted no real image, just a random pattern of colours. " Wow."
" It is impressive," a voice from behind them spoke up, his tone of authority echoing around the room. " Forgive me." A short, wiry man with white hair approached them. " I am Akima, one of the kings advisors. Torin, you say these people wish to trade?"
" They are looking for information as well as trade, my Lord," Torin bowed slightly out of courtesy. " My wife and I offered them shelter from the storm and I brought them here to speak with the King."
" Thank you," Akima nodded at him to straighten. " You once again have done the honourable thing. You may leave now, I will see to it that your visitors are looked after." Torin nodded and started to leave the room. " And Torin?"
" Yes, my Lord?" Torin paused in the doorway.
" If your son is as honourable as you, he will have a long future here serving the King." Torin ducked his head, obviously pleased by the remark and excused himself, leaving SG-1 alone with the King's advisor who studied them all keenly. " You travelled through the Circle of Stone?"
Jack motioned to Daniel to answer. " Ah, yes. We did. Where we come from, we call it a Stargate."
" Yes." Akima didn't seem surprised. " I have heard of it being referred to as that before. You wish to trade with us?"
" We travel looking for allies and new friends," Daniel answered quickly. " We also came here because we heard a friend of ours who was taken from us might have been brought here. She was.. sold.. to someone on the planet Belethia and we were given the address of Velenthia."
Akima looked up sharply at that. " We do trade with Belethia, so it is possible. The King himself will help you determine if she is here." He looked curious. " You said you travelled seeking new allies. Allies against what?"
" Erm.." Daniel hesitated and looked at Jack for guidance. He didn't want to say they were looking for allies against the Goa'uld too soon. It was still possible that the King they were waiting to meet was one. " We.."
" We would prefer to speak to the King directly about that, if you don't mind," Jack cut in smoothly. " We have to be cautious about who we talk to, you understand."
Akima nodded though his expression suggested that he didn't. His eyes fell on Gardam and narrowed. " You are a female?"
" Yes," Gardam answered tersely, her own eyes narrowing suspiciously. " Why?"
" Your clothing is not appropriate for a meeting with the King." Akima told her decisively. " Women of Velenthia are forbidden from wearing the clothes of a man." He turned to Jack, sensing the authority the Colonel had. " Will you give permission for this woman to be dressed in proper attire? I cannot permit her to meet the King if she is not.. Her current attire would be offensive."
Jack hesitated. It had been something like that that had cost them Sam. He looked questioningly at Gardam. " Captain? It's your call. You want to go get changed or wait for us somewhere with Teal'c?"
Gardam cast a quick glance at the Jaffa and then at Akima and sighed inwardly. " I'd rather not miss meeting the King, Sir. I might have some questions to ask him." She looked to Akima. " Where do I go to get proper clothes?"
" You will be taken to the ladies of the palace who will assist you," Akima explained. " I will go and fetch one of them to take you to the right place." He left the room for only a minute, returning with an elegantly dressed woman in a fitted dress reminiscent of the fashion of 15th century Europe on Earth – just like the buildings Daniel had noted. " Veronica will assist you in changing your clothes, Miss..?"
" *Captain* Gardam," Gardam corrected haughtily, eyeing with distain the amount of Veronica's skin that was on show.
" Captain Gardam," Akima acquiesced with a small smile. " Veronica?"
" Yes, my Lord." The woman curtseyed and left, leaving Gardam to follow after heaving a long-suffering sigh.
" She will be well looked after," Akima assured them, mistaking her team mates exasperation at Gardam's behaviour with concern. " Now, if you wait here, I will go and see if the King is ready to see you."
" Sure, fine." Jack watched the man go and sighed heavily as the doors to the room closed behind him. " Whatever."
" We're close, Jack," Daniel murmured, taking a step towards the weary Colonel. " I don't know how.. but I know we're close."
Jack was silent for a few moments, scuffing his shoe against the rug on the floor. Finally, he looked up, his eyes pained. " I hope you're right, Daniel." He looked away again, his voice almost too quiet to hear. " I don't know how much more of this I can take."
Daniel looked up in concern and met Teal'c eyes. The Jaffa nodded in acknowledgement, letting him know he hadn't imagined that last comment, and the archaeologist began praying to whatever God was real that they found their friend and fast, before they lost another one.
~*~
Meanwhile, Gardam was being led through the confusing maze of corridors and staircases and doorways again, having to half-run to keep up with Veronica. On her way round a sharp bend, she collided with another woman who was heading in the way she'd just come.
" Oh, sorry!" She pulled back and looked up into the woman's face, her eyes narrowing at the familiar yet strange face that stared back at her. " I wasn't looking where I was going.. I was trying to follow someone.."
The woman gave her a tight smile, her face pale. " It's okay," she murmured in reply. " The corridors are too narrow for more than one person either way." As she spoke, she moved closer to the wall, allowing Gardam to pass her as she pushed a strand of silky blond hair from her eyes. With a weak smile, the woman was off again, walking quickly along the stone hallway.
" Bye." Gardam watched her go, feeling slightly chilled. She felt as though she'd seen a ghost.
" Don't mind her," Veronica appeared at her shoulder, sending a glare down the hallway at the other woman's back. " She acts like she's the Queen most of the time."
" Right." Gardam started following Veronica again but her mind was preoccupied. She knew that face from somewhere, of that she was certain. But those eyes.. She felt a shiver wrack her spine. Those eyes were so haunted, so full of misery. The woman had looked wounded, lost. Gardam had never seen someone look so.. desolate before, as though something was missing. She shuddered again as she turned down another corridor, certain those eyes would be coming back to trouble her in her sleep for many nights to come.
~*~
" I want it all to go away, I want to be alone
Sympathy's wasted on my hollow shell
I feel there's nothing left to fight for
No reason for a cause
And I can't hear your voice and I can't feel you near."
~ 'Lost', Sarah McLachlan
~*~
~*~
Part Four
~*~
" Oh and every time I'm close to you,
There's too much I can't say,
And you just walk away."
~ 'I love you', Sarah McLachlan.
~*~
Sitting in the centre of the busy room, Gardam tried to contain her interest and mild disgust. She had gathered the women helping to make her presentable were courtesans and she felt uncomfortable knowing these were women who slept with strangers for money.
" Excuse me," she spoke up eventually. " Can I ask you something?"
" Of course," Veronica smiled politely down on her. " You are a guest of the King. You may ask us what you wish."
Smiling a little smugly at having some power over them, Gardam looked from one pretty face to the next. " That woman we passed in the hallway, the one I bumped into, who is she? What's her story?"
Veronica snorted as the others shook their heads, wearing identical expressions of envious annoyance. " *She* is the King's favourite. She is the one most want to be with but cannot because the King protects her." She leaned in conspiratorially. " She is trouble, you should warn your companions. Some say she has powers over men to make them desire her. I do not know if that is true but there *is* something strange about her so be careful."
" You speak nonsense, Veronica," the slightly older woman from the corner of the room chided sharply. Gardam looked past the others to where Karalynn was sitting in a chair, sewing a dress. " Do not be swayed by their petty jealousy," she warned Gardam. " There is nothing in Samantha that can be threatening to anyone. She is a kind, gentle woman with a good heart. Perhaps she is desired so because she has a sweet nature, something *you* would know little of, Veronica."
" You have been as blinded by her as the King has," Veronica dismissed her claims with the wave of her hand and sat down in the chair beside Gardam. " Your companions are handsome. Are they married?"
Gardam shook her head. " They were all married once, I think. I know Doctor Jackson – that's the one who was wearing glasses – was married but his wife died."
" So they're available?" Veronica's eyes gleamed.
" Would it matter if they weren't?" Gardam shot back evenly. She tilted her head to one side. " I'm sorry if I sound harsh but I didn't think that mattered to.. umm.. women like you."
" It doesn't," Veronica laughed. " I was wondering if any of them were married to you. It is unusual for a woman to travel with men she is not related to or married."
A one-shoulder shrug was Gardam's response. " We're not a usual team. SG-1 is a team of explorers and I'm one of them." She sighed and looked at her hands. " For now, at least."
" Is there a chance you won't be with them for long?" Veronica question curiously.
" If my team mates find their friend, a woman named Sa-" Her voice trailed off and her head snapped up. " Did you say that woman we passed was called Samantha?"
Once again, a shadow crossed over veronica's face. " Yes, that is her name. Why?"
" No reason," Gardam replied hurriedly, her eyes drifting to the door as it opened. Low and behold, Samantha Carter stepped in, followed by a very young looking woman. Without so much as looking at the other courtesans, the two newcomers crossed the room to where Karalynn was sitting. " As I was saying," Gardam continued, raising her voice so Sam could hear. " They're looking for a missing friend to take her home but I'm pretty sure I won't be replaced on the team. We're all pretty close," she added, watching as Sam looked up. " Personally as well as professionally. In fact, I wouldn't be surprised if Colonel O'Neill and myself get *a lot* closer once he's able to put finding their former team mate behind him. I think he'll probably be able to give up searching soon, and get over the guilt of letting her go."
A small smile tugged at her lips as Sam got up and left the room, her two companions staring confusedly at the door after her. Gardam ignored the tiny tug of remorse at having caused the haunted woman she'd felt pity for earlier even more pain but she quashed it immediately, telling herself that she had to do this, had to use her opponents weakness, to ensure her position. Now all she had to do was keep SG-1 from seeing Sam, who hopefully would remain quiet now she thought her team mates had moved on, and in a few days, they would leave Velenthia and her position on SG-1 would be guaranteed for the future.
" Can you take me back to my team now?" She asked, smiling sweetly. " I think I should warn them about the woman."
" Of course." Veronica got to her feet and offered her a hand. " I will take you back to them immediately."
Gardam followed, walking as fast as she could with the extra weight of the clothing she was unaccustomed to wearing. She was verging on desperation, wanting to get to her team to make sure they didn't get the opportunity to discover her lies. She didn't know why she'd said she was close to Colonel O'Neill when in actual fact she knew he barely tolerated her but, then again, she'd heard the gossip, she'd seen the evidence. Although no one knew for certain that Colonel O'Neill and Major Carter were sleeping together, it was obvious that her disappearance had affected the Colonel greatly. Gardam had gone with her suspicions and said those things in the hopes they would disillusion Sam's hopes of going home and keep the other woman from letting the others know she was there.
With that thought in mind, Gardam quickened her pace, justifying her actions by telling herself she deserved the place on SG-1 more than some General's daughter did, telling herself it was all of *her* hard work at stake.
~*~
" How much longer do you think we'll be kept waiting?" Jack asked with a heavy sigh, pacing in front of the fireplace. He was nervous, on edge. He just wanted to find out if she was here and leave – hopefully with her.
" Jack, I'm sure he'll be here soon. He's the King, he's probably very busy," Daniel tried to placate him.
" Your companion is right, I am busy." A tall, elegant-looking greying-haired man stood in the doorway, his handsome face warm and welcoming. " Yet I still apologise for keeping you waiting so long."
" Your Majesty." Daniel lowered his head for a few seconds. " I'm sorry for our impatience.. We're very anxious to see you.."
The King smiled in amusement. " Do not apologise. It is I who should apologise to you. Please," he motioned to the chairs with his hand. " Be seated and we shall talk." He took the chair at the head of the table, watching as Jack and Daniel each took on at his side and Teal'c sat down next to Daniel. " You." The King motioned to Teal'c, his tone one that expressed interest. " You are not like your companions."
" I am not," Teal'c agreed solemnly. " I am a Jaffa. The Goa'uld enslaved my people. I was in service to the Goa'uld Apophis before I joined O'Neill and Doctor Jackson in their battle against the Goa'uld," Teal'c explained, able to do so when he sensed no naquada emanating from the King.
" Now would be a good time to introduce ourselves," Daniel put in with a smile. " I'm Doctor Daniel Jackson, you've met Teal'c, and this is Colonel Jack O'Neill. Our.. fourth.. person is Captain Andrea Gardam, she was taken to be properly attired."
" Akima told me," the King answered conversationally. " I understand you are here looking for trade and a missing friend?"
" Yes, in a way." Daniel gave him a nod and folded his hands on the table in front of him. " We travel through the Stargate looking for new allies and technology to aid us in our fight with the Goa'uld. However, our main reasoning behind coming to Velenthia is to find a missing team mate of ours, a friend who was taken against her will to the planet Belethia where she was traded to someone. We were given a list of places she might have gone to from there and Velenthia was on the list."
" I see." The King rested his chin on his hand and turned unexpectedly to Jack. " I sense that the mention of your missing friend saddens you deeply." His voice was low and warm, not at all threatening or intrusive. " You feel a great deal of pain at her loss, and feel sometimes that the sadness with never leave." Jack looked up in surprise and opened his mouth to protest but the King merely held up a hand to stop him, smiling serenely. " Please, I do not mean to intrude. I am merely intrigued about the woman you are looking for. Perhaps if you tell me about her, describe what she looks like, I may be able to find out if she had been purchased by someone in my kingdom."
Jack nodded and took a deep breath, picturing Sam in his mind. " She.." He cleared his throat to clear the unexpected lump he found there. " Her name is Samantha Carter. She's tall, slender.. She has blond hair, blue eyes.. A great smile.. She's.. She's strong, too," he smiled a little at that. " You'd know her if you saw her."
" She sounds very beautiful," the King smiled strangely, some kind of respect shining in his eyes.
" She is." Jack agreed with a pained smile.
" Ah," Daniel slid a picture across the table. " This is her. Taken a few months before she was taken from us."
The King picked up the picture and studied it intently, a wistful smile playing on his lips as he took in the happy faces smiling back up at him. He swallowed the lump in his throat and slid the picture back across the table towards Daniel. Looking at Jack, he smiled sadly. " I feel the sadness within you may be soon forgotten, even if it is for only a short amount of time."
The doors to the room opened and they all looked up to see Gardam walk in, looking a little flushed, behind the same woman who had taken her from the room. " Your Majesty," Veronica curtseyed.
" Veronica, thank you for your assistance. You may go." The King dismissed her with the wave of his hand and stood with the male members of SG-1. " You must be Captain Gardam," he turned to her. " It is a pleasure to meet you."
" Likewise, your Majesty." Gardam smiled sweetly, though no one missed the slightly worried glance she darted in her team mates direction.
" If you would excuse me," the King spoke again, addressing Jack. " I have some business to attend to." He tilted his head to one side. " I would be honoured if you would consent to being my guests for the remainder of your stay here in Velenthia. My advisors will answer all and any questions you have on our city and technologies and we would welcome an alliance with you against the Goa'uld. They have not been here in recent life-cycles but there are records that suggest they were here many, many life-cycles ago," he continued. " You will all be given comfortable rooms and are most welcome to join me at meal times, if you wish to stay."
" That's a very generous offer, thank you." Jack didn't have to think twice about accepting, especially as both Daniel and Teal'c gave him nods of encouragement even though Gardam seemed a little put out. " We accept."
" Excellent," the King beamed at them. " I will send someone to take care of you at once. You may wish to change your attire to feel comfortable about my people - clothing will be supplied."
" Thank you." Daniel and Jack said in unison as Teal'c nodded his thanks. The King smiled at them one last time and left the room. " He wasn't what I was expecting," Jack murmured to Daniel.
" What? You were expecting the fur-trimmed robe and heavy crown, too?" Daniel looked at him curiously.
A small smile graced Jack's lips. " I was expecting someone a little.. rounder.. Most Kings.. they eat *a lot*."
The two men looked at each other and grinned, the thought hitting them at the same time that their conversation was completely pointless. It was good, though. Even Teal'c smiled a little. For the first time in months, it seemed like the old SG-1 was back and they were all acting like themselves.
" We're staying here?" The voice was an unwanted reminder that things weren't what classed as 'normal' for them and they all turned to stare at her. " I mean, I was just taken to see some courtesans.. You know what they are, right?" Her disgust was evident.
" They're women earning a living," Daniel responded coolly. " It's part of their culture, who are we to judge?"
Gardam scowled and folded her arms across her chest. " Fine, but don't say I didn't warn you."
" Warn us about what?" Jack asked with an impatient sigh.
" There's a particular courtesan, apparently she's the King's favourite." She lowered her voice for dramatic effect. " According to the others, she's dangerous. It's like she has all of the men under her spell."
Jack stared at her and rolled his eyes. " Consider us warned, Gardam."
" Sirs?" There was a timid voice at the door. A timid, familiar voice. " Ma'am?"
Daniel was the first to turn and see who it was. " Hi Nicholi."
" Daniel Jackson," Nicholi bowed his head. " I have been sent to act as a guide. If you follow me, I will show you to your rooms and then I will give you a tour of the palace and it's grounds. The King said you are to join him tonight for supper."
" Thank you," Daniel smiled kindly at him. " And you can call us by our names, you know. It's just Daniel, Jack, Teal'c and.. Captain."
Gardam bristled as Jack struggled to keep the grin off his face. He casually sauntered out of the room after Daniel and Nicholi, clapping his friend on the back as he caught up. Teal'c inclined his head to one side and waited for her to leave first, partly as it was what he did. Partly to hide the small smile on his face
~*~
A smile curled up the corners of her mouth even though her mood was dark. She couldn't help it as she stood near the fountain in the centre of Velenthia's market. All around her, people were living. Even those who didn't have much, they were happy with what they had. Two children
played a game on they understood on one side. On another, an elderly woman bartered good-naturedly for the lowest price she could get on some fabric, laughing and joking with the seller.
Sam sat down on the stonewall surrounding the fountain and watched the lives around her go on. She remembered what she'd over-heard and shook her head to dismiss the sour thoughts the memory brought with it.
After bumping into that woman in the hallway, Sam's mind had been racing. It had taken a few minutes for it to penetrate through her thoughts that the woman had been wearing a SGC uniform. Once it had sunk in, Sam had turned to go back the way she'd come to find Evelyn coming towards her with tears in her eyes. Comforting the young woman had taken priority over all else and Sam had led Evelyn back to the main chamber to see if Karalynn was there, knowing the slightly older woman was more likely to have some words of wisdom to impart.
It was there she'd lay eyes on the woman for the second time, and there she had heard what she feared – that her team had moved on and forgotten about her, that they were looking for her purely because they felt responsible.
She'd expected – and hoped – that they wouldn't dwell on her disappearance. That they would do all they could but eventually find peace – like she'd wanted them to do if she ever died on a mission. She wanted them to move on and get on with their lives but she hadn't anticipated how much it would hurt and how hard it would be. Sam told herself she was being selfish, but that didn't make it easier. Not at all.
She decided, sitting there by the fountain, that she'd lay low until they left. They would give up eventually and move on completely. She didn't want to stir things up again by suddenly reappearing and confusing everything and everyone.
It was better this way, that was what her head said.
Eventually, her heart would agree.
Sam didn't know how long she'd been sitting there, just watching, but she figured it was quite a while given that the children she'd been watching had gone home and the crowds swarming the market had thinned out. She was too distracted to notice the people looking curiously at her, wondering what she was doing outside alone. Her mind was focused on the people she would never see again; her father, her brother, her nephew and niece, Janet, Cassandra, General Hammond, Daniel, Teal'c, Colonel O'Neil.. It was then her eyes would sting and she'd have to close them to keep the tears from escaping.
" There is an element of mystery about you, almost an aura, that no one can explain and that, coupled with your beauty, is why they are so taken with you." The voice, although a surprise, was not completely unexpected. The King sat down beside her and took her hand, bringing it to his lips so he could press a kiss to her knuckles. " It is an enchanting combination, my dear."
" I thought you were going to be involved in business all day?" Sam asked with a smile, entwined her fingers with his, feeling nothing but affection for the man who had taken such good care of her and given her more that she could have wanted.
" I was," he answered simply. " But I changed my plans so I could spend some uninterrupted time with my favourite girl."
" Favourite girl," she repeated with a soft sigh. " You have no idea how much trouble I could get into if you said that in front of the wrong people."
The King was immediately concerned. " Is there a problem, Samantha? Are you being harassed by someone because of me?"
" No." She forced a weak smile and gave his fingers a squeeze. " No more than usual. I can handle it."
He, however, wouldn't let it drop. " Something is bothering you, Samantha. Please, tell me. Perhaps I can help ease your troubles?"
" This is out of even your control," she told him honestly, feeling a swell of appreciation at his sincere offer to solve her problems for her. " But thank you for offering to try."
They sat in silence for a while, enjoying each others company as they watched life pass them by, oblivious to the looks and stares and whispers. As the air around them cooled and the people in the market packed up to return home, the King realised he couldn't' put if of any longer and got to his feet, still clutching her hand in his. " Walk with me, Samantha?"
" Sure." She let him help her to her feet, smiling a little when his arm slipped around her waist, keeping her close. They walked a short distance through the city, eventually coming to where the forest on the other side of the city opposite where the Stargate was began. " There's something wrong, isn't there?"
For his part, he didn't try to deny it. " I have a.. request.. to put to you."
" Go ahead." Sensing his discomfort, she knew it was something she wasn't going to like.
He hesitated, wondering how to word it. In the beginning, because he had been so taken with her, refreshed by her independent spirit, they had reached an agreement. He would make as few appointments for her with other men in exchange for companionship. It made her the most wanted
courtesan because she wasn't so readily available and it gave them the chance to spend hours talking by the fire in his study or reading books by the fire in the library. It was an arrangement both enjoyed and were grateful for, a platonic relationship that went that went beyond mere friendship. It was also one of the reasons it was always difficult to assign her appointments and ask her to do something he knew she didn't want to do.
" I hate to have to ask this of you, Samantha, but I need you to do this." He stopped walking and withdrew his arm, twisting to face her as he took both of her hands in his. " I need you to tend to someone tonight, the leader of some travellers. I know I told you there would be no more occasions where your.. skills.. would be required in this moon-cycle but things have changed. We have the possibility of making a strong new ally against the Goa'uld, should they ever return here." The King gazed pleadingly into her blue eyes. " After hearing your stories of the Goa'uld, I feel the need to strengthen the chances of my people against them."
Sam was silent for a few moments, then an unreadable expression crossed over her face and she inclined her head to one side. " Who is he? I mean, where's this man you want me to see to from?"
" A place called Gythel," the King lied, immediately feeling bad for it but knowing what her reaction would be if she knew the truth, knowing she would refuse. " You look surprised. Were you expecting him and his followers to be of somewhere else?"
" I.. I thought I saw someone from Earth earlier.. Wearing an SG-uniform," she answered softly, lowering her eyes so he couldn't see what she was feeling in them.
He reached out and tilted her face up towards him." If I heard your friends were here, I would send for you immediately if that was what you desired."
" It isn't." Sam murmured decisively. " Not anymore." A sad smile curved up her lips. " My home is here on Velenthia now. I just have to learn to accept that."
" I will do all I can to help you," the King promised her earnestly, tenderly cupping her cheek. " Your happiness is one of my top priorities, Samantha. I may never be able to let you go but I will do all I can to help you adjust to your new life here with me."
" Thank you." She turned her head into his palm and pressed a kiss against her skin there. " And in answer to your request, yes. I will tend to whoever you want me to if it's what you need."
" Then it is I who should be thanking you." He smiled down on her and dropped his hand from her face, reaching to find her hand. " I should also be thanking whatever forces brought you to me."
The hairs on the back of her neck stood on end as her skin tingled. Sam felt eyes burning into her back and turned away from the King to see who was there, finding nothing but the path they'd walked along. Still feeling as though they were being watched, her eyes canned the tree line around them, searching for something or someone well hidden.
" Samantha? My dear?" The King's voice brought her attention back to him. " Is something wrong? Are you not feeling well?"
His concern was touching but she was too preoccupied to notice it. " I think we should go back," she answered slowly, eyes still searching. " It's getting late and I need to prepare myself."
" Very well." The King nodded, unconvinced by her answer but let her begin to lead him back to the palace.
It wasn't until they were inside the walls surrounding the palace that the sensation faded. Sam stopped at the doorway, looking over her shoulder but seeing only the guards on duty at the gate, she allowed the King to usher her inside.
Someone had been watching them, she was almost one hundred percent sure. The questions foremost in her mind were who and, more importantly, why someone was doing that.
~*~
The King dined with the members of SG-1, all who had changed into clothes that were more suitable for blending in to life on Velenthia. Their meal was the equivalent of a feast, and as well as the King, they were joined by several of his advisors and introduced to some of the Lords and Ladies of Velenthia.
After what seemed like hours, the last guest departed, leaving the King and the team mates alone. They adjourned to the King's private dining area as the King said he felt more comfortable in there and spent another hour listening to the King's stories about the city and his family. When Gardam asked about his wife, the King went silent, his expression distant as his eyes shone suspiciously. That was the end of the conversation as he excused himself shortly after that, telling them he would see them at breakfast tomorrow.
" What?" Gardam asked defensively as her team mates glared at her. " I was just asking a question!"
" A stupid question," Daniel corrected harshly, his thoughts automatically going back to his own wife and the pain he felt at loosing her. " It's none of our business how she died and wouldn't have achieved anything."
" How do you know?" Gardam argued. " Maybe he killed her, maybe our lives are in danger here with some crazed courtesan and a King who might have killed his wife to be with her!"
" Shut up," Jack ordered sharply. " It's his business, not ours. And will you *please* stop going on about that damn courtesan! It's all you've been talking about all day!"
Gardam scowled but remained silent. The door to the chamber opened and Nicholi stepped in, looking nervous, having heard the argument from outside.
" Are you ready to adjourn to your rooms now?" He asked timidly.
" More than ready." Daniel stood up first, followed by Teal'c, casting a disgruntled look in Gardam's direction. As they left, Gardam stormed after them, obviously annoyed her warnings had gone unheeded and Jack followed slowly, wondering what had got into her. He trailed behind them just enough so he could hear the conversation without being dragged into it. " Why are you still here, Nicholi? Isn't it a little late for you to be going home?"
A dark blush stained the young boy's cheeks. " I.. I am staying here tonight," he stammered nervously. " With a friend," he added softly. Both Daniel and Jack grinned at the admission as Gardam narrowed her eyes in disgust. Teal'c didn't react either way.
They reached Gardam's room first and no one was particularly bothered when she went into it and locked the door without saying goodnight. Next it was Teal'c who left, then Daniel. Finally, Jack and Nicholi reached his room and said goodnight before going their own separate ways.
Pushing open the door, Jack watched until Nicholi was out of sight before stepping in fully and closing the door behind him, reaching for the light switch seconds before remembering there wasn't one there.
" Damn."
It was then he turned away from the door and realised the need for a light switch was an unnecessary one. The fire had been lit in the fireplace and there was an oil lamp on the bedside table that was glowing. There were also some candles on the windowsill, their flames flickering in a breeze he couldn't feel.
Sighing to himself, he walked over to the bed and sat down. He was halfway through pulling off his boots when he noticed her. The silhouette of someone standing by the other window in the room, the woman with her back to him, gazing out of the window at the stars, looking as though she had no idea he was there.
" What the.." He stood up as though the bed were on fire and narrowed his eyes as he stared at her. Blond hair cascaded halfway down her back, coming to rest where the laces of dress's bodice were tied neatly. He remembered telling the King about Sam, and realised what he'd done – he'd all but described the type of woman he went for. Daniel had warned him, when they'd be walking with their guides, that it was common in 15th century Europe for women to be used to strengthen trade agreements and alliances, sent to entertain the leader of the party with whom the King wished to make an agreement with. Out of SG-1, that was him.
Taking a step forward, he noticed the tense line of her shoulders and realised she was probably as uncomfortable as he was. " I.. I think there's been some kind of mistake," he spoke up, his voice seeming even louder than it was in the quiet room. " You've.. You've been called unnecessarily.. I know.. Erm." It was one of the few times he wished he could talk his way out of problems like Daniel. Then he stopped wishing for that, picturing the bumbling archaeologist try to talk himself out of a situation like this, realising he probably stood a better chance at being able to. " If you have to be here, we can.. You don't have to do anything. We'll just pretend in the morning."
The woman stayed statue-still, failing to react at all to his words. Just as Jack was about to say something else, she spoke softly, her accent an unusual one, sounding half Velenthian as well as something else. " You do not wish me to stay?"
" I.. It's not that you're not pretty.. I'm sure you are," he stuttered nervously. " I'm sort of.. involved with someone."
" Your female companion?" She pressed in the same quiet tone.
Intrigued, he took a step closer but as she was standing in the shadows and facing away from him, he couldn't see her face or reflection in the glass pane. " No. Not her," he admitted softly, unable to tear his eyes away from her. " Someone else. Someone special.. Someone I'm looking for. It's kind of a quest," he continued weakly, unsure what it was about this woman that had him confessing all to her. " You see, she.. she went missing a while ago, and the only reason I'm here is to find her. The only reason I do this anymore is so I can find her, and take her home. Where she belongs." He swallowed the lump in his throat. " With me."
" Then consider your search over," the woman told him simply as a tear slid down her cheek at his confession, her voice losing its Velenthian edge and sounding more like the accent he was used to. Jack frowned and opened his mouth to speak but found he couldn't as she turned to face him, lifting her head so she could look him in the eyes. " You've found her, but your quest is a futile one. I can't go back. Not anymore. Velenthia is my home now."
Jack moved his mouth but no words came out. He just stared at her, into those blue eyes he'd feared he'd never see again, taking in every detail of her face, taking note of all the differences in her appearance and filing them away in his memory.
Standing before him, with eyes that glistened in the moonlight, was Samantha Carter, not the one he remembered but a version of her.
The search was finally over. So why did it feel like something was still missing?
~*~
" Like a star that guides a ship across the ocean,
That's how your love can take me home back to you,
And if I wish upon that star – someday I'll be back where you are,
I know that day is coming soon - yeah I'm coming back to you."
~ 'Back to You', Brian Adams.
~*~
~*~
Part Five
~*~
"I am here to tell you we can never meet again
Simple really, isn't it, a word or two and then
A lifetime of not knowing where or how or why or when
You think of me or speak of me or wonder what befell
The someone you once loved so long ago so well."
~ 'Written in the Stars', Elton John & LeAnn Rimes
~*~
The sense of peace he'd been expecting when he found her was absent. The joyful, happy reunion he pictured was shattered. It just wasn't to be.
Sam stood in front of him, her heart pounding so loudly in her chest she was sure he could hear it. He hadn't said anything, not since she'd turned round and revealed who she was. From the way he was staring at her with eyes that were wide with shock, she wasn't sure if that was a good thing or not. He was looking at her as though he were seeing a ghost. In a way she reasoned, he was.
A ghost of a person he never thought he'd see again. A woman who was a shadow of her former self, reduced to this because of circumstance.
She lowered her eyes again, afraid of what she'd see when he realised she was still the woman he'd first thought she was, a courtesan sent to please him, afraid to stare into the eyes she'd been dreaming off and seeing disgust, ashamed for the first time in a long time for what she had done to survive.
Turning back to the window, she waited for him to speak, closing her eyes tightly to keep the tears she felt forming at bay. Her mind was spinning. The King had lied to her and she couldn't understand why. She had trusted him, yet as soon as the door had opened, she'd known he'd lied. She didn't know what it was exactly that had made her think it was Jack. Maybe it was the sound of his boots on the floor, but as soon as she'd heard his voice, she knew without a doubt who the King had sent her to tend to: the last person she had ever wanted to see her like this.
She wondered if there was a way she could leave without anyone spotting her. The last thing she wanted was someone causing trouble by telling the King she was shirking her duty but she didn't think she could spend all night here, feeling his eyes on her back, feeling disgusted and ashamed of herself and knowing he would be feeling the same.
" Sam?" His voice was tinged with disbelief and took her by surprise, as did the hand on her shoulder, which is why she jumped. " Hey," he spoke softly, taking a step closer as he felt her tense under his touch. " I'm not going to hurt you, Carter."
" I know." She didn't sound too convinced so he gently turned her to face him, putting a hand under her chin to tilt her face up to his. What she saw in his eyes was unreadable, although it looked similar to what she saw in the eyes of the other men she'd been sent to but she couldn't bring herself to believe it was the same thing. " Sir?"
" Jesus." He let out the breath he'd been holding, searching her eyes deeply. " It really is you, isn't it?"
" Yes, Sir." She lowered her eyes again. " I know this is probably the last place you thought you'd find me but it *is* me. I'm just.. different."
" Jesus," he repeated again, his hand moving from her shoulder to her waist as he pulled her towards him, closing his eyes as she went into his embrace and eventually relaxed in his arms. " It's you. It's really you." She was different, though. He knew that. He had seen something in her eyes, something akin to fear, which told him she'd changed. " I can't.. Wow."
A smile flickered across her lips in spite of herself. He was still the same Colonel O'Neill she remembered, the one she knew and --. She abruptly ended that line of thought and pulled away to study him, seeing new lines on his face and the relief in his eyes. No shame or revulsion, not yet anyway. " You've been looking for me?" She asked with a shy smile, unable to think of anything else to say.
" What do you think?" He rolled his eyes at her, unwilling to let her leave his arms fully just yet. " You think we'd just let you disappear and leave it at that?"
" No," she admitted with a smile, easing herself out of his arms, liking the feeling too much. " I just thought you'd have given up by now, moved on.."
" Not a chance in hell of that happening," Jack murmured, keeping his eyes on her as she moved to sit on the edge of the bed, grinning at the way she fidgeted with her hands. " You know we'd never give up."
She looked up, a strange expression on her face. " Funny you should say that. I heard today you were on the verge of giving up and moving on with your lives. That's why I was kind of hoping you'd leave without finding out I was here."
Once again, the shocked expression was back on his face, quickly replaced by one of anger. " Who said that?" He moved to the bed and sat down beside her, his voice confused. " You were going to let us leave without finding you?"
Sam chose to answer the first question, deciding that was the one with the easiest answer. " The Captain who's on SG-1. I don't know her name. I passed her in the hallway, then heard her telling the others she was my replacement, both on the team.. and off." She looked down at her hands. " She seemed pretty confident her position was a permanent one, both in your professional life and personal one."
" I can barely stand her," Jack assured her, covering her hands with one of his, tracing patterns on her skin with his thumb. " None of us can stand her. Captain Gardam.. She's got nothing on you, Carter. I promise." He watched her face carefully as he spoke. " There's no chance of her or anyone else taking your place in our lives, professional or otherwise." He lifted his other hand to catch the tear that fell from her eye and onto her cheek. " What's wrong?"
Closing her eyes tightly, Sam shook her head, her hair falling about her face. " I.. I wanted to hear that.. but I didn't." She opened her eyes to look at him, letting him see how much this was hurting her. " I can't go back with you, Colonel. I can't go home." She sighed heavily. " It would have been better if you hadn't seen me here. Your Captain had the right idea by not telling you she'd seen me."
" She's not my Captain and she *didn't* have the right idea at all!" He protested, his voice rising in volume as his anger and confused increased. " What the hell are you talking about? Of course you're coming home with us!"
" No, I'm not." She raised her eyes defiantly to his. " I can't. I have obligations here. This *is* my home now. I have to accept that and so do you."
" If you're worried about the King not letting you go.. We can work something out, include you in our trade agreement or something." He continued, trying to put her at ease and convince her she could leave.
" It's not that simple," Sam protested, shaking her head. " There are so many things you don't understand.. The King might want to let me go but he can't." A sad smile briefly graced her lips. " I won't let him."
Jack stopped drawing pictures on her hand and stared. " You care for him," he stated bluntly.
" Not in the way you're thinking," was all Sam said in reply.
They stared at each other in silence, trying to read what the other was thinking but failing to do so through their own confusion and misunderstanding. Sam sighed heavily and got to her feet, smoothing down the full skirt of the blue silk dress she wore.
" I should go," she told him softly, walking purposely towards the door. " If you know what's good for you, you'll forget you ever saw me."
" How do I do that?" He murmured, getting to his feet quickly so he could get between her and the door. " How do I forget I found the one thing that's kept me with the SGC for the last eight months?"
Her head lowered as she found the floor to be more interesting than his face. " I wish you hadn't said that."
" Well I don't regret saying it," he answered simply. " Because it's true." He took a step closer, making her take a step back and unwittingly cornering her against the door. " And I won't accept this as being goodbye. I won't let you slip away again, Carter. I promised your father I'd bring you home. I promised General Hammond I'd do all I could. I promised Cassie and Doc. Fraiser that I would never give up. I promised myself I wouldn't let you go again once I found you." He put a hand on her shoulder, seeing her bottom lip quiver, knowing he was getting through to her. " I promised Daniel and Teal'c we'd do whatever it took to take you back with us when we found you, no matter what it was. I'm not going to pretend this never happened, that I never saw you. I'm going to tell Teal'c and Daniel tomorrow when I see them and you can bet your life on them supporting my side on this one." His hand travelled up her shoulder to cup her face. " We're not letting you go, Sam. None of us are."
" You *have* to!" Sam whispered brokenly, a few more tears working their way down her face. " You have no say in the matter. You have to let me go."
" Not gonna happen." He responded firmly. " Not in this lifetime."
The tears ran freely down her face as she cried, she'd tried not to but he was making it so hard. Why was he being so damn persistent? Why wouldn't he just let her go? It had hurt to think they had moved on with their lives but at the same time, it had been a relief to know they had been able to and were doing okay without her. Now she was hurting more, hating the fact she had to be the one to hurt her friends and family, the people she loved, by telling them she couldn't come home like she wanted to.
Jack pulled her into his arms again, holding her close as she cried, trying and failing to understand why she was so upset and why she was so adamant she couldn't go home with him. He couldn't believe it. After all those months of searching, here he was with her in his arms and she was telling him to forget about her!
The only thing he found comfort in was that the thought of her staying on Velethia was obviously hurting her as much as it hurt him, which meant it wasn't what she really wanted to do.
Careful not to disturb her, he led her over to the bed and sat her down, holding her in his arms, soothing her hair from her face as she tried to stop crying into his chest. He wasn't used to seeing her cry, the Samantha Carter he had known would have never let anyone see her cry, but that was one of the differences between the woman she had been and the woman she had become. That woman had been a Major in the US Air Force, striving to prove herself to be as strong as any of her male colleagues, tears a sign of weakness she couldn't afford if she wanted to win their respect. The one in his arms was unable to hold hers back, no doubt having been trying to for a lot longer that she would admit. The person holding him as tightly as he was holding her was Samantha Carter the woman, not the solider. The one who had been through the unimaginable over the last eight months and who was still being denied the chance to go home by something he couldn't see.
~*~
He didn't know how long they'd been holding each other but he knew it had been long after she'd stopped crying. Still no words had been spoken, neither of them willing to break the comforting silence that had them wrapped in its embrace. Sooner or later, he knew, one of them would have to. It was getting late and they both needed to sleep. Sitting up in each other's arms was not the most comfortable position he could imagine.
" Sam?" For some reason, it was easier to say her first name than call her by anything else. It was like he needed to use it to reassure himself she was there, to assure himself he was able to call her by the name he'd rarely used before she'd disappeared, assuring himself he'd been given a second chance. Besides, Carter did seem to suit her anymore. Carter was the name of the solider that went into wars with him at her side day after day after day. The woman he was holding didn't seem to fit into that mental image, she was too.. feminine, soft.
" Hmm?" She was already half asleep, her eyes swollen and drowsy when she lifted her head to look at him.
" I'm not an expert," he started with a tender smile, brushing a strand of hair from her face with a gentle hand. " But I think you'd probably be more comfortable sleeping lying down."
Nodding, Sam raised a hand to her mouth to stifle a yawn as she got to her feet, blinking to clear her eyes. She turned back to face him, appearing shy and uncertain as she bit her lip. " Ah.. Maybe I should go back to my room.."
" Won't you get into trouble if someone sees you?" He didn't want her to leave.
" True.." She agreed with a nod. " But it might be better if.."
" You can stay here, we're both adults," he offered quickly. " There's plenty of room and I promise I don't bite."
" Okay." She smiled coyly and started moving away again only to stop. " You don't have something I can lend to sleep in, do you?" She shifted nervously from one foot to the other.
" This dress isn't the most comfortable thing I've ever worn." She chose not to mention the fact all she was wearing underneath was two thin slips of silk that revealed more than they hid.
Given what he guessed she did for a living, he found her shyness endearing.. as well as a little disappointing. Was she really more comfortable letting strangers see her in a state of undress than him? " I've got a T shirt you can borrow in my pack," he answered instead, rising to his feet to fetch it. " Just promise you'll give me it back."
" Promise," Sam smiled at him, hiding her crossed fingers behind her. She took the proffered black T-shirt and gave him a smile of thanks that spread into a grin as he turned her back to let her change in privacy. Her fingers made deft work of undoing the laces at the back of her dress and she stepped out of it at the same time as pulling the T shirt over her head and over the silk underwear, relieved when she found the T shirt was quite long. " All done," she announced quietly, picking up the dress and folding it carefully, laying it on the dressing table that stood in the corner of the room.
Jack quickly shed the shirt he was wearing and finished taking off his boots and socks, deciding the wisest thing to do was the sleep in the trousers Nicholi had given him to wear. Awkwardly blowing out the candles and turning the oil lamp down, they both got into bed, lying on their sides and careful not to touch. After five minutes of deliberately trying not to touch her, Jack gave up trying and put an arm over her waist lightly, letting her know he'd move it if it made her uncomfortable. Instead, Sam smiled in the darkness and shifted backwards until they were lying back to front, putting her arm over his as she closed her eyes.
She knew nothing could happen between them, she would never let it knowing that it couldn't go anywhere, and she knew tonight was nothing more than a brief trip into denial, a temporary escape from reality. But it was all they had, all they would ever have, and she wasn't about to let it end sooner than it had to.
" Night, Sam." His breath was warm on her neck and she had to fight to stop herself from shivering.
" Goodnight, Jack," she whispered back, twining their hands together on her stomach.
They fell asleep within minutes, the warmth of the fire soothing them as much as the sensation of the other in their arms. As the fire died and the first signs of sunlight streamed in through the windows, Sam carefully detangled herself from Jack's arms and slid from the bed. She changed out of the t-shirt and into her dress quickly and quietly, picking up the discarded t-shirt and walking over to the door. She cast one last glance at him over her shoulder, a fond, wistful smile for what might have been in place on her lips as she slipped out unnoticed.
Two hours later, Jack woke up. He reached out, certain there had been someone else in the bed beside him when he'd gone to sleep, disappointed but not surprised to find nothing but an empty bed.
He got up and walked to the window, glancing out over the expanse of the city, wondering if it was possible he'd lost her to this place for good.
~*~
There was no sign of Sam ever being there as he got dressed. She had been, though, he was sure he hadn't dreamt it. More than sure, unless all the pillows in the palace were fragrant and Sam-scented.
Whistling to himself, he opened the door to his room just as Nicholi was about to knock on it. " Good morning, Nicholi," he greeted the young man with a broad smile. " Sleep well?"
" Yes, thank you," Nicholi answered, bewildered by the grin on the Colonel's face. He had been under the impression Jack rarely grinned, and never with such enthusiasm. " The King sent me to take you to breakfast. He may be late in joining you but he assured me he would be there."
" Then lets go." Jack started whistling again as they walked down the hallway, collecting his team as they walked past the separate rooms. Daniel and Teal'c were as bewildered as Nicholi at the shift in his mood but they went along with it without asking, pleased that something had cheered him up. Gardam, however, was another story. She frowned at the change in him, telling herself over and over it had nothing to do with Samantha Carter. If he'd seen her, she would have heard something, wouldn't she?
They made it to the dining room and had sat down to eat before Daniel found he couldn't contain his curiosity. He put down the knife he'd been using to butter some bread and gave his friend a quizzical 'lets have it' look.
" What?" Jack grinned, his brow creasing as he noticed he had the attention of his whole team. " What did I do?"
" You tell us," Daniel frowned. " You're acting like you're on cloud nine."
" Cloud nine? Me?" He started to protest but his lazy grin suggested otherwise. " I'm not.."
" I believe Daniel Jackson is correct, O'Neill," Teal'c interrupted. " You do seem in high spirits this morning."
Jack just grinned like the cat that got the cream and drank a mouthful of fruit juice. He put the silver goblet down and decided to put them out of their misery. " Okay, I give. There is a reason I'm in 'high spirits' as Teal'c put it." He almost laughed at Daniel's 'I knew it!' expression. " When I got to my room last night, I found someone waiting for me."
" A courtesan?" Daniel cut in as Gardam choked on her juice. Daniel looked appalled. " Oh, God. Jack, tell me you didn't."
" I didn't what?" Jack tried to act oblivious.
" Tell me you didn't sleep with someone else when we're supposed to be trying to find Sam," Daniel pleaded with a sigh.
Jack grinned but also managed to look offended at the same time. " I didn't. Geez, give me a little more credit."
Daniel had the grace to look apologetic. " Sorry.. I just assumed.." His voice trailed off and he lapsed into a remorseful silence.
" Well you shouldn't," Jack told him, trying to sound annoyed but failing. " Anyway, as I said. I got to my room to find someone waiting for me. And yes, she is a courtesan, I think. And yes, she spent the night in my room but we just talked and slept. Nothing else." He threw a genuinely annoyed look in Gardam's direction. " In fact, I believe you met her yesterday, Captain. I assume she's the one you were warning us against meeting?"
" Sir, I can explain.." Gardam started feebly, stopping when Jack waved his hand to cut her off.
" You'll get the chance to do that in your report to General Hammond when we get home." He retorted sharply, having no time or patience to deal with her now. He had never particularly got along with her, there had always been something about her he didn't like. At first he had thought it was as Teal'c had said, because she reminded them that Sam wasn't there. Now he knew better and his suspicions had been justified.
Daniel frowned again, totally lost. " Is someone going to enlighten us on what's going on?"
" It was Carter, Daniel," Jack replied, the grin coming back to his face. " As in Sam Carter. Our Carter."
Daniel spat fruit juice all over the table, spluttering. " Sam?!" He demanded as soon as he could. " You saw Sam?"
" Yes." Jack grinned and nodded. " I saw her and I talked to her. We've found her."
Daniel stared at him with his mouth agape. Teal'c looked at him with what Jack assumed was a shocked but happy face – it was hard to tell exactly. Gardam stared down at her food, her appetite lost.
Before any of them could react, the door opened to admit the King. He smiled warmly at them all, his eyes resting on Jack as he took his seat at the head of the table. " I hope you all slept well?" He asked politely as he helped himself to some cold ham and bread.
" Yes, very well, thank you," Daniel regained his voice in time to answer, nodding enthusiastically.
" I slept peacefully, thank you," Teal'c bowed his head.
The King glanced to Gardam. " Captain? I trust you slept as well as your companions?"
Gardam's eyes rose to meet his, the scowl still present on her face. " Yes, thanks. I slept fine."
" And you, Colonel?" The King apparently decided to ignore her scowl and turned to Jack, his eyes smiling. " Did you sleep well?"
Jack grinned and nodded. " Better than I have in a long time, thank you."
" I am pleased to hear that," the King looked genuinely relieved. " Now, shall we eat?"
The meal was eaten and the dishes were cleared away as they made small talk, with Daniel once again asking questions about the city and its history. The King answered each one in turn, patiently going into detail about the struggles his people had faced and how they had developed technology over the years to help them ease the burden of heavy-duty work whilst at the same time managing to abide by many of the city's traditions. It amazed Daniel that there had been very little conflict throughout the city and the rest of the planet, especially when he learnt the kingdom stretched beyond the city of Velenthia to other cities across the planets surface.
" If you would like, I can have someone show you to the library where you can study our history in great detail," the King offered kindly. " We have many records about the history of my people, spreading back to when Velenthia was discovered by my great ancestors."
" You would really let me see those records?" Daniel was amazed at the generosity, his eyes wide with excitement. " That would be great!" He turned to Jack. " Do you know how much we could learn with this information? How much we could learn about our history and how civilisations in Europe developed in the early centuries? Oh." He realised the King probably had no idea what he was talking about. " You see, we believe that.."
" That Earth is the planet our kind came from originally," the King finished for him with a smile. " The Goa'uld took humans from Earth and to other planets to enslave them."
" How did you..?" Daniel's voice trailed off as light dawned in his eyes. " I'm guessing Sam told you that."
The King smiled. " Samantha has taught me a great deal about the Goa'uld, which is why I am so interested in Velenthia becoming one of Earth's allies." His smile grew a little. " She is confident you will one day be strong enough to beat the Goa'uld for good."
" The Tau'ri are strong and wise," Teal'c noted. " Major Carter's confidence is well placed."
" Speaking of Carter," Jack started. " I kinda need to talk to you about that."
" Yes." The King didn't seem fazed. " I was expecting you to request a private audience with me. I've taken the liberty of arranging for Doctor Jackson, Teal'c and Captain Gardam to be shown around by three guides so they can each go wherever they want." He stood and smiled again, seeming a little less at ease than he had before as he moved to the door. " Colonel? If you would join me, we can continue this discussion in my study."
" Of course." Jack gave Daniel and Teal'c their orders in one look and let the King lead him from the room. The two men walked in silence down a long corridor, turning onto yet another one and finally ending up in a small, cosy room with a big wooden desk and bookshelf lined with books.
Sitting down in one of the chairs by the fire, the King motioned for Jack to join him. He waited until Jack was sitting comfortable before motioning to a picture above the fireplace, a painting of a beautiful woman with inky black hair and green smiling eyes. " The portrait is of my wife."
" She's very beautiful," Jack murmured, unsure of what he was supposed to say or where this was going.
" Yes, she was." The King smiled sadly. " She was more than just beautiful, though. She was a good person. She was a kind and generous woman. Beautiful on the inside." He took a deep breath and sighed. " It's the same quality I recognised in Samantha when she came here. I saw through her attempts at being brave, I saw she was scared and I brought her here, away from the others, so I could talk to her alone." He smiled again. " She is like no woman I have ever met yet she reminds me so much of my wife."
" I don't see where this is going," Jack responded honestly. " What does this have to do with Carter?"
" I find it strange you call her by her surname when she obviously means a great deal to you," the King commented quietly. " This has everything to do with Samantha, Colonel." He tore his eyes from the smiling face of his wife. " You are part of the family she spoke so fondly of, aren't you?"
" If you mean SG-1, then yeah. I am."
" SG-1," the King repeated. " It is the designation for your team, Samantha explained that to me. She also told me how much she cares for you all. You are like family to her, which is why I sent her to you last night."
Jack frowned. " Why do I get the feeling you're going to tell me something I don't want to hear now?"
" Samantha has already been to see me this morning," the King didn't sound as happy about that as Jack had expected. " She was angry with me for lying to her about whom she was being sent to, yet I noticed she was both pleased and discontent." He threw a sidelong glance in Jack's direction. " Just as I noticed there was a change in your demeanour this morning." He sighed heavily. " I think I made a mistake in sending her to you. Samantha, although she is more at peace now than I have seen her, was also greatly distressed about something."
Jack felt his own concern build up. " Is she okay?"
With a small nod, the King ran a hand through his hair. " I asked her what was troubling her. She told me she believes that I have made your departure harder on you both." He stared evenly into Jack's eyes, his anguish obvious. " I cannot let her return with you, Colonel. I wish I could, but I cannot."
" Why not?" Jack stood and towered over the King. " If you care about her as much as you say you do, let her go and be happy?"
" I care greatly for Samantha, Colonel," the King murmured. " I wish I could set her free but it is not my decision."
" Of course it's your decision!" Jack exploded. " You *own* her! You can let her leave with us! We'll trade you for her! Whatever the Hell you want, you can have!" His eyes narrowed suspiciously. " Unless you want her for yourself. Unless you're just acting like you want to let her go so she feels sorry for you and trusts you."
" Enough!" The King's eyes were blazing as he stood and glared at Jack. " I will not have you belittle my feelings for Samantha! I would *never* use her in that manner! I love Samantha as I would love a daughter," the King clarified. " She is the child my wife and I never had, the daughter I longed for instead of the son I got."
" Then why can't you let her go?" Jack persisted. " It would make her happy if she could come with us."
" I know it would." The King let his chair support his weight once more. " But it does not change the complications that forbid me from doing so. However," he continued with yet another sigh. " I have arranged it so Samantha is free to spend as much time with you and your team as possible throughout your stay on Velenthia. And you are more than welcome to return to visit her whenever you desire. I encouraged Samantha to spend time with you and your companions, I know it would mean a lot to her. One of the things she misses greatly about your world is being able to spend time with those whom she loves. And she does love you, Colonel. I am sure of it, we have discussed you many nights in this very room. I hope you do choose to come and visit her even after your business here is done." He looked up, pleading for understanding. " This is the best I can do, Colonel. I am sorry, for Samantha's sake as well as your own. I know it must be as hard for you as it will be for her to let go."
Jack stared down on him, seeing the grief that lined the King's face, somehow knowing how hard it was for him to admit that he couldn't help them. " Well, thank you. For all you've done for her," Jack murmured. " And thank you for letting her see us if she wants to." He crossed the room to the door, looking back to see the older man raise a hand to his face. " I don't intend on letting her stay here but if she does.. Take care of her for me."
" I will," the King promised as the door closed with a gentle click. " I will protect her with my life." He buried his head in his hands and let the tears fall, silently praying to his wife to forgive him for being weak and choosing popularity over the happiness of another woman he loved.
~*~
" Sometimes I just forget
Say things I might regret
It breaks my heart to see you crying
I don't wanna lose you
I could never make it alone."
~ 'Glory of Love', Peter Cetera
~*~
~*~
Part Six
~*~
“ This perfect romance that I've created in my mind
I'd live a thousand lives
Each one with you right by my side
But yet we find ourselves in a less than perfect circumstance
And so it seems like we'll never have the chance.”
~ ‘Ain’t It Funny’, Jennifer Lopez
~*~
He didn’t see Sam again for the rest of the day. Jack rejoined his team, finding them all in the library with Gardam silently occupying herself by reading something and Teal’c helping Daniel get through the stack of books on the desk, making notes on everything they learnt.
“ What’s wrong?” Daniel looked up when Jack sat down, his shoulders slumped. Concern and worry shone in his eyes as he immediately started thinking the worst, all sorts of scenarios racing at lightening speed through his head. “ It’s not Sam, is it? She’s okay?”
“ She’s fine,” Jack grumbled uncooperatively. “ But she can’t leave with us. The King wants to let her but said he can’t.”
Blinking, Daniel closed the book he’d been reading, forgetting to care about book marking his place “ Why not?”
Jack shrugged. “ I don’t know, he didn’t say. Carter pretty much told me the same thing last night. There must be a reason, maybe she’s signed a contract or something. I don’t know.”
“ Could we not trade for Major Carter’s freedom? We have done so before.” Teal’c questioned, as fond of the thought of leaving Sam behind for a second time as Daniel and Jack were.
“ The King said there was nothing we could do,” Jack sighed and rested his head in his hands. “ He said she’s free to spend as much time as she wants with us while we’re here but she can’t leave. We’re welcome to come back and visit anytime we want.”
“ That’s not good enough,” Daniel protested, voicing Jack’s thoughts. “ We haven’t spent eight months searching for her just to be told we can’t take her back with us.” He leaned across the table, searching Jack’s face for any signs of a plan. “ What are we going to do?”
“ I don’t know,” Jack admitted, ending the young man’s hope that he had a plan. “ I got the impression Carter doesn’t *want* to leave. We can’t force her to come with us if she really doesn’t want to. I don’t think I’d be able to try and make her do something she wasn’t happy with.”
“ No.” Daniel agreed, getting to his feet. “ But we can try and talk her into it.”
“ Daniel, where are you going?” Jack called after him as Daniel approached Nicholi, the young man a constant presence. It was his new assignment, wherever SG-1 went, Nicholi had to be there to.
“ Going to see a courtesan,” Daniel called back over his shoulder, giving Nicholi a nod. “ I want you to take me to Samantha. You know who she is, right?”
Nicholi nodded. “ Of course. Samantha is a friend.” He looked nervously at the other two guides, debating mentally what he should do as he made up his mind. “ I will take you to her because the King said to do as you wished.”
“ Thank you.” Daniel gave him a grateful smile. “ See you later, Jack.” Before the Colonel could protest, Daniel had left the library, leaving Jack staring after him and hoping he would help the situation instead of making it worse.
~*~
Nicholi led Daniel to a side of the palace he hadn’t been before – the courtesan’s wing. Daniel guessed immediately where he was being taken, passing many women along the way who blatantly stared at him and a few men who looked.. satisfied.
“ The main chamber is that way,” Nicholi whispered, pointing down the hallway into a brightly coloured room. Instead of taking Daniel down towards the room, he took a sharp left, leading the archaeologist up a spiral staircase. “ Most of the courtesans rooms lead into the chamber where they prepare themselves daily.”
“ Then why aren’t we going there?” Daniel frowned, looking back the way they’d come. “ I thought you were taking me to see Sam?”
“ I am.” Nicholi grinned. “ Samantha was given a private room, away from the others. She is important to the King, therefore she gets special privileges.”
“ Right.” Daniel didn’t know what to think of Sam getting ‘special privileges’ and he didn’t *want* to think of what she’d done to deserve them. “ So how do you know the way to her room?”
Nicholi blushed deeply. “ Samantha is a friend,” he mumbled. “ She.. She helps me.”
“ Helps you what?” Daniel wasn’t sure he liked where this was going.
As if sensing this, Nicholi stopped walking and turned to face him, his cheeks pink and his eyes wide. “ I am in love with a courtesan,” he confided quietly. “ My Evelyn, she is close to Samantha. Samantha takes care of her for me when I am not able to and often arranges for Evelyn and I to meet here when I am unable to pay.”
“ Ahh.” Daniel nodded, relieved beyond words at the answer. “ She’s like that,” he commented as they started talking again, needing to fill the silence with something so he wasn’t left to concentrate on his nerves. “ Sam’s the kind of person you can go to with your problems and she’ll do her best to help you solve them.”
“ She is a very kind woman,” Nicholi concurred. “ When she first came here, she was very sad. She barely spoke to anyone and only ate when the King was there to make sure she did. Then Evelyn was injured.. She was beaten by one of her *lovers*,” Nicholi spoke the word with disgust and Daniel understood perfectly. The thought of Sha’re being with Apophis bothered him a lot so he could empathise with what Nicholi was feeling. He also thought he could identify with what Jack must have felt when he’d learned of Sam’s new profession but he hadn’t said anything about it to the Colonel. Jack had been in a rare good mood; he wasn’t about to risk changing that by bringing up images Jack didn’t need to dwell on. “ Samantha helped her,” Nicholi continued. “ She defended her against the man and took her to her room to help treat her wounds.” Nicholi smiled. “ From then onwards, Samantha has been a great friend to us both.”
“ That sounds like the Sam I know,” Daniel smiled in return, taking the last few steps of the staircase, finding himself in another corridor. “ So where do we go from here?”
Nicholi pointed to a big door just ahead of them. “ That is Samantha’s room.” He covered the distance between them and the room, knocking on the door softly.
Daniel followed quickly, his heart pounding, eager to see his friend again. Within a matter of moments, the door was opened by a young woman, whose face lit up on seeing Nicholi. Daniel hid a smile behind his hand, guessing accurately that this was Evelyn.
“ Nicholi,” Evelyn smiled coyly, looking up at him through her eyelashes. She noticed Daniel for the first time and blushed slightly. “ You have brought a friend.”
“ This is Daniel,” Nicholi told her quietly, obviously unable to take his eyes off her, smiling softly. “ I have brought him to see Samantha.”
“ Of course.” Evelyn stepped aside. “ Please come in.” She turned away from them, tearing her eyes away from Nicholi with some difficulty and Daniel smiled again at the two, having seen the same thing a thousand times between Sam and Jack. “ There is someone here to see you, Samantha.”
Daniel caught sight of her before she saw him. His breath caught in his throat as she seemed to look up from the book she was writing in in slow motion. He watched as she pushed a strand of hair from her face, her eyes widening in shock when she saw him. He grinned, unable to stop himself, and lifted an arm to wave. A smile spread across her face as she put the book to one
side and pushed herself off the bed.
“ Daniel?” She took a hesitant step closer, trying to tell herself she wasn’t dreaming, that he was really here which meant she had really spent the previous night sleeping in the arms of her ex-Commanding Officer.
“ Sam.” He covered the gap between them and swept her into an enthusiastic hug, holding her as tightly as he dared. “ You really *are* here.”
“ Yes, I am.” She pulled away, smiling, her eyes damp. “ And so are you.”
“ You look.. You look great,” he murmured, motioning the figure-fitting dark green dress she wore, taking in everything from her head to her toes, bringing his eyes back up to meet hers. “ You look amazing.”
Sam, as he’d expected, blushed prettily at the compliment. “ You look well,” she returned. “ Someone’s been taking care of you.”
“ We’ve kinda been taking care of each other,” Daniel replied in explanation. “ We had to, you know, pull together. So we could find you.”
“ Well you did, find me that is.”
“ Yeah, but Jack said you can’t or won’t come home with us.”
All of a sudden, Sam understood the reasoning behind his surprise visit. She shook her head and turned her attention to Evelyn and Nicholi who were standing close enough to be holding hands and were watching the reunion with interest in between sneaking glances at each other. “ Nicholi,” she addressed the young man first, giving him a warm smile. “ Thank you for bringing
Daniel here. I think we should speak alone for a little while. Why don’t you two go for a walk?” The two young lovers nodded their heads enthusiastically at the idea. “ And if anyone asks,” Sam added before they left. “ Tell them it was my idea and I have the King’s permission.”
“ You can do that?” Daniel asked when they were alone.
“ Not really,” Sam admitted with a mischievous smile. “ But no one around here’s going to argue with me. Not to my face, anyway.”
“ Because you’re close to the King,” he guessed correctly.
“ He’s like a father to me,” Sam supplied. “ He’s taken care of me and given me more chances than anyone else would have done.”
“ Is that why you won’t leave him?” Daniel asked carefully, sitting down on the edge of the bed. “ Because you feel like you owe him something?”
Sam smiled and fought the urge to roll her eyes. “ Still as subtle as ever, I see.” She sat down beside him and tilted her head to one side. “ But no, that’s not why I’m staying. I’m staying because I have to, because Velenthia is my home now. Because my leaving would cost him too much.”
“ What do you mean?” Daniel frowned. “ What would he lose aside from you?”
“ It’s complicated,” was all she would say on the matter before changing the subject to something she felt more comfortable with. “ So how are things on Earth? Is everyone okay?”
The next twenty minutes were filled with his stories about how everyone back home was, telling Sam about Cassandra’s grades and new boyfriend, about Janet disapproving of her daughter dating already, about General Hammond going through a brief mid-life crisis and being caught on more than one occasion contemplating a toupee. Then he got serious and told her how they’d heard her father was going on more and more dangerous missions because he couldn’t accept that she was gone and how the team had come close to falling apart because they stopped talking to each other and started believing they were individually to blame for her going missing. It was Janet and Cassandra who had interfered and got them back on track, inviting them all round to their house and spending the evening telling their favourite ‘Sam’ stories.
“ Please.” Sam interrupted him in a harsh whisper. “ Don’t say anymore. This is hard enough as it is, Daniel. I don’t need you making it worse. Please, don’t make me feel worse than I do.”
“ As worse as it’s going to be for us having to go home and say ‘yeah, we found her but she decided not to come back with us’? Do you have any idea how much Jack’s been blaming himself? How’d you think he’s going to cope if he lets you go again?” Daniel demanded.
Standing and walking away from him, Sam put her hands to her ears. “ I said stop! I don’t want to hear *any* of this! I *can’t* go home, Daniel. I want to, I *really* do but I just can’t! So leave it at that!”
“ For now I will,” he conceded after a lengthy pause. “ But don’t think we’re going to go without a fight.”
“ The thought had never crossed my mind,” she muttered sarcastically. She looked back at him when she heard him get to his feet. “ You should go soon. I hear there’s a ball we’re all expected to go to tonight. I have to get ready for it.”
“ First I’ve heard,” Daniel responded with an arched eyebrow, unable to stop himself from being suspicious. From looking at her, he couldn’t tell if she was using it as an excuse to get him to leave or if she was telling him the truth.
Sam smiled depreciatively. “ The King organised it in honour of your new alliance. He wants to introduce you to the Lords and Ladies. He likes springing surprises on people so you probably won’t know till an hour before it starts.”
“ Oh.” He shifted from one foot to the other. “ Guess I should find the others then, huh?”
“ I’ll show you the way if you want,” she offered, knowing he had a tendency to lose his way, as someone knocked on the door and opened it without waiting for some sort of acknowledgement.
“ That won’t be necessary.” The King appeared with a small nod of acknowledgement to Daniel. “ I would be quite happy to walk Doctor Jackson back to the library where I believe the rest of his team is awaiting him.”
“ Thanks.” Daniel barely nodded, his arms crossed over his chest as he glanced to Sam, not wanting to leave her. “ I.. umm. Guess I’ll see you later?”
Sam approached him and gave him a quick hug. “ You can count on it.” She stepped back smiling though her eyes were bright. “ Now go leave me alone. I’ve got a party to get ready for.”
Reluctantly, Daniel moved away from her and out into the hallway. He heard the King say something but the words were too muffled for him to understand. When the King left the room and shut the door behind him, it was impossible to see what kind of response Sam had had to the news as the King’s face was impassive.
Silently, feeling no need to talk, Daniel let the King take him back to his friends, fighting the feeling that he had somehow failed in his aim to convince her to come home.
~*~
As Sam had predicted, all of SG-1 but Daniel were oblivious to the King’s plans until barely an hour before the ball started. They ate lightly and were quickly ushered to their rooms to change into the clothes waiting there for them. Once again, Gardam found herself with Veronica as an assistant although the courtesan was less forthcoming with information this time, speaking only when spoken to.
This didn’t help the sour mood Gardam was in and by the time the team managed to be ready to attend the ball, it was in full swing. The amazing ballroom Daniel had ‘oohed’ and ‘ahhed’ over in their initial tour of the palace was well lit with candle-scattered chandeliers and strategically hung oil lamps. There were dozens of people there, all dressed in the same way
as SG-1. The men were in dark trousers and smart shirts and jackets; the women were all in multicoloured gowns of expensive-looking material.
The King immediately walked over to them, with no other than Sam on his arm, smiling broadly as he sipped from a goblet. He escorted Sam to them, who smiled self-consciously at the appreciation in Jack and Daniel’s eyes as they took in the curves and folds of the deep red gown she was adorned in, a dress with a tightly-fitted, low-cut bodice and a long, flowing yet flattering skirt.
“ Gentlemen, Captain,” the King bowed to them. “ Welcome to the.. ah.. What did you call it, my dear?” He frowned, searching his mind for the word.
Sam bit her cheek in attempt at keeping a smile at bay but failed. “ Party,” she supplied softly, looking anywhere but at Jack.
“ Yes, party!” The King beamed. “ That was it! Welcome to the party! Please, help yourself to food and nourishment. We have the finest musicians in all of Velenthia here tonight to entertain our esteemed guests. Now if you’d excuse me,” he released Sam’s hand from his arm and brought it to his lips to kiss her knuckles. “ I see someone I must talk to. Samantha, I’m sure you can help them with any questions they may have?”
“ I’m sure,” Sam repeated, shaking her head a little at him as he sauntered away. She lifted her eyes to the people before her with an apologetic smile. “ You’ll have to excuse him. I’m afraid he started celebrating before everyone else.”
“ Any particular reason?” Gardam asked mildly, her animosity towards Sam visible in the air between them.
Sam gave the woman a cold smile, unable to forgive her for her earlier lies. “ He’s a little upset,” she answered distractedly. “ He always gets like this when there’s a problem he can’t figure out.” She turned her eyes to Teal’c, the only one of her former team mates she hadn’t seen previously. “ Teal’c,” she gave him a genuinely warm smile. “ You look.. good.”
“ As do you, Major Carter.” Teal’c smiled a smile that was big by his standards and reached out to take her hand. Raising it to his lips, he kissed it softly. “ It is a joy to see you again.”
“ You, too.” Sam stood on her tiptoes and kissed his cheek softly, stifling a giggle at both his blush and Gardam’s pointed glare. She looked like she was about to say more when something over their shoulders caught her eye and she frowned.
Jack turned to see what she was frowning at and saw a young woman being hassled by an older looking man. He turned back to Sam with concern in his eyes. “ Carter?”
“ If you’ll excuse me,” Sam gave him a dazzling smile that he knew was forced and brushed past him, heading over to the couple so she could intervene in what was happening.
“ What was that about?” Jack asked nobody in particular as he watched Sam manoeuvre herself so she was in between the young woman and the man who had been holding her arm so roughly.
“ That’s Evelyn,” Daniel supplied helpfully. “ Nicholi’s.. girlfriend. She’s a courtesan and apparently Sam’s taken her under her wing.”
From a distance, they watched as Sam said a few choice words to the man in question, all three men recognising the dangerous expression on her face as she met the stranger’s heated glared with a steely stare of her own. Jack tensed when it looked like the man was going to strike her but he relaxed when the stranger seemed to realise where he was and backed off. “ Same old
Carter,” he whistled. “ Glad to see that hasn’t changed.” Daniel and Teal’c didn’t have to say anything but he knew they agreed.
Sam murmured a few words to the shaken Evelyn before wrapping an arm around her waist and leading her back to where they stood. “ I’m sorry about that,” she apologised with a strained smile. “ One thing you should be aware of is that these people get pretty.. barbaric when drunk. And no one usually remembers anything in the morning.”
“ Good stuff then,” Jack teased, feeling the need to see a genuine smile shape her lips. His comment achieved the desired effect and he couldn’t resist seeing if he could put her completely at ease like he used to be able to do. “ Almost as good as that stuff on P3X595?” He grinned when she blushed and threw him a look of mock-annoyance.
“ You’re never going to let me forget that, are you?” Sam asked, sharing a secret smile with him that annoyed Gardam to no end. She blushed again after a few moments, realising that she hadn’t been doing or saying anything, just staring at Jack. She felt slightly better on seeing the blush stain his cheeks, realising he’d been doing the same. Clearing her voice, she gave Evelyn’s arm a quick squeeze to assure the young woman she hadn’t forgotten she was there. “ This is Evelyn, by the way. Evie, you met Daniel already. This is Colonel O’Neill, Teal’c and Captain..?” Her voice trailed off as she realised she didn’t know the other woman’s name, only her rank.
“ Gardam,” Gardam supplied coolly. “ Captain Andrea Gardam.”
“ Nice to meet you.” Evelyn smiled shyly at them all, shuffling a little closer to Sam when they smiled back.
The music started up and they all turned to watch as several couples got up and moved to the centre of the room, smiling as they began to dance. There didn’t seem to be a set routine, some were waltzing, others were swaying, others were seemingly making up routines as the music played. Sam shook her head in amusement as the King moved to dance with Lady Hillcross, his sister-in-law, both of them swaying unintentionally as they tried to dance whilst sipping wine simultaneously.
“ Samantha.” Evelyn’s gasp was quiet but fearful. Sam looked away from the dancing and saw Lord Jalen, the man from earlier, approaching them.
“ Daniel,” she spoke up quickly. “ Would you mind dancing with Evelyn? Please?”
Daniel darted a glance in the direction Sam had looked and immediately understood. He turned to Evelyn and held out his hand. “ It would be my pleasure. I’m not a great dancer but from the looks of it, no one out there is.”
“ You’ll be in good company,” Sam assured him with a wink as Evelyn let go of her arm. “ Thank you.”
His response was an answering wink as he whisked Evelyn away and passed Lord Jalen on their way to the dance floor. Unfortunately, the man kept advancing on the group and Sam felt the first signs of panic sweep over her. Jalen was a man she knew mainly by reputation, the King had kept her as far away from him at all times. She knew he was married and regularly beat his wife and she also knew he suspected in the death of a courtesan many years or life cycles ago.
“ Carter?” Jack’s voice jolted her from her thoughts and she looked up to find him standing at her elbow. “ You want to go out there?” He motioned to the dancers casually, though his heart was beating a mile a minute at the possibility of rejection.
To his immense relief, she smiled gratefully and took his proffered arm, letting him lead her away from the approaching Lord. “ Thank you,” she murmured as they settled themselves on the dance floor, both deciding silently that they weren’t going to try anything more challenging than swaying gently in time to the music.
“ Anytime,” Jack said, meaning it with every fibre of his being. He watched with a large amount of satisfaction as Jalen stopped walking and glared at them before turning on his heel and marching out of the ballroom. “ So what’s the story with that guy?” He felt her shudder against him and pulled her closer. “ Sam?”
“ He’s just got a violent temper,” she explained, nestling her head against his shoulder, fighting the temptation to close her eyes. “ He’s the main suspect in the death of one of Velenthia’s most popular and famed courtesans.”
“ Has he ever..? Have you ever..?” Jack impulsively clasped her fingers to his heart, relieved beyond measures as he felt her shake his head against him. He lowered his head to hear her answer, his lips unintentionally brushing the bare skin of her neck.
“ The King does his best to keep me away from those he thinks will hurt me,” she answered softly. “ We made an agreement, when I first came here, that he’d make me as few.. appointments.. as possible if I agreed to spend most of my time with him.” She lifted her head to look into his eyes. “ And before you ask, no. My relationship with the King isn’t like that, contrary to popular belief. When I came here, he was still very vulnerable after his wife’s death. He was lonely and couldn’t really talk to anyone without fearing they were trying to get close to him for some ulterior purpose. For some reason, he trusted me not to do that. He trusted me to be a friend.”
“ You’re a friendly person,” Jack quipped, surprised when he felt her wince, realising his mistake when he saw the hurt in her eyes. “ Shit, Sam, I didn’t mean it like that. I wasn’t referring to you.. you know.”
“ Sleeping with men because I’m told to? Sleeping with them so they pay the King for the privilege?” She murmured, lowering her head back to his shoulder. “ You can’t be as ashamed of me for what I have to do than I am, Colonel.”
Once again, he tightened his grip on her, pulling her as close as he could. “ I’m not ashamed of you, Sam. You did what you had to do.”
“ Sure,” was all she said, closing her eyes tightly, willing the tears away until she was somewhere she could cry in private. They continued to dance in silence, unaware they were being watched by two pairs of disdainful eyes.
“ So the rumours are true,” Gardam muttered to herself, forgetting Teal’c was still there. She watched through thinly veiled jealousy as Colonel O’Neill pulled away ever so slightly and tipped up Major Carter’s face with a finger under her chin. There was no way she could hear what was being said but from the small, accepting smile on Major Carter’s face she gathered he
wasn’t making a comment about the décor.
“ Which rumours are they?” The deep, monotone voice took her by surprise and she jumped, clasping a hand to her heart as she glared at Teal’c. “ Captain Gardam?”
“ Nothing,” she snapped. “ It’s none of your business.”
“ On the contrary,” Teal’c responded calmly. “ If you were referring to rumours regarding either Colonel O’Neill or Major Carter then it is my business. They are my friends and that makes it so.”
Gardam chose to remain silent, her scowl deepening in place of words.
“ Might I remind you,” Teal’c continued, “ that they are both your superior officers. I know it to be fact that General Hammond does not tolerate the spreading of harmful rumours amongst his staff. Were he to learn of your involvement in such a matter you would be severely reprimanded.”
“ And how would General Hammond hear about it?” Gardam questioned matter-of-factly. “ Besides, who do you think he would trust? Me? Or an alien who turned against his own people at the drop of a hat?”
Teal’c stared at her for a minute, seemingly contemplating her question. Finally he turned to her, his face betraying nothing of how he felt. “ I do not believe I have ever heard the expression ‘the drop of a hat’. Perhaps you would explain it to me?”
Gardam growled in frustration and twirled away from him, her face set in a dark expression of anger.
“ Captain?” The use of her rank was a question and she knew it.
“ I’m going to get a drink!” She snapped callously. “ I’ll need one if I’m going to have to put up with you all night!”
With that, she stormed away towards the line of wine-filled goblets, the skirt of her dress swaying behind her. And if she’d chosen to look around, she would have been treated to a rare sight. The sight of a smugly beaming Jaffa.
Several minutes later, Teal’c was joined by both Jack and Daniel as the song ended. The two men reached their friend at the same time, both having been relieved of the women they had been dancing with; Sam had been whisked away by the King, Evelyn by Torin Kavise.
“ Where did Captain Gardam go?” Daniel looked puzzled on seeing the end of a smile play out on the normally stoic face.
“ I believe she went for nourishment.” Teal’c answered, barely managing to restrain another smile. “ Where are Major Carter and Evelyn?”
Daniel looked out on the dance floor and smiled. “ Evelyn was taken by Torin. He seems quite fond of her, looks like she’s perfect daughter-in-law material.” He looked to Jack, expecting the other man to answer and somewhat amused to find Jack’s attention was well and truly focused elsewhere. “ Earth to Jack, come in Jack.” He grinned when Jack, startled, managed to tear his eyes away from whatever or whomever he’d been staring at. “ Where’s Sam?”
“ Oh, the King wanted to dance with her,” Jack replied, making a face. “ You can’t really turn down a King, can you?”
“ Not at his own party,” Daniel added, his eyes scouring the crowd for their friend. He smiled when he saw her standing comfortably in the King’s embrace, noting with some pleasure that there was more distance between Sam and the King than there had been between Sam and Jack. A considerable distance. “ She looks good, doesn’t she?”
“ She looks beautiful,” Jack murmured, distracted by her once more.
“ It appears she has been well looked after,” Teal’c put in. “ She does not seem harmed due to her time here.”
“ No,” Jack sighed softly. “ And maybe that’s half the problem.” He looked at his friends and noticed their confusion, seeing he had to explain a little more. “ Think about it. She’s been hurt countless times back home, through working at the SGC. She’s found somewhere here where someone can protect her from almost all of that. If that were one of you, would you be so willing to give it up?”
Neither Daniel nor Teal’c had an answer. He wasn’t expecting them to. He sighed again and turned his attention back to Sam and the way she smiled at something the King had said.
It would take time to convince her leaving was the best thing for her, time to convince her they wouldn’t let this happen again, time to find a way to get round whatever was preventing the King from letting her go.
It was time worth spending, in Jack’s opinion. All it had taken was holding her in his arms again to bring home what he had been on the verge of realising the night before. That Sam was a woman who was worth waiting for, she was *definitely* worth waiting for, and definitely worth whatever pains they had to go to in order to bring her home.
~*~
“ I'm waiting for you, biding my time
Keeping my heart from crossing over the line
Counting the days until my dream comes true
I'm waiting for you.”
~ ‘Waiting for You’, Alecia Elliot
~*~
~*~
Part Seven.
~*~
“ It’s so hard, to believe,
I don’t have you right beside me.
As I long to touch you,
But you’re out of my reach.”
~ ‘Just to Hold You Once Again’, Mariah Carey
~*~
Well into the night, the ball was still going strong. Sam hadn’t stopped dancing all night, mainly with the King, so she was grateful when Lady Hillcross took pity on her and whisked the King away, sending her a wink. Smiling to herself, Sam picked up a goblet of wine and made her way over to door that led onto the balcony, standing close to them so she could feel the cool
breeze cleanse her skin. She closed her eyes and sipped her wine, relishing a few moments alone.
“ Samantha!” Her eyes opened to find Lord Davin, one of the few men the King allowed her to tend to, standing in front of her. He was a gentle man, a widower since his wife had died several life cycles ago and was very fond of Sam. He reached out for her hand and raised it to his lips. “ You look most becoming.” He winked. “ I can certainly understand why the King wishes to keep you to himself.”
“ I wasn’t aware that was what he wished,” Sam answered smoothly, smiling demurely. She glanced over his shoulder quickly, trying to find her team mates, half-hoping they wouldn’t see her talking with Lord Davin and jump to the right conclusions, still uncomfortable with them knowing what she did.
Lord Davin grinned. “ He has explicitly told me you are unavailable for several sun-cycles. I assumed that was so he could keep you to himself since no one else I have spoken to has been successful in arranging a meeting with you.” He followed her line of eyesight and found himself looking at one of the visitors to Velenthia, the man who the King introduced as being Colonel,
the leader of the strangers. “ Or perhaps he has decided your services are required elsewhere.”
Sam blushed and lowered her gaze. “ I don’t know why you assume he would assign me to something so important.”
“ Samantha, my dear,” Lord Davin slipped his arm around her waist. “ Look around. The women here who aren’t courtesans envy your beauty and wit. Every man in this room is a little bit in love with you. There is *no* one else the King or Velenthia’s people would trust to win the affections of our city’s new acquaintances.”
“ That’s flattering.” Her eyes sparkled as she caught sight of Lady Hillcross leaving the King in someone else’s arms and head over to them, recalling how the King had mentioned his sister-in-law’s interest in the widower. “ Now it’s your turn to be flattered. Lady Hillcross is on her way over.”
“ Lady Hillcross.” Lord Davin repeated, looking a little worried. “ She has been most fervent in her pursuit of me, Samantha. If you excuse me, I think I need to find somewhere to hide.” The man was walking away before she could respond, leaving Sam standing alone and attempting to hide a smile behind her goblet as Lady Hillcross walked passed, obviously looking for
someone.
“ I don’t know what there is to smile about now that you’re a professional whore.” Sam turned to see Captain Gardam standing at her side, her eyes slightly glazed as she poured half of her wine down her throat in one fell-swoop.
“ When the only choice you have is between this and death, ask me that question again,” Sam retorted sharply, adopting a defensive posture. She focused her attention on Gardam and the spite in the other woman’s eyes so did not see her former team mates approaching as if to intervene if necessary.
“ I’d rather die than sell my body..” Captain Gardam continued haughtily, looking down her nose at Sam. “ It compromises everything I believe. I don’t know how you look yourself in the mirror.” Her loathing was obvious, as she looked Sam up and down, her frown deepening.
Sam sighed inwardly. It wasn’t unexpected, this small-minded attitude. In the early days of her life on Velenthia, she’d thought about it a lot. That was when she still believed there was a chance she would manage to make it home, when she thought the biggest problem she would face was dealing with the reaction of her colleagues. That was before she’d realised that she
couldn’t go home, before she’d grown to understand how the system of Velenthia worked. “ The Air Force teaches us to do whatever necessary to survive,” she told Captain Gardam matter-of-factly. “ Besides, if you don’t laugh or smile, you cry. And that’s a weakness you can’t afford in a place like this.” Her tone was wistful, sad.
Gardam didn’t notice it but her team mates did. “ A weakness?” Gardam scoffed, not giving Sam’s words time to sink in or not wanting to admit they were right. “ To admit you don’t want to be here?”
“ To show vulnerability in front of these people,” Sam clarified. “ They’ll prey on that. Several men in this room are addicted to power and control.” Her eyes moved from man to man, having been warned of who they were by the King who was determined to keep her from them. “ They’ve killed their lovers in the past, either because of jealousy, because they enjoy it or
because they’re too drunk to know what they’re doing. If you want to live in this world, you have to accept how it is. Any sign of weakness.. It’s like signing your own death certificate.” She gazed down into her goblet at the deep red liquid there. “ It’s better to live and embrace the ways they’ve used here for years when the only other option is dying on the streets from hunger when you’re open to being attacked and raped and murdered.”
Even Gardam seemed a little moved by her explanation. There was a pregnant pause between Sam’s answer and the woman’s next comment. “ I still don’t know how you do it.”
Sam raised her head and gave Gardam a wryly smile. “ Neither do I,” she admitted softly, her eyes stinging. She cleared her voice to rid her throat of the lump gathered there. “ Now if you’ll excuse me..” She didn’t know where she was going to go but on noticing her former team mates and seeing the sympathy in their eyes, she knew she just had to get out of there.
Luckily, it seemed someone was on her side. “ Samantha!” The voice was barely above a whisper and Sam looked to the doors leading to the balcony to see Nicholi peeking in, gesturing wildly with his hands.
“ Nicholi..” She frowned slightly and walked over to him, glancing around to make sure Nicholi’s father nor the King were watching her. “ What are you doing here?” It was very rare for a young man like Nicholi to receive an invite to a social event at the palace unless he was working and Sam knew for a fact that he wasn’t.
“ I need to talk to you..” Nicholi whispered urgently, his eyes bright with excitement, his whole face lit up.
“ I can’t right now..” Sam answered in a low voice, smiling at a man who passed them and gave them a curious glance.
Nicholi was insistent. “ Then tonight?”
“ I can’t.” Sam shook her head, knowing the King expected her to accompany Jack back to his room and would not permit her seeing anyone else, especially not Nicholi whom in the King’s eyes was not good enough for her.
“ But I need to tell you something!” Nicholi proclaimed desperately.
Sam sighed tolerantly. “ Okay,” she murmured patiently, darting a quick look around them. Luckily, the only people who seemed interested in the conversation were SG-1 and she doubted they would want to get Nicholi in trouble. “ Tell me now.”
“ I did it!” Nicholi beamed, barely able to contain his excitement. “ I asked Evie to marry me! She said yes!” His eyes were round and happy but the way he was looking at her reminded her of the way a puppy looked when it wanted recognition for doing something good.
“ That’s wonderful!” On impulse, Sam leaned over and hugged him momentarily, her enthusiasm genuine. She knew it hadn’t been easy for Nicholi and Evelyn and she knew from experience how hard it was when you loved someone you weren’t allowed to be with. She sincerely hoped everything would work out for the two of them; if her own life was never going to be as perfect as she’d dreamed as a child, she wanted to know someone else’s would be. “ I’m so happy for the two of you!”
“ I know.” Nicholi grinned proudly. “ As soon as I have saved enough to buy her from the King, we’re going to use the Great Ring in the way you showed me and be free.” His plan was sound but there was one problem - Sam knew he would need more money than he anticipated to buy Evelyn and she knew it wouldn’t be easy for him to raise it.
“ How much do you need to buy Evelyn?” She asked softly.
“ Not so much..” Nicholi shrugged, not wanting to dwell on that. “ I will have saved enough in one moon cycle.”
Sam wasn’t convinced. “ Hmm..” She narrowed her eyes as the wheels in her head started turning.
“ Hmm?” Nicholi looked at her questioningly, wondering why her brow was furrowed.
“ I think I *might* have a way to get you two out of here sooner than that.” She gave him a reassuring smile. “ Give me a few days.. er.. sun-cycles..” she corrected herself, wondering why she’d made the mistake when she’d been having no problem grasping the differences in language between Velenthia and Earth – before her team mates showed up anyway. “ Now go,” she
told him. “ Before anyone else sees you.”
“ Yes.” Nicholi nodded in agreement and smiled. “ Thank you, Samantha.”
She watched him slip fully out of the doors and practically skip down the stairs into the palace gardens, smiling when he stopped at the gates to wave and was soon on his way again. Just as she was about to turn away from the doors, she noticed she wasn’t quite as alone on the balcony as she’d thought. Squinting in the light of the moon, she tried to discern who the two
figures going down the stairs to the garden were, wondering where they’d been hiding throughout her conversation with Nicholi.
The more she stared at them, the clearer they became and she realised they weren’t talking amicably as they walked, they were arguing, and it looked like the taller, more masculine figure was pushing the smaller in front of him. A gasp caught in her throat as the smaller, feminine figure stepped into a pool of moonlight and she realised it was Evelyn. Her fear grew when she recognised the man as being Lord Jalen.
As quickly as she could, she left the ballroom and started after them, dropping her goblet with a small clatter as she went. Her anger and fear grew as she witnessed Lord Jalen strike Evelyn and send her to her knees, towering over he as he leant down to shout something.
She got to them just as Jalen raised a knife, the vicious looking blade glinting in the moonlight as she approached quietly. “ I wouldn’t do that if I were you.” She used his being distracted by her voice to make a grab for the hand holding the knife, keeping his arm still in a strong vice-like grip that took him by surprise and prevented him from bringing it down on Evelyn.
Jalen straightened and glared at her, taking a menacing step closer. “ You’d rather it were you?” He growled threateningly.
Sam refused to be intimidated by him, having seen and fought against much stronger men in her time with the Air Force. Her lack of evident fear only served to anger him more, as did her flippant answer. “ Not particularly.”
“ Maybe I should give you a good time,” Jalen leered, taking another step closer but Sam refused to be scared and move away. “ You could demonstrate why you’re so special.. Why you’re too good for me to go through the King.”
“ I think you should get back to your wife before she realises you’re gone, Lord Jalen.” She responded calmly, taking one side step as he made a lunge for her. It was then Lord Jalen looked up to find they were no longer alone.
“ This is none of your business,” he seethed, his attention diverted from Sam to the five men standing before him, allowing to go to Evelyn’s side. “ The whores will be free another time.”
The King stepped forward, a dangerous glint in his piercing blue eyes that Sam had never before seen. “ On the contrary.” When he spoke, his tone was carefully measured and full of authority. “ It is my business. I suggest you heed the Lady’s warning and leave.”
“ Lady?” Lord Jalen snorted. “ *Her*?”
“ Jalen.” The King spoke in a venomously quiet voice. “ Your behaviour is disgraceful and an insult to your fellow Lords. I suggest you take your leave or I shall be forced to have you escorted from the grounds.” He met Jalen’s eyes without flinching. “ I think you will agree that is a humiliation your wife deserves to be spared?”
“ Fine.” Jalen glowered at being chided like a child in front of so many people and brusquely pushed his way past Sam. “ We’ll finish this later,” he spat at her as he left.
“ No, you won’t,” the King murmured quietly. He walked to Sam, who was standing over a still-sitting Evelyn. “ Samantha?” Concern appeared in his eyes. “ He did not hurt you?”
Sam gave him a grateful smile and pushed at the strand of hair that had escaped from the restraints of its clip. “ No, your Majesty. I’m fine, thank you.” She cast a look at Evelyn, who was obviously deeply shaken. “ If I may.. I’d like to take Evelyn to my room and see to her injuries?”
“ Of course.” Relief flooded his features as he assured himself Sam was okay. Sensing her need to be alone with Evelyn, he turned to his companions, amongst which were SG-1. “ The rest of us shall return to the.. party.”
Smiling at his use of the ‘Earth’ word, Sam crouched down to be closer to Evelyn, noticing how – predictably – Jack lingered behind. She reached out to Evelyn, putting a calming hand on the young woman’s arm. “ Evie? Come on, Honey,” she coaxed gently. “ Party’s over. Jalen’s gone.”
Evelyn took her hands away from her face, her face deathly pale, her body trembling. “ Really?”
“ Yes, he’s gone,” Sam assured her. “ Come on.” She eased Evelyn up into a sitting position and then helped her stand on weak legs. Evelyn swayed unsteadily as Sam tried to support her. She would have fallen if Jack hadn’t hurried to her other side and put an arm around her waist. Sam smiled at him warmly, the kind of smile he’d lay away thinking about when it sunk in he might not see it again. “ Thank you.”
“ No problem.” He met her eyes over Evelyn’s head, asking her without words if the young woman was okay.
Sam nodded though her eyes were worried. “ Will you help me get her to my room?”
“ Sure.” He figured she was going to need help, Evelyn seemed to have lapsed into a state of shock.
Slowly, they made their way into the palace through another entrance Sam knew about so they could avoid putting Evelyn through the strain of having to see other people in her condition. Jack was quiet as he helped Sam take Evelyn inside, trying to keep track of how many twists and turns they took. He listened as Sam murmured soothing words of comfort and reassurance to the young woman he could still feel trembling.
“ Almost there,” Sam murmured, having chosen to go the easiest way, avoiding the spiral staircase. To her, it felt like Evelyn could collapse at moment. They made it to her room and she found the key in its hiding place – underneath the glass cover of an oil lamp by the door – and made short work of unlocking the door. Ushering both Jack and Evelyn in, she walked Evelyn
over to the bed and helped the young woman lie down. Stroking her hair from her face, she leaned down to brush a soft kiss to Evelyn’s forehead. “ I’m just going to go and get you a change of clothes, okay? Colonel O’Neill will stay with you and make sure no one else comes in.”
Evelyn nodded but remained silent. Her eyes shimmered and her lip quivered. Sam felt anger swell up inside her at what had happened and almost happened and left the room wordlessly so she could get a grip on it. She was still inwardly fuming at the injustice of it all when she returned five minutes later with a bowl of icy water, some clothes and Karalynn in tow.
She stopped in her tracks at what she saw, a fond smile arranging her features as her anger was temporarily forgotten. Evelyn was crying steadily, crying out all of her fears and frustrations, clinging onto Colonel O’Neill as though he were her lifeline. Sam knew the feeling. He had easily slipped into the role of a parent, as he often did around children and young adults, and was rocking her comfortingly, rubbing her back as she cried her heart out.
As Sam felt a surge of affection well up within her, Jack lifted his head and his eyes locked with hers. They stared into each other’s eyes, both smiling shyly until Karalynn discreetly coughed and nudged Sam in the waist.
“ Samantha?” Karalynn did her best to hide a smile.
“ Oh.” A deep red blush flooded Sam’s face. “ Sorry. Karalynn, this is Colonel Jack O’Neill. Colonel, this is Karalynn. She’s my..”
“ Personal aide,” Karalynn supplied helpfully, knowing Sam hated to refer to her as that. “ It’s nice to meet you, Colonel.” She bustled over to the bed and sat down on Evelyn’s other side, cajoling the young woman into letting go off Jack, wrapping her in a motherly embrace instead. “ My poor Evelyn,” Karalynn fussed. “ Lets get you into something more comfortable, hmm? We’ll get you cleaned up and comfortable in no time.”
The bed jolted as Jack stood, the room falling quiet as Evelyn’s sobs subsided and she hid her swollen eyes against Karalynn. Unsure of what to do, Jack stood awkwardly to one side as Sam took the water over to the bed, putting it down on a small table as she reached for a cloth. He watched as she dipped the edges of the material into the water and then, with Karalynn’s help, moved Evelyn so she had access to the young woman’s face.
As gently as she could, Sam washed away the traces of dirt and tearstains that streaked Evelyn’s face. Once her face was clean, Sam rinsed the cloth and moistened it fully, bringing it back to Evelyn’s face to lay it softly against the bruise that was forming on Evelyn’s cheekbone. “ It’ll help the swelling,” Sam explained at Karalynn’s enquiring expression. “ It’s an Earth thing.”
“ Ah.” Karalynn smiled at that and threw Jack a speculative glance. “ Speaking of ‘Earth things’, why don’t you go? I am sure I can take care of Evelyn alone.” Evelyn nodded in agreement but Sam hesitated. “ Samantha, do not let Lord Jalen ruin your evening any more than he has done.” She smiled encouragingly. “ We will be fine.”
Still seeming unsure, Sam got to her feet. “ Okay.. But stay here tonight, okay? No one will bother either of you if you stay in here and you can always lock the door.”
“ We will stay,” Karalynn assured her. “ Now go,” she ordered with a smile and a wink. “ Your Colonel will not be able to find his way back if you leave him to wander the palace hallways alone.”
“ True.” Sam admitted, joining Jack by the door. “ But if anything happens or you need me for anything..”
“ We will know where to find you,” Karalynn laughed. “ You worry too much. Evelyn and I will be well without you looking after us for a little while.”
“ Okay.” Sam nodded, starting when Jack slipped his hand in hers and opened the door, tugging on her hand to get her to follow. “ Be careful and lock the door after I’ve gone!” Her only answer was another chuckle as she was pulled fully into the hallway, the door closing behind her. She saw Jack’s expression of amusement and frowned. “ What?”
He shook his head, grinning. “ Nothing.” He still hadn’t let go of her hand. “ So.. Which way is it?”
“ The ballroom?” Assuming that was where he wanted to go, she started down the hallway, pulling him along behind her since he was unwilling to drop her hand. She had to stop, however, when she realised he was standing still, just looking at her with an unfathomable face arranging his features. “ What?” She repeated, an edge of exasperation creeping into her voice.
To her surprise, his face flushed with embarrassment. “ I was thinking.. maybe.. we could go back to my room.” She arched an eyebrow and his flush deepened. “ To talk,” he clarified, ducking his head and missing the small smile that momentarily played on her lips before she got her expression under control again.
“ Okay, then.” She gave him a one-shouldered shrug when his head shot up in surprise. “ But it’s still this way.” Still holding hands, Sam and Jack made their way through the Palace, choosing to remain silent rather than fill the lull in conversation with meaningless small talk, each seeming lost in a world of their own.
~*~
They made it to Jack’s room without using words and without running into anyone. Smiling sheepishly, Jack motioned for her to enter first and with a small smile in response, she did. He watched, intrigued, as she moved immediately to the oil lamp and lit it, filling the room with companionable warmth as well as a little light.
Closing the door on the outside world, he turned around to see she’d removed her shoes and was in the process of removing several clips from her hair, letting it fall down around her shoulders in loose curls. He stood open-mouthed, transfixed by the sight of her face illuminated by the oil lamp until she looked up and caught him staring, her cheeks flooding with warmth.
“ You don’t mind, do you?” She asked quietly. “ The shoes are worse than the ones with my dress uniform and these clips have been digging into my head all night. I’m pretty sure a couple of them pierced some holes through my scalp, too,” she added, gingerly running her fingers through her hair to make sure she hadn’t missed any. She’d learned the hard way how much it hurt when you rolled over and felt a stray pin dig into your neck in the middle of the night.
“ No. Of course not.” Jack shook his head to clear the inappropriate thoughts he’d been having. He followed her example and took off his shoes and jacket, unbuttoning the top three buttons of his shirt as he got on the bed beside her.
Pulling her feet up onto the bed, Sam curled up beside him, propping her elbow up on the pillow, resting her head on her hand. “ So.”
“ So.” He shifted until he was lying on his side facing her, gazing into her azure eyes, having to remind himself that although she looked like Sam the woman, he hoped to have her back as Carter his second-in-command soon so he couldn’t do half of the things running through his mind that his subconscious was telling him to do.
“ So you wanted to talk?” She stifled a yawn with her hand and blinked once to clear her vision, feeling too comfortable where she was, knowing if they didn’t start talking soon, she was going to fall asleep. Her eyes slid shut only to snap open again instantly as she shuddered, feeling anger coarse through her veins once more as she remembered Lord Jalen and what he had almost done to Evelyn.
Inching closer, he reached out and touched her cheek, his brow furrowed with concern, having seen and felt her jolt out of her drowsy state. “ Sam? What’s wrong?” She didn’t answer, she just twisted away from his touch so she was lying on her back, staring up at the ceiling. “ Is it that Jalen guy?” She shrugged but remained silent. “ Is it Evelyn? Are you worried about her?”
“ She’s just a child,” Sam murmured sorrowfully. “ She doesn’t deserve any of this, it’s not her fault she was born into this kind of life.”
“ How was she born into it?” He waited for her answer, observing the play of emotions that passed over her face.
Sighing, she shrugged despondently. “ Evelyn’s mother was a courtesan. When Evelyn was born, her mother needed money to fund some addiction she had. At that time the Queen was still alive and because she wanted to make sure Evelyn was well looked after, they made a deal. Evelyn’s mom would hand over the rights to Evelyn to the Queen in exchange for money. A few moon-cycles.. erm.. months.. later Evelyn’s mother ran off with one of the men she saw on a regular basis.” Sam closed her eyes against the tears she felt forming. “ She never came back so Evelyn was passed from one courtesan to the other, each of them promising to train her in the way of a courtesan and all of them failing, only to move her around again in a few months
time. Then the Queen died and all courtesans were moved here by the King, who made sure Evelyn was relatively well looked after.” She opened her eyes, wiping at a stray tear that had managed to escape. She turned her head and looked imploringly at him. “ Evelyn had no say in what happened to her. She was born into this life, born to *do* this kind of work. It isn’t fair,
Jack,” she murmured, the use of his first name unintentional but unavoidable. “ No one should have to go through what she’s been through. She has the potential to be so much more if only she was given the chance.”
Jack brought his hand back to her face to catch another tear with his thumb. “ Sounds like you want to stay as much for Evelyn’s sake than anyone else’s.”
“ Actually.” Sam turned again so she was facing him, her eyes alight with an idea in the manner he used to love seeing. “ I was thinking,” she began quietly, licking her lips in the unconscious way she did when she was trying to convince someone to do something for her. “ You could help me make sure Evelyn’s safe at the same time as helping her and Nicholi be together.”
“ Oh?” He tried to stop being distracted by her lips but it was proving a little too difficult as her tongue slipped out to moisten them again as she moved a tiny bit closer. Clearing his throat, he moved over to lie on his back, concentrating on the ceiling and mentally counting to ten. “ How could I do that?”
“ You could take them with you,” Sam answered matter-of-factly, resting on her elbows so she could look down on him, her face barely inches from his. “ You could include Evelyn in your trade agreement, the King will be able to let her go, and then you can take both Evelyn and Nicholi back to Earth with you. They’d be safe there, and free to be together. It’s the perfect
solution.” To support herself, she put a hand on his chest, her fingers moving of their own accord as they inched closer to the top of his open shirt. It was a method she had found useful in convincing her lovers of the past to do things for her and maybe it was the wine she’d consumed or the leftover adrenaline from her encounter with Lord Jalen but Sam was feeling a little.. reckless.
Confused, Jack caught her hand and held it still against him. “ Why will the King let Evelyn go and not you?”
“ Because he can’t let me go,” Sam responded without hesitation. She sighed and moved so she was lying on her back again. “ I’m not only the King’s favourite, I’m also the favourite of most of the men who come here and ask to see a courtesan. It’s a little ironic considering I haven’t even met over half of them but I guess I’ve got something of a reputation. Because of that, the men I do see.. They pay a lot, which means more money for the King to use on looking after the other courtesans as well as everyone in the city. I’m too expensive for him to simply let go and if I tried to leave without his permission and succeeded.. He would be seen as an incompetent King and would be stripped of his title – by his own son – and thrown onto the streets to die a disrespectful death.” She tilted her face to see his reaction. “ I can’t let that happen to him, Colonel. He’s done so much for me, protecting me from anyone he thought would hurt me, including his own son. I can’t let him lose everything he has just so I can go home. After his wife died, his position as King is the only thing that matters to him.”
“ Or it was until you came along,” Jack added. “ He really cares a lot about you.”
“ As I do him,” she responded simply and honestly. “ He’s like another father to me. I’d have died a long time ago if he hadn’t taken me in.”
“ You remind him of his wife.” Jack stated. “ But he said you were more like a daughter than anything else.”
“ The daughter they never had.” Sam smiled and nodded, having heard it before. “ I suppose you’re wondering about the Queen, aren’t you? About how she died?”
Smiling depreciatively, Jack bobbed his head. “ It had crossed my mind.”
“ She’s part of why he feels guilty about not being able to give me my freedom,” she started to explain in a quiet, subdued manner. “ In the same way his duty is coming before my freedom now, he put his duty as King before her happiness and he has never forgiven himself for that. She died without him after an accident that happened on a vacation they were both supposed to
be on but he chose to miss because of some royal obligations.” Sighing, she shook her head. “ He blames himself for not being there, he thinks if he had been she would still be alive.”
“ Would she?”
“ No.” Sadness flittered across her features. “ There was nothing anyone could have done from what Karalynn told me. It was a tragic accident, one that couldn’t have been prevented.” They lapsed into silence as her words sunk in and Jack was forced to admit how they applied to a tragic event that had happened in his life years earlier. Once again, it was Sam’s voice that jolted him from his musings. “ So. Can you help me?”
Shifting to look into her hopeful, trusting big blue eyes, Jack knew he could never say no to her. Scolding himself mentally for being so easy to convinced, he took her hand from where it had strayed back to his chest as he’d turned on his side and squeezed her fingers. “ Fine. When the King and I sit down to talk about a trade, I’ll be sure to make sure Evelyn is included in
it. But,” he added, seeing her eyes light up, his expression turning entirely serious as he stared into her eyes. “ I will take Evelyn and Nicholi back through the Stargate with SG-1 but I still have absolutely *no* intention of leaving here without you.” Moving to lie on his back, he pulled her with him, her head coming to rest in the crook of his neck as though it were the most natural thing in the world. “ There’ll be a way to get round everything keeping you here, Sam. We just have to find it.”
Promising himself as well as her, Jack was able to fall into a deep, peaceful state of slumber. Sam, however, lay awake with her head on his shoulder, feeling his heartbeat beneath her palm, trying not to get her hopes up.
Even if she was somehow able to go home, she wasn’t sure whether she would. She had changed too much, been through too much. She knew Captain Gardam’s reaction would just be the first of many once people learned about the role she had had to adopt in Velenthia and the more she thought about it, the more it seemed that it was a humiliation her team mates deserved to be spared.
~*~
“ Tonight it's very clear
As we're both lying here
There's so many things I want to say
I will always love you
I would never leave you alone.”
~ ‘Glory of Love’, Peter Cetera.
~*~
~*~
Part Eight
~*~
“ She leads me through moonlight, Only to burn me with the sun
She's taken my heart, But she doesn't know what she's done
Feel her breath on my face, Her body close to me
Can't look in her eyes, She's out of my league
Just a fool to believe, I have anything she needs
She's like the wind.”
~ ‘She’s Like the Wind’, Patrick Swayze
~*~
Something was missing.
The same warmth and weight that had been missing the previous morning was again absent as he opened his eyes and reached out, grasping nothing but a fist full of cool sheets.
Sam was gone. Again.
Glancing around the room, he found there was not one single trace of her ever having been there. He sighed heavily, bring his hands to lie behind his head as he closed his eyes again, shutting out the light that streamed in through the windows.
She kept leaving him, and he couldn’t pretend it didn’t hurt.
A thousand thoughts ran through his mind as he lay there alone, most of them concentrating on one blond Major who didn’t seem to want to go back. He’d noticed she hadn’t replied when he’d made his vow, when he’d said he would stop at nothing to bring her home, and he couldn’t help but get the feeling what he’d said to Teal’c and Daniel hadn’t been too far off the actual
truth.
The King offered her a good home with luxuries she couldn’t have on Earth. He offered her protection from any foreseeable dangers and would probably lay down his own life to save her from any harm. She seemed happy here, content. And she was more relaxed than Jack had ever seen her. In truth, he had started seeing a whole new side of her since finding her in his room two nights ago.
Groaning, Jack lifted one of the pillows and buried his head under it, trying not to inhale the still lingering trails of her lightly scented perfume. It felt like he’d been there a lot longer than just three days.
In his mind, when he pictured finding Sam again, he’d imagined she’d be pleased to see them and that they’d be leaving for home within the hour of finding her. He imagined her face lighting up with relief and joy at having been found; maybe she’d even hug each of them enthusiastically and thank them for not giving up on her.
He had never pictured her being reluctant to leave, and yet that was what he’d found.
Maybe it would be better if she did stay on Velenthia, that was what the traitorous, doubtful voice in his head said. She was happy here, and she’d changed a lot. He honestly didn’t know whether the changes in her attitude and appearance would make it hard for her to get back into the swing of how things were on Earth, and he doubted they made it easier for her to leave. On
Velenthia, she was relatively free to be who she wanted to be. No expectations to live up to, no needing to prove herself worthy of what little acclaim she got, no pressure to find a miracle within a matter of hours or minutes to save the lives of the people she cared about.
Thinking about it with a sinking heart, Jack made a list of all the reasons for her to stay and all the reasons for her to come home and was disheartened to find the list for staying was longer than the one for going.
On Earth, as much as he’d like to, he couldn’t protect her. He could make sure she was never hurt, he couldn’t control what happened to her. He had no right to tell her what to do outside the SGC and even within the SGC, there would be times when he had no choice but to send her into situations he knew she might not survive.
He couldn’t give her all she needed and all she wanted. He couldn’t give her security and peace of mind and a life free of danger, pain and pressure. The King could. He couldn’t give her the luxurious clothing or jewellery or pampering the King did. Well, he could, but he knew she wouldn’t accept them.
Searching his mind, Jack found he couldn’t give Sam a reason to want to leave with him.
There was seeing Cassandra and Janet, and her friends and family but the King had once again gone one step above him and granted permission for anyone who wanted to visit Sam to come and go as they pleased.
How could he compete with everything the King offered? How could he, a battle-worn Colonel with more emotional baggage than anyone else he knew, compete with a King who had a whole Kingdom to give her? The only thing he had that the King didn’t have was himself and because of the regulations he had vowed to uphold and had been taught to respect, he couldn’t even give her that.
And without that, there was nothing else.
Nothing he could give her, no reason for her coming home.
She was safer here and he was a selfish fool for trying to take her away from another home she obviously loved and felt comfortable in.
Swallowing the lump in his throat, Jack pushed the pillow to one side and sat up on the bed, rubbing his eyes with his hands as his hope turned into helplessness. He would keep his promise to her and take Evelyn and Nicholi back to Earth with him. He wouldn’t pressure her to leave with him, he couldn’t knowing she was where she wanted to be. He would tell Generals Hammond and Carter all of what had happened and tell them they were free to visit her when they wanted to.
But he would never return to Velenthia. Not unless someone sent word that Sam was asking for him.
It would just be too hard, feeding a fantasy that could no longer exist.
~*~
The King kept his promise and allowed Sam to see SG-1 whenever she wanted to. She joined them for breakfast and, in the King’s absence, took Evelyn with her, wanting to keep the young woman close to her at all times out of fear that Lord Jalen would show up to finish what he’d started and she wouldn’t be there to prevent it again.
“ I’m sorry the King won’t be joining you this morning,” Sam apologised, her eyes twinkling mischievously as she sat down next to Evelyn, sharing a knowing smile with the young woman. “ I’m afraid he’s.. still feeling a little delicate after last night’s party.”
“ I know what he means,” Daniel grumbled as his stomach lurched at the sight of all the food on the table. He pushed his chair away and stood, walking over to the two comfortable chairs by the unlit fire where he collapsed rather ungracefully. “ I think I’ll stay over here while you guys eat.”
“ How much did he have to drink last night?” Sam asked Jack and Teal’c quietly as she reached for a piece of fruit.
Jack shrugged, a sombre air hanging about him as Teal’c answered her question. “ I believe I lost count after Daniel Jackson had finished his fifth helping of wine.”
“ Five?” Sam arched an eyebrow and stifled a smile. “ When that’ll teach him.” She turned to Evelyn when she noticed her friend wasn’t eating anything, just staring blindly at the empty plate before her. “ Evie? You feeling okay?”
Evelyn appeared startled by her voice and blushed lightly when she realised where she was. “ I.. I’m not very hungry this morning.”
“ You still look pale,” Sam mused, reaching out to see if she had a temperature. Her frown deepened when she felt Evelyn was a little warmer than normal. “ After breakfast we’ll go out and get some fresh air. If you still don’t feel well, I’ll take you to Corlinetta.”
“ Corlin-who?” For the first time since stepping foot into the room and sitting at the table, Captain Gardam spoke.
“ Corlinetta,” Sam repeated. “ She’s the nearest thing to a Doctor Velenthia has.”
A shadow crossed Gardam’s face and even Jack looked up in surprise. “ We were told yesterday by one our guides that Velenthia has advanced medical technology. That’s why we’re interested in trading technologies with them to mark an alliance.” Gardam answered slowly, her gaze accusing and aimed at Sam. “ If that’s not true, why should we bother sending a diplomatic team through the ’Gate after we leave if there’s nothing Velenthia can give us?”
Sam rolled her eyes and scowled. “ I know it’s been a long time since I was with the SGC but I seem to remember it didn’t matter whether a planet had technology to share to become an ally. So not that it matters, but what you were told is true. Velenthia does have some medical technologies that I’m sure will benefit Earth greatly but they’re not available to anyone. The
medical facility is situated in the basement of the palace but only Lords, Ladies, Royalty and anyone else who can afford to pay extortionate amounts benefit from it. Courtesans, and people like the Kavise family, have no choice but to go to people like Corlinetta who make do with what little they can find.”
“ I bet that doesn’t apply to you, though, does it?” Gardam narrowed her eyes, her tone scathing. “ I mean, the King’s favourite, the most popular whore.. Surely your health is important to these guys, right? Can’t have you passing on things from one guy to the next.”
Jack’s head snapped up as he gave Gardam a look that could kill. “ Captain..” It was a warning, one the Captain took no notice of.
“ Aren’t you at all concerned, Sir?” Gardam asked curtly. “ I mean, you of all people should be aware of how many people she’s been with and what diseases she might have. You have spent the last two nights with her, I assume she lived up to her reputation and gave you good value for money, even if you weren’t the one paying her.” She smirked at Sam. “ Unless of course you couldn’t go through with it. Maybe you think you’re too good for him now you’re sleeping with royalty?”
“ What I do and who I do it with is none of your business. I’m not going to dignify your prying into my personal life by giving you an answer.” Sam pushed her chair back and stood, glaring at Gardam. “ Nor am I going to tolerate your looking down on me or insulting me in my own home. So if you’ll excuse me, I need some fresh air.” She started for the door without looking back, her shoulders set determinedly.
“ I’m coming with you.” Evelyn hurriedly got to her feet, ignoring the wave of dizziness that crashed over her as she followed Sam from the room. “ Samantha?”
“ Yes?” Sam slowed her pace once they were in the hallway, sensing Evelyn’s struggle to keep up with her.
“ Why do you let that woman get to you?” Evelyn asked curiously, breathing deeply as she slowed down. “ And if she bothers you so much why don’t you have the King forbid her from staying here? You know you could do that easily..”
Shaking her head, Sam stopped walking to allow Evelyn to recover, inwardly scolding herself for getting Evelyn caught up in her own problems. “ I don’t know why I let her get to me, she just has this way..” She shook her head again and sighed heavily. “ I’d get her banished from the palace if I didn’t think it would give her a sense of satisfaction about being able to irritate me so much.”
“ Gardam irritates us all, even Teal’c,” the sound of Daniel coming up behind them made Evelyn jump as both courtesans turned to see both Daniel and Jack walking towards them. “ Mind if we join you? Teal’c said he’d try to keep Gardam in line.”
“ What about your breakfast?” Sam asked with a raised eyebrow. “ Or your plans for the day?”
“ Our plans for the day kinda included spending time with you,” Daniel told her with a grin. “ Unless you don’t want to..”
“ No, it’s not that.. I just thought there’d be something more interesting you’d want to do. Wouldn’t you rather spend the day in the library again?”
Daniel rolled his eyes. “ I’ve been studying artefacts and the history of both Earth and all the other planets we’ve come across for the last God-knows how many years of my life. I want to spend some time with my friend. *We* both want to spend some time with you,” he added, giving Jack a pointed stare. “ So. If you don’t mind..”
“ Colonel O’Neill and Doctor Jackson could join us on our.. picnic..” Evelyn suggested, struggling a little with the unusual word. “ We were going to dine with Nicholi near the river.”
“ There’s a river here?” Daniel’s eyes lit up. “ I haven’t seen any signs of one..”
“ It’s in the forest,” Sam informed him. “ The one that’s on the opposite side of Velenthia to the Stargate. It’s quite beautiful down there. Peaceful, too.” She smiled as Daniel grew more and more thrilled by the prospect. “ As Evelyn said you’re welcome to join us if you want. You can help us celebrate Evelyn and Nicholi’s engagement.”
“ Are you sure you don’t mind us intruding?” Jack asked, his question accompanied by an unreadable expression. “ If you’re going for a picnic, will there be enough for all of us?
Getting the impression the question was directed at Evelyn more than herself, Sam hesitated before answering, waiting to see if Evelyn chose to answer it or not. When the young woman remained silent, instead looking to her for guidance, she forced a small smile. “ It’s fine. We were going to get the food from the market on the way so there’ll be plenty.” She tried not to
acknowledge the hurt Jack’s apparent coldness caused her. “ We should be going, Nicholi said he’d meet us at the gates as soon as we were done with breakfast.”
Without saying anything else, Sam started walking away from them, leaving them no choice but to follow or be left behind. Evelyn was confused at the Colonel’s behaviour, having noticed the obvious undercurrent of *something*, whatever it was being something she couldn’t define, running between him and Samantha. Wordlessly, she followed Sam, leaving Daniel to glare at the Colonel for obviously hurting Sam before he, too, followed her lead.
Jack took a deep breath, the thought of being close to Sam for so long stirring both good and bad feelings within him. On one hand, he wanted to spend as much time as possible with her before he had to leave her behind. On the other, he knew being with her, making more memories of her, would just make it all the harder in the long run. He knew his coolness towards her
was both confusing and hurting her, but the spiteful part of his mind kept telling him he was just giving her a dose of her own medicine. The other part was the part he was beginning to listen to, which was why he started feeling guilty for having ignored her since she’d entered the dining room. She didn’t deserve it and he was causing her the exact thing he felt helpless about being unable to protect her from: pain.
Grinding his teeth and clenching his fists, he steeled himself for what was going to be a very long day and started after the others. At some point, he was going to have to explain his behaviour to her and let her know he would support her, no matter how hard it was, in whatever decision she made, whether she returned to Earth or stayed on Velenthia.
~*~
“ Have you been to the market since you got here?” Sam asked Daniel, who was walking beside her as Jack seemingly tried to keep his distance. “ Or any of the other parts of the city like the gardens or the shops or the public library?”
“ You mean the one in the palace..?” Daniel’s eyes widened as he stared at her in astonished shock. “ That was just.. That’s just the King’s library?”
Sam laughed at his reaction as they reached the first of the market stalls she wanted to go to. “ Daniel, the library in the palace is the King’s private library and one of many in Velenthia. I haven’t been to them all, but I’m told there are a lot of them around here. There’s one in the cathedral, one somewhere with the shops and I hear there are more in the other cities on the planet.”
“ You’re kidding me!” Daniel sounded amazed, almost dumbfound as he stared at her in awe. “ There’s seriously that many places to go around here? A cathedral? A market town *and* shops?”
“ Yes,” answered the woman behind the stall they were standing at, her eyes twinkling as she greeted Sam. “ But the shops cannot compare with my cooking, can they, Samantha?”
Smiling affectionately, Sam stepped behind the stall to accept the elderly woman’s embrace. “ Morning, Jeskia.” She kissed the older woman’s cheek before moving to stand beside Daniel. “ And no, there’s no way the shops can *ever* compare to your cooking.” She turned to Daniel and winked. “ Jeskia makes the best sandwiches you’ve ever tasted.”
“ Sandwiches,” Jeskia shook her head, smiling fondly. “ I will never understand your Earth-words, my child.”
“ I would never expect you to,” Sam told her sincerely. “ So, what’ve you got for us today?”
“ How many of you will be eating?” Jeskia enquired, her eyes travelling to Nicholi, Evelyn and finally Jack as he trailed behind them. “ All five of you?”
Sam nodded. “ Yep. We’re going to go down by the river so we thought we’d take some food and make a day of it.”
Jeskia smiled delightedly. “ Then I have just what you need.” The old woman bustled around her stall, picking up an array of different types of food, placing them all in a wicker basket, taking her time in deliberating over each item. When she was done, she handed the basket to Sam for inspection. “ Will this suit you, my child?”
“ It’s perfect, thank you,” Sam murmured in response after checking both Nicholi and Evelyn’s favourites were there. It was their celebration, after all. “ How much do I owe you?”
“ Samantha,” Jeskia shook her head and sighed. “How many times do I have to tell you, I still owe you for helping my boy. I will forever be in debt to you for that.”
“ Jeskia..” Sam wasn’t going to accept that as an answer. “ That happened moon-cycles ago. Please. Let me pay?”
“ My mind has been made,” Jeskia retorted, folding her arms across her chest. “ If you had not intervened, the Prince would have killed my son. For that I still owe you and I will be doing all I can to repay you until the day I died. Now,” she stared defiantly at Sam. “ Are you going to go and enjoy your meal or are you going to stand here and argue with me?”
Rolling her eyes, Sam took the basket and started to turn. “ Don’t think this is over, Jeskia. You can’t live your life in debt to me. I didn’t even *do* anything!” Without giving Jeskia a chance to respond, Sam was off again, with Daniel at her side. Nicholi and Evelyn smiled warmly at Jeskia as they passed. Jack merely gave the woman a curious glance as he pursued the others.
“ What was all that about?” Daniel wanted to know. “ Who’s the Prince? What did you do?”
Shrugging, Sam started walking along the path that would lead them to the river, their destination. “ I didn’t do anything. The Prince is Prince Taylin and obviously, he’s the King’s son.” She smiled humourlessly. “ He’s also an arrogant bastard who was going to kill Jeskia’s son just because he didn’t like the way he was being looked at. I stood up to him and since then, Jeskia’s been treating me like some kind of hero. It’s pretty embarrassing.”
“ Other than being an arrogant bastard.. There’s something about this Prince guy you don’t like, isn’t there?” Daniel pressed, having seen a flicker of something in Sam’s eyes before she’d been able to control it, something he didn’t like the look of. “ Sam, what is it?”
“ Nothing.” Sam smiled weakly and ploughed on ahead, lifting the skirt of her dress out of the way of some low branches as she carried on.
Daniel lingered, waiting for the other three to catch up with him, a deep frown arranging his features. “ Evelyn? What do you know about Prince Taylin? Did something happen between him and Sam?”
Evelyn looked uncomfortable, her eyes darting to Sam’s back and then to Nicholi’s face. “ I’m not supposed to talk about it.. Samantha does not wish to remember..”
“ Remember what?” Jack demanded sharply, his eyes narrowing suspiciously. “ What happened?”
“ Evie, I think we should tell them,” Nicholi whispered. “ They are the friends she told us about.. Samantha trusts them and so should we.”
“ If we do not follow Samantha soon she will get suspicious,” Evelyn whispered back, darting another nervous look in the direction Sam has gone.
“ Go and distract her,” Daniel suggested eagerly. “ Tell her.. Tell her we wanted to ask Nicholi some questions and the subject bored you so you thought you’d go up ahead and join her.”
Evelyn still looked uncertain, debating whether she should be a party to this deception but the more she thought about it, the more it made sense that Samantha’s friends found out. She knew Samantha was considering staying on Velenthia instead of returning home and although she understood part of the motive for doing that, she couldn’t understand why Sam would leave
herself open to such a big threat like that. Picking up her skirts, she threw Nicholi a look to let him know she wasn’t happy with the idea but went after Sam anyway, hoping that if her friend ever discovered they’d told her secret that she would understand and forgive them for it.
“ So?” Jack pressed once Evelyn was out of earshot. “ What happened? What did this Prince-guy do to her?”
“ By defending Jeskia’s son, Samantha attracted Prince Taylin’s attention. He thought it was amusing that a woman, a mere courtesan would stand up to him, a Prince.” Nicholi spoke quietly in a low, conspiratorial tone, aware of what Sam’s reaction would be should she somehow over-hear them. “ That night, the Prince demanded his father send Samantha to him so he could
punish her for being insolent. The King refused, as you would expect, but Prince Taylin wouldn’t accept that. It is why Samantha was moved into another room away from the others, one that she can secure behind her.”
“ What did he do?” Daniel’s question was barely above a whisper as his stomach churned at the possibilities of what could have happened. “ What did Prince Taylin do to get revenge?”
Nicholi’s eyes grew cold, his fists clenching at his sides. “ Prince Taylin,” he spat the name with obvious abhorrence, “ decided he didn’t need his father’s permission and found his way to Samantha himself. He tried.. He tried to force himself on her, and beat her.” His young features aged before Jack and Daniel’s eyes. “ If Samantha was not as strong as she is he would have killed her. The King was furious when he found out and sent his son away, some say to another city, others say to another planet. For the two weeks it took Sam to recover in the medical facility, the King and Evelyn never left her side.”
“ Did he..?” Jack swallowed, unable to say the words. “ Did he.. succeed in punishing her?”
Averting his gaze, Nicholi stared at the ground for a minute, his fists clenching and unclenching at his sides. Slowly, he brought his head back up to meet their expectant eyes and shook his head. “ No,” he answered finally as they let out the breaths they’d been holding. “ He was interrupted by Karalynn and Evelyn before he could. Samantha was unconscious, there was nothing more she could have done to stop him. If Evie and Karalynn hadn’t shown up when they did..” His voice trailed off as both Daniel and Jack shuddered as realisation sunk in.
“ We better..” Daniel cleared his throat. “ We’d better get going.”
Jack nodded in agreement, and instead of trailing behind, he marched on passed them, picking up the pace dramatically. He hadn’t known. Damn it, why hadn’t she told him about that? This Prince-guy was someone he could protect her from if only she returned home with him! Scanning the area ahead of him, Jack could only just see Evelyn and Sam up ahead and quickened his pace once again. He had a foothold now. He had something to work with, something to use in his battle to tempt her home.
~*~
Jack strides off without even looking back at Nicholi and me to make sure we’re following. I can’t really say it’s unexpected. He’s always been like that. If he finds out something’s happened to Sam when he wasn’t around to help her through it, he *has* to see her again before he can believe she got through it okay. He needs to confirm what his rational mind already knows – that she made it through something else horrible.
“ Colonel O’Neill cares greatly for Samantha.” Nicholi’s voice startles me for a moment, having forgotten that I wasn’t as alone as I felt. I look at him out of the corner of my eye, careful to keep one eye on what’s in front of me. The last thing we need right now is for me to trip over something I didn’t see and break my ankle. “ I do not understand how he can care for her so yet still be the cause of her unhappiness.”
“ Ah..” I suddenly realise Nicholi is waiting for a response, waiting for me to either deny or confirm his observations. “ It’s complicated,” is what I opt for saying.
“ How so?” Nicholi presses blatantly. “ How can the act of love be complicated when it is the simplest form of existence?”
Allowing myself a small grin at his optimism because he reminds me of myself, from quite a few years ago, I give him a curious look in return. “ Who told you that?”
“ My mother,” he answers as his face turns scarlet. He drags his feet on the floor, still awaiting some kind of explanation from me as I try to think of how I can put the military, the Air Force and all of their regulations in terms he will understand.
“ You’re not free to love Evelyn, are you?” I decide to take the easiest approach – comparing Sam and Jack’s situation with one he is more familiar with. Nicholi looks set to argue with me at that but eventually hangs his head and nods. “ It’s a bit like that with Sam and Jack. Only Sam isn’t owned by anyone.. Or at least she wasn’t, before she came here.” I frown at that,
realising my friends have yet another obstacle in their way. “ Anyway, they’re both part of this system. It’s called the Air Force.”
“ Yes!” Nicholi’s outburst takes me by surprise. “ Samantha has told me all about it,” he explains excitedly. “ The Air Force is one of your world’s methods of defence against your enemies. There are different positions you can achieve and there are rules you have to follow.”
Smiling at having it made a little easier for me, I no d. “ There are different ranks you can work up to, yeah. And there are regulations, which is what forbids Sam and Jack from being together, from being free to love each other as you put it. Regulations.. They’re designed.. to make working in the structure of the Air Force easier and simpler. Without regulations, no
one would really know what they can and can’t do and everything would be in complete chaos. Nothing would be achieved and the Air Force, Navy, Marines and Army would be useless in defending our planet.”
“ What does love have to do with it?”
Nicholi’s question makes me laugh, which takes him by surprise. If only he knew he was quoting songs from Earth’s culture without having stepped foot on the planet. Clearing my voice and containing my amusement, I continue on with the explanation he’s still waiting for. “ Fraternization – that’s being in love or being.. involved.. with someone intimately – is frowned upon, especially between officers like Sam and Jack who work together. It’s particularly bad for Sam and Jack because he’s her Commanding Officer. That means he gives her orders and has to sometimes send her into dangerous situations.” Sighing, I kick a stone that lies at my feet with pure frustration at the whole situation. “ The Air Force thinks that if Sam and Jack were to ever.. act.. on how they feel, it would mean they couldn’t do their jobs because Jack wouldn’t be able to send Sam into dangerous places and Sam wouldn’t be able to follow his orders and leave him behind if she ever had to.”
“ Surely the people of your world know that love is the most important gift two people can share?” Nicholi asks incredulously. “ How can a world forbid two people from being happy and experiencing all that love can bring?”
I get the impression his mother is responsible for his idealistic side, Torin somehow doesn’t seem like a hearts and flowers kind of guy, no matter how nice he is. Sighing again, I pat Nicholi on the back comfortingly, knowing my explanation has distressed him. “ It’s stupid, Nicholi. You and I know that, but unfortunately, it isn’t up to us what happens.”
We walk for a little while in silence as I wonder how far ahead the others are, the forest getting denser the further we walk into it. From my side, Nicholi pipes up with a question I’ve been asking myself for a long time. “ Why do Samantha and Colonel O’Neill abide by these rules if they make them unhappy? Surely they realise they deserve something for defending your planet
and risking their lives?”
That’s something I’ve thought about a lot, especially in these recent months, seeing Jack try and deal with Sam disappearing on us in the way she did, leaving no trace and no clue of where she was behind. I watched him go through most of the stages of grief and bereavement; there was guilt and denial, anger and pain and idealising all the memories he had of her.
The last sign never came, and I don’t know if it ever would had we not found her or discovered the worst had happened and she’d died without any of us by her side. Acceptance was something I could never see Jack doing. He would never be able to accept that she was gone for good. Even with some solid proof, I know he’d try to cling on to the hope that it was a mistake and then when the hope faded, he’d just give up. Jack O’Neill doesn’t do acceptance, not about someone he loves.
And he does love Sam, just as Sam loves him. For the first few years of us all being together, I thought they were just blind. Turns out they’re not so blind after all, they’re just scared by it so they try to repress it in the hopes they’ll someday get the chance to be together without having to risk their careers to do it.
Everyday with SG-1 has taught me that someday might never come, but there’s nothing I can do about it but hope Sam and Jack realise that and do something to bring ‘someday’ a lot closer. Before one of them wakes up and realises it’s too late.
~*~
“ Ain't it funny how some feelings you just can't deny
And you can't move on even though you try
Ain't it strange when your feeling things you shouldn't feel
How I wish this could be real.”
~ ‘Ain’t It Funny’, Jennifer Lopez
~*~
~*~
Part Nine
~*~
“ I know that when you look at me
There's so much that you just don't see
But if you would only take the time
I know in my heart you'll find. Oh, a girl who's scared sometimes
Who isn't always strong, can't you see the hurt in me?
I feel so all alone.”
~ ‘Run to You’, Whitney Houston
~*~
Only once Jack had found the clearing by the river and witnessed Sam laughing and joking with Evelyn with his own two eyes did he allow himself to slowly calm down, his breathing and heart rate returning to normal as he tried to look casual as he approached them.
“ Are Nicholi and Daniel still talking guy-talk?” Sam asked conversationally, her smile fading as he came closer.
“ Ah, yeah.” He glanced behind him and realised they weren’t as close behind him as he’d thought. Turning back to her, he gave her what he hoped was a warm grin. “ It was something about the history of this place. Kinda boring.”
“ Oh.” She smiled a little in response as Evelyn spread out a blanket. Silently, she helped Evelyn empty the contents of the basket onto the blanket and sat down next to her, resting her chin on her knees as she curled up into herself. “ Well, we might as well get started. Knowing Daniel, he could keep Nicholi busy all day.”
Obviously agreeing, Evelyn reached for her favourite sandwich as Sam handed Jack another. Their fingers brushed and they smiled shyly at each other as Evelyn watched with a concealed smile of her own. They ate companionably, each apparently consumed by their own thoughts as Daniel and Nicholi finally caught up with them.
Once their meal was done, they toasted Nicholi and Evelyn’s engagement with the fruity drink Jeskia had put in the basket. It was then Sam decided to let Evelyn and Nicholi in on the news they would soon be able to leave Velenthia and be together if they wanted to.
“ Nicholi,” she started with a quick look to Jack, trying to discern if he knew what she was going to say and asking if it was still okay with him. Discreetly, he nodded, giving her the go ahead to break the news to them. “ You know how I told you at the ball that there might be a way for you and Evie to be together without you having to save up to buy her?”
“ I do,” Nicholi nodded solemnly, grasping Evelyn’s hand in his. “ You said you would need a few sun-cycles to think about it but that you might have a way for us to leave Velenthia a lot sooner.”
Smiling, Sam nodded. “ What would you two say to leaving with Colonel O’Neill, Doctor Jackson and their team in a few sun-cycles? It would mean you would definitely have a new place to go to and won’t have to struggle by yourselves to find some where to live or some way to support yourself.”
Nicholi frowned in confusion. “ How can we leave if I am yet to earn enough to free her from the King’s ownership?”
“ That’s where we come in,” Jack supplied, taking over the explaining. “ The King is pretty desperate to become an ally with Earth because of the technology we have to defend ourselves. He’s offered to exchange some medical technology in exchange for defensive technology such as weapons and we think we can get him to include Evelyn in that deal. Then we can take both you and Evelyn back to Earth with us where neither of you will be owned by anyone.”
“ Apart from each other,” Nicholi added, giving Evelyn’s hand a squeeze.
“ Apart from each other,” Daniel echoed, grinning reassuringly. It was the first he’d heard of the plan but he thought it was a good one. There was only one aspect of it that he was unsure of, an aspect that was holding Evelyn’s excitement in check.
“ What about Samantha?” The young woman enquired, giving the woman she saw as both a mother and sister a anxious glance. “ Will she be returning to Earth with us?”
“ No.” Sam shook her head, her tone stern. “ There’s no way the King can let me go, Evie. You know that.”
“ Then I won’t leave you,” Evelyn retorted stubbornly. “ I won’t leave you here alone.”
Shaking her head, Sam reached out to cover Evelyn’s hand, the one that Nicholi wasn’t clinging to, with one of her own. “ Evie, please. I won’t be alone. I’ll have Karalynn, the King, Jeskia and all the others. It’s pretty hard to be alone here, you know that. I want you and Nicholi to go. You can always come back and visit his family or me whenever you want to. I’m sure Colonel O’Neill will make sure the General knows you have an open invitation to return whenever you want.” Jack nodded in confirmation.
Evelyn’s eyes filled with tears. “ I don’t want to leave you,” she murmured. “ Who will I talk to? Who’ll help me with things?”
“ Nicholi, for the most part,” Sam answered, sending a smile at the young man in question. “ But there are other nice people on Earth. I’ve told you about them. Asides from the people you’ve already met, there’s Janet and Cassandra who will make you more than welcome. General Hammond is a nice guy.. You’ll be fine.” She gave Evelyn’s fingers a gentle squeeze. “ Do you
really think I’d send you somewhere if I didn’t know you could be happy there?”
“ No, you wouldn’t.” Evelyn sniffed as a tear tracked down her face. “ But I’m going to miss you. A lot.”
“ I’ll miss you, too,” Sam assured her, looking down so she could blink back tears of her own. “ But you’ll be fine. I know you will.” Evelyn nodded but found she was unable to do anything but hold on tightly to both Nicholi and Sam’s hands.
Clearing his throat to get their attention, Jack’s eyes locked with Sam’s when she looked up. “ So it’s all settled then? I’ll ask the King about it tonight?”
“ Yes.” She nodded and took a deep, soothing breath. “ Thank you.”
“ No problem.” Jack forced a smile and they looked sadly at one another for a few moments. Daniel, sensing they were getting caught up within each other again, started telling Evelyn and Nicholi about Earth and eventually asked the newly engaged couple if they take him on a walk a little further down the river. He said he was interested in learning where it came from and
what system the Velenthians used to filter the water into the city and into their homes. Both Evelyn and Nicholi agreed to the suggestion, and it was only after the three of them had stood up and started walking away that Sam and Jack realised it was a ploy to leave the two of them alone together.
They sat without saying anything for a while, occasionally risking glances at one another, looking away when the other almost caught them. Sam read the concern and worry in his eyes and sighed heavily, beginning to pack the leftovers of their picnic away. “ They told you, didn’t they?” She asked flatly, the question more a resigned statement than one that needed confirming.
“ Were *you* going to tell me?” He didn’t even try to deny it, knowing she would see through him if he did. Instead, he settled for watching her reaction, waiting for her to answer him. She continued packing the basket, leading him to reach out and take hold of her hands so she had no chance of avoiding the question, no distraction to hold her back. “ Sam? Were you going to tell me?”
“ So it’s back to being Sam, is it?” She lifted her eyes to meet his. “ This morning it seemed you didn’t want to know me.”
“ I know, and I’m sorry for that,” he apologised. “ Now answer the question. Were you really going to let me leave without knowing about this Prince?”
“ What does it matter?” She shot back. “ There is nothing you can do about it, whether I told you or not. It’s not your problem, *he’s* not your problem. I can look after myself, Colonel. I don’t need anyone else trying to protect me.”
Swallowing the retort that came to mind about the King already doing that, Jack tightened his hold on her hands, being careful not to hurt her but unwilling to let her pull away. “ It’s back to being Colonel, huh? What happened to Jack?”
“ That’s what I’d like to know,” Sam retorted coolly.
“ This isn’t getting us anywhere.” Jack shook his head, wishing he could bring one of his hands away from hers to massage his temples, the tension between them creating a dull ache in his head. “ Just answer me this. If I leave you here, can you give me any guarantees you’ll be alive and well if we.. *when* we come back to visit you?”
Biting her lip, Sam refused to meet his eyes. “ I can’t make a promise like that. No one can. No one knows what’s around the next corner. I might get struck by lightening or something. Who knows?”
“ If he comes back, do you think he’ll try to hurt you?” Jack kept firing the questions at her, determined to see it from his point of view even if he couldn’t convince her to somehow leave with him. “ Will the King be able to stop him from hurting you?”
“ He’ll probably try to hurt me and the King will try to stop him!” Sam replied angrily. “ I can’t give you definite answers! I don’t exactly *remember* what happened the first time round so how can I guess what might happen the next time?”
“ How come you don’t remember?” He pressed, determined to know all he could about what had happened, determined to come up with a way of preventing it from happening again.
She groaned and closed her eyes tightly, realising he wasn’t going to leave the subject alone. “ I don’t remember because when we were struggling, he knocked me over and I hit my head on something. I passed out. The next thing I knew, I was waking up in the medical bay of the palace with the King and Evelyn looking over me. I don’t *know* what happened or what didn’t
happen. I don’t *want* to know. What little I remember is enough.”
“ So you do get to use the advanced medical technology,” he mused, pondering Captain Gardam’s outburst from earlier that morning, Distracted by his thoughts, he was startled when Sam roughly pulled her hands away from his and started packing away the remaining leftovers zealously. “ We’re not finished talking yet.”
Her eyes snapped to his and he was taken back at the iciness he saw reflected there, iciness meant for him. “ You might not be through talking but I am. I’m through listening, too.”
“ What did I do?” He appeared to be genuinely oblivious and that only served to anger Sam a lot more. “ What did I say?”
“ Well, first of all, there was your behaviour this morning. As though I didn’t exist. Secondly, there’s all of these questions that I *really* don’t want to answer.. And thirdly,” the coldness in her voice gave way to hurt. “ Thirdly, you’re looking at me in the same way I’d expect Captain Gardam or some other small minded idiot to. And I can tell you’re thinking what she was thinking this morning.”
“ And what would that be?” Jack asked, grabbing her arm before she had a chance to pull away, holding her tightly so she couldn’t move away no matter how hard she tried and struggled. “ Tell me what I’m thinking because right now I have no idea what’s going on with you!”
“ You want me to tell you what you’re thinking?” Sam gave him a smile devoid of any of the humour or warmth he normally associated with her smiles and Jack found he had to suppress a shiver. “ Okay. You’re thinking that you don’t understand how I could do what I’ve done, how you don’t believe the Major Carter you *used* to know could sink to these levels. How Gardam was right when she said you don’t know what kinds of diseases I carry.” She glared at him as she stood up on legs that weren’t one hundred percent steady. “ Well not that it’s any of your business, courtesans of Velenthia don’t need to worry about things like that. All of the people they are sent to tend to go through medical screenings to make sure nothing like that happens. The only time I’ve been in the palace hospital, for want of a better word, was when they needed to operate on me to save my life after Taylin nearly killed me.”
He scrambled to his feet as she stared walking away. “ Sam! Carter!! Damn it.” He half-ran, half-jogged after her, eventually getting between her and the path. “ Where do you think you’re going?”
“ Back to the palace,” Sam answered with a sigh. “ You can tell the others I didn’t feel well and I’ll see them later.”
“ Do you?” He continued to block her path, desperately trying to stay in her way and not let her pass.
Staring at him, obviously exasperated, she arched an eyebrow. “ Do I what?”
“ Do you feel unwell?” He persisted, frowning out of concern.
“ I’m getting a headache,” she muttered. “ Other than that, I’m fine. I just don’t want to hang around here any longer and feel like.. feel like I’ve let you down by changing. It isn’t my fault, I didn’t have any choice in this. It was either this or die and I thought you’d agree this was preferable. Guess I was wrong about that, huh?”
“ Of course you weren’t!” Jack stared at her in disbelief. “ Do you honestly think that’s what I think? That what you’ve done is something to be ashamed or embarrassed about? Or disgusted by?”
Sam met his gaze challengingly. “ Don’t you?”
“ No!” He grasped her upper arms firmly, almost shaking her as he answered her, horrified that she could ever think that. “ You did what you had to do to survive in an unusual situation. That’s what we’re taught at the Academy and every day in jobs like these! You did what you were supposed to do! You *lived* and that’s the important thing! How could you ever think I’d feel
differently about you because of what you did to live? Jesus, how could you think any of us would feel like that?”
“ You acted like it,” she told him simply, no longer resisting. “ This morning, when you wouldn’t look at me. You wouldn’t talk to me. You acted as though you were ashamed to have anything to do with me.” She averted her gaze and sighed. “ To be perfectly honest, I wouldn’t have been surprised if you and Daniel and even Teal’c adopted Captain Gardam’s attitude. I fully expect everyone else on Earth to feel the same way as she does if I ever went back.”
“ Is that one of the reasons you won’t come back with us? Asides from the King not being able to let you go or the risk of him losing power if you escaped.. Are you afraid of their reaction? Of what the people back home will think?” Jack frowned down on her, unconsciously drawing a little nearer as she sighed again. “ Sam?”
Slowly, she raised her head to his and he saw the tears shining in her eyes. “ There is always going to be someone who can’t see past what I’ve done here. I don’t know everyone at the SGC, and God knows how many new people have joined since I’ve been here. I can’t trust them not to judge me because of this and yes, that does make me a little bit nervous about the prospect of going home.”
“ No one has to know,” he murmured convincingly, one of his hands rising up to cup her cheek. “ None of us will say anything, General Hammond won’t, Janet won’t.. Captain Gardam can be persuaded not to say anything..”
“ You forget I grew up on one military base after another,” she reminded him somewhat sadly. “ You’re being optimistic. Nothing ever stays secret for long on a military base, and I honestly don’t think you or even Teal’c could convince Captain Gardam not to say anything. She hates me too much. I’m a threat to her, no matter how much she looks down on me. She will tell people when you get back and I can’t handle that. I don’t *want* to have to handle that. I’m not even sure I could.” She sighed again and shook her head, staring down at her feet. “ I’ve changed. I know I’ve changed. I don’t know if I can go back to being Major Carter or Doctor Carter, the one who’s always trying to figure something out. My life here.. It’s so simple in comparison and for the first time since I can remember, I’ve been allowed to just be me without the fear I’ll let someone down or be rejected for it. I like that feeling. I like it here. Other than my new profession and the fact I’m not with you guys anymore, I like the person I’ve become.”
His hand continued to caress her cheek. “ You don’t have to change if you go home. You can still be *this* Sam Carter.. That’s up to you. But please, for all of our sakes, think about coming home with us. It hasn’t been the same without you there..”
“.. And it won’t be the same as it was even if I go back, not if I stay the person I am now,” she added for him, her eyes heart-rending and beseeching. “ Once you leave home for as long as I’ve been away.. You can never go back. And if you do, you’ll only find nothing is as you remembered it to be. It’s better for us all if I stay here so we can keep the memories of what
was instead of ruining them with what now is and thoughts of what could have been.”
“ You know you’re not making any sense to me, don’t you?” He gave her a lop-sided grin that didn’t last very long. “ I’m not giving up, you know. Not until SG-1 has stepped through the Stargate and been welcomed back by Hammond. Until then, I’m gonna keep bugging you about coming back with us. I mean,” he continued, lightening the mood with humour as he usually did when things got uncomfortable or too emotional, “ do you have any idea how much trouble I’ll be in with General Hammond and your father if they find out I let you stay here? General Hammond’s one thing, but Dad.. He’s a force to be reckoned with, Carter. And Selmac’s pretty scary for a worm.”
She couldn’t stop herself from smiling, and she found she didn’t really want to. She felt herself relax completely and let him lead her back to the blanket, sitting down closer to the river than they had before, slipping her shoes off so she could paddle as Jack imitated her and did the same.
In the time it took Daniel, Evelyn and Nick to join them, Sam and Jack covered the ‘business’ side of all that she had missed, discussing the changes that had taken place in the SGC and the developments that had been made and the technologies that had been found. Jack noticed her eyes light up as he described some of the technology she would get to play with if she returned with him, and hid a smile at the thought of tempting her home by mentioning her beloved doohickeys. They stayed away from the subject of life outside the base, partly because Daniel had already filled her in on a lot of things she’d missed and partly because it would make things too personal. He knew she would ask about the things he’d done since she’d been taken and he dreaded having to tell her the only thing he’d done was pour over what little they had on where she could be, night after night after night, carrying on his search long into the early hours of the morning, even when he was confined to his own house on Hammond’s orders. He didn’t want to have to tell her that, nor did he want to see her reaction, almost certain it would be the
opposite of what he wanted it to be.
Once their friends had joined them, they decided to head back to the palace. The air had cooled considerably during their conversation and Sam, Evelyn and Nicholi suspected that there would be another storm erupting in the calm skies that evening.
Just as they made it to the palace gates, having lost Nicholi on the way as he’d had to go home rather than join them in the palace, lightning split the skies and the clouds broke, heavy rain drops failing from the heavens like tears.
“ O’Neill.” They were greeted by Teal’c as the approached the main entrance to the palace, the Jaffa approaching them with his Staff weapon in hand. “ I was on my way to find you. I grew concerned when you did not arrive back in time for our evening meal with the King.”
“ We missed dinner?” Daniel and Jack chorused, looking at each other as rain ran down their faces. “ Guess we must have lost track of the time,” Daniel added with a shrug.
“ I’m sure there’ll be something for you to eat,” Sam spoke up with a smile at the looks on their faces. “ Just ask one of the servants if there are any leftovers. You’ll probably be given a three course meal.”
“ You won’t be joining us?” Daniel looked as disappointed as Jack felt, his eyes searching Sam’s face as she glanced away. “ You guys haven’t eaten either..”
It was Evelyn who answered his question, looking a little too pale. “ Unfortunately, I have plans with someone tonight, Doctor Jackson. Samantha always helps me prepare myself, although I’m sure she will join you and your companions later.”
“ Just remind yourself this will be the last time,” Sam murmured to her, wrapping an arm around her waist as the young woman laid her head on her shoulder. “ You’ll be free from all of this soon.” She looked up and met Jack’s eyes, seeing the silent question there and nodded. “ I’ll join you later if there’s time,” she told Daniel. “ If there isn’t, I’ll see you in the morning over breakfast.”
“ Okay then,” Daniel heaved a long-suffering sigh. “ Well.. I if don’t see you.. Good night and sleep well.”
“ Right back at you,” Sam grinned. “ Now, I think we should all be getting inside before we get too wet. It is raining, you know.”
They started walking quickly towards the doors, with Sam and Evelyn trailing behind them. Sam smiled in the rain as she heard Jack ask Daniel if it was possible for them to be any wetter than they already were, hearing the archaeologist grunt in reply. Once inside, they went their separate ways. Sam looked back over her shoulder at the same time as Jack looked over his and
their eyes met. They held each other’s gazes for as long as they could, trading small smiles before they each walked out of sight.
They walked out of each other’s line of sight, completely unaware that someone else had been watching.
~*~
Up in Sam’s room, Sam and Karalynn were helping Evelyn get ready. Karalynn had scolded both of them for being so irresponsible and letting themselves get soaked, telling them not to go to her if they both got colds because it was their own fault. Sam and Evelyn had stood next to each other in front of the fire as Karalynn had told them off, trading secretive smiles behind the elder woman’s back like school girls caught trading notes in class.
As soon as Karalynn had finished her tirade, she had ushered Sam into changing into some dry clothes, ordering her to sit by the fire so her hair could dry whilst she bathed Evelyn. Evelyn and Karalynn soon returned and Sam helped decide on what the younger woman should wear to her meeting.
“ I think.. Something warm,” Sam murmured, browsing through the dresses Karalynn had already brought up from Evelyn’s room to Sam’s. “ Something.. I don’t know. I’m just not seeing it.”
“ Me neither,” Karalynn agreed, staring critically at the dresses. “ On a night like tonight, it needs to be.. suitable. I’m not sure about the red, either. I don’t think it will be very becoming with Evelyn looking so pale tonight.”
Sam nodded. “ We should stay away from dark colours. They’ll make her look a little withdrawn.” She turned to Evelyn in time to see the young woman stumble and collapse into a chair, hanging her head as she clutched her stomach. “ Evie?” In an instant, she was kneeling on the floor at Evelyn’s feet, Karalynn not too far behind.
“ I don’t feel well,” Evelyn gasped, raising her deathly pale face to the concerned eyes of Sam and Karalynn.
“ What’s wrong, child?” Karalynn asked, placing a hand on Evelyn’s clammy forehead. “ You feel warm to the touch. I told you it wouldn’t do to stay out in the rain for so long. You brought this all on yourself.. I wouldn’t be too surprised if Samantha started feeling the same way..”
“ I feel sick.” Evelyn’s announcement was accompanied by her mad dash to Sam’s private bathroom on shaking legs, and was soon followed by the sounds of violent retching. Karalynn stared after her in shock as Sam raced into the bathroom to hold Evelyn’s hair out of her way, rubbing her back in soothing, circular motions.
“ It’s okay,” Sam murmured softly, sensing Evelyn’s panic begin to rise. “ You’re okay, Honey. You’ll be okay.”
Karalynn appeared in the doorway, her face anxious. “ Is there anything I can do, Samantha? Anything you need doing or fetching?”
Looking up, Sam gave her a grateful smile. “ Could you please let the King know Evelyn can’t honour her plans tonight as she is ill but I will be sending a replacement, and let whoever is available know they’re needed to go to the room Evelyn uses to meet with her lovers and take over for her tonight?”
Karalynn smiled, relieved she could do something to help. “ Consider it done, Samantha. Would you like me to bring you anything?”
“ You could see if there’s any of that herbal tea lying around in the kitchen?” Sam suggested thoughtfully. “ I’m sure I was told it helped calm the stomach and lower temperatures by Corlinetta. I think we’re going to need some of that here tonight.”
“ I will see what I can do.” Karalynn bobbed her head, cast one more sympathetic glance in Evelyn’s direction and all but fled from the room. Sam helped Evelyn sit upright, and handed the young, shaken and obviously scared woman a cloth to wipe her mouth, returning to the main area of her room to pour Evelyn a goblet of water, taking it back into the bathroom as soon as she could.
Kneeling beside Evelyn, she pushed the hair back from her face. “ Evie? You feel up to standing now? We should get you to bed so you can lie down.”
Taking a few small sips from the goblet, Evelyn nodded and, with Sam’s help, got to her feet. Together, the two of them walked slowly through to the bedroom and Sam gingerly helped Evelyn lie down. “ Stay with me?” Evelyn’s voice was barely above a whisper as she gazed at Sam with terrified eyes.
Giving her a reassuring smile, Sam nodded and climbed up on bed beside her, taking the young woman in her arms as Evelyn snuggled closer into her, like a child seeking comfort from a mothers embrace after a bad dream. Closing her eyes, Sam rested her chin on the top of Evelyn’s head and as Evelyn’s breathing slowed to a normal rate, Sam gave in to the temptation of
obliviousness.
~*~
In another part of the palace, there were two people who couldn’t find salvation in slumber. Veronica lay on a bed, staring up at the ceiling as she listened to the man who was in her company pace the room, searing and ranting.
He wasn’t pleased, but neither was she. She didn’t want to be here anymore than he wanted her. It was just as disappointing for her as it was for him. She was used to being treated like a princess, used to having everyone fawn over her and pamper her and wait on her hand and foot. She was used to all of the women of Velenthia being envious of her because she was the courtesan famed for her beauty, she was the one who tempted their husbands back to her, again and again and again.
She wasn’t anymore. Someone else had taken her place and she had to make do with what offers the King would reject for *her*. She was no longer the most desired woman in the city, she was only second best. She had lost the fame she had tried so desperately to keep and she was hurting and angry because of it. She was certain she was the one who had suffered the most
because of *her* arrival, the one who had lost her dignity and reputation.
Lord Jalen, however, didn’t see it that way. He had been hoping for revenge, knowing Evelyn was the easiest way to get to the woman he hated with a passion – Samantha Carter. He had planned to use Evelyn to show her he was not someone she could humiliate easily or wrap around her finger in the way she apparently had the King and all the others at her beck and call.
His plan had failed, however, as instead of Evelyn, he had been sent Veronica. And although she was a beautiful woman, she was not the one he wanted, nor the one he had been planning to use against the one he wanted.
Swearing, he threw his glass goblet at the wall. It shattered with such force it made Veronica jump. Tiny shards of glass went everywhere, showering every available surface, including the floor on which Lord Jalen walked barefoot.
He did not notice the pain as the shards dug into his skin. He didn’t notice the fierce storm gathering outside. His eyes were narrowed, sparkling manically in the light of the moon and streaks of lightening that occasionally split the skies. His mind was already focused on planning the next step, the next scheme of seeking revenge.
And he would get revenge. Revenge against the King for forbidding him from seeing Samantha, revenge against Samantha for being constantly out of reach. Revenge against everyone who had ever done him wrong.
He didn’t care what it would cost him, or how many lives he would have to put at stake. He didn’t care about anything as his mind raced, filling his thoughts with images of the illusive Samantha Carter begging him to save her life.
A sickening grin curled up his lips in a sneer. He wouldn’t be happy until he had her where he wanted her. And he would stop at nothing until he achieved it.
~*~
“ At times I'd like to break you
And drive you to your knees
At times I'd like to break through
And hold you endlessly.”
~ ‘Sometimes When We Touch’, Dan Hill
~*~
~*~
Part Ten
~*~
“ I swear by the moon and the stars in the sky I'll be there.
I swear like the shadow that's by your side I’ll be there.
For better or worse, till death do us part,
I'll love you with every beat of my heart,
And I swear.”
~ ‘I Swear’, All 4 One.
~*~
Early the next morning, Sam awoke to the feeling of being jostled on the bed. She opened her eyes in time to see Evelyn dash through to the bathroom, the sounds of the young woman being sick following shortly afterwards. With a half-sigh, half-yawn, Sam pushed herself up off the bed, stumbling into the bathroom as she rubbed at her eyes.
“ Evie?” She yawned again as she sat down next to Evelyn, and began rubbing her back gently once more. “ Still no better?”
Evelyn wiped her mouth as she sat upright, looking at Sam with tears brimming in her eyes. “ What is wrong with me, Samantha? I felt well when we were on our picnic. Is Karalynn right? Did I catch something from staying out in the rain too long once we returned?”
“ I don’t think that’s the problem,” Sam murmured sincerely. “ If it was being out in the rain, you’d have a cold and I probably would, too. I feel fine and you’ve got none of the common cold symptoms so.. This is something else, Honey. I don’t know what, but we’ll find out.”
“ What can it be?” Evelyn’s eyes were fearful as her fingers searched for Sam’s hand, clinging to it desperately once they found their target. “ I.. I am not.. dying.. am I? I have never before been so sick..”
“ Shh.” Sam pulled her into a warm hug, trying to hide her own concern and alarm from the young woman. “ I’m sure it’s nothing serious like that. On Earth, people get sick and make full recoveries all the time. It’s normal for people to get sick.” She released Evelyn and smiled reassuringly. “ We’ll find out what’s wrong with you soon, Evie, I promise. Corlinetta will be able to help us. We can go and see her later today when you’re feeling stronger.”
To her surprise, Evelyn shook her head in protest. “ I spoke to Nicholi about going to see her and he said she was visiting her family. She will not be come for several moon-cycles.”
Sam groaned inwardly but tried to remain reassuring on the outside. “ Well then I’ll just go to the King and explain the situation. I’m sure he won’t mind if I take you to see one of the other doctors in the palaces medicine centre.”
“ Courtesans are amongst all of those who are forbidden from there,” Evelyn reminded her glumly. “ Even the king cannot change the rules unless it is a matter of life and death as it was for you.”
“ I’ll talk to him,” Sam repeated, making a vow to herself that they would get to the bottom of Evelyn’s illness. “ Until then, I want you to get back to bed. On my way to see the King, I’ll call in on Karalynn and send her up here to keep you company.”
“ Okay.” With Sam’s help, Evelyn made her way back to the bed and snuggled down under the blankets, willing her stomach to calm down. She smiled dozily as Sam leaned down to kiss her forehead. “ I’m glad you are here, Samantha.”
“ I wouldn’t want to be anywhere else,” Sam promised, getting to her feet as she crossed the room to the door. She gave Evelyn one last concerned glance and left, her mind focused on the task ahead. Her first mission was to find Karalynn and ask her to stay with Evelyn until she returned, her second was to somehow convince the King to bend the rules and allow Evelyn
access to the technology only the wealthiest of Velenthians were permitted to use.
Karalynn was only too happy to help, her concern for Evelyn obvious when she heard the younger woman wasn’t feeling any better. Thanking her for her help, Sam squared her shoulders and braced herself for her confrontation with the King. She knew she could usually influence him into doing anything, if she smiled sweetly enough and used the same hopeful eyes she’d used on
her father more than once during her childhood, but Evelyn had been right when she’d said it might not be up to him to decide. The medical facility was largely funded by the upper class Velenthians who used it, giving them a great deal of control over what happened there and who was allowed to receive treatment.
Crossing her fingers behind her back, Sam took a deep, claming breath as she paused outside the dinning room doors, hearing the King’s voice echo into the hall from inside. She *had* to be able to do this. For Evelyn’s sake.
~*~
Knocking once, Sam pushed open the door. SG-1 and the King looked up when they heard her enter. The King, having already been up on his feet, walked over to her and gave her a strained smile, his eyes troubled as his fingers fidgeted agitatedly at his sides.
“ Samantha, I am pleased you could join us.” He took another step closer in her direction. “ How is Evelyn this morning? I was just explaining to our guests why you couldn’t honour your plans to meet with them.”
“ Actually, Evelyn is what I came to talk to you about,” Sam started, feeling nervous at the look in the King’s eyes. Something was wrong, he was too tense. “ Am I interrupting something?”
“ No.” The King was quick to assure her. “ In fact, I am glad you are here. It will save me from having to say this twice.” He hesitated as he ushered her the a chair nearest to Jack’s. “ Perhaps you would like to go first and update us on Evelyn’s condition? I hope it has improved?”
Sam narrowed her eyes, seeing through his concern, knowing he was stalling in making his announcement. Regardless of seeing through him, she did as he suggested, as Evelyn and her health were her first priority. “ I wish I could tell you Evelyn’s condition has improved but I can’t. She’s still pretty sick. That’s why I’m here. Corlinetta won’t be able to help because she’s away for a few da—sun-cycles so..” She took a deep breath, her words coming out in a rush. “ I was wondering if you’d let me take her to the medical facility to find out what’s wrong with her.”
“ Samantha.” The King sighed heavily. “ I cannot give you permission to do that. What if someone saw Evelyn there? The other courtesans would protest.. The facilities supporters would disapprove and demand answers..”
“ And if you don’t, we might miss something seriously wrong with her!” Sam stared at him with blazing eyes. “ You can’t just sit by and let something happen to Evelyn because you’re scared of what some stuck-up, small-mind imbeciles will think of you for caring!”
“ Samantha, you know I..” The King started to explain himself but was cut off by another voice, one that was unfamiliar to SG-1 and unwelcome to Sam.
“ Still as outspoken as ever, I see.” Sam’s head snapped towards the door, her eyes wide as she stared in disbelief at the tall man with cool blue eyes and broad, threatening shoulders. “ I would have thought you’d have disciplined her and taught her better by now, Father.” He smirked as he stepped fully into the room, Sam standing as the King stepped between her and his son. “ You should have taught her some manners. Or perhaps announced my arrival.”
“ I had been about to before you so rudely interrupted,” the King responded sharply. He then remembered SG-1 and turned to them with a smile that grew even more forced as he caught sight of the dark expressions on Jack and Daniel’s faces, realising they had already learned of Sam’s history with his son. “ Taylin, these are our guests from Earth. Our new allies. Colonel, Doctor, Captain, Teal’c.. This is my son, Prince Taylin.”
Prince Taylin gave them a smile oozing with mock-sincerity as Jack clenched his jaw. “ Charmed to meet you, I’m sure.” His gaze paused briefly on each of their faces before coming back to rest on Sam, a grin that made her skin crawl in place on his lips. “ Don’t I deserve some sort of welcome home at the very least?”
“ Not from me.” Sam muttered under her breath. “ I’m going back to be with Evelyn.” She walked passed the Prince, careful to keep some distance between them, and left, closing the door a little harder than necessary behind her.
“ I see she isn’t over-joyed to see me.” Prince Taylin broke the silence that had settled over them at her departure, grinning lazily as he helped himself to a chair and reached for some food. “ Women like her need to be shown who has the power, Father. I told you that.”
The King advanced on his son, his eyes narrow slits. “ If I hear you’ve gone anywhere near her without her permission, I will have you banished from the palace for good.” He stared unflinchingly down on his son, the hand that was grasping the back of the chair turning white with the exertion.
Laughing, Prince Taylin took a bite from a piece of fruit, answering before his mouth was empty. “ You’ve gone soft, Father. But while you are in power of Velenthia, I will abide by your rules. For now.”
Under the table, Jack clenched his fist so hard his short fingernails dug into the flesh of his palm, drawing blood. He didn’t like the way Prince Taylin had looked at Sam nor did he like the way he talked about her. After learning what had occurred between them before, Jack decided he would be staying on Velenthia until the Prince left or he managed to convince Sam to leave, whichever came first. He didn’t care how much trouble he would be in with General Hammond and the Air Force, he could live with it. What he couldn’t live with was the knowledge he’d left Sam alone with a dangerous man like Taylin.
~*~
Sam paced the floor of her room as Evelyn looked at her from her position on the bed. She cursed under her breath, obviously agitated, fear and anger building up inside her in equal measures.
“ I feel well now, Samantha,” Evelyn spoke up, sitting up as she smiled reassuringly at Sam. “ Please, let me know what is troubling you. It’s more than the King denying us access to the facility, isn’t it?”
Sighing, her shoulders slumping, Sam closed her eyes and forced herself to take several deep, calming breaths, exhaling slowly. “ Prince Taylin has returned to Velenthia. He turned up when I was telling the King about you.” She sighed again and sat down on the bed, shaking, telling herself she was just cold. It had been a long time since Samantha Carter had shaken physically with fear and she wasn’t about to admit she was doing it now. “ I thought I.. I thought it wouldn’t affect me if he came back. I told myself I could deal with it but I don’t think I can. Seeing him again..” She broke off and shuddered, wrapping her arms around herself tightly.
“ Then you must come away with us,” Evelyn murmured, her eyes shining. “ We will find a way, Samantha. You will be safe on Earth, back in the home you told me so much about. With the people you’ve told me so much about. You *have* to leave. I will not leave you here with Prince Taylin, and I doubt very much so that Colonel O’Neill and Doctor Jackson will, either.”
“ There’s nothing that they can do, Evie.” Shaking her head, Sam tensed her shoulders and willed her mind to take control of her shaking body. “ There’s nothing anyone can do without risking the King, and I won’t do that to him. Not after all he’s done. Prince Taylin returning doesn’t affect the plan at all. You and Nicholi will leave with SG-1 in a few days time. It’s as simple as that.”
“ No, it isn’t.” Jack’s voice made them both jump as they turned to see him and Daniel in the doorway of Sam’s room. “ Sorry,” he apologised offhandedly for startling them. “ Door was open so we thought we’d just come in.” He shut the door behind Daniel, trading a stern look with the younger man before turning back to Sam, both men wearing resolute expressions. “ We’ve been talking about it and we’ve decided we’re not leaving you here.”
Standing, Sam started to argue. “ We’ve talked about – ”
“ Yeah, yeah, yeah.” Daniel dismissed her with the wave of his hand. “ Jack explained all the reasons for you not coming with us. We’re gonna need some more time to figure a way to get you to the ’Gate with us and then we had another idea, one that might help Evelyn.”
“ Oh?” Sam was curious as she sat back down again, taking Evelyn’s hand in hers to offer the young woman her silent support. “ Help Evelyn how?”
“ Teal’c and Gardam are going back through the Stargate to Earth today.” Jack took over the explaining, helping himself to the chair at the dressing table as Daniel sat down next to the fire. “ They’re going to debrief General Hammond and tell him we’re gonna need a few more days to get you out of here. Gardam probably won’t want to come back so.. Teal’c's going to bring
Doc. Fraiser with him. Then she can look over Evelyn and tell you what’s wrong.”
Blinking, Sam felt the first glimmer of hope of the day start to grow inside her. “ You really think General Hammond will let Janet come through? Or let you guys stay longer than you were meant to?”
“ Oh, yeah,” Daniel grinned confidently. “ You know how Janet’s always itching to get away from the base.. She’ll find someone to look after Cassie with no problems. And the General will no doubt give us as much time as we need to bring you home with us.”
“ Well.. Okay. If you’re sure..?” Sam squeezed Evelyn’s hand. “ Where are Teal’c and Captain Gardam now?”
Jack grinned but seemed, to Sam’s eyes, a little nervous. “ They’re outside by the palace gates. They’re just waiting for one small thing..”
“ And that would be..?” Sam glanced between them warily, arching an eyebrow at the syringe Daniel pulled out of his pocket. “ What’s that for?”
“ It’ll be easier for Janet to know how to treat Evelyn if she knows what’s wrong with her. This is so Teal’c can take a sample of Evelyn’s blood home so Janet can see if there’s any hint as to what Evelyn’s illness is.” Daniel answered. He looked into Evelyn’s frightened eyes and gave her a reassuring smile. “ It doesn’t hurt. We’ve all had it done loads of times.”
“ Samantha?” Evelyn gripped Sam’s hand tightly, shrinking beneath the blankets. “ I feel much better now,” she pleaded.
Taking the syringe from Daniel, Sam turned to face Evelyn with a soft smile. “ Do you honestly feel better or are you just saying that so I don’t worry and don’t take some of your blood?” Evelyn lowered her gaze guiltily. “ Don’t worry, Evelyn. Daniel’s right. We’ve all had this done before and we’re all okay.”
“ What do I have to do?” Evelyn stared suspiciously at the syringe as Sam took off the plastic cover, the needle glinting.
“ Hold out your arm and look in the opposite direction to me.” Sam told her softly. Evelyn did as she was told. Sam took a deep breath and looked carefully for a vein in Evelyn’s arm. Finding one, she poised the end of the needle a millimetre above Evelyn’s skin. “ Okay. Now this might hurt for a second but I promise you, it’ll all be over before you know it. Ready?”
“ Ready.” Evelyn grasped the blankets in her fists and squeezed her eyes tightly shut, holding her breath. Sam fought the urge to do the same and forced herself to keep her eyes open as she jabbed the needle into Evelyn’s skin and prayed she’d find the right place. Relief filled her as the syringe started filling with blood and she let out the breath she hadn’t realised she’d been holding. Moments later, she withdrew the needle and put its plastic cap back on, handing it quickly to Jack as Daniel pressed a small patch of material against Evelyn’s arm. “ Is it over yet?” Evelyn murmured, her eyes still closed.
“ It’s all over,” Sam assured her. Evelyn opened her eyes and blinked, a little confused that it was over so soon. “ It didn’t hurt, did it?”
Shaking her head, Evelyn smiled. “ No, it didn’t.” She looked at the material on her arm, frowning slightly at the small dot of blood that had soaked through. “ Is that normal? For it to be bleeding?”
“ It usually happens,” Daniel was quick to jump in reassuringly. He grinned sheepishly. “ You’re braver than I am. First time someone took blood from me, I passed out.” Evelyn giggled and leaned back against Sam.
“ Well, we should be going. The sooner Teal’c and Gardam have this, the sooner they can leave.” Jack got to his feet and couldn’t help a small grin at the sight of Evelyn falling asleep in Sam’s arms. “ Oh, and I put forward the idea of Evelyn coming with us to the King this morning. He said he’d let me know later today.”
“ Thanks.” Sam smiled at him as Evelyn shifted from leaning on Sam to leaning against the pillows. “ Have you guys made plans for the day or are you just going to be sitting by the ’Gate, waiting for Janet and Teal’c to show up?”
“ We were gonna do that but then Teal’c suggested they take some of Evelyn’s blood back. It’ll be tomorrow at the earliest that Doc. Fraiser has the results so we figured we’d walk Teal’c and Gardam back to the ’Gate and do some exploring of our own,” Jack replied, unable to take his eyes from hers, both of them oblivious to Daniel’s knowing smirk. “ We were going to
ask you to join us but..” He gestured at Evelyn with his hand. “ You’ve got your hands full.”
Nodding, Sam broke eye contact to glance at Evelyn, smiling fondly as the young woman slept on. “ You guys should go exploring,” she agreed, her gaze straying back to his. “ Velenthia is a beautiful place, especially once you get a little further away from the city. I’m sure you’ll both enjoy it.”
“ What about you?” Daniel questioned, his smirk giving way to concern. “ With Prince Taylin being here.. I don’t know if we should go exploring or not.”
“ He won’t try anything,” Sam told him with a look she hoped was more confident than she felt. “ Not with you guys here, and with the King keeping a close eye on him.. If he does try anything, it’ll be less obvious and hopefully there’ll be some warning before he makes his move.”
“ Are you sure?” Daniel pressed, both convinced and unconvinced by her answer. He wanted to believe it, he just wasn’t sure if he should. “ We don’t want to leave if there’s a chance..”
“ Go,” she responded firmly. “ I’ll be fine. He won’t come near me as long as Evelyn’s here and I know Karalynn will be back any minute now so.. I’ll be fine. He won’t try anything, I promise.”
“ Okay.” Daniel still seemed unconvinced but followed Jack to the door regardless of it. “ We’ll be back in.. About..” He looked to Jack, unsure.
Rolling his eyes, Jack opened the door. “ We’ll be back before it gets dark. Hopefully in time to eat.”
“ I’ll see you then,” Sam smiled. “ Have fun,” she called out after them.
Grinning, Jack winked as he closed the door behind them. “ Yasureyoubetcha!”
Laughing in spite of herself, Sam got up from the bed, careful not to wake Evelyn and sat down at her dressing table. She opened the top drawer and took out her journal, flicking through the pages until she found a new, clean page and picked up her pen. Smiling to herself, she began to write, listing the developments that had kept her writing in it for the last few days, needing
something to distract her from the butterflies in her stomach that fluttered around as she thought of seeing Janet again.
~*~
“ Unauthorized Off-World Activation!” The Klaxons blared and the red lights flashed. Janet exchanged a hopeful glance with General Hammond as they held their breaths, waiting for an IDC to be received and recognised by the computer.
“ We’re receiving a transmission code, General. It’s SG-1, Sir!” The technician who was currently sitting in the control room announced. He kept his eyes glued to the monitor, knowing a lot of people’s hopes were riding on this, feeling nervous with so many people’s eyes resting on his back.
“ Open the Iris, Son,” General Hammond ordered in a voice he could barely control. Behind his back, he crossed his fingers, praying this was it.
“ The computer is picking up two travellers, Sir.” The technician spoke up, shifting uncomfortably.
All eyes were averted to the Stargate as the Event Horizon emitted its eerie blue glow. Both General Hammond and Janet moved down to the Gateroom, concerned there were only two people returning when they’d been hoping for five. They reached the bottom of the ramp just as Teal’c and Captain Gardam stepped through.
“ Teal’c, Captain.” The General greeted them both with a sharp nod as the wormhole behind them disintegrated. “ Where are Colonel O’Neill and Doctor Jackson?”
“ They’re back on the planet, Sir,” Captain Gardam stated, her expression sour.
Turning to Teal’c, the General hoped to get more answers from him. “ Teal’c? Why didn’t they return with you? And what’s that in your hand?”
Teal’c handed the syringe to Janet. “ It is a blood sample of a young girl Colonel O’Neill wishes for Doctor Fraiser to go and see. O’Neill and Daniel-Jackson chose to remain on Velenthia until I could return with Doctor Fraiser tomorrow.” He paused and it seemed to Janet that he was fighting a smile. “ They chose to remain behind with Major Carter, hoping that they will come up with a way of bringing her back with us.”
“ Major Carter?” General Hammond’s jaw dropped as Janet covered her mouth with her hand to smuggle a gasp. “ You found her? She was there?”
“ Yes, Sir.” Captain Gardam scowled. “ General, I’d like to request a reassignment from SG-1. I don’t think I’ll be needed there anymore if Colonel O’Neill succeeds in bringing Major Carter home.”
The General nodded, his mind preoccupied. “ We’ll discuss it at the debriefing, in thirty minutes. In the meantime, get yourselves to the infirmary with Doctor Fraiser to be checked out.”
“ Yes, Sir.” Gardam saluted and marched out of the Gateroom, glaring at anyone who crossed her path. Teal’c bowed his head and followed, falling into step with Janet, who was eager to ask him all about Sam, excited at the prospect of travelling through the Stargate and seeing her friend again.
General Hammond remained in the Gateroom, staring at the inactive ’Gate, his thoughts racing as he tried to take in what Teal’c had said. They’d found her. He couldn’t believe it. It seemed too good to be true. His brow furrowed as he remembered what Teal’c had said about SG-1 having to come up with a way to allow Major Carter to travel home with them. Was she hurt, injured? Why couldn’t she just leave?
With those thoughts in mind, he left the Gateroom and headed to the briefing room, staring at the clock, counting down the thirty minutes till he got the answers he needed to the questions that played heavily on his mind.
~*~
Sam barely slept that night, just as Janet, light years away, had the same problem. Both women were nervous and excited, trying to imagine the reunion they’d both been dreaming of for months. It wouldn’t be happening under the circumstances they’d dreamt of, nor in the same place but it was still the reunion they wanted.
Eventually, the night gave way to day and sunlight streamed through the windows in Sam’s bedroom. She stretched cautiously, trying not to wake Evelyn, and climbed out of bed, walking towards the window as she yawned, trying to wake herself up.
With a smile, she moved away from the window, moving to the bathroom. Getting on her knees, she lit the coals beneath the bath and stood, starting to fill it with water. Stretching again, she wandered back into her bedroom, quietly taking a loose and simple dress from the wardrobe as well as some clean underwear from a drawer and took the clothes back into the bathroom. She started to take of her nightgown, only to second-guess whether the door to her room was locked and had to go back out of the bathroom to check. The last thing she wanted was someone – namely Prince Taylin – paying her a surprise visit when Evelyn was asleep and she was in the process of bathing.
Reassuring herself the door was secure, Sam went back to her bath, pouring in a generous amount of scented oils as the water continued to run. She clipped her hair up, turned off the makeshift tap and undressed, immersing herself in the warm water as soon as she could.
Closing her eyes, she rested her head against the back of the bathtub, telling herself she’d just lie there for a while, resting her eyes until she was completely relaxed. She didn’t count on her sleepless night catching up with her, nor did she anticipate the warmth of the water being so comforting that it lulled her to sleep.
“ Samantha?” Almost an hour later, she was awoken by Evelyn, who was kneeling again, having emptied the contents of her stomach. “ Samantha, wake up.”
“ Hmm?” Her eyelids fluttered as she woke up and became able to open them fully. She frowned on seeing Evelyn and sat up. “ Evie? You’ve been sick again?”
“Yes,” Evelyn nodded. “ But Samantha, you’ve missed breakfast.” The young woman stood and handed Sam a towel. “ Colonel O’Neill and Doctor Jackson are waiting for you in the hallway. They have heard from Teal’c. He will be returning shortly.”
Hurriedly, Sam got out of the bath, wrapping herself in the towel, suddenly wide-awake. As Evelyn left her alone to let Daniel and Jack into Sam’s room, she quickly dried herself and got dressed, appearing a few minutes later in the bedroom, her face flushed as she searched for a hairbrush and some shoes. “ Sorry,” she apologised to Jack and Daniel as she slipped her feet
into her shoes at the same time as running a brush through her hair. “ Guess I over-slept.”
“ It’s okay,” Jack grinned, his amusement evident. As far as he could remember, this was the first time he’d seen her late for anything, the first time she’d been flustered and something other than the Little Miss Organised everyone assumed her to be. He liked seeing this side of her, it made her a little more human and less like some machine. “ The SGC radioed us. Teal’c and Doc. Fraiser will be here within the hour.”
Feeling her nerves come back to her, Sam took a deep breath and squared her shoulders. “ Okay. So. I’m ready.”
“ You sure?” Daniel teased, grinning widely. “ You look like you’re going face-to-face with a battalion of Jaffa.”
“ I feel like I am,” Sam muttered, straightening her dress. She glanced down at herself and raised her head, a wary expression on her face. “ Do I look okay?”
Laughing, Daniel walked over to her and gave her a quick hug. “ You look fine. Now quit being so nervous, Janet’s not *that* scary.”
“ She is if she’s got her needles with her,” Jack quipped immediately, winking at Evelyn, who giggled despite not getting the joke. “ He’s right, Carter. Relax. Doc’s probably just as nervous about this as you are.”
“ Okay, okay.” Sam took a deep breath. “ I’m calm. I’m ready. Okay. We should probably go now before I decide this is more than I can handle.” Agreeing, Daniel and Jack ushered her from the room before she could change her mind. Evelyn grinned at them, giggling when Jack rolled his eyes as Sam fussed over her dress. “ We’ll be back soon,” Sam promised Evelyn as she was ‘escorted’ down the hallway. “ And Karalynn’s just downstairs if you need her. Oh, and lock the door if you want to go to sleep.”
“ She’ll be fine, *Mom*,” Jack shook his head, putting a hand to the small of her back as they turned the corner. “ Quit worrying so much. It doesn’t suit you.”
Sam’s only response was to send him a glare as Daniel snickered. During the short trip to the Stargate, it felt like nothing had changed. They teased each and made jokes at each other’s expense, momentarily giving into denial, make believing that everything was the way it once was.
~*~
They got to the Stargate early. Sam started pacing as Jack and Daniel sat down, prepared to wait. She kept asking what time it was, having lost her own watch a long time ago, and kept alternating between chewing on her bottom lip or biting her fingernails.
Finally, the Stargate began to move and they walked to a safe distance. Sam watched the Gate with baited breath as her former team mates watched her, grinning at each other over her anxiety. Sam’s eyes were glued to the Stargate as it activated. She didn’t wince as the wormhole engaged. She forgot to remind herself to breathe.
“ Sam,” Daniel whispered as two figures emerged through the Event Horizon. “ Don’t forget to breathe!” Sam glared at him but took his advice and inhaled deeply, exhaling as Janet and Teal’c approached.
“ Major Carter.” Teal’c greeted her with a nod. Discreetly, he moved over to Daniel and Jack and ushered the two men to the side, having seen how nervous Janet had been on the other side, knowing only half of that nervousness was caused by the thought of going through the Stargate.
Standing in front of each other, Janet and Sam smiled shyly, each taking the time to memorize the appearance of her friend. “ This is stupid,” Sam was the first to break the silence with a sheepish smile. “ It’s not like we’re strangers..”
Janet shook her head but couldn’t speak, her throat clogged and her eyes shining brightly. “ Oh, come here.” She got tired of standing with her arms hanging awkwardly at her side and made the first move. They embraced warmly, clinging to each other stubbornly as they both fought tears. “ I’ve missed you so much!”
“ I’ve missed you, too.” Sam murmured back, holding on for all she was worth. They eventually pulled away as Jack none-too-discreetly cleared his throat behind them.
“ Hate to interrupt, but you did tell Evelyn you wouldn’t be long, Carter,” Jack reminded her with a meaningful look.
Thinking immediately of Prince Taylin, Sam nodded and the five of them made started to make their way back to the palace, Sam and Janet slowly walking behind the men. “ You look great,” Janet murmured, taking in Sam’s new appearance and noting how well it suited her. “ Wonderful, even.”
“ Thank you, you’re just the way I remembered,” Sam grinned and shifted the straps of the backpack she’d taken off Janet, knowing she was probably still more accustomed to the weight of it than her friend was. “ The guys tell me Cassandra’s still doing well at school? And that she’s started dating?”
“ Don’t get me started on Cassie dating,” Janet warned, feigning a shudder. “ It’s been one boy after the last – she can’t decide what her ‘type’ is so said she had to test them all. It’s been a *complete* nightmare.”
“ Must be one heck of an adventure for Cassie, though,” Sam managed to stop herself from giggling. Her expression grew sombre. “ I’ve missed her. I think maybe she’s why I’ve become so close to Evelyn. In a lot of ways, they remind me of each other.”
“ Evelyn?” Janet repeated. “ That’s the woman whose blood you sent through the Stargate?”
“ Yes,” Sam nodded. “ Well, she more like a girl than a woman. In age, anyway. She’s a more mature than someone her age should be. Been through too much for a seventeen year old.”
Janet looked uncomfortable. “ Well she’s about to go through something else a seventeen year old shouldn’t go through.”
Stopping just outside the palace doors, Sam turned to face her, her eyes fearful and concerned. “ What’s wrong with her? What did the blood tests show?”
“ Sam.” Janet put a comforting hand on her arm. “ The blood tests tested negative for a lot of things. But it tested positive for one. Evelyn is pregnant.”
“ Pregnant? Evie?” Sam shook her head, not wanting to believe it. “ But that’s impossible. There are contraceptive measures everyone who’s with a courtesan must use. Evelyn can’t be pregnant unless.. Unless..”
“ Unless what, Sam?”
Sam closed her eyes and released a heavy sigh. “ Unless Nicholi is the father.” She opened her eyes to see Janet’s confusion. “ Nicholi is Evelyn’s fiancé. He’s the only person I know she would be with freely.” She took a deep breath and shook her head, shaking away the distracting thoughts she was having. “ I.. I’ve got to go see the King. I’ll see you guys later, okay?”
Janet and the rest of SG-1 could only nod as she raced off inside the palace, a force to be reckoned with. Jack and Daniel traded confused glances and looked to Janet for answers. The petite doctor only sighed in response.
~*~
Without knocking on the door, Sam pushed her way into the King’s study, her face flushed a deep pink colour, out of breath. Alarmed at her sudden arrival and at her appearance, the King stood, his grave expression turning into one of apprehension.
“ Samantha? My dear, are you well?” He stepped closer, holding out his hand. “ Is it Evelyn? She is better, is she not?”
“ You need to let her go to Earth with SG-1,” Sam managed to gasp. “ It’s important. You have to include her in your trade agreement. I promise you, I’ll stay for as long as I need to, just let Evelyn go.”
The King hung his head and sat back down in his chair, refusing to meet her gaze with his own. “ I’m afraid I cannot allow that, Samantha. Evelyn cannot be included in the trade agreement, as much as I like Colonel O’Neill and his companions.”
“ Why not?” Sam demanded, both devastated and surprised at his response. She had been certain he would let Evelyn go. She knew he was fond of her and she knew it wouldn’t be such a loss if he did. Although Evelyn was beautiful, she was very young and most of the men from the city were nervous about spending the night with someone younger than most of their children. “
You can let her go! She doesn’t bring in that much money! Hell, I’d even take all of her clients from her if you needed me to, no matter how much I’d hate doing it! You *have* to let her go!”
“ I do not think you heard my father properly,” Prince Taylin cut in smoothly, making his presence known as he stood up from his place at sitting in the chair facing the fire. “ He cannot let Evelyn go.” His eyes gleamed evilly. “ Because Evelyn now belongs to me.”
Sam stared, open-mouthed as all of her dreams and plans for Evelyn and Nicholi died in that instant.
~*~
“ Just let me ask of you one small thing
As we have shared so many tears
With fervour our dreams we planned a whole life long
Now are scattered on the wind.”
~ ‘Path of Thorns (Terms)’, Sarah McLachlan.
~*~
~*~
Part Eleven
~*~
“All my thoughts seem to settle on the breeze
When I'm lying wrapped up in your arms
The whole world just fades away
The only thing I hear
Is the beating of your heart.”
~ ‘Breathe’, Faith Hill.
~*~
“ It isn’t fair,” Sam complained for the twelfth time in as many minutes. The day was finally reaching its end. It was dark and cold outside, which made her all the more grateful that she was cocooned in the warmth of Jack’s arms.
After her encounter with the King and Prince Taylin, Sam had gone straight to her friends and former team mates to update them on the latest revelations. From there, she had taken Janet to meet Evelyn and the two women had broken the news to both the confused girl and her fiancé that they were going to be parents. Both Nicholi and Evelyn had been shocked, although it seemed that they were both excited at the news, which was why Sam had chosen not to tell them of the change in their plans. She was going to find a solution, a way to get Evelyn away from here. She *had* to. She felt responsible for her now.
Sam had spent the majority of the day with Janet and Evelyn, listening as Janet told Evelyn everything she needed to know about being pregnant. Throughout it all, Evelyn paid attention, occasionally clutching onto Sam’s hand when something sounded frightening. Janet and Sam later left Evelyn and Nicholi alone in Sam’s room, the two women choosing to wander around the
gardens, talking about anything and nothing, just enjoying the time they were able to spend together.
As the day wore on, they joined their friends for their evening meal. The King and Prince Taylin were thankfully absent. They sat by the fire in the dining room talking for another two hours before Daniel decided to call it a night, with Janet and Teal’c soon agreeing to do the same. Sam had walked with Janet to her room, spending a good half an hour saying goodnight and then when she’d just about to start for her room since Evelyn had gone back to her room with Nicholi, Jack had appeared out of no where. He’d asked her if she wanted to talk, and that was how she’d ended up in his room, curled up against him as he tried to comfort her.
“ We’ll find a way of getting Evelyn back to Earth,” Jack assured her, rubbing her back with his hand in the same way she’d comforted Evelyn earlier. “ I promise, we won’t leave her here.”
“ But how are we going to get her away from Taylin? He *owns* her now and he isn’t going to just let her go. It won’t be that simple,” Sam argued, sighing deeply. “ I can’t believe the King would hand Evelyn over like that. He *knew* you were going to take her to Earth where she’d be safe. I don’t understand it. I don’t get why Taylin would *want* Evelyn in the first place. He’s never shown any interest in her before.”
“ Maybe it’s a way to get at you,” he suggested softly. “ He seems to be holding a grudge against you and it’s obvious how close you and Evelyn are.. Maybe this is his discreet way of getting to you.”
She considered his words and sighed again. “ It sounds like something he would do.” Her eyes narrowed suspiciously. “ This can’t be it, though. He has to have some kind of ulterior motive.. I wonder what he’s going to do, why he’s using Evelyn.”
“ No doubt we’ll find out soon enough so why don’t you quit worrying about it?” Jack shifted so he could see her face, smiling when he saw she was struggling to keep her eyes open. “ You barely slept last night from what I saw this morning, although why you were nervous about seeing Doc, I’ll never know..”
Gazing up at him through deceptively innocent big blue eyes, she blinked sleepily. “ I didn’t know how she was going to react,” she mumbled. “ By now, Captain Gardam has had time to tell everyone on base what it is I do here. Janet knew before she even stepped through the Stargate. I wasn’t sure how she was going to take it, or how she was going to react to me knowing that I.. Knowing what I’ve done.”
“ Anyone who really cares for you won’t let something like this change how they feel,” he assured her, softly cupping her face. “ I honestly can’t see that many people on base reacting in the way you’re expecting them to, especially not anyone who’s spent any time with you before or after the mission to P6Y331. Anyone who really cares will get to know you all over again before making any narrow-minded judgments and they’ll see how special you are.”
Smiling gratefully, Sam caught his hand and entwined her fingers with his. “ Thank you. That means a lot, coming from you.”
“ Hey, you know me. Always coming up with pearls of wisdom, sometimes finding one that makes sense.” He grinned, trying to lighten the mood before it became too serious and emotion-laden. “ Now, how about we try and get some beauty sleep, okay?”
“ Are you saying I need it?” She asked with a yawn as he reached over and turned off the oil lamp, both of them burrowing under the blankets with Jack casually slinging an arm about her waist.
“ Well,” Jack’s tone was teasing, his breath warm on the back of her neck. “ I wasn’t going to say anything but..”
She nudged him with her elbow and he chuckled in response, making her giggle. “ I think you should watch it, Mister.”
“ That’s *Colonel* to you.” He retorted, clinching his hands together at her waist as she leaned back against him.
Her response was lost in a yawn. Within only a matter of minutes, Jack felt her relax completely as her breathing became deep and even. He held onto her, fighting the urge to follow her lead and give into unconsciousness, wanting to prolong the feeling of having her there with him. He knew it wouldn’t be forever, that falling asleep with her in his arms was a luxury he couldn’t get used to. Once they were back on Earth – and he was sure *they* would be – they wouldn’t be able to do this, they wouldn’t be able to share this closeness. Wanting to make it last as long as possible, Jack nestled his chin against the crown of her head and closed his eyes, willing sleep to stay away for a few more hours.
~*~
Waking slowly, Sam smiled at feeling the warmth of another person surrounding her. She glanced at the windows, the position of the sun her only method of telling the time, her smile fading as she remembered why she’d gone with Jack into his room: to talk about Evelyn and the new obstacles thrown into their way by Prince Taylin.
Sighing, Sam started to slip from beneath the blankets, freezing when she felt Jack move behind her as he tightened his grip and mumbled something incoherent. Smiling to herself, she tried to untangle his arms from around her waist. As with every morning, Sam wanted to be up and out before he woke up. She had the feeling being around him first thing in the morning would be
awkward, fearing that some part of him would still see her as ‘Major Carter’ and that first thing in the morning, when he was still half asleep, he’d forget that there was more to her than that.
Somehow managing to replace her body with a pillow, Sam quickly found her shoes and slipped out of the room. She quietly made her way to her room, hoping she wouldn’t bump into anyone, relieved when she didn’t. She changed quickly and tidied herself, an idea forming in her mind. Jack had said he suspected Prince Taylin’s actions had something to do with her, and him
getting even with her. If that was true, then maybe there was a small chance she could convince him to let Evelyn go.
The problem was, what would Prince Tayiln want in return and would she be willing to pay the price of Evelyn’s freedom?
Praying she was doing the right thing and that she would be able to do whatever necessary, Sam made her way from her room to the wing of the palace she knew Prince Taylin would be in.
~*~
He sat in his chair by the fire in his own private study, sipping wine despite the early hour. Prince Taylin was happy, content. Everything was going the way he wanted it to. He had control, he had power. It was a feeling he’d been addicted to since he was a child and first realised who his parents were and what that meant for him. One day, he would rule all of Velenthia, with a firmer hand than his father, and he would relish it. He would enjoy the control it gave him, he would use the power to do as he wanted, not what his advisors suggested.
The knock on the door came as no surprise. With a lazy grin, Prince Taylin set the goblet he was drinking from down on the table at his side. He stood, taking his own sweet time, and walked over to the door, sauntering casually, knowing who would be waiting for him on the other side.
Swinging the door open, he grinned widely, his grin oozing charm. “ Samantha. What a pleasant surprise!” He opened the door to allow her to enter. “ Please, do come in.”
Somewhat reluctantly, Sam stepped into the large room, her fingers twitching at her sides. She stood by one of the chairs in the room, her legs feeling weak but unwilling to sit down and give him any more of an advantage over her. “ This isn’t a social visit,” she started, watching warily as he moved to his chair to retake his original position, picking up his goblet again.
“ I know,” the Prince grinned smugly. “ I was expecting you to visit me.” He arched an eyebrow and gave her a speculative look over the brim of his goblet. “ However, I must say I was surprised you did not choose to visit me last night. I understand you instead spent your night *willingly* with Colonel O’Neill?”
Sam bristled. “ What I do and who I do it with is none of your business.” She took a moment to take a deep breath and calm herself down. Anger was not going to be helpful in this situation. She had to try and stay on his good side, as hard as that was going to be. “ I’m here to discuss Evelyn, and ask you to reconsider.”
“ Reconsider?” The Prince echoed with a hollow laugh. “ What is there to reconsider? Evelyn is a sweet girl, rumoured to have been taught all she knows by you. I’m sure she will keep me very, very happy when I need her to.”
“ But she’s just a child!” Sam exclaimed, trying to appeal to his sensitive side, not expecting to find one. “ She doesn’t deserve to spend the rest of her life confined to this place. She deserves much, much better. Please,” she implored. “ Let Evelyn go back to Earth with SG-1. She can be so much more there than she is here, please give her the chance.”
“ Why?” He put his goblet down and stared into her eyes, curiosity mingled with another emotion she couldn’t decipher but didn’t like shining in his eyes. “ Tell me, Samantha. What would *I* gain by letting Evelyn go? She cost me much, my father refused to give her to me as a gift but was unable to deny by request at purchasing her. Give me one good reason why I should let Evelyn go and tell me what I would gain in return.. and I may consider your request.”
Biting back a sigh, Sam straightened her back. “ You should let Evelyn go because it’s the right thing to do. Because she’s too young to be of any use to you. She was born into her role here as much as you were born into yours. There must have been times in your life you wished you could be normal. Times you wished you could go outside the palace and play with all of the
other boys?” She paused to take a deep breath. “ You scare her.”
The Prince stood and walked up to her, stopping merely inches away so that when he spoke, his breath rustled her hair. “ Do I scare you, Samantha?”
Defiantly, willing her body not to give her away, Sam raised her head to meet his gaze and stared unflinchingly into his eyes. “ No.”
Surprisingly, he chuckled with mirth. “ Samantha, you never fail to amuse me.” Suddenly, his face lost all traces of humour and he grasped her upper arms firmly, leaning in close to glare menacingly at her. “ You should be, Samantha. You should be very afraid of me.” As abruptly as it came, his threatening stance disappeared as he backed off. “ So. You have yet to tell me what I could gain from letting Evelyn be free to leave.”
“ What would you want?” She asked, fighting to keep her tone even.
Grinning, Prince Taylin sat back down in his chair. “ What would *you* personally be willing to give, Samantha? How close are you and Evelyn? How much do you *really* value her welfare?”
“ Tell me what you want me to do and I’ll tell you if I agree,” Sam responded coolly, keeping her expression neutral despite feeling terrified at what he might say on the inside.
“ I will allow Evelyn to leave with your Colonel,” he began with a smile. “ If you consent to being my Queen and help me convince my father he is too old to continue ruling Velenthia. You will easily be able to sway his decision, Samantha; you have more power over him than my mother ever did. With you at my side, I will be able to control Velenthia how I want to, with no
interference from my father.”
“ What?” Staring at him in utter-shock, Sam couldn’t believe what she was hearing to be true. “ You want me to *marry* you.. and you want me to tell your father to give up the throne and turn his kingdom over to you?”
“ Basically, yes.” The Prince smiled at her. “ Wonderful plan, isn’t it? I can see it clearly, Samantha. You would make me a very happy King. And I could promise to stay loyal to you, without taking a mistress.” He arched an eyebrow suggestively. “ If what I hear is true, you are more than enough for one man.”
Shaking her head, Sam turned away from him, disgusted at his proposition and appalled that she was actually considering it. “ You can’t marry me,” she decided eventually, turning back to him. “ I’m a courtesan, you’re a Prince. Surely that isn’t allowed?”
“ If I say it is allowed, it shall be,” Prince Taylin assured her, obviously pleased with himself. “ Do not worry yourself, Samantha. Our marriage will be celebrated by the people of Velenthia. An ordinary woman – as ordinary as you could be – marrying a Prince. It is like those fairytales my father is so fond of hearing from your world, is it not?”
“ Not really,” Sam mumbled, shaking her head again to clear her thoughts. “ I need some time to think about this. I can’t decide.. I need more time. It’s a big decision.”
“ You have till midday tomorrow,” the Prince told her with a smile. “ I will make the necessary arrangements so that if you consent, the wedding will take place tomorrow.”
“ Tomorrow?” She felt her bottom jaw drop again. “ That soon?”
“ These things, Samantha,” he murmured, “ are best not left too long or the moment passes. Perhaps, if you keep me waiting, I will change my mind and you will not be able to convince me to let Evelyn go.” He got to his feet as she started walking towards the door. “ Remember, Samantha. This is the only option I will give you, the only time I will be lenient. You must ask yourself, does Evelyn mean so much to you that you will trade your freedom for hers?”
Unsure how to answer, Sam left quickly, heading straight for her room. She couldn’t face seeing any of her friends or the King. She needed time to think.
~*~
She had been hoping her absence would go unnoticed but she wasn’t that lucky. Within an hour of breakfast being over, there was a soft knock on the door that she recognised to belong to Janet. She sat up, smiling as she remembered all of the times she’d be able to confide in Janet over the years, knowing without a doubt that if there was only one person she was going to
feel comfortable sharing her problems with, then it was Janet. Feeling a little better at the thought of being able to talk her predicament over with one of her best friends, Sam got off the bed and made her way to the door, relieved to find only Janet standing on the other side.
“ Phew,” Janet smiled. “ I thought for a moment I’d followed the directions wrong and got the wrong room.” Her relief and smile dissipated, seeing something in Sam’s face that set her on edge. “ Sam? Are you okay?”
“ Not really,” Sam forced a smile for appearances sake and opened the door fully to allow Janet to enter. “ I *really* need to your advice on something. Something.. big.”
“ Well.” Janet sat down on the bed and wriggled around to make herself comfortable. “ I’m all yours for the day. The King said I wouldn’t be granted access to the med. Labs until tomorrow so.. you have my undivided attention.”
“ Where is everyone else?” Sam asked softly, locking the door behind her before joining Janet on the bed.
Shrugging, Janet stretched out languidly. “ I sent them out for the day, telling them we needed a chance to do some serious girl-talk. Surprisingly enough, they didn’t put up too much of a fight. I don’t think they really wanted to spend the day listening to us go on and on about the colours of nail varnish and other mundane things men think women talk about.”
“ I don’t think we’ve *ever* talked about the colour of nail varnish,” Sam murmured as she curled up on her side, facing her friend. It was deceptive how comfortable she seemed, how.. at home.. she felt.“ Have we?”
“ No. But we can always start, I guess.” Raising herself up on her elbows, Janet looked down on her friend, concern shining in her brown eyes. “ I get the feeling what you want to talk about is more serious than nail varnish or even these clothes we’re being made to wear. Spill it, Sam. You said it was a biggie. Prove it.”
“ Oh, it’s a biggie,” Sam sighed. “ A real big dilemma.”
“ Come on.. Share!” Janet insisted, wanting to know what was causing her friend such confusion.
Closing her eyes, Sam swallowed the lump in her throat. “ I went to see Prince Taylin this morning. About Evelyn. I wanted to know if there was any way he would change his mind and let her go through the Stargate with you guys in a few days time.”
“ And is there?” Janet pressed when Sam seemed to falter.
Giving Janet a short nod, Sam opened pained eyes. “ Prince Taylin said he’d let her go.. On two conditions. One being that I help him convince his father to give up the throne and hand over his royal title. The other.. The other being that I consent to marry him. He wants me to be his wife, Janet.” She bit her lip to stop it from quivering, feeling more helpless than she had in a long time. “ He said it would be a trade. My freedom for Evelyn’s. I don’t know what to do.” She turned to Janet, her expression beseeching. “ What do I do? I really need your advice on this one, Janet.”
“ Sam..” Janet started to say something but stopped, her mouth closing with an audible snap. “ I can’t tell you what to do,” she answered eventually. “ I can give you my opinion.. But it’s up to you in the end.”
“ What’s your opinion?” Sam asked. “ Anything you have to say will be helpful. I’m.. I don’t want to say yes to him. I *really* don’t want to be trapped in a marriage with him.. But I can’t just sit by and let Evelyn be forced into staying here. Not now she’s pregnant.. If the Prince finds out she’s with child.. He’ll have the pregnancy terminated and I know she doesn’t want that. God, Janet, I’m so confused. I’ve got less than twenty-four hours to decide what to do, and if I agree to it, the Prince wants us to get married tomorrow!”
“ My opinion,” Janet murmured calmly, taking Sam’s hand. “ Is that although your heart is telling you one thing, your head has to be telling you another. Marrying this guy.. No. You can’t do that, in my opinion. I’ve heard what he did to you or almost did to you and I think marrying him is leaving yourself open to that kind of treatment for the rest of your life. However,” she smiled weakly. “ This is where I get contradictive. I don’t believe Evelyn deserves that either. I don’t think she should have to stay here with him and I don’t think you could live with yourself if you let that happen.”
“ So what do I do?” Sam questioned, confused as much as helped by Janet’s reply and advice. “ What do you think I should do?”
“ Leave,” Janet stated bluntly. “ You, Evelyn and Nicholi. I think the three of you should just pack your things and leave with the rest of us. Don’t wait to be given permission, don’t ask for your freedom or make deals to keep it. It’s *yours*. It’s your right to be able to do what you want to do.”
Shaking her head, Sam cleared her throat to dislodge the unshed tears there. “ I want to be able to agree to that, Janet. But the King..”
“ Will have to learn to deal with the consequences,” Janet finished sharply. “ He had no right keeping you here in the first place, Sam. Answer me honestly, when you first came here before you developed your relationship with him, did you want to go home?”
“ Of course I did!” Sam answered vehemently. “ I still want to go home, I just don’t see how I can with everything being as it is..”
“ Then why didn’t you come home?” Janet continued relentlessly. “ You didn’t come home because you felt you had your freedom taken from you, your free-will to choose. The King, although he’s nicer than Prince Taylin, is just the same as his son. He kept you here against your will and made your decisions for you, just like his son is doing now.” She squeezed Sam’s hand. “ I know you won’t be able to accept what I’m saying but you asked for my opinion and I’m giving it to you. Leave. Don’t let someone else tell you what to do.”
“ I wish I could,” Sam mumbled, hiding her face in her pillow. “ Times like this I wish I was more like Major Carter than plain old Sam.”
Smiling softly, Janet reached over to hug her. “ There’s nothing wrong with Sam, and she’s not plain or old. She’s pretty great, you know.”
“ I wish I could believe that,” Sam murmured. “ But it seems like Major-Doctor Carter is the useful person. Not me.”
Making a quick decision, Janet got to her feet and held out a hand to Sam. “ I think we’ve had enough serious talk for one day. You have a lot to think about and a lot to decide.. But you’ve got till tomorrow. So.” She grinned mischievously when Sam accepted the hand she offered. “ It’s time for a distraction and you always told me I was good at those. Lets go for a walk
around the palace grounds and you can tell me all about your adventures here in Velenthia and about the people you’ve met.” She winked as Sam stood. “ We can even make fun of some of ‘em if it would make you feel better.”
It was a weak smile but a smile nevertheless that graced Sam’s features. “ Then what are we waiting for? It sounds like fun to me.”
She wasn’t able to forget the decision she had to make, but for a few carefree hours, she was able to forget about it, putting them out of her mind so she could enjoy some time with one of her best friends, knowing that it might be the last chance she got.
~*~
Morning came before she was ready for it. Sam got out of bed without waking Janet, who had fallen asleep beside her as they’d stayed awake until the small hours, gossiping about the people on Earth Sam used to know. It was the type of girl-talk gossip the guys couldn’t have told her about, the things only girl friends knew.
In an almost mechanical way, Sam got herself washed and dressed, slipping out of the room after writing Janet a short letter. She felt large amounts of regret and remorse; regret for not having done everything she wanted and remorse for having to let so many people down. She felt fear and uncertainty, afraid of what the future would bring and of what the consequences to her
actions would be.
Doubting herself even as she walked to her destination, Sam told herself she had no choice. She *had* to do this. She had come to care about Evelyn more than she had realised but she had no choice. This was the only decision she could have reached and been happy living with. It was the right thing to do.
It was the only way she could look in the mirror every morning and meet the eyes of the person staring back.
~*~
‘Dear Janet,
I know you are going to disapprove of my decision but after staying awake for most of the night thinking about it, I realise this is the only decision I could ever make. I’d like to believe it’s the only decision Major Carter would have made, and I’d like to hope that you will understand.
By the time you’ll have read this, I will already have given Prince Taylin my answer and the preparations will be underway. Please, don’t try to stop me. I *have* to do this, for my own piece of mind as well as Evelyn’s safety and that of her child.
I’m going to marry Prince Taylin. Not on the conditions he stated, on conditions of my own. If he refuses to compromise, there will be no wedding and I’ll admit defeat. The conditions are that he lets Evelyn go and agrees to give up in his quest of taking over the throne before his time. I’m going to suggest that once we’re married, we go and live in one of the other cities on the planet until he naturally succeeds his father. I will have nothing to do with any
plans in dethroning the King.
Enclosed with this letter is a journal. The book it’s written in was a gift from the King when I first arrived and it’s become a diary of everything I’ve been through since arriving here. I want you to take it back with you and use it to help fill in the gaps for General Hammond and my father. I’d like to think Cassandra and Evelyn might some day read it, too. Hopefully it will help explain why I’ve changed so much, and why I feel like I have to do this.
Please don’t try and stop me – all I want for you and the others to do now is leave. Take Evelyn and Nicholi and get somewhere safe as fast as you can.
Please make sure everyone knows I love them, and that I’ll be thinking of them even though I won’t be with them.
Take care of yourself,
All my love,
Sam.’
The letter fell from her numb fingers. Janet glanced at the watch on her wrist, wishing she knew what time it translated into being on Velenthia. Deciding she couldn’t risk having slept in, Janet ran from the room after picking up the journal and concealing it in her dress. She had to tell Colonel O’Neill and the rest of the team. Before Sam did something they would all regret.
~*~
“ Colonel O’Neill!” Janet burst into the dining room, her eyes wide as she struggled to catch her breath. She noticed the King was missing and felt dread start to rise in her chest. “ We’ve got to stop her!”
“ Stop who?” Jack stood, obviously alarmed by her appearance as Daniel walked over to her and put an arm around her shaking shoulders. “ Doc? Where’s Carter? I thought you spent last night doing the girl-talk thing?”
“ We did,” Janet breathed heavily, her eyes wide. “ But Sam.. Prince Taylin gave her an ultimatum. He said he’d let Evelyn go free if Sam agreed to marry him. He said she had till today to decide and that if she said yes, they’d be married before the day was over, probably so she couldn’t change her mind. I woke up this morning to find a letter Sam had written, telling me it was the only way and that she was going to say yes.” Her tone grew desperate. “ We have to stop her!”
“ Damn it,” Jack swore as he strode over to the door, pulling it open with such force the handle almost came off in his hand. “ I knew that bastard was up to something.”
“ We can’t let her go through with this, Jack,” Daniel piped up as he, Janet and Teal’c followed their leader, trying to match his pace. “ After what he did to her before.. if she marries him..”
Jack lashed out at a nearby wall, kicking it so hard he felt shivers of pain climb up his leg as he jarred it, trying his best not to show how much it hurt. “ I know that, Daniel. I *know*.” He stopped as they approached a crossroad of hallways. “ Now. Which way is that chapel-thing that tour guide showed us? The place the King married his wife?”
“ I don’t remember,” Daniel admitted downheartedly, hanging his head as Janet squeezed his arm gently.
“ Would Evelyn not know, O’Neill?” Teal’c reminded them. He was heading in the direction of Evelyn’s room before anyone answered, as determined as the rest of them to put a stop to the wedding.
~*~
With Evelyn’s help, SG-1 and Janet managed to find the chapel-like area of the palace. They were surprised to find it was brimming with people by the time they got there, and were disheartened to see the King at the front of the church, looking decidedly unhappy with the proceedings as his son paced, grinning broadly. Turning, Prince Taylin noticed them and made
some motions with his hands. Within seconds, they were surrounded by guards who escorted them down the aisle to the front pew where the Prince was waiting for them.
“ My friends,” he greeted them in a voice that dripped insincerity. “ I am honoured you could make it. Samantha will be so pleased you could join us.” He ushered them to the pew, the guards standing close by, sitting either side of them to make sure they did as the Prince told them to. “ I reserved the best seats for you. You will have a clear view of the ceremony from here.”
He leaned down to whisper to Jack, sending a silent warning with his eyes. “ Do not think about disrupting my wedding. I will not hesitate in having you and all of your friends killed if you do.” He leaned closer, speaking directly into Jack’s ear. “ And I will make Samantha pay in other, more interesting ways.”
Pulling back with a chuckle that turned into full-blown laughter at Jack’s expression, the Prince resumed his position at the front of the congregation. Music started to play and the doors SG-1 had just stepped in through opened.
A distraught Karalynn led the way down the aisle, a forced smile that was easily seen through on her face. A tear slipped down her cheeks as she caught sight of the ashen face of Evelyn and Sam’s friends in the first pew. Behind her, a resigned Samantha Carter walked as slowly as she could, her heart pounding in her chest as she fought valiantly to keep her tears at bay.
Jack did as all the other guests did and twisted in his seat to get a glimpse of the bride. Instead of joining in with their gasps and whispered comments at how beautiful she looked, he stared at her, his heart clenching painfully. She *did* look beautiful, in an intricately designed gown of cream silk and gold embroidery. The only thing that wasn’t beautiful was the look in her eyes. The pain, the reluctance, the fear.
Her eyes locked with his and she pleaded with him not to interrupt. She *had* to do this. She would never forgive him if he stopped her and let Evelyn take her place. Nodding discreetly, Jack swallowed the lump in his throat even as the guard at his side sent him a warning glare.
Throughout the ceremony, Sam was only aware of two things. One was the words that were coming out of her mouth and the feeling she had that she was saying them to the wrong man; the other was the intense feeling of someone’s gaze burning into her back, a reminder that Jack was there and he was watching the whole thing.
Prince Taylin slid the ring on her finger and threw a triumphant look in the direction of his father and those in the first pew. Sam looked down at her hand and saw the shimmer of gold there, a seemingly permanent fixture. A solitary tear trickled from her eye down her cheek as she stared at it, a symbol of what was now her role in life.
The wife of a husband she would never love.
~*~
Celebrations were had all over the city, although many failed to understand why everything had happened so quickly. In the palace, however, the mood was very different, very sombre. Everyone but the Prince seemed to think what had happened was something to mourn, not celebrate. SG-1, Evelyn and Janet had been escorted back to their rooms by guards and it was Sam’s understanding that the guards had been assigned to watch over them all night.
She was thankful, though, when her new husband over-compensated for everyone’s lack of enthusiasm and drank almost all of the wine he had ordered. She watched him be escorted by two guards to his room - *their* room – with a sinking heart, knowing she was expected to join him.
“ I will never understand why you did this, Samantha,” the King approached her, his face pale and lined, his movements weak and shaky like an invalids. He was having trouble standing, feeling light-headed, a light sweat breaking out across his brow but he resisted everyone’s attempts at leading him away. He insisted he needed to speak to his new daughter before he could sleep. “ Your act of compassion.. Of sacrifice.. It is unrivalled by any other I know.” He brought a trembling hand to her cheek in time to catch a tear that fell from her eyes. “ I wish you hadn’t done it, Samantha. I wish you had not married my son.”
“ I had no choice,” Sam murmured despondently. She noticed the looks she was receiving off some of the guests and shifted uncomfortably. “ I think that’s my cue to leave.” ‘And join my husband,’ was what she chose not to say.
The King nodded and let her go, watching sadly as she went. She was barely out of the room before his legs gave out on him and Akima was there with Lord Davin, helping to get him in a chair. “ What have I done,” the King mumbled as he was sat down and fussed over. “ What have I done?”
~*~
Trying her hardest not to wake her new husband, Sam changed for bed and climbed in beside him, doing her best to keep as much distance as possible between them. She curled up on the edge of the bed, withdrawing as much into herself as she could, closing her eyes tightly as he continued to snore loudly beside her.
Silent tears began to slip out from under her eyelids as she felt the heavy weight of the gold band on her finger, a constant reminder of what she’d done. A possible reminder of her biggest mistake.
~*~
In his room on the other side of the palace, Jack stared blindly out of the window. He sat slumped in the uncomfortable chair, knowing his back was going to protest about his position in the morning but being too depressed to care.
She was gone.
She was on the same planet, in the same city, in the same building, breathing the same air, sleeping under the same stars.. And yet, it felt like she was further away than it had done when he was Earth with no idea of where she was.
At least then there had been hope. Now there was none.
He hadn’t slept well the night before, having become accustomed to having her beside him, no matter how much he’d tried not to get too used to the feeling. At the moment, it felt to Jack as though he’d never sleep again.
He didn’t know how he could, knowing she was somewhere with someone else.. With her husband, with a man he vowed to protect her from.. He’d failed. Just like he’d failed her all those months ago by letting her be taken, he’d failed her again. He’d let her go.
She was gone. And he missed her. And it hurt knowing she was lying within arms reach of someone other than him. It hurt a lot.
More than he cared to admit.
~*~
“And if I don't need your touch
Why do I miss you so much, tonight.
If it's just frustration
Why is my heart aching
To hold you forever
Give a part of me I thought I'd never
Give again to someone I could lose
If I'm not in love with you.”
~ ‘If I’m Not In Love’, Faith Hill.
~*~
~*~
Part Twelve
~*~
“You are all I'll ever want, but this I am denied
Sometimes in my darkest thoughts, I wish I'd never learn
What it is to be in love and have that love returned.”
~ ‘Written in the Stars’, LeAnn Rimes and Elton John
~*~
She was up and out of the room before Prince Taylin woke up. After a restless night of purposely trying to stay awake without letting her guard down, Sam was exhausted. She dressed quickly and left for the dining room as soon as she could. No one else was there by the time she arrived so she curled up in one of the chairs by the fire, attempting to get an hours sleep before anyone put in an appearance.
“ You couldn’t sleep, either, huh?” She jumped when she heard his voice, turning round as she tried to calm her racing pulse. “ Sorry,” Jack apologised easing himself into the other chair. “ I didn’t mean to startle you.”
“ S’kay,” she mumbled, leaning back into the chair again as her eyes slid shut. “ And in answer to your question, I don’t think I slept at all last night.”
“ Your husband keep you up all night?” He regretted it the moment the words left his mouth, seeing her eyelids open immediately in hurt surprise. “ I didn’t mean that.”
“ Yes, you did,” she responded softly. “ Otherwise you wouldn’t have said it in the first place. You wouldn’t have been thinking it.”
Shifting uncomfortably, Jack broke eye contact, looking away from the pain in her eyes. “ Sorry.”
“ Nothing happened,” she told him flatly. “ He was passed out by the time I got there and I left this morning before he could wake up.”
“ You seem to have a habit of doing that,” he mumbled. “ Your husband, Doc, Evelyn, me. You always leave before the person you’re with wakes up.”
She didn’t try to deny it, she just nodded her agreement. “ Yeah, I do. It’s easier that way. No awkward moments, no time for regrets.. Simple.”
“ Regrets?” He leaned forward slightly in his chair, trying to see her eyes so he could read what she was feeling. Her face was expressionless, giving nothing away. It rarely did. Her eyes, however, they were how he knew what she was feeling – when she let him see into them, that was. “ You think Doc and Evelyn would regret spending the night with you?”
“ No.” She kept her eyes lowered, knowing he was trying to discern what she was feeling through them. “ But we’re not talking about Evelyn, Janet or even Prince Taylin, are we, Colonel?” She raised her face to his, challenging him to deny it.
“ So you think I’d regret it?” He arched an eyebrow. “ How could I regret it? We did nothing to regret, we fell asleep end of story.”
“ Bet that’s not what Captain Gardam’s telling everyone on base,” she said with a soft sigh. “ You know, this is a totally redundant conversation. It doesn’t matter what regrets either of us have, it doesn’t even matter what she’s been saying.” She swallowed the unshed tears in her throat. “ I can’t go back home now, anyway. There’s no chance. No hope.” Inhaling a shuddery breath, she deftly brushed away the sole tear that escaped with her fingers. “ You guys should leave immediately, I have no way of knowing how long the Prince is going to tolerate you being here. You should take Evie and Nicholi before he changes his mind.”
“ I’ve told you before and I’ll tell you again,” Jack murmured, reaching out for her hands. “ We’re *not* leaving without you. Not now, not ever.”
Smiling wryly, Sam entwined her fingers with his, knowing it might be the last chance she had to share any kind of intimacy with him. “ You have no choice. You have to let me go. There was a chance before.. A possibility that we’d somehow find a way to get me out of this place but there isn’t now. I’m *married*. I agreed to get married, I made a promise. And I never go back on my promises, Colonel.”
“ Neither do I,” he returned. “ And I made a promise to myself as well as the others that I’d bring you home. I have no intention of breaking that promise. So. I’m not giving up and I don’t think you should either.”
“ Too late for that,” Sam muttered, pulling her fingers away. “ I gave up the moment this went on my finger.” She held up her hand with the wedding band on, staring at it with contempt. “ So should you have done.”
Shaking his head, Jack leaned back in his chair. “ I never give up. Would’ve thought you’d learnt that about me by now, Carter.”
Smiling despite herself, she rolled her eyes. “ Oh, yeah. I learnt that a *long* time ago. I guess I was hoping something had changed over the last few months but I guess, since you’re here now, you didn’t give up on me, did you?” She sighed deeply and shook her head, trying to get a grasp on her feelings and the conversation. When had it started getting away from her? “
Shame you came this far only to find a dead end. You know, no one could fault you for giving up now. There’s nothing you can do. There’s nothing anyone can do. It’s time you gave up, Jack. It’s time you let me go and got on with your own life.”
“ Not gonna happen, Sam.” He responded, using her first name just as she’d used his, setting a personal tone to the conversation. “ I’ve only ever given up twice before, a long time ago. One was when Charlie died, and the other was when I was stuck on Edora. I gave up on you then and I shouldn’t have. I won’t make that mistake again.”
“ It’s a little different this time,” she protested. “ I’m the one trapped on a planet light-years from home and even a particle beam generator isn’t going to help. It’s more complicated this time.”
“ Important things usually are complicated,” he murmured. “ That just means you’ve got to work a little bit harder to get what you want. Though I’m finding it difficult to believe I’m going to have to work harder than you did on that particle-thing. Didn’t you defy the laws of physics or something with that thing?”
“ Something like that,” she answered with a small smile. “ But that isn’t going to help us in this situation. Otherwise I’d give you instructions for how to make one and I'd be out of here.”
“ True, but the point is..” Jack looked up, catching her eyes. “ You didn’t give up on me then. You found a way to get me out of that situation and now it’s my turn to return the favour. We’ll figure something out. If you can defy the laws of physics to bring me home, I’m sure with Danny and Teal’c and Doc, we can find a way to defy the laws of Velenthia to bring you home.
Just don’t make my mistake and give up on us because we’re not going to give up on you.”
Sam just nodded, her fingers finding his again. They didn’t say anything else, they just held hands and sat in their respective chairs. Twenty minutes later when the rest of their team found them, they were still in the same position, clinging to the others hand even in sleep.
~*~
Prince Taylin woke up and a groan. His head was pounding and his mouth felt dry. Grumbling, he fumbled around for a goblet of water, taking a big, long gulp from the goblet he found greedily. He sat up and the previous days events came back to him with a sudden burst of clarity.
Narrowing his eyes, he scrutinised the room around him, looking for any signs of his wife, telling himself she wouldn’t be stupid enough to disgrace or anger him by spending their wedding night with another man. A pleased smile tugged up the corners of his mouth as he saw the bed beside him had been slept him, even as he searched his mind for any foggy recollection of her joining him.
He couldn’t remember anything past drinking his seventh goblet of wine, toasting his father for bringing her to Velenthia in the first place.
Gingerly, Prince Taylin climbed out of bed, swaying on his feet. He stumbled around the room, opening the door to find his attendants waiting expectantly outside. With a grunt, he invited them in. The three attendants, two men and one woman, bustled around him, ushering him into the bathroom where they cleaned him and then back to the bedroom where they dried and dressed him. In all this time, the Prince didn’t lift a single finger to help.
“ You can go now,” he ordered them briskly once they’d finished, thanking them being the last thing on his mind. In his mind, they should feel privileged. He was the Prince, the soon-to-be King. They should be pleased to have the honour of helping him prepare himself.
“ Your Majesty,” one of the young men lingered behind, nervously bowing to his Prince.
“ Yes? What is it?” Prince Taylin snapped, anxious to be left alone so he could find Samantha and greet her in the way a husband had the right to greet his wife. “ Get on with it, boy. I don’t have time to waste.”
“ I was given a note for you, your Majesty.” The young man bowed again and fumbled around in his pocket, eventually withdrawing a piece of folded paper. Bowing again, he handed it to the Prince with a shaking hand. “ I will leave you now, your Majesty.”
The Prince didn’t hear him. He snatched the piece of paper and waited until he heard the door shut, opening the letter and devouring its contents with eager eyes:
‘Meet me in the gardens, after the evening meal. I have a proposition for you.’
The note was signed from ‘Colonel O’Neill’, and Prince Taylin was immediately intrigued. He had no intention of giving up his new wife but he decided he would meet the traveller, for his own amusement if not for curiosity’s sake. Grinning, Prince Taylin folded the note and put it in his breast pocket, pushing himself to his feet.
Their meeting wouldn’t take place until later. In the meantime, he had his wife to find.
~*~
Sam and Jack awoke to find their friends eating breakfast alone, talking in soft, quiet voices. They both blushed on realising their hands were still joined and quickly pulled away, embarrassment reining over the disappointment they both concealed.
“ Well, look who’s awake,” Janet noticed them first, smiling at Sam as she searched her friend for any sign of bruises or tears. She was relieved to find none, moving her chair aside so Sam could sit beside her at the table. “ Good morning.”
“ Morning,” Sam mumbled, sitting down. She stifled a yawn with her hand and gave the food a cursory glance, quickly deciding she wasn’t feeling up to eating anything, settling for a goblet of fruit juice. She looked around the faces at the table and frowned. “ Where’s Evelyn? I thought she’d be with you guys..”
“ She’s free now,” Daniel told her, trying to look happy when all he could think about was *why* she was free. “ Nicholi made her pack her things yesterday and took her back to his house. Bernadette and Torin insisted on it after they found out why you’d.. Why you married Prince Taylin. They said they couldn’t let you do that for no reason.”
“ Good.” Sam nodded, satisfied with the answer. At least it meant Prince Taylin was holding true to his side of the bargain. “ I don’t suppose any of you have seen the King this morning, have you? He was supposed to join us for breakfast.” They all shook their heads and she felt something inside her stir. It wasn’t unusual for the King to choose to eat breakfast alone but
she’d expected him to join them to keep an eye on how his son was treating her. She had been almost certain he’d be there. Noticing her companions were looking at her, she forced a smile. “ I’ll see him later, I’m sure it’s nothing.”
No sooner were the words out of her mouth, the door to the dining room opened. Karalynn stepped in, looking worried as she approached Sam, relief dawning in her eyes when she saw the younger woman was bearing no signs of having being hurt during the night. “ Samantha,” she lowered her voice. “ I’ve been sent to request your presence in the King’s sleeping chambers.”
“ Why?” Immediately suspicious, Sam tried to quell the unease she felt stirring in her stomach. “ Is he okay?”
Karalynn shook her head. “ I’m sorry, Samantha. He took ill late last night. He cannot leave his bed.” The slightly older woman squeezed her shoulder supportively. “ He’s asking for you.”
Alarm and dread made their way through her body as Sam stood on legs that felt weak. Wordlessly, she half-ran from the room with Karalynn trailing her, her heart pounding in her chest. She felt a knot of fear tighten itself in her stomach as she saw the ashen-faced servants and aides coming from the direction of the King’s room, telling herself he was going to be okay. He *had* to be. She was counting on him to help her deal with her marriage to Prince Taylin.
“ Samantha, my love.” Prince Taylin was there to meet her at the doors to his father’s room, his expression one of sadness though his eyes revealed his true feelings. “ It appears Father is ill. We will not be able to leave Velenthia for one of the other cities until he is well. I could send you on without me..?”
“ No,” she shook her head, refusing the offer. “ I’m not leaving him.”
“ Very well,” Prince Taylin nodded, having been expecting the answer. “ He is asking for you, but don’t stay too long. We don’t want to wear him out now, do we?”
Clenching her jaw at the tone he used that seemed to suggest otherwise, Sam pushed by him and into the room, barely managing to suppress a gasp at the sight of the frail, old man lying on the bed. The King had aged decades over night, all signs of his deceptively youthful appearance having been devoured by grief.
“ Samantha,” he croaked, his voice dry and raw. He held out his hand for her to take, the action taking up a lot of strength. “ Thank you.. for joining.. me.”
Taking his hand, Sam sat on the bed beside him, taking over the task of wiping the thin sheen of sweat from his forehead with a damp cloth from the woman who had been doing it. “ What’s wrong with you?” She asked him softly, fighting to keep the tears at bay at seeing him like this. “ What happened?”
The King didn’t answer, he shook his head weakly and coughed, clutching her hand as though it were his lifeline.
“ What happened?” Sam asked again, raising her voice as she looked to Lord Akima, the King’s constant advisor and one of his oldest friends. “ What’s wrong with him?”
“ We do not know, Samantha,” Lord Akima answered sadly, his voice pained. “ It started last night and he has been deteriorating since then.”
“ Has he been to the facility? Have the doctors down there taken a look at him?” Sam demanded, not wanting to believe there was nothing they could do.
Akima nodded, his expression sympathetic. “ They said his illness is not caused by a physical ailment therefore they can’t treat him.”
She frowned as the King tightened his grip on her hand. “ If it’s not physical, what is it?”
“ Forgive me, Samantha,” the King gasped, diverting her attention from her current line of thought. “ Please forgive me.. for being a selfish.. fool.. For being.. a coward.”
“ There’s nothing to forgive,” she murmured, dropping the cloth so she could use her other hand to wipe the tears away from her cheeks. “ You haven’t done anything I need to forgive you for.”
The King shook his head in protest. “ I.. I let you.. I let you marry him. I.. should have.. stopped.. Should have.. Let you go.” He closed his eyes, his breathing laboured. “ Samantha.. Please. Say you.. Say you forgive.. me.”
“ I forgive you,” she whispered brokenly. “ There was never anything to forgive.”
Able to find peace at her words, the King allowed himself to be swept away. With a hand she couldn’t keep steady, Sam reached out and touched his neck, feeling for a pulse. Nothing could compare to the relief she felt at finding one, no matter how weak it was. At least he was still alive.
Moving from the bed, Sam settled herself into one of the chairs, resolute that she would be there when he woke up, ready to give him whatever he needed, prepared to tell him whatever he wanted to hear.
~*~
He felt put out by his father’s illness. Prince Taylin sat on one of the benches in the garden, the letter he’d received that morning in his hand. His mind wasn’t on his meeting, however, it was on his father’s weak state and the anger and resentment he felt towards him for it.
Prince Taylin had been married for just over a day and yet he hadn’t spent a moment alone with his wife – not one he could remember. Instead, the attention she should have been lashing on him from spent on his father, on the invalid with the illness no one could identify. Someone had suggested it was grief, that the King was ill because he was greatly distressed about something but Prince Taylin scoffed at that idea. There was nothing his father could be distressed about. His son was married and the woman he loved like a daughter now was his daughter. There was nothing distressing about that, not that the Prince could see anyway.
Sighing deeply, Prince Taylin shook his head. “ Sometimes,” he told the air around him. “ I wish he’d just die so Samantha would stop fussing over him and be with me.”
“ Talking to yourself, old friend?” Lord Jalen seemingly appeared out of nowhere, grinning at the startled expression on the Prince’s face. “ They say it is the first sign of madness.”
“ Jalen!” Prince Taylin stood and embraced his friend, clapping him on the back. “ It has been a while, my friend. I did not see you yesterday at the ceremony. I assume you’ve heard the good news?”
Jalen smiled and sat down on the bench next to the Prince. “ Who in all of Velenthia is unaware our Prince has found himself a wife? And a very beautiful one at that.” Jalen grinned deviously. “ Have you had a chance to teach her some manners yet? I hear Samantha is more outspoken than a lady should be, let alone a future Queen.”
“ Ah, she is fierce,” Prince Taylin agreed with a wink. “ As of yet, she has gone untaught. That will all change when Father recovers or dies and I have her to myself.”
“ Which would you prefer?” Jalen’s question took him by surprise. “ Between death or recovery?” Jalen clarified. He gave the Prince a reassuring grin. “ Just between us old friends. I swear to you no one else will learn of what we say.”
Set at ease by Jalen’s promise, Prince Taylin matched the grin with a sly one of his own. “ I would prefer death, of course, Jalen. What more could a man want than a beautiful woman to serve at his side throughout his life and a kingdom to rule over? Samantha cares greatly for my father, and he for her. Until he is gone.. I will never truly have her to myself.”
“ Then I will pray for you,” Jalen stated decisively. “ You will need her to yourself if you are to properly teach her the ways of a Velenthian wife.”
“ That I will.” Prince Taylin agreed wholeheartedly. He turned to Jalen with a curious expression arranging his features. “ So what brings you here at this late hour, Jalen?”
“ I was going to ask you the same thing, Taylin,” Jalen responded good-naturedly. “ I would have expected you to be spending the evening with your new bride, acquainting yourselves with one another.”
“ If it weren’t for my father, we would be,” Taylin admitted with a sigh. “ So, you have not yet answered my question. What brings you to the palace? I know I am here because I have plans to meet someone.”
“ I needed some air,” Jalen answered simply. “ But I must be leaving now, my wife will worry if I do not return to her soon.” Jalen stood and bowed politely. Prince Taylin watched his friend depart and sighed heavily, the cold chill of the evening windings its way around him.
The hairs on the back of his neck stood up on end as he sensed someone’s presence. He stood and walked in a circle, searching the darkness around him for any signs of someone else.
“ Hello? Colonel O’Neill? Is that you?” He stared, unable to see anything but he felt it. He could sense someone there, watching him.
Unexpectedly, he was attacked from behind, the assault leaving him breathless. He was caught in a strong vice around his throat as he struggled to breathe. He clawed at the gloved hands on his neck, his eyes bulging from their sockets as his lungs strained to catch enough air to sustain him.
His attacker tightened his hold around his neck and Prince Taylin saw the world dim, darkness devouring what little light the stars and moon gave him. Abruptly, his attacker let go and he fell to his knees, gasping. Light slowly started to filter back into his world as the air made its way back into his lungs..
A scream of agony escaped his lips, a wild animalistic howl of pain. Slumping forward, dizziness set in as he felt the blood leave his body through the deep gash created by the knife in his back.
The attacker stood emotionlessly over the Prince as he breathed his last breath and died an excruciating death. A gloved hand reached down and picked up the note the Prince had dropped in the hectic struggle, leaving a bloody fingerprint next to the name hastily scrawled on the piece of paper. Smirking, the attacker strategically placed the note in the Prince’s clenched fists, backing away slowly.
His words were carried on the wind, an apology to the man who’s life he had taken.
“ I’m sorry, old friend. You had something I want.”
Slinking back into the shadows, there was no sign anyone had been there minutes later when the guards arrived to investigate the reports of a wild animal roaming the grounds of the palace. They didn’t find the animal but they found the person responsible for making the noise the courtesans had mistaken as being an animal.
Lying at an awkward angle, a frozen expression of disbelief on his face, was Prince Taylin, clutching a note that was soaked with his own blood, a note that held the only evidence the guards had to use against the murderer.
~*~
Before dawn the following morning, the guards knocked loudly on one of the palace’s doors. They didn’t wait to be invited in. Breaking the door, they stormed the room, grasping the sleepy occupant and placing him under arrest, dragging him from his room, muffling his protests with their gloved hands.
Hearing the disturbance, Daniel and Teal’c opened their doors, only to find there were more guards standing at attention outside their rooms. Down the corridor, Janet did the same.
“ What’s going on?” She asked sleepily, alarmed to find a guard standing outside her door. She looked down the hallway into Daniel and Teal’c quizzical faces and noticed one of them was missing. “ Daniel, where’s Colonel O’Neill?”
“ I don’t..” Daniel started to answer but was cut off by a guard roughly shoving him back into his room at the same time as Janet and Teal’c were ‘escorted’ back into their rooms. “ What did I do? Where’s Jack?”
“ Your leader has been arrested,” the guard told him bluntly, his expression one of disgust. “ Be careful what you say or you will be charged as an accomplice.”
“ Charged with what?” Daniel wanted to know, worried for his friend.
“ Murder.” The Guard started to leave the room, preparing to lock in behind him when Daniel stopped him with another question.
“ Whose murder?”
The guard cast him a pitiful look. “ Prince Taylin.” He started to close the door, a sickening smile arranging his lips as he looked at Daniel. “ The punishment for such a crime is death. Your leader will be executed at first light tomorrow. Then you will be set free.”
With a cold laugh, the guard slammed the door, joining his colleagues out in the hallway where they stood at attention, waiting for news that the King had been told of his son’s death and that the Prince’s bride had been told she was a widow.
~*~
“ Samantha.” Akima softly shook the young woman in her chair, his face grave and pale. “ Samantha, please. Wake up.”
Snapping awake, Sam took in the pallor of his skin, her eyes automatically travelling to the King as she feared the worst, reaching for his wrist and searching for a pulse. Finding one, she felt a moment of relief, only to remember the expression on Akima’s face and feel her alarm growing once more. “ What is it?
“ I am sorry I have to be the one to tell you this, Samantha,” Akima bowed his head out of respect. “ Prince Taylin was attacked in the grounds of the palace last night. I am sorry to tell you your husband is dead.” He raised his eyes and gazed solemnly into hers. “ He was murdered.”
Opening her mouth, Sam found she had nothing to say. Closing it, she brought a hand to her mouth, stifling a gasp as she tried to get her still half-asleep mind to process what he was telling her. “ Prince Taylin.. Dead?”
“ I’m afraid so, Samantha,” Akima nodded. “ The guilty suspect has been arrested. His execution will take place at dawn tomorrow.”
Sensing there was something more, that something was wrong, Sam unwittingly tightened her grasp on the King’s hand , her eyes fearful. “ Who is it?”
“ One of the travellers,” Akima answered quietly. “ I believe you know him as Colonel O’Neill.”
“ I am sorry, Samantha,” it was the King, squeezing her hand. “ It will be hard for you to accept your friend is capable..”
“ No!” Sam shook her head and dropped his hand, disbelief ruling her features and voice. “ Colonel O’Neill couldn’t have.. He wouldn’t have killed Prince Taylin. He wouldn’t murder anyone in cold blood unless it was in self-defence.”
“ There was a letter found at the scene, Samantha,” Akima informed her softly, not wanting to cause her further distress. “ It was from Colonel O’Neill, asking Prince Taylin to meet him in the gardens.” He shifted uneasily. “ It has been suggested your Colonel killed the Prince out of jealousy, in an attempt at freeing you from your marriage. It has escaped no one’s notice that he is infatuated with you.”
Her eyes grew impossibly wide. “ Colonel O’Neill is *not* infatuated with me and he would *never* kill someone for those reasons! Please,” she turned to the king, her gaze imploring. “ You *have* to do something! Give him a trial so we can prove he didn’t do it, put off the execution for a few days. Please. I *know* him, he couldn’t do something like this.”
The King lifted a hand to her shoulder, the simple action using a lot of energy. “ I am sorry, my child. There is nothing I can do. Colonel O’Neill is the only suspect in my son’s murder and it is my duty to do what is just in memory of my son. There is nothing I can do, Samantha. Colonel O’Neill must die for what he has done. His companions will be confined to their rooms
until justice has been served. Then they will be escorted home.”
Shaking her head, Sam refused to believe it. She got up from her chair and ran from the room, her eyes stinging with tears. Seeking comfort in her room, Sam threw herself down onto the bed, her body trembling as she continued to disbelieve what everyone was telling her.
Jack had said he would do whatever necessary to take her home. Surely he hadn’t meant murder? No, she told herself firmly. He would never resort to murder, it wasn’t something the Colonel Jack O’Neill she had served under for over four years could do.
Then again, she was the first to admit eight months was a long time. She’d changed dramatically from the person she once was. Was it possible Jack had changed, too?
Her head told her it was possible but offered her no reason to believe it. Her heart told her it wasn’t feasible; he might have been through a lot during his time with the military but he wasn’t a cold-blooded killer. That was something she could never see him as.
But if he didn’t kill Prince Taylin, then who did? Who else had a motive, who else would gain something from his death?
Sam didn’t know but as she pushed herself up off her bed, wiping the tears from her face, she was determined to find out.
~*~
Confused, Jack sat alone in the cold, damp, smelly cell. He had been taken to a part of the palace he hadn't been shown on their tour. Somewhere dark and dank; it reminded him like the dungeons in fairytales of all palaces and castles. He guessed he was in a part of the palace basement away from the medical facility, the place where murderers and thieves were kept away
from the rest of the Velenthian people.
Why he was there, however, he wasn't sure.
He had been sleeping restlessly, tossing and turning, reliving the nightmares that had haunted him during the last eight months, the ones about Sam being out of reach no matter how hard he tried to get to her. She always proved to be illusive, right there in front of him but continuously too far away.
“ You!” A guard appeared, holding out a bowl of something unidentifiable. Jack assumed it was for him since he was the only one there, the other cells being unoccupied.
Warily, Jack walked the best he could with the heavy metal shackles around his ankles. He took the bowl from the guard, stopping himself from saying thank you at seeing the icy glare he got as he approached.
Moving back to the uncomfortable bench he'd been sitting on, Jack stared down at the contents of the bowl for a few seconds before putting it to one side, his stomach churning in protest at the thought of having to digest it. He glanced up and found the guard was still there, staring, studying him.
“ What did I do to deserve the special treatment?” He called out, his curiosity fully aroused by the guard’s cold demeanour.
“ All murderers get this treatment,” the guard stated unkindly. “ All murderers receive no mercy, and die for their crimes.”
“ Whoa, hold on.” Jack held his hand up, frowning deeply. “ You're calling *me* a murderer? Who'd I supposedly murder?”
The guard glared at him again as he turned to walk away. “ You murdered Prince Taylin. Your execution will be held tomorrow at dawn at bequest of the King and the Prince's widow.” Storming off, Jack found himself alone.
Prince's widow? His eyes widened as he realised that was Sam. Prince Taylin was dead? He was the suspect? Scrambling to his feet, he made his way back over to the bars of the cell, hitting them repeatedly with his fist. “ Hey! Come back here! Someone! Anyone! I didn't do anything! I'm innocent! I didn't kill anyone!”
“ That's what they all say,” the guard who'd brought him his food muttered as he continued walking away. “ It never changes anything. The penalty for murder is death, and no one ever escapes it.”
Jack continued to strike the bars confining him in his cell, protesting his innocence until he wore himself out, slumping to the damp ground with a groan. Burying his head in his hands, he prayed that wherever she was, Sam believed him.
That was all that mattered.
~*~
“ The hours pass so slowly
The life's slipping out of me
Is there a way out for me?
There must be a way out for me..”
~ ‘Out of the Shadows’, Sarah McLachlan.
~*~
~*~
Part Thirteen
~*~
“ Spend all your time waiting, for that second chance
For a break that would make it okay.
There's always one reason to feel not good enough
And it's hard at the end of the day.”
~ ‘Angel’, Sarah McLachlan
~*~
She spent the day trying to convince anyone she could of Jack’s innocence. Sam tried continuously to get to see him but she was constantly turned away and told by the guards that the prisoner was forbidden from seeing anyone till the morning of his execution. No matter how hard she tried to convince them it was important she talk to him, they treated her as though she were a child, putting her desperation down to the hysteria of a bereaved wife.
Daniel, Teal’c and Janet were still confined to their rooms and she was told she couldn’t see them either. The King himself ordered her to stay away from them, telling her softly that her interference would make things worse. The only thing he would allow her to do was sit and wait; there was nothing he could or would do to prevent the execution from taking place.
That was why Sam spent the night sitting at the window in her room, watching the sky intently, waiting for the sun to put in an appearance. In the seconds the sky started to get lighter, Sam pulled a shawl around her shoulders to fight off the early morning chill and made her way to the building Jack was being held in.
Somewhat reluctantly, the guards let her pass. She was escorted down to Jack’s cell where her heart skipped a beat at seeing his prone figure lying awkwardly on the cold floor.
“ Leave us.” She ordered the guard, waiting until he did as she asked before crouching down to be nearer to Jack. “ Colonel,” she called out softly, slipping a hand between the metal bars. “ Sir!” There was still no response and she was alarmed when her hand came into contact with the clammy skin of his forehead. “ Jack!” She cried out desperately, her voice growing louder. “
Wake up!”
“ Sam?” Disorientated, Jack sat up abruptly, her hand falling from his face. “ Carter?” He blinked groggily and turned to see her as she stood up. “ You’re really here?”
“ Yes.” She gave him a sad smile, clutching the bars between them with both of her hands. The small smile disappeared as a tear ran down her cheek. “ I’m so sorry, Colonel. I had no idea it would turn out like this.”
“ Hey.” He put his hand through the bars to catch her tear, his hand lingering at her face. “ It’s not your fault.” Is expression became troubled as he searched her face for something. “ You believe me, don’t you? That I’m innocent? I didn’t kill Prince Taylin, I swear..”
“ I believe you,” she assured him quickly. “ Your innocence was never in question.” She leaned into his hand, letting out a shaky breath. “ I tried to get you a trial and I tried to convince the King and Lord Akima you didn’t kill Taylin but they wouldn’t believe me. I can’t even get to the others because they’re being watched by armed guards until.. until your..”
“ Execution,” he finished for her. “ Yeah. I know. One of the guards told me.” He looked around the cell. “ No sign of any light in here. How much longer have I got?”
“ Not long,” she admitted hoarsely. “ They wouldn’t let me see you till first light. You *should* be executed at dawn but because it’s Prince Taylin.. They’re going to make a public example of you. In just over an hour, you’ll be taken outside to the gallows in the city centre by horse and cart.” She closed her eyes tightly. “ They’re going to.. to hang you in front of everyone as an example of what happens to murderers.”
“ Ya know I hate it when people make an example of me,” he joked lamely. She didn’t even try to crack a smile. “ Oh, come on. It wasn’t that bad.”
“ What are we going to do?” She asked desolately. “ No one will believe me when I tell them you didn’t do it.”
“ Then you don’t do anything,” Jack told her firmly. “ You wait till the others are free to go and you leave with them.”
“ You don’t understand. They won’t be allowed out of their rooms until you’re dead!” She exclaimed, dismissing the idea. Jack didn’t say anything else, he just looked at her, nodding when her eyes widened in shock. “ You’re saying we let you die? That I sit by and watch..”
Caressing her cheek with his thumb, he nodded. “ I can’t see another way out of this. It was going to be hard enough getting you out of here when you were married to that guy.. Now I’m being accused of his murder.. The only good think I can think of coming from this is you using this distraction to get the Hell out of here.”
“ No.” Sam closed her eyes, refusing to even contemplate it. “ I won’t let you die just as I wouldn’t let Evelyn stay with that bastard. There has to be a way out of this, I won’t accept that there isn’t.”
“ Please, Sam.” He tried appealing to her. “ I made a vow to myself that I would get you home. Please help me keep it by going back with the others.”
“ Not without you,” she responded immediately, covering his hand with hers. “ You wouldn’t have left without me and I’m not leaving without you. We’ll find a way out of this. We always do, right?”
“ I hope so,” he smiled weakly. “ But if we can’t.. Promise me you’ll leave?”
Sam shook her head. “ I’m not making a promise I can’t keep.”
They lapsed into silence, both of them moving their hands to the bars, with his covering hers. Moving closer to the bars that divided them, he leaned down and brushed her knuckles with his lips. Surprised, Sam looked up and into his eyes.
“ Yesterday, you said something about not wanting to stay around in the mornings in case we had time to think about regrets,” Jack murmured. “ If I do die, I will have some regrets.”
“ Oh?” She met his gaze, her curiosity irked. “ What kind of regrets?”
“ I regret ever letting you be taken from us in the first place on P6Y331. I regret not being there to stop that creep from kidnapping you and taking you to Belethia. I regret not finding you sooner, before you got too attached to the people here, before you started to think of Velenthia as your home.” He took a deep breath and looked anywhere but at her. “ I regret not
saying things I should have said a long time ago.”
“ What kind of things?” Sam stared at him, her heart pounding in her chest as he slowly brought his eyes to rest back on her face. “ Colonel?”
“ Sam.” He moved one of his hands back to her face as he gazed deeply into her eyes. “ One of my biggest regrets would be not telling you how I feel about you, and not doing anything about it.” His other hand moved to the other side of her face, telling himself this was it, it was now or never. “ It’s too late to do anything about it. I can’t.. *show*.. you I feel.. But I can still tell you.”
They were so caught up in their conversation that they were obvious to the fact they were no longer alone. In the shadows, Lord Jalen hid, listening to every word intently. On the steps leading down into the cell area, the King stood, leaning heavily on Nicholi for support, both of them listening to what was being confessed.
“ Colonel.. Jack..” Sam pleaded with her eyes. “ Don’t do this.. Don’t act like this is it.. This *can’t* be it.. I can’t..”
“ This is my last chance, Sam,” he murmured, his eyes sad and serious. “ I honestly can’t see us getting out of this one. SG-1’s luck has to run out eventually, this is it. But I’ll be damned if I let some dead guy take this away from me.” Swallowing his nerves, he took a deep breath. “ I told you before than I care about you.. A lot more than I’m supposed to.. I care about you a lot more than that, Sam. Somewhere along the line, even though you are a scientist.. I started to.. Damn it.”
“ Just say it, Jack,” she urged him softly, not entirely sure she was ready to hear what he had to say. “ Please.”
“ I love you, Samantha Carter.” He told her quietly, his voice more serious than she had ever heard it to be. Wiping her tears away with his thumbs, he continued, telling himself he’d started so he might as well finish. “ It doesn’t matter whether you’re being the Major or the Doctor or just the woman.. I love all of you.”
“ I love you, too,” she admitted, giving up in her battle to stop her tears. “ I can’t let you die, Colonel. Not now, not ever.”
“ There’s nothing you can do.” He took a deep breath and withdrew one of his hands, unable to pull back the other as she held on to it. “ Like you told me yesterday.. It’s time to let go and move on with our lives. You’ll be moving on with yours on Earth.. I’ll probably end up somewhere *really* hot.”
Smiling, Sam rolled her eyes. “ You won’t end up somewhere really hot. You’re not going to be anywhere but home. I just need to think of something. And fast. I don’t think we’ve got much time left and I don’t think I can count on the guys to help me since they’re confined to their rooms.”
“ Samantha.” The King made his presence known and Sam stepped away from Jack guiltily. He nodded to Jack in acknowledgment. “ I’m sorry to have our alliance end in this way, Colonel. These developments will mean there is no trade, of course.”
“ Of course,” Jack agreed sardonically.
“ Samantha, we must be going now.” The King stared at her expectantly. “ I will not pretend I approved of your marriage to my son nor will I pretend I approved of his behaviour in general. But he was still my son and no matter how much this man means to you, I cannot spare his life.”
“ She isn’t expecting you to,” Jack spoke up from behind her before she had the chance. “ But the least you could do is let her go back to Earth to tell my family the news.”
The King frowned. “ I cannot allow that, Colonel. If I did, she would never return.”
“ That was the plan,” Jack muttered under his breath.
“ Samantha, we have to go.” The King ordered her sternly. “ Say goodbye to Colonel O’Neill. There is nothing more you can do for him.”
Turning back to face him, Sam leaned her forehead against the bars as Jack did the same thing, reaching for each other’s hands as their breath intermingled. “ Jack, I..”
“ I know,” Jack murmured reassuringly. “ I know.” He grasped her face with his hands and moved closer. Getting as close as they could get, their eyes slid shut as their lips brushed together between the bars, the first and last kiss they had shared without the involvement of alien viruses, alternate realities and time loops. It was short but tender, awkward but made memorable by the taste of tears. “ Now you have to go. When they’re going to.. Close your eyes. I don’t want you seeing that.” He held onto her hand as she turned to leave. “ Promise me, Sam,” he said in a low voice only she could hear. “ Promise you’ll go home.”
“ I promise,” Sam murmured, forcing a reassuring smile as she stepped away out of arms reach, only to be swept away from him by the King. She held his gaze for as long as she could, looking back over her shoulder, their eyes locked as they said their silent goodbyes.
~*~
Almost every citizen of Velenthia was assembled around the gallows. Jack swallowed nervously as he knelt in the back of the cart, his head lowered as he struggled to loosen the ties that bound his hands behind his back.
He could hear their whispers but couldn’t make out their words. He could see the many expressions scattered throughout the sea of faces he passed. Some were disbelieving, some were angry. Some were sad, some were sympathetic. He knew he wouldn’t be able to find the faces of his friends, knowing they were confined to their rooms in the palace at the other end of the
city, knowing they wouldn’t be able to help rescue him, not this time.
He did search, however, for the one face in the crowd he knew would be there. The one person he knew without a doubt believed him. He didn’t see her until the cart slowed to a halt and two sturdy guards roughly hauled him out of it. He was being led up to the gallows when he caught a glimpse of her, sitting beside the King, dressed all in black, the colour making her appear too pale and too thin. Her eyes met his and he saw a tear run down her cheek, her eyes red from crying.
‘I love you,’ he mouthed as he took the last step, onto the wooden block that would soon be kicked from underneath his feet. The weak smile she gave him in response told him all he needed to know: his feelings were returned.
He took a deep breath as he heard the drum roll, closing his eyes as he waited for it to come, knowing without looking that Sam had done the same thing, following his orders right down to the last.
“ Stop!” His eyes snapped open to find Lord Jalen standing on the steps, bowing to the King. “ I beg of you, your Majesty. Please do no let this man suffer for the work of another.”
“ What are you talking about, Lord Jalen?” The King was weary, exhausted by the chain of events that had started with SG-1 gating through to Velenthia. “ Do you have evidence this man is innocent?”
“ No, my Grace,” Lord Jalen bowed again. He straightened and stared accusingly at Sam. “ But it is my belief that Colonel O’Neill, or whomever the guilty party is, can not be held accountable for his actions. I believe the murderer was under the influence of witchcraft.” His statement was met by startled gasps and exclamations of surprise, much to his pleasure. His eyes landed on Sam’s face and he smirked. “ My King, great people of Velenthia, there is a witch amongst us. A witch who has used her charm, beauty and power to fool us all. I believe she has bewitched everyone, including you, Your Highness.”
“ And who,” the King asked with narrowed eyes. “ Do you believe to be this witch?”
Attempting to look sympathetic, Jalen wiped the smirk from his face. “ It pains me to accuse her, your Highness, as I know how fond you are. I believe Samantha, the courtesan you have protected and welcomed into your family, has been deceiving you. She has bewitched us all. I have found myself on the receiving end of her charms, so enchanted by her that I resorted to
violence. The witch is Samantha Carter, my King. She is responsible for the death of your son, her own husband, and therefore Colonel O’Neill does not deserve to suffer.”
Paranoia, hysteria and outrage were rife. The people of Velenthia all spoke and shouted at once. Fearing for Sam’s safety, the King had her escorted back to the palace, telling Lords Akima and Davin to arrange for Lord Jalen to follow them to the palace, needing to learn all he could about Jalen’s accusations and the reasons behind them.
Jack was taken back to the cart, led by the guards who were obviously as confused as he was. After another bumpy cart ride, he found himself back in the cold cell he thought he’d never see again. Sighing heavily, he sat on the bench once they untied his hands and closed his eyes, resting his head against the wall.
He hoped Jalen’s accusations would be discovered to be unfounded.
The last thing he wanted was for Sam to die a pointless death as well.
~*~
A small collection of Velenthians were escorted to the meeting hall in the palace, including Evelyn and the Kavise family. The King and his Lords and advisors were already there, as was Lord Jalen. Sam was conspicuously absent, the King having decided it would be safer for her to stay in her room under the watchful eye of Karalynn until the city had reached an agreement.
“ People of Velenthia,” the King started, standing with Lord Davin’s help. “ We are here because Lord Jalen has made a serious accusation against my son’s widow, Samantha. It is our hope that by the end of this meeting, you, the people, will have helped us decide whether Lord Jalen should be believed or accused of duplicity.” The King gave Jalen a short nod. “ Lord
Jalen, if you would please stand and state your case.”
“ Certainly, your Majesty.” Lord Jalen got to his feet and stood before them all, standing in the centre of the crowded room. “ How many people in his room have encountered Samantha? How many of us remember her arrival to our world?” There were murmurs and nods so he continued. “ I put it to you that she is a witch. This.. accusation.. was not easy for me to make. I know
Samantha has won over a great many of you with her sweet nature and innocent beauty. I stand here before you, as a fellow Velenthian, and ask you to think back to when you first met her.” He paused for dramatic effect. “ Samantha.. She is not one of us. We do not know where she came from or why she was sent here. All we really know is that since she arrived in our city, we have all been taken with her, myself included. Women of Velenthia, have you not noticed the way your husband’s eyes follow her every move as she walks by? Have you not seen responsible, respectable men reduced to physical fighting simply because of her presence? It is more than her beauty that drives us all to this, to act.. unlike our true selves. It is witchery.
Samantha has cast a spell over us all and we must not let her trickery continue.”
“ Do you have proof, Lord Jalen, that what you claim is true?” Lady Hillcross asked once Jalen had finished his spiel. “ I myself have spent time with Samantha. I do not wish to believe your claims.”
“ My Lady,” Lord Jalen bowed graciously. “ None of us wish to believe there is a witch in our midst but cast your mind back to the way the people of Velenthia have been behaving since she arrived. There is as air of mystery surrounding her that appeals to us all. It is this air of mystery that leads me to believe she is more than a simple woman. No one here can explain the words she uses or the attitude she has towards us. She is far more outspoken than a woman should be, her words unsuitable and offensive at times. A witch would have no cause to fear the reactions of those around her. She would have the power to control them. A normal woman would be warier about what words she spoke in public.”
“ You have not answered my question,” Lady Hillcross insisted. “ I ask you, have you any evidence to support your theory that Samantha is a witch?”
“ I have only the knowledge of my own personal infatuation with her, my Lady,” Jalen bowed his head. “ I have only witnessed the evidence in the behaviour of yourself and your fellow Lords and Ladies. I have seen it in the King, throughout her time here. She has affected him greatly and taken the place of our beloved Queen in his heart through no fault of his own. He is a victim, as much of a victim as his tragic son.”
Taking a few moments, Lord Jalen bowed his head, letting his grief at the death of Prince Taylin be witnessed by the people of Velenthia who were acting as his jury. He played on their own anger and pain at their Prince's murder, manipulating their feelings and directing their resentment at an innocent party.
“ I was close to Prince Taylin, as many of you know,” Lord Jalen stated. " He was a close, personal friend whom I loved dearly. I loved him like a brother. He was taken from us before his time in a malicious attack, an attack I believe was orchestrated by the very woman he loved and chose to spend eternity with. I believe that while Colonel O'Neill may have
murdered our Prince, he was not able to control his actions and therefore should be relieved of responsibility from them. He was acting under the guidance of a very deceptive, very strong witch with whom I am certain he was intimate with. Your Highness, you can support my claim, can't you? Colonel O'Neill and Samantha were.. very close, were they not?”
Reluctantly, the King nodded. “ I sent Samantha to tend to Colonel O'Neill. She has spent many hours in his company. I did not enquire over what occurred in that time.”
“ I would never presume you would, your Majesty.” Jalen appeared insulted at the insinuation. “ My friends,” he addressed the crowd of people standing before him, his back to the King. “ The facts have been put before you. It is now your decision between a fellow Velenthian or a woman who is a stranger to us all.”
The people conferred amongst themselves, discussing in low murmurs and whispers what they believed to be true and who they decided to back: Lord Jalen, or a woman who wasn't there to defend herself.
“ It is true the men have been acting strange since she arrived.”
“ The King has been doting on her.”
“ She is a witch! She has fooled us all!”
“ She must die for her crimes. Witches must be burnt at the stake as they were in the life-cycles of our Grandfathers!”
“ What about Colonel O'Neill? Should he die or should we let him go free?”
“ Colonel O'Neill should die with her! The witch and the murderer!”
“ Down with them both!”
“ He was acting under her powers! He cannot be held accountable for something he did not know he was doing!”
“ Colonel O'Neill should be sent from this place and returned to his home world!”
“ Should Samantha not be granted the same fate?”
“ She is a witch! Witches must die!”
“ I do not believe she is a witch!”
“ It is witchcraft, can you not see? She is controlling you and telling you to doubt Sir Jalen's claims!”
“ He is a Velenthian. He has proven his loyalty to us throughout his life-cycles.”
“ He was a dear friend of Prince Taylin..”
“ The witch is a stranger to us! We must destroy her before she can kill again!”
The outcries continued until the majority of the room were in favour of condemning Sam to death, prepared to believe she was a witch and had caused the death of the Prince. The room remained divided, however, on whether or not Jack should die at her side. There were those who believed he was an innocent, as much of a victim as the King and the Prince. There were those
who believed he was her accomplice and had known what he had been doing at the time of Prince Taylin's death.
No one suspected the real murderer. Lord Jalen was going to get away with his crime, and his revenge. The thought that he could be responsible never crossed their minds.
Watching his people come to their decision, the King felt his heart painfully break. He could not bring himself to believe Samantha was a witch, not when he had grown so close to her and learnt so much about her. He had spent many hours in her company, he had comforted her and sought comfort in return. He could not believe there was anything malevolent within her but he knew he would have no choice but to adhere to the wishes of his people.
“ You cannot sentence Samantha or Colonel O'Neill to death!” The voice came from the back of the room and the person who spoke stepped forward. Nicholi, with carefully measured movements, walked to the centre of the room and bowed to the King. He turned to face the other Velenthians, searching out Evelyn's face in the crowd. Apologising to her silently, he cleared
his throat and spoke the words that would seal his fate. The lie he hoped would protect the people who had risked so much to help him and his fiancée. “ Samantha and Colonel O'Neill are innocent. They did not kill Prince Taylin. They were not in the palace gardens that night.” He swallowed the lump in his throat and held his head high, closing his eyes as he prepared himself for the worse. “ I know they are innocent because it is I who is not. I murdered Prince Taylin because he threatened both the woman I love and the woman who was protecting her. Samantha should not suffer for her husband’s death, nor should Colonel O'Neill. It is I who deserves to die at dawn tomorrow. I murdered your beloved Prince.”
Getting to his feet, the King pointed at Nicholi. “ Seize that man and arrest him for murder! He has confessed and will be punished at dawn.”
The confused crowds looked on as Nicholi was led away, missing the scowl on Lord Jalen’s face. Evelyn watched as her fiancé was taken away, breaking down in Bernadette’s arms as she sobbed her heart out. She understood his motives and agreed that Samantha and Colonel O’Neill were innocent, but she hadn’t been prepared for him to sacrifice his life to save those of their friends.
~*~
Jack once more found himself confused as he was led out of the prison building, his feet released from their shackles once they’d reached the surface. His confusion grew when he was told he was being let go. That he was free.
Fearing the worst for Sam, he made his way into the palace, his unkempt appearance stopping even the strongest of guards from getting in his way. He stormed through the corridors, ignoring the nervous smiles he received, his mind concentrated on a single course.
He was out of breath when he reached her room, barging in without even knocking. He stood in the doorway panting as he took in the scene before him. Evelyn was sobbing in Sam's arms, Nicholi's parents were leaning heavily on one another as Bernadette cried silently, her husband holding her with a distraught expression on his face.
“ Sam?” She looked up, startled to find him there, having been distracted by Evelyn's distressed state.
“ You must tell him, Samantha,” Karalynn approached the bed and eased Evelyn into her arms, the young woman going willingly, needing someone to hold her. “ I will stay with Evelyn until you return.”
Her face was tear stained and withdrawn. Sam took his arm and led him from the room, closing the door behind him before sinking willingly into his arms. He smelt like the cell he'd been imprisoned in but she couldn't bring herself to care as she closed her eyes tightly, relishing the feel of him, knowing if things had gone differently, he would be dead.
“ Shh.” Jack was hushing her and rubbing her back before she even realised she was crying. “ Tell me what's wrong, Sam. Why was I let go? Why's Evelyn so upset? They didn't.. You're not going to take my place, are you?”
She pulled away, shaking her head as she wiped at her cheeks with her hands, making them a stark red in contrast to the paleness of the rest of her face. “ I'm not taking your place. Evelyn said they were going to accuse me of being a witch and burn me at the stake.. but.. Nicholi.. He stood up for us. He admitted to murdering Prince Taylin when he didn't. He was trying to protect us. He's going to die to save us.”
Pulling her back into his arms, Jack rested his cheek against her hair, rocking her gently. “ We won't let that happen. We'll think of something, Sam. I don't know what but we will. We're all going to leave this place. All of us. No one's being left behind this time.”
She wanted to believe him but she couldn't. She squeezed her eyes tightly shut and let him hold her, trying to convince herself that they'd come out of it okay. Major Carter would have had no problems finding the confidence to believe her Commanding Officer. Major Carter would already be searching for a solution, prepared to spend every second racking her brain for the answer they were all praying for, the answer everyone would expect her to come up with. Sam, however, couldn't find the courage to do that. She couldn't find the confidence she needed in herself nor in her team mates to pull through this time.
And that was when she realised she could go home but she wouldn't be able to easily slip into the role of Major-Doctor Carter again. She wasn't sure if she ever could. To do that, she needed confidence in herself and in her colleagues; she needed to trust both them and herself to make the decisions.
What was she supposed to do if that trust and confidence was gone?
~*~
Lord Jalen witnessed their reunion through eyes that blazed with spite. He heard Colonel O'Neill's promise that they would all return home, back to the planet from which they came and laughed inwardly.
‘You may think that, Colonel,’ he thought to himself, a wicked smile curving up his lips. ‘But you are mistaken. I will not give up. Samantha will be punished for all she has put make though. You will not take her away from me. I will not allow her to leave this place unscathed, nor will I allow Evelyn to be free.’
He followed them at a discreet distance as they made their way down the hallway from Samantha's room to Colonel O’Neill’s, listening to their conversation, misinterpreting Colonel O'Neill's attempts at lightening the atmosphere to be triumphant jokes traded by two people who were celebrating a victory.
“ You know, I never thought I'd say this to you, Colonel, but you really smell bad,” Samantha murmured, her arm wound tightly around his waist.
Chuckling, Colonel O'Neill pressed a soft kiss to her head as Lord Jalen frowned deeply. “ Well, Carter. I have to say it, you don't look so hot yourself.”
Lord Jalen stopped trailing them as a plan started to form in his mind. He could not understand why the young man, Nicholi Kavise, had jumped to the rescue of the stranger and the courtesan. He knew Nicholi was close to Evelyn, he knew of their plans to marry, but he hadn’t counted on Nicholi’s loyalty to Samantha to spread as far as it did. He had never imagined the young man would sacrifices his own life to save hers.
It was an act of human compassion Jalen could and would never understand.
Pondering the day’s events, Jalen worked out a pattern in his mind. Evelyn was Nicholi’s weakness. She was also a very close friend of Samantha’s. She was a young, pretty courtesan. One who could have easily been duped into following the ways of witchcraft.
Grinning to himself, Jalen walked in the opposite direction to Sam and Jack.
Revenge would be his, an experience he would savour. Especially as now it spread to include both of the courtesans who had caused him to suffer the humiliation a man of his position should never have been made to endure.
~*~
“ Broken windows and empty hallways,
a pale dead moon in a sky streaked with grey.
Human kindness is overflowing,
and I think it's gonna rain today.”
~ ‘I Think it’s Gonna Rain Today’, Bette Midler.
~*~
~*~
Part Fourteen
~*~
“ I won’t see your smile
And I won’t hear you laugh anymore
Every night, I won’t see you
Walk through that door.”
~ ‘Never Forget You, Mariah Carey
~*~
He knocked swiftly on the door, his patience wearing thin as he was made to wait for someone to answer his calls. Lord Jalen glanced warily around him, making sure no one had seen him enter this part of the palace. If his plan were to work, the courtesans would need to be seen to agree of their own accord.
“ Lord Jalen.” It was Veronica who answered, and curtseyed politely although she looked less than thrilled to see him. “ What can we do for you this evening? The King has cancelled all appointments in wake of Prince Taylin’s murder..”
“ I’m not here for an appointment,” Jalen told her brusquely, briskly pushing past her and into the main chamber before anyone could see him standing in the hallway. The state of dress, and undress, of the women around him didn’t disturb him as he marched to the centre of the room. “ I come to you with a proposition.” His eyes gleamed. “ And a threat.”
Veronica joined some of the courtesans on the long couch in the centre of the room, looking curious at Lord Jalen. Speaking on behalf of her fellow courtesans as she usually did, Veronica was the one to ask him what he meant. “ A proposition and a threat? How can something be both?”
“ Easily, my dear,” Jalen responded condescendingly. “ It is a proposition unless you decide to have no part in it. Then it becomes a threat, to you all.”
“ I assume this has something to do with the accusations you made against Samantha today?” Veronica continued to press his for more information, not out of responsibility for the others but out of her own desire to stay on Lord Jalen’s good side. She knew how violent he could be, and how evil.
Lord Jalen smiled wickedly. “ Ah, you have heard of them? I was not sure whether you would have been informed of them yet.”
“ We hear everything,” Veronica shrugged casually. “ We also know the charges were dropped. Nicholi Kavise confessed to murder and will be hung in place of Colonel O’Neill and Samantha.”
“ Yes.” Lord Jalen’s mouth thinned into a tight, white line of resentment. “ I know. That is why I’m here. I believe I can still reverse the charges for the Kavise boy and have Samantha burn at the stake instead.” His eyes sparkled deviously. “ The question is, how many of you wish to join her in burning at the stake?”
Standing, Veronica approached him, staring at him through suspicious eyes. “ Is that your threat, Lord Jalen?
“ It is if you do not comply with my wishes, Veronica,” Lord Jalen grinned back at her, obviously very pleased with himself.
“ Then please,” Veronica lowered her head respectfully. “ Please tell us what your wishes are. I am certain we all would like to hear them and discover what would save us from joining Samantha in suffering such a terrible fate.”
“ Do not try to sympathise with her, Veronica. It is clear to all of us that you hold nothing but contempt and fury for the woman who stole the affections of many away from you.” Lord Jalen warned her sharply, waiting until she had taken her seat before continuing with his threat. “ This morning, I had the good people of Velenthia convinced there was a witch in our midst, until Nicholi Kavise stepped in and took the blame. I have been asking myself since then why he did that. Why he would give his own life to save that of a stranger.”
Veronica sighed. “ It is obvious, Lord Jalen.” She continued when he looked at her curiously. “ Nicholi has fallen for Evelyn. Everyone knows Evelyn would have died in this line of work a long time ago if not for Samantha’s intervention. Nicholi obviously feels grateful to Samantha for freeing Evelyn from her role here in the palace and has grown loyal to her. Word has it
Evelyn will be returning to Samantha’s home world where she will be protected.”
“ I see.” Lord Jalen grinned widely. “ Then, knowing Samantha and Evelyn as you do, do you think it’s possible that Samantha could have taught Evelyn the ways of a witch? Surely you see how Evelyn has been taken under her wing? Is it not possible that Evelyn has bewitched Nicholi in the same way Samantha has bewitched everyone else?”
“ It is possible,” Veronica answered slowly, “ but Evelyn and Nicholi were together long before Samantha arrived on Velenthia.”
“ And how many people know that, Veronica? How many people who are *not* in this room were aware of the relationship between Evelyn and Nicholi before Samantha arrived?” Lord Jalen asked with a smug smile. “ The answer, I think you’ll agree, is not many. Certainly not enough to go against the word of the rest of you.”
“ Us?” Veronica’s eyes narrowed again. “ What do we have to do with this?”
“ You will be my witnesses in trial,” Lord Jalen explained arrogantly. “ I anticipate that the King will call for a trial when his two favourite courtesans are accused of being witches. You will be my witnesses and support my claims that Samantha has taught Evelyn the ways of a witch and agree with me that it is likely Evelyn has bewitched Nicholi into taking the blame for Samantha’s actions.”
“ And why would we do that?” Veronica asked guardedly. “ Why would we take your side over the side of two of our own? We may not like Samantha and Evelyn but they are courtesans. Courtesans have a sense of loyalty, too.”
Lord Jalen chuckled humourlessly. “ Yes, my dear. But you see.. If you do not agree with me.. I might have to accuse *all* courtesans of being evil. With the women of Velenthia supporting me, the men will have no choice but to agree and watch you *all* burn at the stake. That would be such a shame, don’t you think?”
“ This is your threat,” Veronica stated bluntly. “ You want us to accuse Samantha and Evelyn of being witches or we all suffer their fate?”
“ That’s the plan, my dear Veronica. It is your decision whether you wish to die out of loyalty to two women you cannot stand.. Or whether you wish to live and take back the power Samantha has stolen from you.” Lord Jalen flashed them a deceptively innocent smile. “ I will hear your decision along with the rest of the court tomorrow night when we convene. Now if you’ll excuse me, I have a trial to arrange and some witches to burn.”
The courtesans let him leave, staring at each other in silent shock. Veronica scowled darkly at Jalen’s threat; she hated the feeling of being under someone else’s control. With a haughty glare in the direction he had gone, Veronica stormed to her room, slamming he door behind her. She knelt by the window and rested her head in her hands.
‘Forgive me, Mother,’ she thought as she made her decision. ‘Forgive me for what we are about to do.’
~*~
“ Nicholi?” Evelyn and Sam stood in front of the cell the young man was being held in, both of them pale and dressed in black.
At the sound of Evelyn’s voice, Nicholi stirred and awoke from his disturbed slumber. He groaned as he stretched and stood, his back aching from a night spent on the cold floor, curled up the best he could with shackles around his ankles. “ Evelyn,” he smiled when he saw her, slowly, painfully making his way to the side of the cell where she was standing with Sam. “ Samantha.” He bowed his head. “ Thank you for coming to see me.”
“ Nicholi,” Sam sighed sadly, blinking back her tears. “ Why did you do this? You were free to go! You should have taken Evelyn and gone through the Stargate like we planned.”
“ I could not let you die, Samantha,” Nicholi told her gravely. “ You have done so much for us both, as has Colonel O’Neill, and for that I am grateful. You have kept Evelyn alive until a time we could be together, you have protected and loved her more than any mother could and I cannot thank you enough for that. The only way I could show my thanks was to stop them from
charging you with witchcraft and killing both you and the Colonel.”
“ You thanked me enough already, Nicholi,” Sam responded resolutely. “ This.. I wish you hadn’t confessed. Both Colonel O’Neill and I were prepared for what happened to us. You should have let them blame me. Then you two could have gone back to Earth.”
Nicholi smiled sorrowfully. “ It is too late for regrets, Samantha. I have done the honourable thing, the right thing. I hope you can someday understand that I have only done what I was meant to do.” He turned his attention to Evelyn, his expression softening as he took in the sight of the angry tear stains on her face and the quivering of her bottom lip. “ Evelyn, my love.”
Sam stepped a little bit to the side, giving them some privacy. Evelyn gave her a feeble smile of gratitude as she stepped up to the bars of the cell, her shaking hands clasping those of Nicholi’s through the wall that separated them. “ Nicholi..”
“ Evelyn, please forgive me,” Nicholi apologised wholeheartedly. “ I could not let Samantha die when all she has done is try to help us.”
“ I know,” Evelyn assured him as tears ran down her face. “ And I know you did not kill Prince Taylin, you were with your parents and myself at your home. The King will not hear me, I tried to protest your innocence but you confessed before too many people..”
“ I know,” Nicholi repeated her words. “ I know. It was the only way to have my confession heard and believed. Oh, Evelyn.” He kissed her knuckles gently, tears running unashamedly down his own cheeks as he did so. “ Please go with Samantha and Colonel O’Neill to their world. Please take care of our child and raise it with the knowledge that its father loved it. Even though he will never see it. Never forget that I love you or this miracle we have created.”
“ I won’t,” Evelyn sobbed. “ I’ll never forget. I love you, Nicholi. I love you so much it hurts.”
“ I love you, Evie,” Nicholi murmured, kissing her fingers. “ I always will. No matter what awaits me in the life after this one. I will never stop loving your or our child.” Composing himself, Nicholi took a step back and wiped at his face with hands made dirty from sleeping on the muddy floor. “ Samantha,” he tried to control his voice but it shook anyway. “ Please take Evelyn out of here, and do not let her witness my death.”
“ I won’t let anything happen to her, Nicholi,” Sam promised as she wiped angrily at the tear that ran down her own cheek.
“ I know you won’t,” Nicholi smiled genuinely, confident that she would do all she could to protect his fiancée. “ Please help her take care of herself and our child, and assist her in raising it. My mother would help.. but it will not be safe for Evelyn to stay here once people learn she is carrying the child of a murderer.”
Sam nodded, impressed by his maturity. “ They will both be safe on Earth, I promise, and I’ll help Evelyn in every way I can..” Her voice trailed off as she cleared her throat. “ I wish you hadn’t done this, Nicholi. Can’t you take back your confession and say I made you say it?”
“ I will not endanger you in that way, Samantha,” Nicholi responded firmly. “ I am counting on you to protect Evelyn and the child she carries.”
“ I won’t you let you down,” Sam vowed, wishing there was *something* she could do to save him from dying. She had tried talking to the King but he wouldn’t hear of it. Nicholi had confessed in front of the King, the Lords and Ladies and a large gathering of Velenthians. There was not much that could be said to save him now. She banished the negative thoughts from her head and wrapped an arm around Evelyn’s shaking shoulders. “ Come on, Evie. You need to get some rest before..”
Evelyn was glad Sam didn’t finish her sentence, a fresh rain of tears falling from her eyes as she tore her gaze away from Nicholi. She trembled violently against Sam as the older woman helped her up the stairs and out of the building, collapsing against her as soon as they got to the top and were away from Nicholi’s worried eyes. “ I can’t do this, Samantha!” Evelyn wailed. “ I can’t raise my child without its father!”
“ Shh,” Sam knelt down beside her, ignoring the glances they were receiving from the guards and rocked Evelyn in her arms. “ It’s going to be okay, Evelyn. I won’t let you do this alone. I promise.”
The young woman was inconsolable, crying bitter tears as she sunk into Sam’s embrace. Feeling her heart clench painfully at the hopelessness of it all, Sam couldn’t do anything but hold Evelyn and whisper soothing platitudes, trying to remember when the last time she felt so helpless.
~*~
“ People of Velenthia!” Lord Jalen called out above the murmurs and whispers of the crowds gathered around the gallows. “ You have been summoned here to witness and judge in court. Many of you were present yesterday when Nicholi Kavise confessed to murdering our Prince, coming to the rescue of Samantha, the woman I accused of being a witch. Today, my fellow Velenthians, I put it to you that it was a false confession!” His statement was greeted by a stunned silence. “ It is my belief that Nicholi Kavise has been bewitched into confessing for a crime he did not commit! I believe he was bewitched not by Samantha Carter, but by her apprentice, Evelyn Gremick!”
“ Lord Jalen,” the King addressed him, appearing worn and wary. “ This is the second time you have demanded an execution to be halted. Please, state your case and present to the people of Velenthia and the Lords and Ladies your evidence for believing your claims to be true. Justice will be met. My son’s true murderer will suffer at my hand. I am eager to get on with the proceedings.”
Lord Jalen bowed. “ Of course, your Excellency. But you do not wish to punish an innocent man, which is what I believe will happen if you allow Nicholi Kavise to die.” Clearing his throat, he turned to the sea of faces waiting expectantly and smiled graciously. “ Nicholi Kavise and the Kavise family have been a part of our fine city for many, many life-cycles. I do not believe that such a respected, gentle young man can be responsible for the violent, unnecessary death of our beloved Prince and much missed friend.” Gesturing to someone in the crowd, Jalen fought a grin as Veronica stepped forward. “ My Lords and Ladies; my prestigious King; good people of Velenthia. I present to you my evidence that Nicholi Kavise is innocent.”
He took a deep breath and waited for the sign from Veronica, a subtle nod, before continuing. “ Nicholi Kavise has been intimately involved with the courtesan Evelyn Gremick for many moon-cycles now. Their involvement started shortly after the arrival of Samantha to our world. Evelyn was, as many know, a quiet young woman who could not defend herself and was in danger of losing her life because she was unable to protect it. When Samantha arrived, that changed. Evelyn blossomed into a beautiful young woman, with confidence and style that mimicked Samantha’s own. I put it to you that this change in her demeanour is evidence that Evelyn was more than just protected by Samantha. I believe Evelyn was welcomed into the dark ways of witchcraft by Samantha and became an apprentice, a witch in her own right. Veronica, if you please..”
Veronica curtseyed before the Lords, Ladies and the King and turned to the crowd, taking a deep steeling breath before she began. “ I concur with lord Jalen’s accusations on behalf of all other Velenthia courtesans. We have been too afraid to speak out before now, but Lord Jalen has assured us we will be protected.” She paused so Lord Jalen could smile and nod convincingly. “ Since Samantha arrived, the rest of us have been frightened. She has a great deal of power and has been seen doing things a normal woman cannot do. She has magical powers that can transform her appearance into being the beautiful woman so many of you know. She casts spells late at night to win her the hearts and loyalty of many of the people I see standing before me now. It saddens me to have to confess Evelyn has been led astray by her wicked ways. I myself witnessed
the two of them together in the early hours of morning, concocting potions to give to their lovers to ensure their loyalty and affections. Your Highness,” Veronica turned to the King, curtseying again as a convincing tear ran down her face. “ I apologise for not coming forward sooner. Perhaps if I had, Prince Taylin would still be with us.”
“ There you have it!” Lord Jalen shouted, trying not to sound as gleeful as he felt. “ A first hand account of witchcraft! I implore you, good people of Velenthia. Do not let these witches win! Do not let them divide us and kill one of our own! One innocent life has been taken, do not let them trick us into taking another!”
He fell silent as the people conferred amongst themselves, feeling confident they would find Samantha and Evelyn guilty, especially as the two women were forbidden from attending and therefore were not being given the chance to defend themselves. He had pleaded with the King in front of the Lords and Ladies not to allow them to be there, claiming they would only use witchery if they were. Reluctantly, the King had been forced to agree and Jalen could tell as he watched the King’s distress play over his face that he was regretting it.
“ Your Majesty,” the spokesperson for the people stood and bowed courteously. “ The people of Velenthia have reached a decision.” Holding his head up high, he met the King’s anxious gaze. “ The people of Velenthia find Nicholi Kavise innocent of murder and request that he be freed and allowed to join his family. We find Samantha Carter and Evelyn Gremick guilty of the charges of witchcraft and wish they be sentenced to death by fire.”
Hanging his head, the King closed his eyes tightly, praying he had misheard, praying for some way out of having to sentence Samantha to death.
“ Your Majesty,” it was Lord Davin, his whispered tone urgent. “ The people are waiting for you to state the time of the executions. The Ladies and Lords of Velenthia concur with them that Samantha and Evelyn must die for being witches. I am sorry, my King. I wish there were some way we could prevent this. I am fond of Samantha myself.”
“ People of Velenthia,” the King stood up, his voice shaking to match the rest of his body. “ The Lords and Ladies agree with your decision and with your recommended courses of action. At midday tomorrow, Samantha Carter and Evelyn Gremick, found to be witches by this noble people, will be sentenced to death and burned at the stake for their crimes.”
He didn’t hear the deafening cheers around him, he didn’t see the look of triumphant that graced Lord Jalen’s face. The King slumped back down in his chair, burying his face in his hands as he wept silent tears, grieving for the lost life of his son and for the life he would be taking from the woman he loved as dearly as a daughter.
~*~
Sam and Evelyn were sitting in her room, holding onto each other when the guards came. With a sinking heart, Sam knew why they were there the moment she was roughly taken into their custody.
“ Samantha?” Evelyn cried out as she was dragged away from her friend and mother figure. Hysterical panic flared in her eyes as she clawed at the arms tightening around her. “ Samantha!”
“ It’ll be okay, Evelyn,” Sam called out softly as she went willingly with the guard who bound her hands tightly behind her back. “ Stay calm and it’ll be okay.”
The young woman was beyond any capability for rational thinking. Her shouts and screams were heard throughout the palace, heard by Jack and SG-1 who were on their way to Sam’s room after finally being released from their rooms. Fearing for their team mate and the young woman they had all risked so much for, they raced through the maze of hallways until they reached Sam’s room, startled to find the door was open and there was no one inside.
“ Sam?” Jack called out as he searched the room, racing into the bathroom to see if she was there. “ Carter?”
“ You are too late,” Karalynn spoke up from the doorway, her expression grim.
“ What do you mean we’re too late?” Janet took a step towards the old woman, her eyes wide with obvious fear for her friend. “ Where are Sam and Evelyn?”
“ They have been charged with witchcraft,” Karalynn told them regretfully. “ The King has ordered that they be burnt at the stake tomorrow at midday. There is nothing more you can do for them.”
Daniel slumped down on Sam’s bed, remembering a time when Teal’c had been the one accused of witchcraft. If it weren’t for his symbiote, they would have lost him that time. Daniel knew about the period of witch trials in Europe and America and he knew all about the punishments and the paranoia surrounding them. Raising his head, he felt his chest tighten painfully. “ There’s nothing we can do, Jack,” he murmured as Janet joined him on the bed, hanging her head in her hands. “ Velenthia has the same strict policy for witches as they had on Earth in the 15th and 16th centuries. Once someone is condemned a witch, they will be killed. There’s nothing we can do to stop it.”
“ No.” Jack shook his head, his hand gestures frantic as he ran a hand through his hair. “ There has to be *something* we can do. We didn’t come this far just to lose her. No, there’s something we can do. We can’t let her die, we can’t..”
“ I believe Daniel Jackson is correct, O’Neill.” Teal’c placed a hand on Jack’s shoulder, his own grief evident in his deep brown eyes. “ I have studied the period of your history in great detail since returning from the medieval world in which I was drowned. There is nothing we can do for Major Carter but hope her death is painless.”
“ She’s going to burn to death, Teal’c!” Jack shouted angrily. “ How can that be painless?”
“ Then we must pray for her,” Teal’c responded unflappably. “ We must pray she gives into death easily and does not fight it.”
“ That’s all we can do?” Jack asked disbelievingly. “ You’re all ready to give up?”
Daniel looked helpless. “ What more can we do, Jack? Short of getting ourselves killed with her. She wouldn’t want that. She’d want us to go back to Earth while we still can.”
Shaking his head, Jack shook off Teal’c’s hand and stormed away from them. “ You might be ready to accept that but I’m not.”
“ Should we not go after him, Daniel-Jackson?” Teal’c asked a few minutes later when no one had made a move to follow their leader. “ O’Neill will need us now.”
Shaking his head, Daniel put his arm around Janet’s shoulders, drawing her nearer as she began to cry. “ Jack needs some time alone, Teal’c. He has to realise he can’t save her. Not this time.”
Alone, in the gardens of the palace, Jack O’Neill came to the same conclusion and broke down because of it, his distressed state witnessed by no one.
~*~
Meanwhile, in the King’s chambers, the King paced the floor as Lords Davin and Akima looked on in sympathy.
“ There must be something we can do,” the King thought aloud. “ I cannot let Samantha die. I vowed to protect her with my own life if necessary. I cannot let her die tomorrow.”
“ My King,” Lord Davin cut in. “ There is nothing you can do without losing the respect of your people. Freeing Samantha will be seen as an act of weakness, you will be seen to be under the control of her powers and the people of Velenthia will not accept that as a quality in their leader.”
“ Lord Davin is right, your Majesty,” Lord Akima chimed in. “ You will be relieved of your duties of King if you do anything to help her. She must fend for herself and you must do your royal duty and grant the wishes of your subjects.”
“ Just because I have to do it doesn’t mean I want to,” he King snapped, speaking mainly to himself. “ Samantha will understand. She knows how much I value my position.” Sighing heavily, he changed direction and started pacing across the other side of the room. “ But if I let them die, how can I forgive myself? I vowed I would never put my duties before another woman I loved. And Evelyn is only a child, I cannot let her die in such a way.”
Lord Davin exchanged a concerned glance with Lord Akima. “ Your Majesty, please. Do not worry so over this matter. You are still recovering from an illness we have not been able to identify. Please do not over-exert yourself in this way.”
“ I must see Samantha!” The King declared, acting as though he hadn’t heard Lord Davin’s plea. Grabbing his robe, the King tightened it around him and waved away their protests before they could voice them. “ I must explain to her why I have no choice. I must have her forgiveness before tomorrow!”
The two Lords, his most valued of advisors, could only watch as he left before they could comment. Helping himself to one of the chairs, Lord Davin leaned his head back and closed his eyes.
“ What is Velenthia coming to, old friend?”
“ I do not know,” Lord Akima agreed sadly, sitting in the other chair. “ But I hope it will return to normal after tomorrows executions.”
~*~
The two women huddled together for warmth as an icy breeze swirled around their cell. Evelyn had long since stopped crying, but the occasional sniff still escaped her. Sam sat stoically, her arms around the younger woman as she closed her eyes and dreamed of being in a better place, of being in a world where everything went to plan and no one suffered from unfair deaths.
Her musings were cut short when she heard footsteps on the stairs. Gently easing Evelyn from her arms, Sam lay the young woman down on the mouldy bench, using the shawl she had discarded as a pillow as she moved to stand by the bars, her face blank and expressionless, ready to face whomever was coming to see them.
“ Samantha!” The King greeted her miserably. “ My dear, are you being well treated?”
“ As well as any other prisoner,” Sam murmured in reply, curious and surprised by his arrival. “ What are you doing here? Isn’t it forbidden for us to have guests before the day of our deaths?”
“ I am the King,” he responded with a small smile of pride. “ I came to make sure you were well and to ask for your forgiveness. I have no choice, Samantha. I must do what my people want me to do.”
“ You never have any choices,” Sam retorted bitterly, crossing her arms over her chest, trying to tell herself to ignore the hurt in his face at her tone. “ You never do what you want to do because you’re a coward and can’t bear the thought of one of your subjects feeling something other than affection for you.”
The King was taken back. “ Samantha! My dear, you understand why I must do what I do! You know how the system works! If I do not adhere to their wishes, I will be dethroned and left to starve on the streets!”
“ How many other people have died to save you from disgrace, your Majesty,” she added with contempt, casting a glance over her shoulder at Evelyn. “ How many other children are you responsible for killing?”
Now seeming appalled, the King tried to appeal to her. “ That is not fair! You know I wish no harm on anyone! If I could save every person who needed saving, I would!”
“ Then put your money where your mouth is and do it!” Sam replied quietly, knowing the Earth phrase would be lost on him. “ You couldn’t let me go before and you can’t now but Evelyn still has a chance. Take her with you, to Colonel O’Neill. Tell him to take her back to Earth tonight before anyone realises she’s missing. I’ll take full responsibility for it in the morning when the guards find her gone. I’ll say I put a spell on them. That way no one will blame you.”
“ You’re asking me to go against the wishes of my people!” The King gasped.
“ But no one will know,” Sam responded in a firm voice. “ For once in your life, stand up for something you believe it. Let Evelyn out of here. I’ll stay. I don’t care. I’ll die tomorrow for the both of us but please. I’m asking you. Take Evelyn out of here tonight and let her leave. For the sake of her child.”
“ Evelyn is with child?” The King’s eyes widened in surprise. “ Why did you not tell me this sooner?”
“ Would it have made a difference?” Sam shot back rapidly.
“ No,” he admitted, shaking his head. Glancing nervously around him, he sighed and relented, reaching for the keys he wore on the belt around his waist. “ If anyone learns of this, Samantha, I will be dying with you tomorrow.”
“ No one will know,” Sam promised him sincerely. She walked over to Evelyn and woke the young woman up, smiling enthusiastically. “ Evie, wake up. The King is here. He’s going to take you to Colonel O’Neill and you’re going to leave tonight.”
Evelyn sat up and rubbed at her eyes as the King entered the cell. He handed Sam the keys and she quickly started to undo the shackles around Evelyn’s ankles. “ What about you?” Evelyn asked cagily. “ Do you go, too?”
“ No.” Sam helped Evelyn stand once she was free from the shackles and pulled her into a tight hug. “ I stay. There’s no time for arguments and no time for dramatics. Go with the King. Now,” she added in a voice that silenced Evelyn’s arguments.
“ Be well, Samantha,” Evelyn murmured, hugging her hard. She released her when the King tapped on her shoulder, glancing nervously around the room.
“ Go.” Sam ordered them both. “ And thank you, your Majesty.”
The King’s only response was a nod as he ushered Evelyn hurriedly up the steps once he’d locked the door to the cell behind them. Sam sat down on the bench once more and closed her eyes, dreaming of a world that used to be home, praying Evelyn and Nicholi would be happy there, hoping her friends could find peace.
~*~
Ten minutes later, five figures stole through the Velenthian night, silently cutting through the city and travelling through the forest, all of them grieving for the friend they had left behind. They made it to the Stargate without being seen, and were all relieved to find Nicholi standing there with his parents, waiting for them, just as Karalynn had promised they would be.
“ Nicholi!” Evelyn left the comfort of Janet’s side and raced into the arms of her fiancé, holding onto him for all she was worth. “ The King let me go,” she sobbed against his chest. “ Samantha convinced him he could do it without anyone knowing. She’s going to take the blame in the morning. They’re going to kill her, Nicholi.”
“ I know, Evie,” Nicholi murmured into her hair, revelling in the sensation of having her so close, having physical proof that they were both alive and well, thanks to the woman sitting the cold, dark cell awaiting her death. “ Karalynn told us,” he explained. “ It is what Samantha wants.”
The engaged couple bid their farewells to Nicholi’s parents, knowing it would be the last time they saw either of them as they would be unable to ever return to Velenthia once they had left it behind. Daniel dialled up the Stargate with Janet at his side, their faces sad and stained with tears as they tried not to think of Sam and how they were losing her again. Teal’c stood as stoically as ever, his eyes closed as he said a final prayer to the whatever Gods or Goddesses who protected Velenthia to make Sam’s death as quick as it was honourable, asking them to see the sacrifice for what it was: the gift of life to two young lovers and their unborn child. Jack numbly watched the scene play out before him, the whole situation seeming surreal. He couldn’t bring himself to believe and accept what was happening. He was breaking the promises he had made, to himself and to his friends, and there was not one single thing he could do about it.
Bernadette and Torin Kavise left as the Stargate activated, hurrying to their home so no one could accuse them of being present when the travellers departed with their son. Daniel and Janet led Evelyn and Nicholi up to the Event Horizon after sending through the Iris’s code with the GDO. Holding onto each other and their new friends, Evelyn and Nicholi held their breaths as they stepped through the blue puddle into their new home.
“ O’Neill?” Teal’c paused before following them, concerned that Jack hadn’t moved. “ Are you not joining us?”
“ I’m coming,” Jack murmured. “ I was just.. saying goodbye.” Teal’c nodded and stepped through the Stargate, leaving Jack with the impression he would be standing on the other side, waiting until he followed. Climbing the steps, Jack stood inches away from the fluctuating water-like surface and turned back to look up at the stars in the sky. “ I’m not giving up on you, Sam,” he whispered. “ Not when we’re this close.”
With no idea how he was going to keep his promise, but certain that he would, Jack stepped through the Event Horizon, letting the dizzying wormhole take him and his promises home.
~*~
“ So I ran like the wind to the water
Please don't leave me again I cried
And I threw bitter tears at the ocean
But all that came back was the tide.”
~ ‘ I Will Not Forget You’, Sarah McLachlan.
~*~
~*~
Part Fifteen
~*~
“And I'll remember the strength that you gave me
Now that I'm standing on my own
I'll remember the way that you saved me
I'll remember.”
~ ‘I’ll Remember’, Madonna.
~*~
Finding acceptance wasn’t as difficult as she’d thought it would be. Sitting alone in her cell, Sam rested her head against the wall, closing her eyes. By now, she was certain Evelyn would be safe. She was sure Jack had kept his promise and had taken both Evelyn and Nicholi through the Stargate with him and the others. She was relatively confident they would be safe now, that
something good would come out of this whole situation.
It was strange. Sam had said she couldn’t leave Velenthia because of her obligations. At the time she’d said that, she’d had no idea that she would be obliged to die.
She had convinced herself it was worth it. That it was better to lose one life rather than two. She had lived through more than most, experienced things others only dreamed about, seen things that weren’t supposed to exist. Evelyn and Nicholi where young and, in comparison to herself, innocent and naïve. They had the rest of their lives to lead and were expecting their first
child, another innocent life who deserved to be spared.
Accepting what was going to happen was made easier but the knowledge it was happening for a reason, that something positive would be gained through something negative. Throughout it all, something would be achieved.
The guards arrived a few minutes later with her last meal. A bowl of thick liquid that was supposed to be soup. She lifted the spoon tentatively to her mouth, tasting it with the tip of her tongue, dropping the spoon back in the bowl as she did so. It was cold and tasteless and the mere thought of putting a spoonful of it in her mouth made her stomach churn. Calmly, she handed the bowl back to one of the guards and watched as they left.
Time was running out for her, but she wasn't panicking like she'd expected to.
A strange feeling of calmness enveloped her, wrapping her securely in its warm embrace as she sat back down. This wasn't how she'd expected to die. When she'd thought about her own death, she'd imagined it being along side her team mates, fighting in some big battle with the Goa'uld, a soldiers death. A hero’s death. Once she had come to Velenthia, she had imagined herself dying peacefully in her sleep. The thought of dying amidst fierce flames had never crossed her mind, although that was apparently what fate had in store for her.
Shortly after leaving with her untouched meal, the guards returned. One of them stood by the doorway to the cell, watching her every move like a hawk. The other nervously approached her, surprised when she complied so easily, and bound her hands tightly behind her back.
Holding her head up high, Sam went willingly with them. She took each step steadily, refusing to give in under the pressure of the accusing glares she received from the people she passed. She stepped into the cart without any help and knelt before the guards could roughly push her to her knees. Her eyes remained open for the journey to the gallows, taking in everything that
was going on around her, bravely accepting that this was what was meant to be.
The faces of the people gathered blurred and ran into one another. Sam took no notice of their whispers and chants to 'kill the witch' and 'burn her'. She took deep, even breaths and let them out slowly. She unfalteringly eased herself out of the cart and started walking without guidance to the place she would be burned.
Standing with her back to the post of wood, Sam stared out at the people watching, oblivious to the sadness and the excitement in the air. Oblivious to the fear and the anticipation. She held out her arms and allowed them to string her up. She held her head high and met the eyes of each and every person staring at her.
“ Samantha Carter, you are convinced of being a witch,” the voice boomed from behind her. She didn't need to twist her head and see who it was. She recognised it as Lord Jalen. “ Your companion Evelyn Gremick was missing from your cell when the guards arrived this morning. You are charged with aiding her escape through the use of magic. How do you plead?”
Her eyes searched and found the faces of Bernadette and Torin. They nodded subtlety in answer to her unasked question and smiled thankfully, bravely trying to stop their tears. “ I plead guilty,” Sam spoke boldly, her voice loud enough to carry over the din of the gathered people. “ I helped Evelyn escape using magic. Do with me what you will but you shall never find her.”
“ Very well.” Lord Jalen sounded a little confused at her confession but he wasn't about to let it stop him. He had the honour of starting the fire since he had been the one to bring her to justice. He was going to make her burn and watch with interest as she writhed around in pain against the post and binds holding her place as the fire devoured her skin.
His hands shook with the excitement of it all.
“ Be prepared, witch,” he murmured into her ear as he approached the stand, kicking some extra dry twigs into place at her feet. “ This is going to hurt.”
“ I'm not afraid,” Sam responded courageously, looking straight ahead. “ I'm not afraid,” she repeated quietly to herself.
Chuckling, Lord Jalen took the flaming torch one of the guards offered him. “ You should be, Samantha. You should be.” He raised his voice to be heard by the Velenthians. “ My friends, I give to you the witch! May she suffer for all eternity for all the misfortune she has wrought on our home.” Without remorse, Lord Jalen lowered the torch to the leaves and twigs at her feet, letting it drop from his hand as the first leaves caught fire. Stepping back until he was at a safe distance away from her, he folded his arms over his chest and watched as satisfaction bubbled up inside him.
The fire spread quickly, devouring the leaves and twigs that the servants of the palace had gathered. The crowd were divided as they watched. Some chanted and cheered, some were silent. Some, those who had befriended her, began to weep and diverted their gaze from her. The flames rose and grew more and more intense, crackling and leaping out at her, the bright oranges and reds blurring before her as sweat broke out all over her skin.
“ I am not afraid,” she mumbled to herself. “ I am not afraid.”
She thought of Evelyn and Nicholi, and of the child they would be raising together. She thought of the joyous times they would be facing as well as the distraught moments. She thought of them adjusting to their new life in their new home and the feeling of heat crawling on her skin faded a little more as she felt pride well up inside her. She had helped make that possible, she had helped make their dreams come true.
“ I am not afraid.”
She thought of her friends and family on Earth. Of her nephew and niece whom she wouldn't get to see grow up. Of her brother and his wife as they experienced their children growing up and learning to stand on their own. Her brother, the same man who had tormented her as a child, who had become a friend as they'd grown up together.
“ I am not afraid.”
Her father and General Hammond, her second father. Two men who protected her and cared for her. Two men she cared for and could rely on. Her relationship with her father had improved over the years, almost everything about it that had been damaged throughout her youth had been repaired. General Hammond had become her father when General Jacob Carter wasn't around. She had always known she could go to him, despite their professional relationship with him, whenever she had a
problem.
“ I am not afraid.”
She thought of Cassandra and Janet, and knew without a doubt they would become family to Nicholi and Evelyn. She was proud of Cassandra for adjusting to Earth so well and knew the young girl she'd help to bring to Earth would grow up to be a beautiful, intelligent, warm and loving young woman. Janet, her closest female friend in a long time. The woman who was like a
sister to her. They had been through so much together; adopting an alien child, becoming host to an alien entity more than once, near-death experiences and alien viruses.. In all of that, they'd still found time to talk about the other side of life. To watch chick flicks and feast on ice cream and wine. She was thankful for that.
“ I am not afraid.”
She thought of her team mates, her second family. The family she was closer to than any of her blood relatives. Daniel, the man who was for all purposes her brother; she could go to him with any problem and he'd spent however long it took trying to help her find a solution or trying to cheer her up - whichever came first. Teal'c, a wise man who would die to protect her and who
would never turn her away if she just needed to talk. Jack. Colonel O'Neill. Her CO, her friend. The cocky and sarcastic soldier who had wormed his way into her heart no matter how many times she told herself it was wrong. He would die for her, he would live for her. He would, as she had recently learned, care for her no matter what. Maybe even love her, and that was more than anyone could ask.
“ I.. am.. not.. afraid.”
Flames licked at her skin and she closed her eyes for the first time, shutting out the pain as she welcomed the memories that flooded her mind. The first time she'd met them all, the first time Daniel and Jack had argued over artefacts and rocks, the first time Teal'c had laughed at his own Jaffa joke, the first time she seen Janet get drunk, the first time Cassandra had experienced chocolate.
The smell of singed flesh invaded her senses and her breathing quickened. She could feel the flames climbing higher, her clothes catching fire. ‘I am not afraid,’ she thought to herself as she gritted her teeth together, her hands clenching into fists as she squeezed her eyes as tightly closed as she could. The ropes bit into her skin as she shifted uncomfortably. Heat rose up her legs and stung her flesh, her feet blistering as she bit back a scream.. Her life flashed before her eyes in a blinding blaze of pure white light.
Was this heaven or some kind of after-life? The heat was gone. The pain was gone. She was no longer standing but lying. The crackling of the flames had been replaced by complete silence.
Almost.
“ Are you sure she’s going to be okay, Thor?”
Colonel O’Neill? Since when was he dead?
“ Her burns were severe, Colonel O’Neill,” Thor answered softly. “ I have done the best we can do. Major Carter will be fine.”
“ Jack?” Sam tried to sit up but found she couldn’t get her body to comply. Panic began to sink in. “ Colonel?”
He was at her side in an instant. “ Hey, Carter.” Leaning over her, he tenderly brushed a strand of hair from her face. “ You won’t be able to move for a while till the effect wears off. Thor said that’s normal.”
“ Normal for what?” She arched an eyebrow, wondering what had happened to paralyse her. “ What’s going on?”
“ You had some pretty bad burns,” he answered softly. “ Thor did a.. medical-whammy thing on you to heal them.”
“ What am I doing here?” She asked quietly, glancing around at the familiar surroundings of Thor’s Asgard vessel. “ What happened?”
Leaning closer, he dropped a gentle kiss against her forehead. “ I told you I wasn’t going to give up on you, Sam.” He pulled away. “ I couldn’t lose you again.” She rewarded his honesty with a soft smile, their gazes intertwined. Clearing his throat when the moment got too serious, Jack sat himself down in the chair Thor had put at her bedside, noticing the little grey alien had disappeared. “ You’ve got a few hours to recover from the effects of whatever it was Thor did.”
“ Why only a few hours?” Sam murmured, unable to stifle a small yawn. “ Sorry.”
“ Don’t worry about it.” Jack reached for her hand and entwined their fingers together. “ I talked Thor into hanging around in Velenthia’s orbit till evening. When you’re strong enough, he’s going to beam us both down so you can say goodbye to the King. Thor said he’d get a lock on some of the things from your room and get them back for you, too.”
“ That’s nice of him,” Sam yawned again. A frown of confusion creased her brow. “ I don’t get how you got Thor involved.. What did you do?”
“ It was a stroke of luck really,” he explained with a bashful grin. “ We were kind of desperate so Danny and me tried that communication thing Thor gave us when Earth was home to Larry, Curly and Mo. Thor was in the neighbourhood and came down to say ‘hi’. And that was it.”
“ Lucky,” Sam mumbled, half on her way to falling in a deep, healing sleep.
“ Lucky.” Jack echoed as he watched her fall asleep. He had never been more grateful to the little grey Asgard for showing up when he had. His timing usually left a lot to be desired – interrupting important speeches, invitations people were *just* about to accept.. – but this time it was perfect. A little on the late side, but it was okay. It had turned out okay. Jack dreaded to think what would have happened had they been a few minutes later. He had seen the burns Sam had suffered and could easily imagine that if they’d been just a few minutes later.. Not even all the Asgard technology in the universe could have saved her.
Shuddering, Jack leaned back in the uncomfortable chair and closed his eyes. He hadn’t slept in what felt like years. With Sam’s hand safely encased in his own, he allowed himself to relax, content in the knowledge he had managed to keep his promises, with a little help.
~*~
As night fell on Velenthia, Thor transported Sam and Jack to the hallway outside the King’s chambers. Quietly, Sam opened the door a crack and peered inside, listening to see if she could hear more than one voice. When she heard nothing, she led Jack inside, swiftly making her way to the King’s chair.
“ Your Majesty?” She called out softly, her eyes fixed on the top of the head she could see over the chair.
The King turned instantly on hearing her voice, his eyes growing wide as he paled. He clutched a hand to his chest and gasped. “ Samantha?” He took in her appearance, recognising her face and her shy smile, unable to stop a frown when he saw she was back in the uniform he had ordered her out of when she’d first arrived. “ Is it really you?”
“ Yes, it’s me,” she took a small step forward, smiling gently. “ I haven’t got long. I’m just here to say goodbye.”
Nodding, the King gestured that she take the other chair. Jack stood behind her protectively. “ I am relieved you are well, Samantha. Your disappearance caused a lot of confusion.”
“ Sorry about that,” Jack cut in with a grin. “ That was my fault. Kinda.”
“ Then I am thankful to you also, Colonel,” the King glanced briefly at him. “ For doing something I could not and saving her life.” He reached out and took Sam’s hand. “ How can you ever forgive me, Samantha?”
“ You did what you had to do,” Sam shrugged casually. “ That’s all any of us can do. Besides,” she squeezed his hand. “ You got Evelyn out of there, and if you hadn’t, SG-1 wouldn’t have returned home and Colonel O’Neill would have been here instead of asking a friend for a favour.”
“ Sam,” Jack murmured from behind her as his watch beeped. “ We’ve only got a few more minutes.”
Sam glanced down at her own watch and stood with a sigh. “ Thank you,” she said earnestly to the King. “ For everything. I don’t know what I would have done without you to take care of me.”
“ It was a pleasure.” The King rose and embraced her. “ Thank you for being yourself, Samantha. It has been a joy to know you.” He let her go and reached behind him, taking hold of a small leather pouch. With a sad smile, he took her hand and placed the pouch on her palm, closing her fingers around it and raising her hand to his lips to kiss it. “ I want you to have this. Please, do not open it yet. Save it until you are gone. It will remind you of me. Look at it and think of the pleasant times you spent here.”
“ Okay.” She reached out to hug him again, a tear sliding down her cheek. “ I’ll miss you.”
“ As I will you.”
Jack’s watch beeped again so she stepped away from the King and moved to Jack’s side. Smiling through her tears, she waved at the King as they were engulfed in a wave of bright light. Seconds later, the place where they had stood was empty and the King was left alone to grieve for another loved one he’d lost.
~*~
Back aboard Thor’s ship, they were slowly moved out of Velenthia’s orbit, heading for home. Sam stood at one of the view windows, watching the planet get smaller and smaller as she fingered the leather pouch the King had given her. Taking a deep breath as she said goodbye to another planet that had become home, she untied the string at the top of the bag and emptied the contents onto her palm.
“ Oh God,” Sam gasped as she turned the gold locket over in her hand. Closing her eyes, she tightened her fingers around it and held it close to her heart.
“ Carter?” Jack came up behind her, putting a hesitant hand on her shoulder. “ You okay?”
“ I’m fine, thanks.” Her eyes opened and she showed him what was in her hand. “ It belonged to his wife,” she explained as he gazed down at the gold locket. “ There’s a poem engraved on the back. It was read at their wedding. He gave this to her as a wedding present.”
“ And now he’s given it to you,” he finished, taking the locket gently from her hand. She looked confused until he undid the clasp of the chain and it dawned on her what he was doing. Holding her hair of his way, she stood statue-still until he fastened the clasp and let go of the locket. Turning her gently to face him, he smiled. “ It looks good on you.”
“ Thanks,” she smiled shyly and let her hair fall around her shoulders. After a few uncomfortable minutes of silence, she returned her attention to the rapidly shrinking planet. “ I’m going to miss it, no matter how bad things got over the last few days.”
“ That’s understandable,” he commented quietly. “ You spent a lot of time there, made a lot of friends..”
“ It still seems so unreal,” she admitted with a short, nervous laugh. “ Nothing that happened there since you guys arrived.. It just doesn’t seem possible.”
“ No, it doesn’t,” Jack agreed, shifting uncomfortably. “ Umm, Carter.. There were things that happened down there.. Things that were said.. Now we’re going home..”
“ The whole situation was very intense,” Sam justified for him. “ Everything that happened.. happened on the spur of the moment. It wasn’t.. It wasn’t real.”
Jack nodded, relieved. “ So we’re.. We’re okay?”
“ We’re okay, Colonel,” Sam smiled assuredly at him. “ What happened between us down there stays between us. We can get past it. We’re going to have to get past it. There’s no room for anything like that at home.” She breathed in slowly. “ Home. It’s so strange to think about going back there.”
“ Feeling nervous?”
“ Oh, yeah.” Sam released her breath slowly, one of her hands moving to fidget with her locket. “ I’m sure Captain Gardam’s had plenty of time to say whatever she wants to say about me. There’ll be no one at the SGC who doesn’t know what kind of life I’ve led here. It’s going to be hard to face them.”
“ You’ll cope.” Jack reassured her with a friendly clap on the shoulder as he walked away. “ You always do.”
“ Not always,” she muttered under her breath once he was out of earshot. She wrapped her arms about herself and took deep, calming breaths. Denying all that had happened to them was the right thing to do. Once she had settled back into the role of Major Carter, if she settled back into the role, they wouldn’t be allowed to have anything else.
She bit down on her bottom lip and brought a hand to her cheek to wipe away the remnants of the single tear that escaped from her eye. She was going back to an uncertain future on a world she felt she didn’t belong on. She was going back to the rules and regulations that restricted who she was and what she was entitled to have and feel. She was going back to discover who were her true friends, and who were her enemies.
Sam tightened her arms around herself and sighed shakily. After months of wanting to go home, why wasn’t she happier about actually doing it? Why did she feel like it was just the beginning of the nightmare, rather than its end?
~*~
Thor appeared with a flash of light as the ship slowed to a halt in Earth’s orbit. “ Major Carter, Colonel O’Neill. I will send you home now.”
“ Thank you, Thor,” Sam gave him a genuine smile.
“ Yeah, thanks, Buddy,” Jack chimed in. “ We owe ya one.”
“ It was my pleasure,” Thor bowed his head. “ I will personally make sure your belongings are sent to your home.” They were transported down before she could thank him again.
They were in the gateroom. On their arrival, an unnatural hush fell over all of the technicians and soldiers who were milling around. Everyone just stopped what they were doing and stared at them in surprise. Sam felt something twist in the pit of her stomach and unwittingly took a step closer to Jack.
“ It’s okay,” he whispered comfortingly.
The heavy doors to the gateroom slid open and Evelyn and Nicholi bounded in, with Janet and Daniel on their heels and General Hammond and Teal’c following at a slightly more reserved pace.
“ Samantha!” Evelyn threw her arms around her and hugged her tightly. “ I am so glad to see you! I was so worried Colonel O’Neill would be too late!”
“ We almost were,” Jack spoke up, addressing General Hammond. “ That’s why we took a little longer to get home, Sir. Thor had to do some medicine-thing to Carter.”
General Hammond appeared concerned. “ You’re okay, Major?”
“ Yes, Sir,” Sam smiled weakly as Evelyn disengaged her from their embrace and moved to stand beside her fiancé. “ I’m fine, thank you.”
Beaming, General Hammond stepped closer to her and embraced her in a fatherly hug. “ Welcome home, Sam. It’s good to have you back.”
Smiling fondly, Sam returned the hug and they pulled apart. “ It’s good to be back, Sir.”
Daniel and Janet were the next to hug her, both of them too impatient to wait to hug her separately, the three of them hugging enthusiastically. “ You’re home!” She wasn’t sure which one of them said it but it struck a cord with her. Everyone kept saying she was home and welcoming her home.. but it didn’t feel as she’d expected it to. She didn’t feel like she was home.
“ Well, I think Major Carter has been through enough for the time being.” General Hammond’s voice broke the group apart. Daniel moved away to stand by Teal’c but Janet lingered at her friend’s side. “ Colonel, I’d like to hear your report now.”
“ Yes, Sir.” With a small grin in Sam’s direction, Jack followed his superior officer out of the gateroom.
“ Hey, Nicholi, Evelyn, you wanted to see where you might be living,” Daniel remembered, his eyes lighting up. “ Come on and I’ll show you some pictures of where you could end up. See you later Sam, welcome back.” Waving, Daniel took Evelyn and Nicholi from the gateroom, Teal’c following as he usually did.
Sam blinked rapidly to clear her vision, the tears she felt suffocating her rising to prickle her eyes. She forced herself to take deep breaths, feeling as though she were about to start hyperventilating.
“ So Sam,” Janet smiled, obvious to Sam’s growing panic, putting an arm around her friend’s waist. “ I’ve got the perfect treat for you after your medical and debriefing. A gallon of Chunky Chocolate ice cream and the latest Richard Gere movie. What more could a girl want?” Sam didn’t answer but her breathing became more and more laboured. “ Sam honey? What’s wrong?”
“ I need to get out of here,” Sam gasped, fighting the urge to be sick. She felt dizzy and terrified, seeing the people in the Gateroom look at her from the corner of their eyes, pointing discreetly and whispering. “ I need to get out of here, Janet.”
“ Okay.” Janet tried to be reassuring and calming, sensing the panic rising in Sam as her friend frantically looked around. “ It’s okay, Sam. We’ll go to my office, okay? Come on.” Hurriedly, she led Sam out of the Gateroom, quickening their pace once they were away from the prying eyes of the Gateroom technicians.
Within no time at all, they were safely enclosed in the sanctuary of Janet’s office. Sam all but collapsed into the chair she was offered, burying her head in her hands as her body trembled. Unsure as to what to do, Janet poured her a glass of water and held it out to Sam, frowning at the fear she saw in her friend’s eyes when Sam lifted her head to take it.
“ Thanks,” Sam mumbled, struggling to keep a steady grip on the glass. She took a little sip, certain she wouldn’t be able to manage more than that.
“ Sam?” Janet asked a few minutes later, taking the glass from her before she dropped it. “ You want to tell me what happened back there?”
Shaking her head, Sam wrapped her arms around herself, trembling violently. “ I can’t do this, Janet,” she whispered brokenly. “ I can’t come back here. I can’t stand the whispers and the looks, knowing what everyone’s thinking about me.. I can’t be the person I’m supposed to be.” A tear made its way down her cheek, followed by another and another. “ I don’t know how to be the person you all want me to be. I can’t remember what she was like.”
“ Hey.” Janet knelt beside her chair and gently tugged Sam into her arms, startled to see her normally so in-control friend so emotionally unstable. Her mind wandered back to the journal she had hidden in the bottom drawer of her desk, wondering what would be revealed once she started reading it, wondering if there would be an explanation for the changes her friend had
undergone, wondering if she was brave enough to find out what they were. “ Sam, you've been through so much this year, it's understandable that you're a little confused. Hell, after what you've been through since joining the SGC.. This is bound to be traumatic for you. You were taken from one life, put in another and now you've been taken from that one. It's going to take
time for you to get your bearings again. You'll need time to adjust and no one is going to fault you for that.” Moving away slightly to look into Sam's eyes, Janet gave her the most reassuring smile she could muster. “ You have us all here to help you do that. We're here for you now, no matter what.”
“ What if I can’t adjust?” Sam sniffed, too tired and scared to bother wiping the tears away from her face. “ What if I let everyone down and can’t fit in at the SGC anymore? I don’t know if I can go on fighting, Janet. I don’t know if I can start being Major-Doctor Carter again after being away from the role for so long.”
“ If you can’t, you’ll still have us,” Janet promised. “ It will take a lot for us to leave you alone, Sam. I promise you that. No matter what happens, no matter what you decide, you will *always* have us.”
Sam wasn't so sure. She forced a smile and pretended like she was convinced, drying her eyes and allowing Janet to lead her to the infirmary for her physical. She sat on the bed and did what she was told to do, listening half-heartedly to what Janet was saying, careful to smile and make appropriate noises in the right places.
Her mind was elsewhere. Her mind was whirling with doubts and fears.
The character of Major Carter, the role she was expected to play in this place.. It seemed so illusive, so far off. She couldn't believe she had ever been that confident, that sure of herself. It didn't seem possible. It didn't seem real.
She was trapped between two lives, two different personas. One on Earth that she had abandoned all hope of returning to, the way of life she had allowed herself to forget because it was less painful than remembering. One on Velenthia she had learned to embrace and accept that had given her the chance to live a life without expectations to live up to, without any rules or regulations or the fear of rejection to restrict her in anyway.
They had both been cruelly taken from her, and she had been forced to alter her life to suit them. The two planets’ she had been able to call home no longer felt like home. She felt like a stranger, a traveller, a visitor to someone else’s world.
She felt lost and alone and more terrified than she had ever felt before.
“ So I went out on a shopping spree and bought all the Richard Gere movies I could find, determined to make you watch them when you came home,” Janet was saying as she tuned herself back into the conversation, forcing a smile as Janet looked at her expectantly. “ I think I blew the limit on my credit card but who cares? It’s worth it, right?”
“ Sure,” Sam nodded automatically. “ It’s worth it.”
Sitting there talking to Janet, seeing Janet smile reassuringly at her and do all she could to put her at ease, Sam felt a small portion of her anxiousness dissipate. She couldn’t be certain her friendships with her team mates would survive were she to leave the SGC; in her mind, her friendship with Jack - Colonel O’Neill – was already in jeopardy thanks to the new memories
they’d created on Velenthia, memories she knew she was going to have trouble forgetting. His words to her on Thor’s ship had made sense but they’d hurt. Janet was different, though. That was why she’d entrusted her with her journal. Janet would understand all she’d done and all she’d been through.
After all, if Janet didn’t..
.. No one would.
~*~
“And when I left, it's you who stayed.
You always knew that I'd come home again.
In the end,
You are my one true friend.”
~ ‘One True Friend’, Bette Midler
~*~
*smiles innocently* Now, a short epilogue and an even shorter sequel have been planned.. Want them? Let me know! *g* Seriously, feedback of all and any type welcome at the e-mail addresses listed below:
~*~
Joey@Ram32.freeserve.co.uk / CksGirl_MIA@hotmail.com
Near yet Far by Jo R
Story Notes: AUTHOR'S NOTES: Mainly in 3rd person narrative though there are a few sections in 1st person POV – I think it's clear to see who's thinking/saying what in those sections.
AN 2: There were some comments made about the lack of decent characterisation in some S/J stories a while back and they've kinda stuck with me. I tried my best and that's good enough for me. I hope it's good enough for at least some of you.
DEDICATION: Little Miss, who I made listen to me ramble on and on about this for months before deciding to start it. Sorry, LM ;) Also Lynn, who read it when LM wouldn't ;) Thanks for your help and suggestions! Pepsi, just for being, simply, Pepsi.
AN 2: There were some comments made about the lack of decent characterisation in some S/J stories a while back and they've kinda stuck with me. I tried my best and that's good enough for me. I hope it's good enough for at least some of you.
DEDICATION: Little Miss, who I made listen to me ramble on and on about this for months before deciding to start it. Sorry, LM ;) Also Lynn, who read it when LM wouldn't ;) Thanks for your help and suggestions! Pepsi, just for being, simply, Pepsi.
DISCLAIMER: All publicly recognisable characters, settings, etc, are the property of their respective owners. Any original characters and plots are the property of the author. No money is being made from this work. No copyright infringement is intended. ... [ read more ]