Title: Jack vs Windows.
Author: Neferlue
Season: 6 I guess.
Spoilers: None
Rating: G
Disclaimer: I own nothing. Except Luecleste.
Summary: Jack has computer issues and needs some help….
Genre: General.
Status: Complete.
Author’s Note: I got inspired to write this story when I had some computer trouble my computer tech husband had to fix (as usual), and this story was born. I actually do play World of Warcraft, aka WoW, my main character name on any server is Luecleste or a variation. My main Luecleste is actually an 80 Night Elf rogue. My husband has a druid. Luecleste is also the Lue in my pen name.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
It was a slow week on Earth, and Jack O’Neill had some time off. He was sitting at home with a beer in hand, watching the Simpsons re-runs…. again. Something Bart said reminded him of something Daniel had said earlier that week, so he turned off the television, and walked over to his computer. He switched it on, waited for it to boot up, and logged in. He took a mouthful of his beer, and watched the programs load up. ‘Wow, I really need to get a new computer’, he thought, as it took its time. He opened up Internet Explorer and typed in the address for Google. However, Google was not what appeared. He frowned, and typed it in again, thinking he’d typed in the wrong address, and this time, a porn site appeared. That was all well and nice, but not what he was interested in at the moment. He shook his head, and closed the net window. A message popped up. “Internet Explorer has encountered an error and needs to close. If the problem persists, please contact the person who manages your computer.” Frowning again, he clicked it to close the message. As soon as he did, another one opened. “Explorer has encountered an error and needs to close. If the problem persists, please contact the person who manages your computer.” “But I just closed Explorer, for cryin’ out loud!” he said to the computer. Impassively, the message still sat there on the screen. With a sigh, he held in the power button until the computer turned off.
Getting up off the chair, he walked over to his phone and picked it up, sat down on the couch, and rang Daniel.
When Daniel picked up, Jack could hear noises in the background, clangs and sort of blasting noises. “Daniel, turn down the TV!” he exclaimed. “Oh, it’s not the TV, Jack, Dr. Lee asked me to try this game he plays, called ‘World of Warcraft’. It’s got all these races fighting to save the world and-”
“Daniel! Not interested! Do you want to come over for a few drinks?”
“Oh, sorry, Jack, I really want to get a up a bit higher. Dr. Lee said he’d take me through somewhere called Deadmines tonight if I got up high enough, and apparently it has some good gear for my druid, Luecleste, and-”
“Daniel! Not interested! Lee tried to get me into that thing too. I said no. So, seeing as you’re busy, I’ll give Carter a call. My computers acting… funny.”
“That’s really a good idea, Jack, she can fix it for you.”
“Yes, Daniel, that’s what I was thinking. It’s either I call Carter, or watch Star Wars for the 50 billionth time. I’ll see you at the briefing on Monday.”
“Briefing? I didn’t think we had a-”
Jack hung up. He had no clue when the briefing was, but Daniel would call to correct him at some point. It might also drag him away from that damned game Lee was always on about.
He hit the speed dial button for Carter. She answered pretty quickly, and he was glad to note no Lee’s-Damned-Game noises in the background. “Hello?”
“Oh, hey Carter. How you doin’”
“I’m great Colonel. What’s up?”
“I’m having some computer issues. Can you fix it?”
He heard a slight sigh on the other end of the line. “Sure Colonel, I’ll be right over.”
“Thanks Carter.”
“See you soon, Sir.”
She hung up.
He sat back on the couch, setting the phone aside. He wasn’t that bad with computers, was he?
He was drawn from his thoughts by a knock at the door. He got up, and let Carter in. “Hey Carter. Thanks for coming.”
“Hey Colonel. What’s the problem?”
“Well, I wanted to look at some stuff on the net, and it was giving me the wrong sites, and then it had error thingys come up, so I turned it off.”
“Okay.” She turned on his computer, and sat down. He typed in his log on password (Homer), and went off to grab her a beer while she started.
He opened the beer for her, and set it down near her on the desk. “Thanks Sir.” She typed a few keys and exclaimed “Oh, this is impossible!”
“What is?” he asked, a bit concerned now. What could be on his computer that was impossible for Carter?
“Your anti-virus is a year out of date! You haven’t renewed the subscription! No wonder you have viruses!”
“I have a virus?”
“You have more than one virus.” She pointed to a list on the screen. “This is my own program. It tells me what’s on your computer. See, it works by seeing what you’re running and how much memory-”
“Carter, I have no clue what you’re babbling on about.”
She smiled and looked down at the keyboard. “Right. Sorry Sir. Well, this program here,” she pointed at a line on the list. “It’s running a redirection protocol that redirects any address you type in your address bar to another random address. Usually, they are quite harmful sites that contain other viruses which will then download themselves onto your computer.”
“So, that explains the porn site.”
“Porn site, sir?”
“Carter, we’re off duty. It’s Jack. And yes. I tried to go to Google, and I got a porn site.”
“Right Jack. I believe you.” She had a slight smirk on her face as she said it.
“Hey! I opened up Internet Explorer, and it did this weird thingy where I got some other site… then I got this porn site.” He paused. “It was tempting to look.”
Carter rolled her eyes.
“Well, I’ve removed the viruses. I’m going to install some programs to make sure this doesn’t happen again.”
“What sort of programs are we talking about here?”
“Mozilla Firefox, for one. Internet Explorer has far too many holes to be secure and Mozilla is a lot more safer, and it updates automatically. The anti virus is one I made myself. It also updates automatically, from the database we use at Stargate Command. You shouldn’t have these problems again.”
“Thanks Carter.”
“You’re welcome, Jack. What were you looking up, by the way?”
Jack paused. “It’s something Daniel said. I was watching the Simpsons and remembered something, and I was going to look it up.”
At that moment the phone rang.
“O’Neill.”
“Jack, it’s Daniel. The briefing’s Tuesday. And are you sure you don’t want to play this game? It’s really kinda cool.”
“I’ll pass again, Danny Boy. Thanks for reminding me about the briefing on… Tuesday. I’ll chat to you later, Carter’s fixing my computer. Apparently it had viruses.”
“Viruses? Oh. Ok, well, I’ll talk to you later. Good luck with those viruses.” He hung up.
Jack turned back to Carter. “Daniel was letting me know when we had the briefing. And Lee’s got him into that game he’s always going on about. Sounds too complicated to me.”
Carter dipped her head and laughed.
“Another beer?”
“Sure.”
They moved over to Jack’s couch. “So, did Lee try to get you into that game, too?”
“Yeah… I told him I was too busy atm. He was really quite insistent.”
Jack put his feet up on his coffee table, and took another sip of his beer. “So, what’d you tell him?”
“That I was too busy with everything I’m doing to play any games, let alone one with 80 levels. And, I paged myself.”
Jack laughed. “You paged yourself?”
Sam smiled. “Yeah. I told him it was an emergency and went to see Janet.”
“Nice. I’ll have to remember that one.”
He settled back into his couch and kept on chatting with Carter. Looking at her, he realized how lucky he really was to have someone like her in his life. Her, and the rest of his team. It certainly was something worth living for.
“Sir?”
“Wha?”
“Did you hear what I just said?”
“Yeah… you were talking about nintendos again.”
She sighed. “No, I wasn’t.”
“Ok, I was just thinking of something.”
“What?”
“Oh, nothing important. So, tell me more about Stan the foodguy and that nurse….”
Yep, friendship certainly was worth it. Even if it was nothing else, friendship he could live with.
Please visit my sci-fi, fantasy and anime forum: http://the-phoenix-lair.lefora.com/
DISCLAIMER: All publicly recognisable characters, settings, etc, are the property of their respective owners. Any original characters and plots are the property of the author. No money is being made from this work. No copyright infringement is intended. ... [ read more ]